Ely's Blurty Entries [entries|friends|calendar] Ely [ userinfo | blurty userinfo ] [ calendar | blurty calendar ]

S.k.i.p. [10 Nov 2003|10:49pm] [ mood | morose ] ......... i wish i could skip today. God, it was awful. I've been feeling really bad lately with my throat, so I got the balls to go to the stupid doctor and they did a bunch of test on me. W.e. I don't think I have mono I just feel crappy. Flu i guess. Anyway, for the highlight of my day my girlfriends mom told her how she supects of me being gay. She played it off well, she states, but it always seems to happen to me. She took it offensively when I said that, but what i mean is simply how whenever i'm in a relationship the parents end up with doubts like those about me. It sucks. The one relationship that has gone on well for me, no games, no fighting (at least not so much, at all), its soo good. This has been what i've been waiting for, forever. FUCK the age shes 14 yeah, but shes the chick im in love with... the person she's 20 times more mature than most 17 year olds. What if I end up loosing her for this shit, meaning her mom knowing. I've known for a while that she saw something weird in me, but chelsea told me naw don't worry, and now, today, when she told me what her mom had said...... wow i can't explain how it crushed me. I wanted to cry and I DONT cry, so I just stayed quiet the whole time and held it in. Now, before I left her house her best friend was on her sn so I hmm let me see and I go into her sent mail, there I clicked on a radom email and the begining sentence said something with oh thats nice that you miss me. Then she jumped and pulled me back, meanwhile her best friend deleted the email. It doesnt round up in a good way, AT ALL. She says it was nothing, and I know she wouldnt play me but that was some way of her playing around. I guess im just a dumbass being insecure and assuming. ::closes eyes:: i really don't wanna loose this chick, yes a chick, damn i donno how im so gay. But im soo fallen for her it's pathetic. I'd do anything for her although she doesn't ask for anything. I dunno what else to say..... =/ later 3 comments|post comment

longgg time.. [03 Nov 2003|10:23pm] its been a lonng time i dont write up in hurrr lol ::sighs:: whoa so alot has happened... swimming school all that good stuff huh. Let's start off with swimming, the season ended, but it turned out pretty good. We won all our meets and lost one. Against who did we loose?, u ask. KROP also known as KRAP to us. geez let me explain the have like 300000 girls that are good for nothing and HIGH school swimming is based on points, alot of ppl = alot of points. So that sucks, i really don't want to get into detail with that issue. So NEXT, we also lost districts to them, but our boys won =] alot went on though, meaning in districts. That's because me and Dongi got into an argument but that was settled. We ended up in states this past weekend which was cool my last states how sad =/ we did like we always do we were 1 away! lmao anywho, school is boring nothing to say about that. I got a guitar thats pretty cool i dunno how to play shyt except like G lmao and that white strips piece and chelsea begining of her band song yeah thats where the line is drawn i dunno shyt how sad ::cries:: My girlfriend is good.. shes on the phone with me right now... but her dumbass got mono from ANOTHER chick thanks isnt that always great... the deal is when we broke up she kissed some chick and that girl ended up with mono a week later and chelsea ended up with mono like 2 weeks ago nice bed time story huh? okay well i miss her alot =] christy since u asked yeah thats the new one not so new cuz its been 4 months 5 on the 24th but shes cool as balls lol and shes really cute too =] treats me like a princess i cant ask for anything more. shes an awesome influence on me makes me smile is honest shes sucha dork... uhh i luff her =x uhhhh shes my moon and my star and my sun =] how corny thanks u know how i do (lol babe) well im out hey christy w.b. to me =] mwaa xoxo 1 comment|post comment

What a week... [10 Oct 2003|09:13pm] What can I say... I basically havent been to school in a week. no school monday tuesday and wednesday there was some FCAT testing for the 11 and 12th graders that failed it soo the point of going those days was none. Thursday I went to 4th period spanish and I left during lunch to see our divers dive but that got cancelled. So I picked up my girlfriend and we went to lunch that was something I did aloot this week =] Now were going to some comedy club and then some party soo w.e. im out were leaving latezz 3 comments|post comment

whEwwwwww [31 Aug 2003|12:01pm] woo ho0o! labor day weekend it is. And my rentz are out of town for 3 days haha... You know what that means... lol same old shyt but neway... Ive had a kick ass weekend so far! We went to senior frogs friday we all got drunk me buzzed but we had a gooood time lmao the h0t waiter chick lol and the 11 ::sighs:: =] yippeee well last night we went to Concord. We saw estrejita =] and sandra damn those boobs talk lol ;) naw but all our ppl were there although half of u were trashed jesus tania was jus out there lmao *star* oh man... Naw but we had fun danced as usual me and Janet left like at 3 kinda early but w.e. We woke up early today cuz were gonna go surf now ::jumps:: haha well im out were leaving.... LaTezzzz 1 comment|post comment

