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loc'd psyience's Journal

26th July, 2004. 8:59 am. code breakin' and such....

...my mother is the most avid of readers...i swear she speed reads thru shyt like she's drinking a cool glass of water out of a short glass....it's like she devours books ..*lol*...i've tried many times to follow in her footsteps...and i do, sometimes, do my mama proud with the reading...*she was an English major back so my reading and writing skills were always noted and expounded regardless of my age...* but most times, something or someone else catches my attention and that's that....la has been really into reading these days....makes me wanna pick up something to expand my knowledge base, u know....so i started reading the Da Vinci Code...mind u, i've had this book in my possession for like a month and a half at least..*lol*...but anywho...it is a true page turner...if i u're into shyt like symbolism...code breaking....secret societies....art....catholicism...., this novel is definitely for u...and i just love how the author *can't remember his name at the moment* makes this disclaimer in the very beginning that information in the book is based on fact....and not some made up fictious shyt that he thought of....i dug that....

ok, it's about 4 weeks until my vacation...i finally managed to slip one in this year...i really need this too...tlo just get away into the mountains...have nothing but lazy days filled with endless grillin'....water fights....attempting to become a true fisherman like my pop-pop..*lol*....chillin' with la...this is what i look forward to the most...being in her presence....soaking up this wonderful crisp scenery...making coffee and sitting out on the porch in the early morning....i've lived in the city my whole damn life...but i swear i can't get enough of the country life...well, the psuedo country life...i don't know how well i could handle the 'realness' of living in such an environment....being Black...a womyn...and a lesbian...i don't know bout that combination when u throw in some backwood mentality and dirt road logic...*shrugs*...alas, a mere 4 weeks away....i'm starting the countdown...la has already made the list...we're well on our way....

my sister called me over the weekend to tell me that while she did let this womyn...ok, let me back up...about a couple of months ago, my sister comes over to my house...sits in my bedroom and tells me that she thinks she wants to broaden her sexuality to include wimmin...*eyes rollin HARD*....so yeah, she's finally found a womyn that at least appears to be as into my sister as my sister is into this experience...don't ask me do i believe they have a long life within this relationship...*i think not...hell nah...no haps..this is her first...she would be insane to think that this womyn actually wants to give my sister her all when she can't even be upfront about how old she is*...ok, wait....ok, back to this now.....so she calls and tells me that she's 'slowed' down the pace with this womyn due to her lying all over the place about shyt that's not worth putting so much gumption into creating a damn lie for...that they are now friends, but still will continue on with the intimacy and such...*again with the eye rollin'*...i have far too much going on right now to concern myself with this situation....but geez, man...i wish she would've listened a bit more when i was trying to break down the delicate dynamics of the black lesbian relationship...some shyt u just gotta live and learn and i know i'm just being the bad ass older sister trying to protect her from shyt.....

i need to see my father....we need to have discussion...i need to know the parts of me that i have yet to understand or even begin to comprehend....

Current mood: working.
Current music: Here But I'm Gone - Curtis Mayfield featuring Lauryn Hill.

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