|
| What's this...? |
[16 Apr 2003|08:03pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 loved |
] |
::walks around the room, raises an eyebrow at the notebook up on the coffee table. doesn't bother to read anything in it, simply glances around. doesn't see him and takes the pen. flips to a blank page and scribbles ( something down:: )
::sets the pen down and flexes his hand, smiles and stands up, and wanders towards the doorway. glances over his shoulder once at the chicken scratch of his hand writing, the page up, notebook open on the table, taps the doorframe twice and disappears into the next room::
|
|
| Well up... |
[14 Apr 2003|06:07am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
chipper |
] |
I got him a kitten the other day. She's really pretty. A little ragdoll with big huge blue eyes, just like his. ::smiles:: He liked it. They looked so cool, just messing with each other, scratching each other, biting each other... ::dramatic awwwwwwwwwwwww inserted right here:: It was a sight to see.
I forgot my Kodak Funflash, damn it. ::hisses:: Anyway, her name is Jasmine. And we're getting a bunny soon, too. ::grins:: Cause it's cute...
And... about Saturday... I slept through it. ::smirks::
|
|
| Friday Mornings... |
[11 Apr 2003|11:51am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 contemplative |
] |
::wakes up, blinking sleepy eyes at the clock. laughs, low and sleep raspy. rubs his eyes, pulls the blanket down and yawns wide, growling deep in his chest. pats the bed next to him, grunts when he feels no one there. mumbles::
Dumbass. Where is that bitchnut?
::grins to himself, pulls the blankets back and slowly sits up. swings his legs over the side of the bed and rests a moment, running his hands through his mussy hair. stands up and licks his lips, wandering around the suite, calls out::
Hey! Where is yo ass?
::grumbles when he hears no one around, notices the laptop on the table. grins and wanders over, opens the top of it, and logs onto the 'net. he sits down and pulls up his journal and rubs his chin for a moment, contemplating his words. cracks his knuckles and types::
I was looking at myself the other day and I realized that I am one sexy bitch. I mean, no wonder he wants me. I have a hot ass, a great smile, gorgeous hair, pretty eyes... I'm a sweet fucking package. Plus, you know, I'm Joshua Scott Chasez, and that right there is just... wow.
::laughs hard, shaking his head at himself. takes a deep breath, the laughter subsiding after a moment, rests his fingers on the keyboard again and begins to type::
Saturday. I have to see Justin on Saturday. I don't know how that is going to go. It's going to be fucking weird, you know? I haven't seen him since shit went down. Scary. I know I need to tell him and Lance about this new guy. How the fuck am I supposed to manage that shit?
I saw Lance the other day. He looked good, but I worry about him still. Justin... I worry about Justin.
I still love them both. There's no way I could have lived this long with either of them and just lost it. I love them, God knows, so much.
I just love someone else now, too. In that different way. In that "Let's buy a cat to represent me and a rabbit to represent you" kind of "Let's have a farm" kinda way.
I'm rambling. I don't know what else to say.
::pauses for a moment, turning to look out the window. exhales slowly through his nose and turns back to the computer::
I'm just scared. A big ol' fraidy cat. Heh. Isn't that something?
::clicks update and shuts the computer down. closes the top and stands up. wanders over to the nightstand and grabs a piece of paper and a pencil. stares at the hotel logo for a minute, then writes::
Hey, sexy.
I love you.
Love, me
::lays back down, yawning again, idly wondering how he could possibly be sleepy again. lays the note on the other pillow, where he will find it, and rolls onto his side, closing his eyes again, welcoming sleep::
|
|
| Random... |
[10 Apr 2003|11:14am] |
|
Sometimes, late at night, I wake up and gaze on that face, and wonder exactly what I did that I got so fucking lucky. It's the most amazing thing: those smooth cheeks, those sugar lips, those eyes moving and eyelashes fluttering, some unknown dream in that mind of his.
Sometimes, I wonder.
True beauty.
It's magnificent.
|
|
| Well... |
[08 Apr 2003|08:08am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
chipper |
] |
It went.
::laughs, and grins::
|
|
| Took A Flight... |
[05 Apr 2003|09:38pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 anxious |
] |
I'm in Florida.
Let's see how this goes...
or IF it goes...
|
|
| Guess I'm Doing Fine... |
[05 Apr 2003|01:00am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 crappy |
] |
Funny how things are so fucking fucked up. Funny how fast things get so fucking fucked up.
::sighs, staring at the phone again, for the fifth time in as many minutes::
Funny how I have this magic fucking touch. So easy for me to fuck things up.
::shakes his head, wiping at his face again::
Such a fuck up. Good job, boy. You done good.