BlAhh! [27 Aug 2003|08:11pm] [ mood | crushed ] [ music | NONE ] uh chicks... theyre the same shyt man.LoL but um anyway yup me and this chick broke up well she didnt know what she wanted then she claims a big percent of her wanted to be with me but then she pops out with u know that together thing no... I was like okiez sure whatever. Yeah I had mad feelings for her. I can say it hurt. But alot of things hurt likkkkkeeeee umm lol neway She'll prob run off with some ugly ass loser chick there geez that girl is ugly. But what messed this up was the fact we barely saw each other I could of but w.e. she didnt seem as if she wasnt trying therefor I sure as fuq didnt. I told her what i wanted was hey start over fuq this b.s. we were doing and get serious about things u know. Alot of relationships go through that and I know i have before as well. So me here thinkin this girl is totally worth me sitting and telling her how i feel on the verge of tears nope she just says i dunnno i dunno and then on the phone she says for us not to be together uhh i just wish her the best I guess whoever is with her next is lucky shes an awesome girl ahhh and i made her DXMX shirt cuz I bought some letters and stuck them on a shirt and I bought a dashboard ticket which DXMX is proforeming in and damn im still gonna give it to her whatever... I did the gesture I might as well complete it maybe shell actually notice that i didnt show it so well but yea i do care a.l.o.t. and w.e. maybeee i can try to be her friend well see its hard but yea.... anyway im out jus had to let a little bit out .... still luvin my babez... =/ post comment

I HATE MEN! [22 Jul 2003|04:01pm] [ mood | stressed ] [ music | 50 cent - p.i.m.p. ] geeeeez!!! wut a freaking long hectic dai =/ wow soo many kids at wurk todai... Here's the deal.. I was guarding in the kiddy pool and in back of me is another guard chair. One of my co-workers was sitting there guardin duh and sone kid starts to drown she jumps down on the floor a throws her tube at the kid. The kid keeps drowning oviously he's despreat and the normal thing would be to see someone saving u not throwing shyt at u. Neways I was screaming at her jump jump she was like no he could reach and grab it i was like wut a freaking idiot soo yeah his teacher ended up jumpin in and saving the kid. I couldnt move bcuz im not suppose to leave my spot. but wtf man wut a blonde and they complained and shyt so w.e. im glad they did maybe shell learn how to save ppl in the correct manner. Now in the afternoon i was guardin in the kiddy pool again and i was standing but I had my leg like oh the bench one of my bosses was on the top of the slide and from there u can barely see were i was cuz theres a huge umbrela. So i moved and i was screaming at some kid and he screamed at me and wus like yea stay standing up yada yada... w.e. I get out of wurk and I go to him look I wasnt sitting i was just leaning against the bench (mind u i was standing for an hour when im only suppose to be standing for 30 minz) so yeah he was like no i saw u sitting and talking i was like what the fuq is ur problem open ur eyes cuz I wasnt sitting and I was not talking the only thing I asked was the lady for the time. Then he was like well its my wurd against urs i was like i dunt give a fuq wut ur gonna fire me go ahead I have nothing to loose. hes like no I could write u up I was like then go hes like no next time im not even gonna tell u shyt ill just write u up im like u do that ur absoulutely right i was sittin and talking but trust me u aint won cuz i always win and i left. My mom almost told that fagget something cuz he was screaming at me but she didnt know what it was about but she was proud of me hehe. Just wait till tommorrow imma burn that black ugly ass nigga. uhhh neway I miss my fuken g.f. shes like somewhere... where I dunno but w.e. I havent seen her thats nothing new and fuq it gets to me everything is perfect shes awesome but it hurts sooo much cuz I dunt get to see her as much as I want to. Damn bro, I knew this shyt would happen. Hopefully, it'll change. W.e. im just reallllly stressed out that guy got to me but w.e. im done sweating it I took it out on this journal im right i didnt do shyt wrong so im winning. Cuz eveyrone is like just drop it yada yada im like nope im not going to cuz im not gonna shut my mouth n steped on like they all do. Imma sit in that office tommorrow and my manager not that black punk is gonna hear everything i gotta sai and then guess what?! I win ok neways go0dddbye im going to bed im tired post comment

