| ahh. |
[ February 21st, 2008 | 2:07pm ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 awake |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
ROBIN...ahh you bitch. |
] |
robin sucks bawls for blocking me on myspace IM.
and she doesnt know how to unblock me.
SUCK IT UP BITCH.
LOOLOLL.
|
| oh my god. |
[ February 21st, 2008 | 1:25pm ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
awake |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
deftones- mascara |
] |
its been forever and a day.
i havent updated this thing in years.
well.
heres what happened.
i got my tounge pierced.
i got a new bubbybear (christian) ♥
i got to fucking troy buchannon high school.
i live in missouri.
fuck.
|
|
[ December 30th, 2003 | 12:07am ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 blank |
] |
i havent updtaed in hella long time... heres my new journal www.greatestjournal.com/~emoxtears
|
|
[ November 16th, 2003 | 3:54am ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 ecstatic |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
The new Hit everyonEs talking about |
] |
check out my new journal! www.greatestjournal.com/~emoxtears ... IM me on AIM : [jezabelnh3ll] email me: [skater_gurlie55467@yahoo.com] or [jezabelnh3ll@earthlink.net]....~ALISIA....I <3 Michael.... Evan rox ,MUAH
|
| night night. |
[ October 29th, 2003 | 8:51pm ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
tired |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
OperationIvy- Jaded |
] |
Well I'm going to sleep... Goodnight kiddies.
|
| update |
[ October 29th, 2003 | 5:10pm ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 thankful |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Anti Flag- Stars and Stripes |
] |
Yipee. I finally got one of those retarded I.D's for school. My picture sucks ass. My friend Mike gave me his old one, hehe(its cute). Im now making more friends in school. What I dont get is most people label me as "gothic". When I went to warrensburg they said it "gothlic" ..... preps. I hate labels thats why I dont label anyone or myself.
December 20th is Brandon Sweeny. I finally remembered his last name lol. I remember when I first met him. He was the sweetest thing ever.
stwbrycarbear410: sex is funner with a guy
xxxR o o d yxxx: What did you all do...And I want details ;-) j/k
stwbrycarbear410: lol
stwbrycarbear410: i was seriously going to tell you details ..lol
xxxR o o d yxxx: ok, If you want ;-)
hehehe. - Special Shoutouts to~ Brandon Sweeny, Brandon Myers, Andy Breeze, Justin Binkley, Derrek Williams, Chris, and Jill
|
| another quiz kiddies! |
[ October 25th, 2003 | 10:43am ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 cynical |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Brand New- Seventy times seven |
] |
For chicks, read this one: You're a sexy punk
rocker. You're every punk boy's dream, and you
know it. It's great to be you.
For guys, read this one: You're the mello-punk
rocker. You just sit back and enjoy yourself..
go to some shows, maybe do some drugs... or
chicks. Life is good, huh?
Alright, punk. Let's see what kinda punk you are.
brought to you by Quizilla
|
| a whole new subject |
[ October 19th, 2003 | 6:25pm ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
excited |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
AFI- highschool football hero |
] |
schools alright my friend katie is the craziest girl eva..i luv you fosho..lol. yeah my school is ghetto but i love it. and i promise you im not turning ghetto :)
GUESS WHATS COMING UP? me and andy's 1 year anniversery. Also is my friend brandons anniversery on December 20th. I met him a year ago. Me and him are like two finger crossed together. I'm always there for him and he's there for me. I need to download adobe paintshop.. if anyone has a link so i can download it please send it to me. anyways i got to go .. luv yas.
|
| is this enough for you? |
[ October 19th, 2003 | 6:03pm ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 accomplished |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Juliana Theory- Rainy day song |
] |
ok, i havent updated this thing in along time. i should update it more when i have enough time. i made some new friends at school but the thing is their all boys. yeah if you wana talk to me my #'s 875-7004..figure out the area code.
im starting to think more positive things about stuff.....thats a change. My friend tinas changing alot on me. She's turning into a wicca/goth. But whatever she is she's always going to be my friend.
