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♪ Summer Sunshine

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[21 Aug 2004|11:26am]
[ mood | annoyed ]

I cried myelf to sleep last night because lately I haven't been able to sleep. I haven't felt well at all. Maybe going back to school is going to be a good thing for me after all. Or maybe that is the reason why I can't sleep. The test scares me.

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[09 Aug 2004|04:17pm]
[ mood | confused ]

I've been wanting to update on here but I haven't been able to translate my thoughts into words. All I have is little fragments of all the stuff going on inside my head. Why do things have to be so complicated?

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[08 Aug 2004|04:51pm]


In 1983 (the year you were born)


Ronald Reagan is president of the US


Sally Ride becomes the first American woman to travel in space


Marines are killed when a TNT laden suicide terrorists blows up Marine headquarters at Beirut International Airport


US Marines and Rangers invade the island of Grenada and evacuate hundreds of US citizens


The Soviets shoot down Korean Airlines flight 007


The Internet Domain Name System was invented by Paul Mockapetris


Ronald Wilson Reagan signs a bill creating Martin Luther King Day


Baltimore Orioles win the World Series


Washington Redskins win Superbowl XVII


New York Islanders win the Stanley Cup


Return of the Jedi is the top grossing film


"Every Breath You Take" by The Police spends the most time at the top of US charts


The A-Team and Webster premiere
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[06 Jul 2004|03:15pm]
[ mood | sad ]

I wish I had a best friend :'(

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[02 Jul 2004|08:26pm]
[ mood | happy ]

Back once more. To sumarize what has been going on .... I went to Rockport with Timur 3 weeks ago. The house was nice. Then I went to Kansas the following week. The trip was an adventure. Nothing I'd ever expect. Rain, insects, tall grass, dew, wind, cold, rain, and storms. I came home safe though. I'll write more in detail about it some other time. I'm babysitting Andy and Ashley and just hanging out when there's time. I went to see Spider Man last night. It was awesome. The night before I saw American History X and that was the best movie I've seen all of last year and this year. I mean, it was the best. I got pissed off at Timur last night because of two things. One I can't say and the second, he asked how I was going to work if I didn't have a work permit. That was a real stupid question. The stupidest I've ever heard him say. It pissed me off. Then when he went home and I called him because I couldn't sleep he only said a few words and fell asleep on the phone. I could've gone to his house and strangled him. That's all. I went fishing the whole evening today. Caught a sunburn and a few mosquito bites. Bleh.

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[09 Jun 2004|09:54am]
LLucky
AAwesome
UUnusual
RRefined
AAmbivalent

Name / Username:


Name Acronym Generator
From Go-Quiz.com
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[03 Jun 2004|08:45am]
guys dont take me off your friends lists. I dont update or leave comments cause my internet account got canceled =(
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[04 May 2004|12:45pm]
I'm done with OB theory forever. It wasn't so bad but too much of it was starting to do things to me. The other night I had a nightmare where my mother had a baby and brought it home. I was so busy doing homework I didn't even come out to go see it. Later mom asked me to go get it while she took a nap because she was tired from labor (see what I mean?). I went to the living room where my father left it on the couch. I looked at it and it looked like a cabbage patch doll :)
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[04 May 2004|11:19am]
[ mood | bouncy ]

It's amazing what coffee can do. I drank only three cups and only got three hours of sleep at most. Quarter til three and I thought I'd never fall asleep. The sleep was light. I was awakened by the sound of nothing with exhaustion and heart palpitations. Normally my breathing and heartbeats feel to go at the same rhythm together. Systole with inhalation, diastole with exhalation ... but this morning it felt out of wack. My heart racing at 1000/hr. My respirations below 12. The scary thing is, I was not even sleepy just tired. I had my final this morning. I didn't think it was so bad.

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[03 May 2004|11:44am]
Woodstock



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[03 May 2004|11:35am]
Get to know the REAL you by crash_and_burn
Your Name
You Are A:Dreamer
Your Favorite Band/SongLinkin Park - My December
You Like To Read:Classic literature
You Firmly Believe In:Nudity
Everyone Thinks You Are:A cheap bastard
You Were Conceived:In a burning building
You Will Marry:A homeless man/woman
Created with the ORIGINAL MemeGen!
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[19 Apr 2004|02:09pm]
[ mood | crushed ]

I cried myself to sleep last night because the world is a very sad place. I felt so sad .. extremely sad .. it wasn't even reasonable or explainable. I hadn't cried since Pedi. But I cried because I felt so sad.

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[08 Apr 2004|01:23am]
[ mood | enthralled ]

I am so very much in love. All I want to do is dream and go be happy. I'm doing my OB rotation right now. I don't like it. OB is so bad. Poor Joe had to do his postpartum assessment yesterday and assess for lochia and do a breast palpation. Poor Joe. It was a very traumatic experience. Poor patient too. Poor things. Yesterday I met a guy. He's a student at HCC going to the RN prog. at San Jact next spring. We exchanged phones and he called yesterday and asked me out Friday. My goodness. I told him no. Of course I could never. First of all I have heard many terrible things about those men .... they like to cheat on their wife. They also want women to be their slaves and clean and cook and be submissive. Then he is too tall and too old. But the biggest most important thing is that I am already in love with somebody else. He is one of the best things and I consider myself lucky. I mean, I never even could dream about meeting a guy like him.