same old shyt [19 Jul 2003|11:46pm] [ mood | blah ] [ music | Deftones - Mirnerva / Stain - So far away ] here i am again with tons of crap on mi mynd. kinda sleepy at this moment. I've been going out alot and clubbin too. <~ im not even a club type nemore but w.e. I guess itz just t0 take some stress off and not think about work skool my past or my parents. newayss me and my best friend Janet are hanging out alot again which is cool shes a fun chick and we just needed a break I guess shyt happened for a rezun. The past wunt change but w.e. it taught us al0t. =] im also happie bcuz im so thankful for my life... kinda spiritual and shyt but its true I have alot of problems yeah but my family is awesome the love is indescribable, i have a caritoo a perfect girl, beautiful, honest, faithful, luving everything I want.. Thats just something I was thinking of cuz I know alot of my friends have less than half of what I do and I do reconize it =p alright, moving on, I miss my baby =/ oh, and the best part is her best friend hates me woo hoo. Oh yeah and shes such a pussy (<~ sorry for the vulgar/slang term) but yeah shes such a pussy that she wunt even tell me to my face: look I think ur an asshole, u dunt deserve my best friend, your gonna hurt her, youve always been a player and will continue to be one so on and so forth. Why cant she just do that, things are so much easier when u KEYWORD: "communicate" maybe no she doesnt know the rezuns ive been the way I have in the past. Why not just leave it where it was THE PAST. wow thats a big issue of mine now that i think about it. My past seems to haunt me yet i'm nowhere near the false image I was at that point. i guess thats what I call society even though some of us try to avoid it so much and not get caught in it were just all in society. He said she said etc etc i dunt like u ur an asshole good for nothing, they say things like that and dunt know u defining what is called society... so yeah madonna if u ever read this why dunt u tell me to my face, I heard u say u wanted to kick my ass then do so. Very mature from ur part. Yeah, I might eat shyt and say oh yea ill kick her ass but no ill just tell u everything to ur face the dai I see it. And thats the irony of this story U dunt know me... I think we've had like 0 or 1 meaningful conversations ONLINE. So, why not say it to my face, shut up, or get to know me b4 u open ur mouth about my relationships... iight thanxz.... im out post comment

Every night I talk to god, but he don't say nothing back... [06 Jul 2003|08:06pm] [ mood | sleepy ] [ music | ghett0 chyt der - on da flo0r ] some lyricz: (makes me think) Sunny days wouldn't be special, if it wasn't for rain Joy wouldn't feel so good, if it wasn't for pain Death gotta be easy, 'cause life is hard It'll leave you physically, mentally, and emotionally scarred ____________________ to: Babe Now would you leave me if you're father found out I was thuggin' (::cough cough:: GAY) ? Do you believe me when I tell you, you the one I'm loving? Are you mad 'cause I'm asking you 21 questions? Are you my soulmate? 'Cause if so, girl you a blessing Do you trust me enough, to tell me your dreams? I'm staring at ya' trying to figure how you got in them jeans If I was down would you say things to make me smile? I treat you how you want to be treated just teach me how If I was with some other chick and someone happened to see? And when you asked me about it I said it wasn't me Would you believe me? Or up and leave me? How deep is our bond if that's all it takes for you to be gone? We only human girl we make mistakes, to make it up I do whatever it take I love you like a fat kid love cake You know my style I say anything to make you smile ____________________ This is for some1 (lmao) I don't know what you heard about me But a bitch can't get a dollar out of me No Cadillac, no perms, you can't see That I'm a motherfucking P-I-M-P ____________________ ---------------------------- I like 50 cent he's an ARTIST he makes music unlike alot of ppl. Eminem is also an artist musician however you wish to call it. Anywho... I went to Marco Island this weekend, I HATE it there geeeez, its so boring. BUT I GOT MY CAR!!!! hehe so i took it and I went out I saw my girl she was there too and that made my weekend a whole lot better =] Damn I miss her alot... I was telling her how it scares me you know the whole love deal and the feelings that revolve around it. Thats something so intense and ::sighs:: just wow. There's no waii to understand or describe it I dunt even get it at times. Then there the part where my insecurity kick in. Knowin that I dunt have the greatest self eteem I think im gonna lose her over so many ppl. She's so pretty no no she's beautiful and her personality is kickass... <~~ no im not just sayin that cuz shes gonna read it. I just love to hold her and I dunt get enuff of it. It feels so right ::smiles:: =] ayy im happie I havent been happie in a while at least in the subject of love or relationships. shes so cute hehe im a lucky chick to have some1 like her u have no idea. her best friend hates me and I understand I guess im eating shyt with the p.i.m.p. song its just shes heard alot about me which is probably true i have been an asshole a dick a heatbreaker a player all of it ive been through it.... but exactly that I WENT thru it past tense... the majority of ppl go thru it. Its life u live u learn u hit urself against the wall lose a few worthwhile ppl and u move on remember what u learned and that its point blank. DROP MY PAST already... I hate that shyt uhhh whatever I guess I'll get the last laugh cuz im the one thats doing it right this time and ill just prove ppl wrong. I wanna just be happy and make my girlfriend happy thats it no more i hate haterz... whatever i know i just blurted or wrote however its not even organized my thoughts just came out but im out latez post comment