I might cut this entry short, I'll have time later to update it some more. I'm also going to edit my layout.
|
| To All The Hopeless Romantics. |
[ September 27th, 2003 | 1:36pm ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 lonely |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
.emo punk. The Used- Poetic Tragedy |
] |
to all the hopeless romantics
who's feelings are true
for the right person
i know this feeling is right
hold me in his arms tonight
this blade lay down to rest
i slit my arm i slit my chest
he left me for her
i know he's the one
if i take the chance
will it be more or less
|
| intelligant fool |
[ September 21st, 2003 | 9:17am ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
awake |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
.emo. Saves The Day- Anywhere with you |
] |
okay so i moved into a foster home. it was shitty, 9 people living in a small ass house. went to warrensburg school dance and skipped it with coty johnson and his friend preston. ive become rebellious against society. i currently move in with my grandma until Oct 14th. But I feel less suicidal.
Currently tried stupid things in the past when I was in foster care. I visit my dad everyday and talk to andy. I dont think he cares as much anymore as he use to. I think we should maybe talk. Anyways, might be getting some new shoes, SOME VANS! *partys*. some white with blue vanes. or black with pink.
I currently found a new role model for me. The girl in the band Coal Chamber. And Im now starting back to Stephen Decatur on Tues. Lucky for me I didnt have to stay at warrensburg. I havent wrote in my journal in along time because i been in foster care.
DCFS started me on Birth Control patch. YUCK. I hate it.
|
| party cult |
[ September 4th, 2003 | 9:15am ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 anxious |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
.hardcore. Coal Chamber- El Cu Cuy |
] |
Back to school
Back to school
Gonna prove to daddy - I'm not a fool
Back to school
Back to school
Got my lunch packed up
My shoes tied tight
Hope I don't get in - a - fight
|
| Time for some quizes Kiddies! |
[ August 21st, 2003 | 7:50pm ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
calm |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
.emo/punk. rufio- just a memory |
] |
I'm sure it's no big surprise to you that your
romance is The Princess Bride. A heartwarming
tale of "Twue Wuve" that has giants,
Spainards and swashbuckling. You really do
think that love can overcome anything. You may
be a touch naive but your heart is certainly in
the right place. You've probably got one of
those relationships where proper nouns have
been replaced with "Snookums" and
"Pookie Pie". Eww. Beware a cuteness
overload.
What Romance Movie Best Represents Your Love Life?
brought to you by Quizilla
|
| I <3333 Andy |
[ August 13th, 2003 | 6:06pm ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
ecstatic |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
.emo.punk. Thursday- Understanding in a carwash |
] |
Okay, I miss you andy. I would call you but I dont have long distance. Il try my bestest to get a calling card. You need to get online sometime. I need to talk to you really bad. I dont care where we talk as long as Im talking to you.
I miss you so much, Its been killing me that we havent talked in awhile. Just ignore what Ryan says, I still love you no matter what. We were meant to be together. It was fait we met, I loved you ever since we met, and will always love you.......no matter what.... I love you -Alisia
|
| nothing to lose |
[ August 13th, 2003 | 5:42pm ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 curious |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
.emo,rock. Weezer- suzanne |
] |
Ok, schools starting in 1 week or so. I'm afraid to start, by then Andy will be moved. I'll miss him, also last night was the coolest night ever. I talked to Andrew till 5 am. I think I really like him. But if you wondering, I LOVE Andy so everythings okay. :)
I couldnt go to the Edge tonight because my dad "said so". I hate it when parents say "Because" or, "I said so" or "I dont need to give you an answer". I Hate my dad, I think he's going to start drinking again. I tried to throw up last night. I have a eating disorder/ innerexia(sp?). My risperdol(sp?) is making me gain a lil pounds. So I stopped taking it and Paxil. It doesnt do anything anyway, why should I take it?
