Bugster's Blurty
 
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Below are the 17 most recent journal entries recorded in Bugster's Blurty:

    Monday, December 6th, 2004
    8:18 am
    Hi
    Wow it's been a long time since I have written in this journal but i'm writing now and it's ok.And i'm ok.I finally hooked up with someone descent.Well from what I know of him so far he's a descent guy.But he's really nice and i'm gonna get to see him later and I am going to be so happy.I am making myself sound like a duf so ttyl with <3 Red

    Current Mood: happy
    8:18 am
    Hi
    Wow it's been a long time since I have written in this journal but i'm writing now and it's ok.And i'm ok.I finally hooked up with someone descent.Well from what I know of him so far he's a descent guy.But he's really nice and i'm gonna get to see him later and I am going to be so happy.I am making myself sound like a duf so ttyl with <3 Red

    Current Mood: happy
    8:15 am
    Hi
    Wow it's been a long time since I have written in this journal but i'm writing now and it's ok.And i'm ok.I finally hooked up with someone descent.Well from what I know of him so far he's a descent guy.But he's really nice and i'm gonna get to see him later and I am going to be so happy.I am making myself sound like a duf so ttyl with <3 Red

    Current Mood: happy
    8:05 am
    Hi
    Wow it's been a long time since I have written in this journal but i'm writing now and it's ok.And i'm ok.I finally hooked up with someone descent.Well from what I know of him so far.But he's really nice and i'm gonna gat to see him later and I am going to be so happy.I am making myself sound like a duf so ttyl with <3 Red

    Current Mood: happy
    Thursday, November 25th, 2004
    1:22 pm
    Hi wazz up??
    Yep i'm here at my house. Without a boyfriend. Yea it suxs. But watever. You know wat also suks I thought I had stopped with the cutting but I guess I have'nt because i'm still doing it. But you know what the funny part is, it's the fact that I was fine until the KID,ok he's older that me but the way he acts makes him a kid, I was trying to hook up with decides to fuck with my head and tell me that he's not still going out with her but yet wait now why have like 20 people told me that he is and when he was in ny I finally asked him again if it's true and he said yea it is so you know what I am going to give you some advice, dont go out with the people you really want to because they always hurt you no matter what he case is you always get hurt,always. well gtg <3 ya guys bye and happy thanx given toodles

    Current Mood: annoyed
    Current Music: 3 doors down
    1:04 pm
    wazz up??
    Yep it's thanx givin and i'm at home without a boyfriend. Damn this suxs. Why is it that the guys you really think you want always end up being assholes? Damn life suxs. Well at least for me. You know, I thought I had stopped for good but I guess I didn't, if you are wondering what i'm talking about I am talking about cutting myself. Everything was going good until I find out that the guy I was trying to get with was still with his chick which I thought he had broken up with her cuz he kept telling me no but you know what from now on because of him I dont think I am going to trust any guy again. How do you know what people you can trust you know what i'm not going to trust anyone anymore. I am just going to start being a loner because I can't take this shit. I can't take being lied to. I can't stand being broken hearted all the time. I just need to stop looking for a boyfriend and let them find me. So whatever see ya lata <3 ya guys

    Current Mood: annoyed
    Current Music: papa roach
    Tuesday, November 23rd, 2004
    8:36 pm
    Kool
    Hey waz up? Well I did it. I got over the fact of being scared to tell him and unlike any other guy he actually took it very well. And as far as I can tell he isn't mad about the whole fact of me doing that to him so im happy about that.Well im tired of writing so toodles <3 ya guys c-ya

    Current Mood: relieved
    3:13 pm
    Um yea................
    What to do? What to do? I have no idea what to do because Im going out with him(currently)but I guess im not happy with it but you know what it's saving me from going back out with my ex and it's also making him happy beyond no reason. But I cant do this anymore. I can't keep letting him think that I like him like that so I guess what I am going to do will kill me and hurt his and my feelings with each other. But I cant keep going out with him and making myself feel like this any longer. well gtg toodles

    Current Mood: sad
    Wednesday, November 17th, 2004
    5:48 pm
    I can't believe it
    OMG it's completely true I heard it from out of her mouth cuz robert asked "are you going out with eddy still and she said yea we never broke up" when I heard that I almost went crazy.But what can you do when guys are assholes?well gtg toodles <3 ya

    Current Mood: stressed
    3:09 pm
    I hate this shit man every fucking thing I do is wrong.And everywhere I try to go is "Who's going, where are you gunna be, when are you coming home, dont be home late" I guess that's why I am resulting to cutting again. But nobody even really cares what I do to myself. I mean they do but they don't whatever what can you do? Why am I always the one to suffer in this family I really do want to stop but I just can't it's like my nature or something.One other thing I can't stop is smoking I just cant quit on anything not smoking, not drinking, not anything.Well ima stop babbling now who ever reads this <3 ya bye.