loosin' conscienceness [01 Jul 2003|11:15pm] [ mood | indescribable ] [ music | Bandages ] some gaii ass chyt I wrote: This is worthless So unpatient I'm unperfect How far will this take me No one knows it How far will it take me thru this journey Come as you are Come as you may Do as you please These pills i'll swallow What's the reality Were face to face Rejection Decisions My motivation Where did I leave it (where did I leave it) Is it only a dream Where is heaven is this hell Where is reality The look on sorrows face Why is it I dunt feel the shame Why is this song for me How far wil it take me Come as you are Come as you may Do as you please These pills i'll swallow Then I'll pretend there's no reality Why is forgiveness just a dream Why is forgiveness everything Why is it I dunt feel the shame Why is this song petrefying me I'll drift around These pills i'll swallow These rules me follow? How far will it let me How far will it take me Come as you are Do as you please Tell me the lies Show me reality yeah whatever, it's one of those days. Alot of chyt has just slapped me in the face. I'm prettie angry at this point bcuz there's a certain border line you shouldnt cross but some1 seems to like crossing lines. I've become a patient person as opposed to how I was, but I'm loosin my cool then after I loos my coinscienceness and then ___ blank. Take it as a treat as a joke however u want but just remember your fuqin with the wrroong girl. Besides that bullshyt my g-ma is sick again, she's here cuz my mom is gonna take her t0 the doc. tom. I hope everything goes well. Its enuff with her loosin vision in the only eye she has vision in and ::wheww:: that gets to me wow I luv her. =/ w.e. im out post comment