Andrew might come over tonight or tomorrow to drop off some cd's and I'm letting him barrow my linkin park cd's and disturbed cd. My dads being a jackass because now he has no trust in me. But I dont give a shit. Today has been a realllyyy weird day. Well I might write later, I'm going to make salute on my webcam and try and take some pictures. Also at 5 AM I met Andrew .. Aug 13,2003. ..Peace
|
| this is an other story. |
[ August 12th, 2003 | 2:49pm ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
busy |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
.hardcore. Static X- I'm with stupid |
] |
Ok, so Andy didnt call me last night. I dont even know why I waited for the phone call. So I called Ryan and then talked to his friend Andrew for the rest of the night. Andrew seems really cool. I would of stopped by where he works and visit him or something, but I had to go to Peoria. Andy just called, I dont know if I wana talk to him. Ryan said he doesnt deserve me. But I still love Andy, it just seems like Andy doesnt love me.
I tried spiking my hair up last night while I was on the phone with Brandon. He was like "its not going to work, your hair is to long" i was like "I dont care, I'll try it anyway"..... As far as it turned out it didnt work. Brandon's right my hair is to long. He was like "I told you, but you didnt listen".
I might go take a nappy, I'm tired. Woke up at 6 am and was on the phone at 3 talking to Andrew on the phone. I found out something about Ryan...... I duno if I can trust him again. Andrew might come to The Edge wednesday for me *YAY*. Brandon also said HE'D STEAL ME A MONKEY FROM THE ZOO!!! <3 me lufs brandon
|
| a dream of walking. |
[ August 11th, 2003 | 7:46pm ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
anxious |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
.punk. Anti Flag- 911 for peace |
] |
So yesterday was a long day. Ryan came over for a bit and we hung out, yeah. I stole some stuff from the hospital. I got dizzy again today, I think i lit to much inscense again. I told Andy to call me but my dad had to use the fucking phone....I'm pissed off now and depressed. Feel like cutting myself but my dad will send me to springfield. I dont want to leave Ryan or Andy. :(
I'm thinking about starving myself or eating 1 meal a day because my stomach is always hurting. So thats my plan. I'm mad because I cant find my pacifier still. Its soooo cool, its clear. You press the button and it lights up. I got it in St. Louis DAMNIT! Ok thats all I'm going to write in my journal I'm going to sleep or take a nap. I woke up today at 5:00 PM. and still tired. :\
|
| a convo with ryan |
[ August 10th, 2003 | 2:24am ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
impressed |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
.emo/indie/punk. The All American Rejects- My Paper Heart |
] |
stwbrycarbear410: grrr
stwbrycarbear410: *bites you*
FreeCouponODeath: yum
FreeCouponODeath: lol
stwbrycarbear410: lol
stwbrycarbear410: GUESS WHAT!!
FreeCouponODeath: what
stwbrycarbear410: guess :)
FreeCouponODeath: you love me
stwbrycarbear410: yep <3
FreeCouponODeath: awww
FreeCouponODeath: i love ya 2
stwbrycarbear410: hehe
FreeCouponODeath: but what was it really
stwbrycarbear410: i missed you earlier :(
FreeCouponODeath: aww
FreeCouponODeath: my step dad said u called
stwbrycarbear410: yea
stwbrycarbear410: i did.. i admitt it
FreeCouponODeath: lol
FreeCouponODeath: u have to admit it
FreeCouponODeath: ur name was on the caller id
FreeCouponODeath: ha
stwbrycarbear410: hehe
|
| where am i at today? |
[ August 9th, 2003 | 5:21pm ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
impressed |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
.industrial. KMFDM- Fuck me |
] |
Ok, so i woke up at 2 pm with a phone call from amanda wanting to spend the night. "nevermind i cant spend the night"..."umm ok" i said. Then i called brandon and was like "WASSSUUPPPPPPP, twiztid is in bloomington sept, 25th." "OMFG I GOTA GO, can you take me?" "i cant drive legally!!" then he said he'd call me back. i got my industrial, trance, techno, and gothic music back because last night i downloaded netscape radio,yay!. i was watching coal chamber music video while getting ready and putting my contacts in. i want my hair like that girl. like the girl on ftj s1nthet1k, she's beautiful. I love her hair, she's my role model <3
i have a feeling im turning industrial gothic on me. i wana stay who i am, it scares me. anyways, its just music. what is it changing? i still love emo/indie/trance/techno/punk/alternative/rock/mod .. im not changing, it just i added new interests in music :)
im listening to a kick ass indtustrial song. Deathline International- Into the Storm....listen to it sometime..you'll love it. try listening to cruxshadows and kmfdm.. their goood. ;)
I lost my damn pacifier. Chris wont leave me alone about "nude pics" which i'll never send him. ill only send those to my bf <3 . i have my hair up like vanessa always has her hair. wearing my black dress thing, its gothic<3
i might be getting some shoes from hot topic and my hair dyed. i cant wait.