    Current Mood: pissed off
    Tuesday, November 16th, 2004
    10:53 pm
    Hate the world
    I hate my family,well at least the ones I live with.Is it that bad to smoke dude no it's not see but im smart I just keep denying it and they cant prove it cuz I dont do it around my house.But I hate them all dude seriously.I always think about running away but then I ask myself "what about school, what about where you would live, what would I eat you know shit like that and the only thing that is really holding me back is the fact that my dad has lost so much already I dont think he'll make it if he looses another person that he loves. I hate my life I wish I would die things would be so much better if I where dead then I would'nt have to go through all this bullshit about whether someone is actually going to ask me out and if he ever will. It's total fucking bullshit but that's not even what's making me want to kill myself it'sthe people I live with.I hate everyone I just wanna die and get it over with maybe I will slit my wrists again maybe more gashy than before.Maybe I should attemt to kill myself with one of the slits it would be alot better but you know what i'm going to go if I cut I cut if I dont I dont see you lata <3 ya

    Current Mood: contemplative
    Current Music: 3 doors down
    Monday, November 15th, 2004
    6:43 am
    Waaaaaaaaaaaa..................
    I hate this shit man I just wish that one fucking day I could go without haveing to hear that the guy im practically going out with might still be going out with that ex of his but see one day somebody will be like oh there here together then I ask him and he's still going out with her and he's like no im not going out with her then the next day shes hanging out with him what the fuck man im so sick of this bullshit ok you know what ima make you a deal ima ask him wat the deal is and if he tells me that hes not going out with her then i'll be like well what's going on with us then? and when he tells me my answer ima make a response to what I have to say well gtg I'll let you know what happens lata see ya

    Current Mood: frustrated
    Sunday, November 14th, 2004
    10:33 pm
    too much
    What I have to go through everyday is way to much I sit here being put through shit but see there is this one person that I've always had really strong feelings for, and he doesn't know this but the thing is that I dont really wanna go out with him because I dont wanna ruin my relationship with him as a friend so that basically what I feel is alot more than I can express,and he helps me with all of my problems.ttyl

    Current Mood: confused
    Wednesday, November 10th, 2004
    3:14 pm
    I can't believe this
    I just found some things out.The guy I've been crushing over for the longest time is still going out with his sopposibly ex(which he told me he broke up with her).See I wouldn't be making this a big deal besides the fact that when we went out sunday and we came back to my house and smoked and then started to make out for the rest of the night we completely acted like a couple.But theses past couple of days he was acting weird but so was I so it could just be me but from my point of view he was acting weird.I need help somebody plz write me back and help me on this

    Current Mood: depressed
    Current Music: My sleep mix
    Tuesday, November 9th, 2004
    8:30 pm
    OMG
    This is so stupid.I hate the way I feel when I'm like this.I just wish I can be happy for once in my life again.See I would be happy if Eddy would actually call me when he says he will or when I ask him to.But see he could just be busy like he says.I shouldn't even be tripin over it cuz he never officially asked me out yet so wateva.But I just need to get a grip and quit acting like this.Well gtg peace everyone
    Monday, November 8th, 2004
    9:27 pm
    um yea
    this sux,life sux,doesn't everything suk,well I think it does so watever,I just try so hard to keep everything bottled inside that I begin to blow with everything bottled inside of me which is alwayz sayin let me out but I don't let it so it makes me keep it inside.I think that's why I drink and smoke but thats all about to stop because I realize that it's effecting the way I look at things and people but maybe I won't quit but at least attempt to slow down but wateva ima stop babbling now so luv alwayz jitterbugz

    Current Mood: annoyed
    Current Music: really loud and screamin music
    8:40 am
    Blah
    ok yea I've just joined this site journal thing and I don't kno wat im doing so yeay

    Current Mood: blah
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