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mood |
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tired |
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music |
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So Yesterday - Hilary Duff |
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*For the record: I don't like Hilary Duff. The song is stuck in my head. Torture.
I haven't been able to update in a few days because I've been having backpains. I'm getting old. Actually my school nurse said it might be my kidney. Nice. It hurts to sit in the chair I'm in right now. I promised my mom that if she took me to the library so I could update my journal, I would go to school tomorrow. Dammit. The things I do to express my feelings.
I called my father and asked if I could have, not borrow, 7 dollars for saturday night. My friend from West (the school I transferred from) asked if I wanted to go see Godspell at West with her. It's 7 dollars to get in and guess what! My dad said he would give it to me! I know $7 doesn't seem like much, but coming from him it just seems so... generous. So I'm really excited to see all the Western Folk there yonder. Ashley ran down the halls in school the other day yelling "Robin's coming back!". And people actually care! lol. Jarid, Lauren, Matt, and Jessica are among the few people who are gonna be there. Plus Ashley said maybe we could go visit just seeing as how he just lives down the street. Actually, she didn't say that. I haven't asked yet. But, she'll go for it. She loves me.
I haven't seen or talked to Lauren since I left West the last day of school last year. I miss her so much. My blackie. When we met in 9th grade we hated eachother from the very beginning. She took me aside and told me not to stress, that nobody likes her at first because she's mean to everyone, but they learn to like her. Whatever. I never thought we would get along. It got really bad to the point where I would cry and dread going to Science; the only class I had with her. I talked to the teacher and the teacher said she would switch her seat with someone on the other side of the room. I got really excited but the teacher switched her with my arch enemy at the time, Caitlin. I used to be friends with Caitlin in Kindergarten. We would fight at least twice a week and we were friends on and off all the way up to 6th grade when we completely stopped talking. When the teacher moved her next to me, we just clicked. We really got to know eachother and we had so much in common. Our little Science gang was me, Caitlin, Jason, and Lisa. Lisa was really alternative, still is, heavy black eyeliner and mascara, black clothes, Rob Zombie (rocks), and we became fast friends. As of right now Lisa is one of my closest buds. Jason was my little prep bro. We talked on the phone every night. My goal was to be best friends with Lisa and Jason, have that a crazy friendship triangle. That didn't go according to plan. I found out last year that they hate eachother. Anyway, back to Lauren. She became friends with Caitlin and moved back to where she used to sit, and that's when we became friends. We both liked Tina from S Club 7 and decided to make a religion where she was our God lol. Tina Ann Barrett. And we called ourselves TAB. Tabish was the religion. TAB sisters :-) <3. Last year, Lauren and I were so close that we would skip down the hallways hand-in-hand singing "Blackee and Jew! Blackee and Jew! No me Dios (sp?) Blackee and Jew!". Those were our code names. I miss my blackee. I love racism.
This is going to be the longest journal entry ever~
Josh. Joshua Simmons was in about 5 out of 8 of my classes in 9th grade and I never talked to him. I didnt even know I had classes with him ever until last year. Last year was when I met Candice. She trasferred to West from some school in Smithfield. She started dating Josh so I decided I should be friends with my friends boyfriend. He was in my gym class, health class, and one of my studies. He must have been the sweetest guy I had ever met. We played a game where the guy has to name 13 girls and he said "Danielle". (he put me first by the way). Andrew goes "ew! she has a mustache!", and Josh said "so what! She's nice." Then he named another girl and Andrew said "she's ugly!" and Josh said "She's nice!" and Andrew said "but she's fat!" so Josh said "I dont care! She's really funny" Andrew said "Would you date her?!" And Josh said "yes. She's really nice." Wow. I never thought I'd hear such words. So one day Andrew was absent, and it was just Josh and I. I really got to know him and he was amazing. I started to really like him. I didn't want to, but I couldn't help it. He's about 5'7", with a shaved head, amazing, gorgeous, beautiful blue eyes, really athletic. He plays basketball, baseball, and football. I couldn't wait for Candice to break up with him. Mean, I know, but I couldn't wait. She came up to me in homeroom and showed me her phone book. I flipped toward the "s" section, you know, for Simmons. She pointed and said "look! there's Josh!" and turned around. "um, I don't care" I said. I memorized the number real quick and when I was sure she wasn't looking I wrote it down. They went out for about 3 months. She came into school tired looking, and she looked like she had been crying. "Josh dumped me" she said. "REALLY!?!" I said, way too excited, all but sympathetic. "that's um, are you all right?" I added. Yea, so I wanted to tell him I liked him, but I didnt want to ruin my friendship with Candi. Candice finally got over their breakup and I told her how I felt about him. She was... happy. She thought it was great and she told me she'd talk to him. Well, she never did and he had gotten another girlfriend before I had a chance to talk to him. He had a ton of girlfriends since Candice. It seemed he hadn't been single for more than 2 days in a row so I gave up. He went out with a girl named Lisa (not my Lisa), for about a month. That ended and when I realized he had been single for more than a week I thought 'this is my chance!'. I was about to tell him and he handed me a picture. It was a freshman I had seen around. "who's this?" I aked. "my girlfriend" he said smiling. So that was that. I figured it wouldn't last. Wouldn't you know, they've been together almost a year. It's never going to end. I got kicked out of West for not being in the school district and getting bad grades and I'm probably never going to see Josh again. That's the story of my life.
I'm going to call my aunt tonight and see if she will let me use her address to go back to West. I'll tell you what happens tomorrow.
On another note, I met a guy named Brendan. He's really funny and it's scary how much we have in common. We're supposed to see a Hockey game next week, maybe. I hope we do. We'll see how that goes.
Wish my luck on everything! :-)
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