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[01 Apr 2004|10:19am]
[ mood | chipper ]

OB is so boring. I could die. At the transition nursery all you do is clean poop, feed, bathe, and burp babies .. and the babies all look alike to add boredom to your day there. Then one starts crying and they all start crying. Then more babies keep coming in and you keep receiving them and cleaning poop, giving baths, taking their measurements. It's boring. It's so boring. The High Risk Nursery is the exact same thing, except boredom is twice as bad. Then Triage center is even worse. At the triage women just come in complaining of contractions. All you do is lay them in bed and put the monitors on their belly and listen to the babie's heart rate ... the whole day. At postpartum you do assessments, charting, palpating bellies, massaging funduses, and looking at perineal pads for foul odors and clots and nasty things like that. grOss. OB is so gross. OB is a job for boring nurses. I would never go do OB.

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[30 Mar 2004|06:34am]
[ mood | tired ]

It was so grOss. Sun called me this morning to wake me up. I said ok and went right back to sleep. Then a little later my aunt's husband comes in holding a cream and asked me to give him a back massage. I was like what? O_o First of all I was still sleeping. I told him to go buy a heating pad. He insisted and took off his shirt and the only thing he was wearing was his boxers. He told me where and how to do it. He said "start from here .. and then go here, and then go down and then here to the sides" and then what, rub your butt? It was insane. I mean, I know men. What do you think?? a man, a woman, alone, early in the morning, with male testosterone peaking above the celiling, and a back massage? It doesn't sound right to me. I told him to lay on the couch. He kept complaining that it was too soft and squeequie. So then what, you wanna go to the room?? Hellllllllllllllllllllllll NO. Then mommy called and asked if I'd already gone to school. I told him "Look (dirty old man) I gotta go to school. Buy a heat pad. Bye" and got the hell out of that place. That's crazy. He asked if I would have breakfast. Yeah right. No thank you. I'll go to school on an empty tummy and feel sick and starve.

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[12 Mar 2004|10:51am]
[ mood | hungry ]

Last night I had a full glass of prune juice ... bad idea. I thought I my body would just dehydrate itself to death in the bathroom. I mean, after a few minutes I even felt dizzy, lightheaded, and weak. I thought of seizures and fluid and electrolyte imbalance and all these bad things. It was so bad. I didn't even keep studying. I just had a sip of water and went to bed.

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[11 Mar 2004|06:40pm]
[ mood | scared ]

I didn't want to get out of bed today. I don't even want to go take a bath. I went to see Jennifer at the hospital yesterday and she is worse than I could have ever imagined. I mean, I wasn't expecting to see what I saw. I once saw a woman who was dying of AIDS at Bentaub. The CNA asked me to help her clean her and I didn't really want to. I knew that I wasn't going to catch it but just seeing the woman through the window or replaying the image in my head gave me chills. It was so ugly. I had never seen anything like it. I told the CNA that I didn't have the time b.c I had to get ready to leave. She got mad and said "You don't want to help someone who is dying"? (In my head: Not really. That's your job, not mine) and it sounds cruel but hey, I wasn't lying. I really had to go and that woman was so scarry. I mean, I knew that death was standing at her bedside ready to take her at any time. I was just avoiding such ugly experience. I am too young and don't want to know anything about death. I know it could get me any minute but I'd rather just avoid the subject. I also knew that all the woman's secretions contained the virus and even just a drop would have made me paranoid. I know that if I'm careful there is just no way of getting it but better be on the safe side. What if some bad person pricked her w/a needle and left the needle somewhere to be lost in the bed? I think I've watched too much tv. But anything is possible. But anyway, I couldn't get away from this one. I just had to go inside and get her cleaned up. It was so scarry. The room was freezing and she was so cold and stiff. Every time that I moved her she moaned as if she had been in pain (but she wasn't because she wasn't taking any medication and didn't have any IV fluids going) Her body was so stiff. I tried to stretch her extremities but they were so stiff it was almost a work out for me. she just went back to her scrunched up position. She must not have had any family because her room was dull and empty .. no flowers, no cards, no calls, no visits. For days, I had just walked by the room and occasionally glanced through the window. Then I went back to my responsibilities and forgot about her. Not at any time, did someone give her a visit and no one ever went in the room. None of the nursing students on the floor from my school, HCC, or Prairie View ever took her as a patient. I wonder what she must have done to die like that. I mean, she had got to be paying for something. Her name was Maria. Must've been in her early 30s. She was so skinny and wasted she looked like a skeleton with dry skin glued to the bones. Her eye orbits were sunken and she looked like she had come right out of the holocaust. Rigor mortis grabbed every inch of her body while she was still alive. It was so horrible. It was so gloomy. I just wanted to get out.