It’s only lies that I’m living
It’s only tears that I’m crying
It’s only you that I’m losing
Guess I’m doing fine
|
|
| Hey... |
[03 Apr 2003|08:08am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 confused |
] |
They say follow your heart....
....but what if your heart doesn't know where to go?
Calling out for those lips and eyes....
....but remembering the others as well.
|
|
| Deep Thoughts... |
[28 Mar 2003|10:25am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
contemplative |
] |
...
...
...
...
:-/
Ow.
::cradles head in hands, sighs softly::
|
|
| I'd Have To Say.... |
[22 Mar 2003|01:25pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
amused |
] |
...Last night turned out to be really fucking interesting...
::slow grin::
|
|
| This. Sucks. |
[20 Mar 2003|08:54am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 bored |
] |
I'm so fucking bored.
I need a date.
Anyone up for it?
::yawns::
Let me know and shit.
|
|
| Let Me Think... |
[17 Mar 2003|07:54am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
amused |
] |
I went out last night.
Unlike SOME CERTAIN EX-BOYFRIENDS OF MINE... I can get over wallowing in self-pity long enough to have fun.
And boy, did I have fun.
::smirks::
|
|
| -Beep Beep Beep- |
[16 Mar 2003|04:19pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
lonely |
] |
ATTENTION:
Anyone who needs a quick, easy, hard fuck... no strings attached (and no pun intended)... please apply here.
Thank you. Have a nice day.
-End of Transmission-
|
|
| Fuck... |
[14 Mar 2003|08:02pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
crushed |
] |
::stares at the ring on his finger for a long while, trying to keep his breathing calm, trying to block out his thoughts, the pain. shifts his gaze to the floor, unblinking, numb. slowly slides the ring off his finger, pushes off the chair and walks towards his dresser. pulls out the ring box. kisses the ring and puts it in its place, then tucks the small velvet box into the dresser drawer. closes it and drags his feet back to the chair, sits down, sighing heavily, wiping at the tears on his face::
I take the blame.
I suppose this kind of thing happens to whores like me.
::closes his eyes and leans his head back. rests his arms over his eyes, blocking out any light, and silently cries himself to sleep::
|
|
| WTF? |
[11 Mar 2003|02:24pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
lonely |
] |
::lifts his head, blinking at the lights as they blink back at him, scratches his cheek. looks up at the recording engineer, who's staring at him with an eyebrow raised::
Just a nap.
Let's get back to work.
::rubs his eyes tiredly, looks back down at the panel, and presses some buttons, drowning in work to try and forget his lonliness::
|
|
|
[09 Mar 2003|05:28pm] |
|
Well my happy ass has been locked up in the studio a lot. Which makes my ass not so happy cause it means I haven't had a chance to see my boys. Which I hope will change soon cause I miss them.
|
|
| Well... |
[28 Feb 2003|07:08pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
good |
] |
So the Grammy's rocked. I loved my shirt. ::grins::
I can't believe we got a standing ovation. Man... I've... ::shakes head slowly:: I was really blown away. ::smiles warmly:: That was really fucking awesome.
Justin and Lance... rawr. ::laughs:: Did you guys see Lance? Didn't he look amazing?
And JUSTIN! Heh. Wow.
Anyway, I'm just around and about. Say hey sometimes. Yep. ::nods::
Anddon'tmakefunofmyhair.Iloveit.
::winks::
|
|
| Well Now... |
[22 Feb 2003|07:43pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
excited |
] |
Yay! ::hops around::
WE ARE ALL GONNA BE TOGETHER ON SUNDAY!
This fucking ROCKS!
::grins widely::
|
|
| One Two Three Four... |
[17 Feb 2003|11:39pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 naughty |
] |
...Happy Days!
::grins::
I called TRL today. Talked some about the new album. Whoo for music. I can't wait for all of us to get together to make music again. Solo shit is great, goes well, what the fuck ever... but still.
I kinda miss us as a whole.
Even if I get to make my own kind of music with two members of my band...
::dirty little laugh::
|
|
|
[11 Feb 2003|08:25am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
cheerful |
] |
::yawns and stretches, blinks sleepily at the clock. grins and stands and goes into the bathroom. washes his face and brushes his teeth, waking up. walks back into the bathroom and pulls on some jeans and a tshirt, slips on his flipflops and his jacket. grabs his keys and wallet and walks downstairs. shakes sleep messy hair out of his face and walks into the living room. turns on the stereo, knowing it'll piss Justin and Lance off and plays Hanson's "MMMBop" at full blast. giggles and leaves the house, snickering as he goes to pick up breakfast for the three of them::
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