'. SurveyS! .' [29 Jun 2003|08:13pm] [ mood | bored ] name`' elizabeth` ely` hood `' hialeah añOs `' 7-teEn stats `' taiken <3 flavah`' cuban.venezuelan occu `' lyfeguard.student.athlete color `' piink.yell0w.blak.reD jamz `' r0ck` sum rap` punk` sum pop`everythin`.. [ b O d y ] bra size `' 36-c or b panties `' dem g strangz... =] brands `' ay plz i hate shoppin shoes `' i dun kare undies `' dkny'z perfume `' addidas, cool water all that yummie stuff make-up `' hmm eyeliner, mascara n eyeshadow... from m.a.c, clinique piercings `' 3 in mi ears 2 more sune, 1 in my belly button, n tounge tattoos `' zer0 [ s e x u a l i t y ] Straight? sureeee Curious? hmmm next Lesbian? me? never Had Sex? O =) virgeen 69? =) Cheated on your bf\gf? i have.... but thats stoopid Ever wanted to sleep\make out with your friends nigga? naaa Guy touched your ass? lol o g0d Ever touched a guys ass? yaaa Are you a hoe? lol n0peeee Slutty? def not Freaky? me neverrr =X [ f r i e n d z ] Who is your best friend(s)? its funny how u learn who ur true friends are Who is the craziest? janet Who is the nicest? jessika Who is the most outgoing? all of uz Who is the freakiest? me Who is the youngest? tiffany Who is the sexiest? all 0f uz Who is the one you cry to? umm it use t0 be d0ngi n jessika tew Ever wanted something more than a frienship? yup Ever kissed your friends? ya, lol Do you love your friends? u know it [ things i LIKE or LOVE ] - sp0rts - sk0ol - perfumes - pictures - mii babe - mii familie - g0d =] - food =x - my doggy - my car - CARS!!!!! - clothes - piercings - beach - partiez - dawsonz creek - fruits - thoughtful things - magz - lip gloss - sn0wboarding - life - love - friendz - pranKz - icee cream - musik - hugz <3 - god =) ----------------------------------------------------- _____[12 things that annoy you] ¤ h0ez ¤ stupidity ¤ when i dont get my way ;] ¤ having my peri0d ¤ liars are the WORST ¤ loosin things ¤ having a gut =/ ¤ tornados!!! ¤ haterz ¤ when my cars on 'E' ¤ now that dawsons creek is over =( ¤ when u tell little kids not tew run on a pool deck, bcuz theyll break their face, yet they still do _____[11 people you'd want to stay alive] ¤ Mommy ¤ Daddy ¤ Grandma ¤ My fam. ¤ Dongi ¤ Janet ¤ Chelsea ¤ Jessie ¤ Nikke ¤ .... ¤ ayy everywun! _____[10 things you'd like to change about yourself] ¤ my laziness ¤ attitude ¤ that i'll never tan , LOL ¤ my weight.. ¤ have str8 hair again ¤ pimples yuck ¤ think b4 speaking ¤ be less picky ¤ tighten up my tummy -=P ¤ my (_/_) i dunt want it _____[9 things you wear daily] ¤ shoes ¤ shirts ¤ shorts ¤ bra ¤ thonqz ¤ tounge ring ¤ bathing suit ¤ cream ¤ bracelets _____[8 movies you'd watch over and over] ¤ cruel intensions ¤ blue crush!!!!!!!!! ¤ mothman prophesies ¤ moulin rouge ¤ walk to remember ¤ 10 things i hate about u ¤ head over heals ¤ shes all that _____[7 concerts you've been to. (or wish to go to)] ¤ Ricky Martin =X (been) lol dongi ¤ Backstreet Boys =X (been) ¤ Warp Tour (going, hopefully) ¤ N'sync=X (been) ¤ Mtv Latin Music Awards... if it counts (been) ¤ evanescense or w.e. (prob. going on tues.) ¤ dashboard confessional (going in sept.) _____[6 objects you touch every day] ¤ my hair. ¤ my face. ¤ my lips ¤ my fone ¤ steering wheel ¤ food ;] _____[5 things you do every day] ¤ go outside ¤ sleep. ¤ phone ¤ shower ¤ eat _____[4 foods/drinks that you couldn't live without] ¤ water ¤ mangos ¤ milk ¤ italian fo0d _____[3 of your favorite songs at this moment] ¤ get low ¤ ms. independent ¤ I love aloooooooot of songs trust mii _____[2 people that have influenced your life the most] ¤ mom and dad ¤ close friends _____[1 thing you could spend the rest of your life with] ¤ my bed ----------------------------------------------------- 01. What color are your walls? yell0w 02. What color is your bedspread/sheets? dark blue and yell0w 03. What color is your rug? dark