last night andrew was like "ryans passed out" i was like "awwwwwwwwwwwww". hehe i bet he looks so cute sleeping. i wish we could hang out the mall sometime, that would be great. Chris wants me to take him some pics but knowing me, ima lazy mofo.. so , yeah =]
well im going to end this, i might write back later.... i got a question... what do you like on your pizza? sausage? cheese? parm. cheese? pineapple(sp?)? just wondering :P
|
| so today. |
[ August 8th, 2003 | 7:01pm ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
cynical |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
cardigans- my favorite game |
] |
so today i felt like i need to down photoshop. should i? or should i waste space on my computor?. Very bored today, nothing to possibly do. Only watch movies. Watching movies make me feel like no worries. I'm in an other place. My dad thinks I'm crazy because I want a pentagram necklace. He's all like "the devil will have your soul". Ugh. Listening to shit like that wants to make me puke. I have a feeling I'm losing some friends. Its a possiblity.
YUP! thats right. Tomorrow getting a hair cut 1 inch. Can't wait, I've been wanting my hair cut for awhile now. I use to have my hair long but had the feeling to cut it because it got on my nerves. So I found out this girl/or boy? was faking my pics. I told her to use their own pics but I'm not lending them my pics out and letting them fake it and get away with it. It feel weird getting your pics faked. But at least I made my salute to prove I'm not fake. BOO-YAH!.
I remember a conversation me and my friend had aboput abortions(sp). I found out I'm the kind of person that I dont know for sure. Then talked to vanessa (kick ass raver). I think she's a raver, it confuses me. She finally got a boyfriend(their a cute couple). Ryan and Vanessa. I try not to get in their relationship to much.
I seem to have cravings for emo and trance music often. I need to down this radio thingy over. So I can listen to trance and industrial music again. I miss my industrial music *sad face*. Can't wait to get it back. I been writing alot of poetry. But I seem to SUCK. So it doesnt matter.
Thats the story of my weekend :)
|
| emotional taste in music |
[ August 8th, 2003 | 6:26pm ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
sympathetic |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
social distortion- ball and chain |
] |
last night i tried talking to andy. didnt answer me so i went off and cut myself again. then talked to ryan on the phone, he made me feel a little better about myself. i was on the phone till 10-4 am on the phone last night. i cried all day yesterday, but not when i was on the phone. i rented a movie STRANGELAND. Its coo, i might get the soundtrack. IT HAS COAL CHAMBER ON IT <3. Coal chambers a awesome band. I need to make a new layout for my journal. Im trying to go to the mall so I can meet ryan there. He's coo, I havent seen brandon in like a month *sad face*. So i might get a haircut tomorrow. I'm getting it cut 1 inch. Ryan thinks I shouldnt dye it because its good the way it is. I want my hair spiked up like Brody on the distillers. and have it Blue or Green. THAT WOULD KICK ASS!. I might see Twiztid in bloomington. But knowing my chances I might not. I seen Ontavious and Allan(sp?) at the Edge. I was like OMFG. Then I tried calling amanda last night. They were like "call her tomorrow to see whats wrong with her" i was like...omg..she's mad at me. anywayz..... how was your summer? ...im just wondering... an awesome summer? crazy summer? boring? just curious =]
|
| happy!!yay |
[ August 7th, 2003 | 2:46pm ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
awake |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
sublime rancid- i wana riot |
] |
hehe, ryans sopose to call me tonight.....COOL!!!!..
|
| falling stars |
[ August 7th, 2003 | 2:31pm ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
geeky |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
thursday- understanding in the car wash |
] |
watching the stars with you
|
| navigation |
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| |
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] |
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