blue n yellow 04. Any posters/bulletin boards/designs in your room? wall paper at the edge on the roof thats yell0w... starz on mii roof... n i have swimming plackz n pics on mii walls 05. Do you have a TV? Is it big? yes n its like 37 or something 06. Do you have a phone? yep a cordless one 07. Do you have your own computer? ya 08. Do you have a desk? yep 09. What are your most treasured belongings in your room? pictures, BED lol, pillows, and mi trophies 10. What are your most favorite things in your room? mii bed lol 11. Do you have any fancy lights in your room? yeah mii light lamp and my roof lamps are fancy // GETTING READY // 01. What is the first thing you do when you wake up? go peepee =) 02. Anything unusual? na 03. Do you pick out your clothes the night before school? sumtimes 04. Do you try your best to look cute for school? plezz i g0t over that // SCHOOL // 01. What color is your backpack? bluE 02. Do you try your best when it comes to school work? eh im lazie yet i still get good grades if not whenever I feel lyke it i'll pop up with str8 A's 03. Do you listen or doodle? b0th 04. BE QUIET - we all know you doodle, but what do you doodle? my name, w.e. designs come out, cute things... etc etc 05. Do you eat your cafeteria food, or go out? naw i just drink a milk 06. What do you do right when schools over? h.w. then swim well use to if not then sleep // HOME // When you come home are you. . . 01. Miserable? only if i have a bad day 02. Happy? almost always! 03. Tired? hmm only late at night.. 04. LEAVE ME ALONE? when im maddd, in the morning when im in dee kar // OTHER // 01. Do you take walks around your neighborhood sometimes? when i walk or run, ya 02. What are some hobbies of yours? chilln, music, phone, movies, beach, mii babe, sports, work, skool, pranks etc 03. Do you collect anything? i hate tew throw away ne of my old things =\ 04. What do you do in your spare time? chill, sleep, phone, computer, every chance i get i like bein wit my babi 05. Are you in love, or at least falling? catch me if u kan lol // NIGHT TIME // 01. What do you do before you go to bed? turn off t.v. lights and saii goodnite on the phone 02. Do you kiss your parents/guardians goodnight, or just say "goodnight"? kiss n goodnite 03. What way do you sleep (ex: on your side, tummy, etc.)? on my tummy... 04. Do you like your life? i sure do Last cigarette: yuck Last car ride: lazt nite Last kiss: fridaii nite lol Last good cry: dunt remember Last library book checked out: Aristotle Last movie seen: 2 fast 2 furious.. we didnt watch it lmao damn nikke how did u manage to flip dude... lmao Last book read: scarlet letter Last cuss word uttered: bitch Last beverage drank: milk Last food consumed: macaronie... Last crush: mii babez Last phone call: just now, davie n steph Last TV show watched: my mom is sittin next to mii watching some animal show Last time showered: dis mornin Last shoes worn: sandals Last cd played: usher Last item bought: johnny rockets Last downloaded:i dunt rem.! lonnng time ago Last annoyance: my mom tickling me uhh Last disappointment: i rather not saii Last soda drank: yesterday Last thing written: kjhsakh dunt rem. Last key used: . Last word spoken: umm? Last sleep: this morning Last im: chelz Last sexual fantasy: hmm only if u knew my dreamz =) jk Last weird encounter: i dunno Last ice cream eaten: lol hmm Last time amused: all the time Last time wanting to die: long long time Last time hugged: this morning Last time scolded: todaii my mom Last time resentful: hmm not ne time soon Last chair sat in: sitting in one right now Last lipstick used: lipqloss Last underwear worn: blak onez Last bra worn: black wun Last shirt worn: this green one Last time dancing: lazt nite Last poster looked at: dunnnno Last show attended: my friendz danz Last web page visited: mii journal post comment

::whispers:: "I'll never tell" [29 Jun 2003|12:54am] [ mood | blank ] [ music | Uranium.. I dunno the songs name but I lyke it ] babe lmao.... hehe, i'm soo bored and I havent writen in this crap in like forever . . . uhh my wrist hurts so much I went to a wedding tonite it was alot of fun. I left early though bcuz a few people were hitting on me and uhh I dont like putting myself in those situations cuz theyre never good well w/e My cuzin and I danced aloot my hair got all frizzy =/ cuz i blow dryed it. I looked weird in a dress lol I havent put one of those on in a while. It reminded me of my fatness =( well neways im bored i think i already metioned that. Oh I saw my g.f. this weekend... she went to my job fri. and yest. we went to the movies and todaii I passed by her houz =] u sayin so close yet so far well yeah i hate that... when ur with some1 and u cant like be with them that feelin is like so horrible uh hmm being doubtful <~ that doesnt happen to me, it suxz. Its like intimidation in a waii and w.e. i'll get over it big deal.. well im out i have nothing tew saii bye post comment

Patience ---- where the fuq is it at. [22 Jun 2003|06:19pm] [ mood | pissed off ] [ music | I dunno some Bachata ] my baby cuzin is soooo cute ! ! ! im at my cuzins house b.cuz todai wus one of my baby cuzins baptism and were having some party and chyt. Im sleepy cuz its raining and pissed at the same time. The rezun my subj. is patience where the fuq is it at... is meanin exactly wut it sais... I have patience I just lost it and I cant find it at this point. I hate liking some1 and at the point of going out to never see them. It's like b4 u see them ur so happie ur hopes are up and ur day is made u know if u had a bad day that just makes it awesome. Right, then here come the best part... then u cant see them something comes in the way not only just one day no no everytime ur gonna see them it happens. Gee what would ur conclusion be. This shyt is gonna keep happening. I know it prbwunt maybe once I get my car but fuq dude when u like some1 and miss them so mch its the worst combination bcuz at least me I become a bitch although it hurts especially when u think about what u've done. I dunt mean to do it but I can control myself then again its happened so much that i'm getting frusrated. Thats why I ask myself where the fuk is my patience. I went thru this with some1 and I hated it I dunt wanna go thru it again. I dunt think she knows that so she tells me well if u think this is gonna be a mission then it is. But she doesnt understan i've been thru it and it's a bitch. I'm scared of going thru the same old shyt once again. umm w.e. besides that my weekend wuz ok I went to main st. fri n sat. I saw my x fri i think i already wrote that but I saw her again yest. and my guy X he was being so stupid. He wuz like imma go see u I was like yeah ok sure. and Im like but im with my friends ok. soo he gets there and hes like all distant from my friends. Then he was gettin stupid bcuz I wasnt with him. Well duhh if ur there to see me then u might as well put up with my friends if not to bad. Fuq that crap always happens with guys.. it was happpenin to my friend nikkie too lol. Anyways we had a trip last night lmao good one nikkie <~ i like spellin ur name like that it brings bak memorys lol umm that was good flippin in a movie theater I dunno how u managed that. FAT BITCH lmao damn she wuz ugly, i ish her pussy ass woulda said something damn.....w/e well im out im not in the mood to type nemore... latez post comment

g.i.v.e. meh hEd [20 Jun 2003|11:07pm] [ mood | pensive ] [ music | these boiz screaming in the freaking backgroung ::ahhh:: ] heiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii i'm fuqen sleepie and tired and my arms hurt and this girl is pullin the dik i dunt have jump off of it plz... no its not u babe. lol i went to main st. todai and I saw mi X jessica gd i miss that punk. That made my day -=] now im talking to Dayanelis my homesliceee (nipples) lol wow so what's new in mi life wurk wurk wurk.... I've met so many ppl at wurk geez there is so many bi chicks in this world wow its incredible lol umm neways im into some1 rite now. I reallie like her but w.e. to many compliccations have been occuring therefor im having second thoughts.... but then again I know that when I have my car (meanin next week) I can see her alot more often.... I just hate the entire missing some1 thing uhh it gets to me. I was suppose to have my car by todai BUT it was raining so the auctions werent open. My dad told me if he doesnt buy me a car next thursday in tampa i get 100 bucks soo he's getting me the car........so w.e but i hate being the one to go to ppl i feel as if they dunt care cuz they dunt try or I dunnooo wat to think. grrrr okai well im out i dunt feel like typing biee bie post comment

::burppp:: [15 Jun 2003|05:39pm] [ mood | lethargic ] [ music | Many men - 50 cent ] ::yawns:: damn I'm tired... I had a fun last night. We went to the groove and did a bunch of chyt I dunt feel lyke typing it all. I rode a BIKE! that was the highlight of the nite... I thought I wuz gonna diee we went lyke 120 and I didnt have a helmet on preetttie stupid. anyways it was about 3 am soo there wus no-one on the streets.. whewww wut a feeling though it's like a craziiie rush. wow okay anyways, I worked thurs - sat. not today thank god I slept aloot yet i'm tired w/e I work at 7:45 tommorrow uhh okay besides wurk i'm at my cuzins house fathers daii woo hoo i'm havin fun. I alsi went to this chiks house this weekend it was cool my rentz lent me the car. That proved to me they trust me once again, that makes me soo happie =] ::jumps:: well i'm starting to like some1 alot.... damn, I'm pretty scared I dunt lyke ppl for the simple fact I dont wanna get hurt. been there done that and I really dont wanna go back. Yeah, I guess i'll take a risk if I do go on with this but I guess their worth my time n shyt w.e. enuff about luv...many men many many men wish death upon mee o like that song. It has a good message you just gotta pay attention. w/e my friend said I was smart lol geez righhht I just wanted to give him my insight/opinion about my curent relationship pr w/e it is and his friendship with this person. I'm lad he's open minded because he understood me. he's not ugly he's nice yet he has low self esteem <~ i cant stand that. I wish I could like go in them and show these people tha nothing is impossible they can change the way they look by excersing or what not if not just love urself for u. I'm being such a hyprocrite right now, because yeah I think i'm fat at least compared to how I was. But I luv mee and I know i'm a good person yada yada and regradless of what shyt talkers hatin me I know what i'm about and others let people like that bring them down uhh damn okaii but its not my life and I cant change them but I can try how innocent am i lol okaiiiii but w.e. I gotta go imma go eat with my fam. latez post comment

I never thought it would end... [11 Jun 2003|05:10pm] [ mood | rejuvenated ] [ music | Go0d Charlotte - The Anthem ] Finalllllllllyyyyyyy!, It's over yiipppeee! I did my hair today. I hate all this girlie crap =p Damn, but I like it. hehe Let's see I did my highlights. I did them a lighter color in order for them to stand out more. Last time I did my highlights you couldn't even see them. Afterwards, I cut my hair because that chlorine dry's it up and it was like blonde and every other color. Thats nothing new but anyways... Then I blow dryed it and wow I haven't had my hair this str8 since I use to have natrual straight hair. LoL it came out sooo preettie i'm happiee ::jumps:: lol Nikke called me today damn I miss that punk! =] Imma call her back once I get off. I wonder if she pierced her tounge kickass!! And Jessie (Cj) called me todai i felt bad coz I never talk to her and I couldn't I was in the middle of the whole hair bullshyt. hey hey its chelz graduation hehe goodluck and u too andy =] mwa mwa mwa.... I wonder if imma go to space tommorrow I dunt wanna go I can't stand that crap but i'm thinking about it, you never know. ayyy I wurk tommorrow, BUT i get paid woo hooooo! Im going to get about 700 which will be put into my car, so i'll probably have it by next fridaii -=) Dude i'm so scared of tornados damn okai I just felt the need to sai that. hmmmm okay well I have more to sai but I dunt feel like typin maybee later.... pieCce post comment

Mii firSt entryyy... [10 Jun 2003|08:19pm] [ mood | mellow ] [ music | All American Rejects - Swing ] So this is my first entry woop de dooo! ::jumps:: LoL nessa I love the name. thenx by the waii. =] mwa. Skool finishes tommorrow thats like scary. Imma be a SENIOR and I dunt like it. I already have an idea what I want out of life but I don't wanna go to college yet. ::yikess!:: I went to see 2fast2furious today it was kool. I liked the PINK car i want it!!!!! I'm gonna ask Santa for it hehe =p w/e I'm gonna work this whole summer my schedual is mon-thurs. 7:45 till 3:30 pm and fridays. 10:15 - 7:00 pm... Saturdais and Sundais off pretty fu*8en kool woo hoo. I'm getting my vrooom vroom next week. This is gonna be one interesting summer lol. (evil thoughts) <~ who knows me knows whats goin thru my mynd. I'm going to gai prom saturdai I think i'm not sure yet. If I go though I know it'll be fun, but I haven't been in the partying mood lately. I just rather chill and go to a movie. I guess that would be called a mellow mood. That's what wurk does to you!!@!! ::sings::swing swing swing lalala do u know wut it feels like being alone? I guess I do, cozz I am ALoNe. Everything is like perfeccct in my life just that whole love crap naw I havent found it. I've had a-l-0-t of chances to be with people worth my time but I simply dunt like them and it really suxz. But it's the summer time to have fun and shyt all though this is the time I get the lonelist cozz too much fun gets boring after a while. Derz some things or someone I guess I gotta see what happens by the end of the summer. Then again I'm a tad bit confused about a few things yeah concerning luvv but w.e. shyt happens. Umm i dunt even know what I wuz gonna write ne-more. It's not like neone is reading this crap but then again i'm not writing everything I feel in here "righhhht" that would be funnie.... Alright I'll write more later.... latez... post comment

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