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[10 Mar 2004|03:37pm]
[ mood | happy ]

Extroverted (E) 69.44% Introverted (I) 30.56%
Realistic (S) 63.64% Imaginative (N) 36.36%
Intellectual (T) 50% Emotional (F) 50%
Organized (J) 57.5% Easygoing (P) 42.5%
Your type is: ESFJ
You are a Supporter, possible professions include - nurse, social worker, caterer, flight attendant, bookkeeper, medical/dental assistant, exercise physiologist, elementary school teacher, minister/priest/rabbi, retail owner, officer manager, telemarketer, counselor, special education teacher, merchandise planner, credit counselor, athletic coach, insurance agent, sales representative, massage therapist, medical secretary, child care provider, bilingual education teacher, professional volunteer.
Take Free Career Inventory Personality Test
personality tests by similarminds.com
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[10 Mar 2004|10:48am]
[ mood | sick ]

Blah

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[08 Mar 2004|10:55pm]
[ mood | sick ]

I feel like I have increased craneal pressure. My head hurts, I'm having shallow respirations, I feel nauseated, short of breath, dizzy, tired, lethargic, and I'm having palpitations. I think I better go to sleep.

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[08 Mar 2004|02:41am]
[ mood | scared ]

I did something bad. I did something bad :X

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[05 Mar 2004|12:37pm]
Steps To Happiness



Everybody Knows:
You can't be all things to all people.
You can't do all things at once.
You can't do all things equally well.
You can't do all things better than everyone else.
Your humanity is showing just like everyone else's.

So:
You have to find out who you are, and be that.
You have to decide what comes first, and do that.
You have to discover your strengths, and use them.
You have to learn not to compete with others,
Because no one else is in the contest of *being you*.

Then:
You will have learned to accept your own uniqueness.
You will have learned to set priorities and make decisions.
You will have learned to live with your limitations.
You will have learned to give yourself the respect that is due.
And you'll be a most vital mortal.

Dare To Believe:
That you are a wonderful, unique person.
That you are a once-in-all-history event.
That it's more than a right, it's your duty, to be who you are.
That life is not a problem to solve, but a gift to cherish.
And you'll be able to stay one up on what used to get you down.

(Author Unknown)
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[04 Mar 2004|01:13pm]
[ mood | hungry ]

I had some weird dreams about three days ago. I had the first one the day before my theory final. I fell asleep for a few minutes in my bed and started having this dream. In it I was at TCH pulling a wagon that had dead body parts in it. I mostly remember only seeings small arms and legs covered under military clothes ... kinda like Tim's jacket. Then one of the nurses came and asked if I could please get rid of the wagon. In a happy mood I told her "Yeah, sure" and she told me that if anybody stopped me on the way, just to have them call her at TCH and she'd explain. So I did and pulled the wagon all the way to my car. I put it in my trunk and came to a place where the ground was split in half. The gap between both sides must've been about three feet. I put some boards down on boths sides to be able to cross. The front part of the car made it to the other half but the back side fell in the gap. So I came out to look for someone who could help me get the car out. I found a soldier who came and pushed it out but asked to search me. He asked me what I was doing with those body parts. I told him to call the hospital and pulled out a bunch of paper work trying to find the number. The amount of paper work was massive so the soldier just told me to keep going. So I did and came by a small house that was only a room and only had three walls. Since there was no wall I just stepped in and found a young guy. The guy asked me if I needed help getting those body parts to their destination. I didn't feel like I did but I asked him to help anyway. I had left the car some where behind. I told him that I'd get the wagon for him and I'd go get my car. He called me a princess. I felt good ... b.c no one has said anything like that in a long time. I wish I had finished dreaming it. The second dream happened the next day early in the morning (maybe 5:00). I was at a woman's house .... which looked more like a shack made of wood. I was with someone else. I can't remember who it was though. I think it was my cousin Cecia though. We came to do some job related to nursing for this woman. It was a lot of work and when we talked to her the work and the schedule didn't seem fair. She didn't say anything about the pay but the schedule is what discouraged us. We had to be there and do something in the morning and wait about a whole hour doing nothing but we couldn't leave the place and take a break or eat or do anything .. just sit there. Then after this hour we had to do more work the whole day until she decided to let us go. It was as if we were begging for a piece of bread. We didn't like it. We were helping her more than she'd be helping us. Not only that, we didn't have the need to work. So when she stepped out we planed that we would leave after the morning work and let her see how she'd come out of it on her own. We wouldn't even tell her. We'd just sneak out and not come back. So after a while when she wasn't around we escaped through the door. Outside we came to a place very full of people. Nobody knew us and nobody talked to us. Everyone was minding their own business. We came to a place that looked kinda like a court building and among all these people, there was this one that looked like Satan in the movie the Passion. He was thin and tall and wore a long black robe. I looked at his face and he didn't have one. I felt so scared. He didn't have any eyes or mouth or anything. He was so ugly. So we walked away from this guy but he followed us. There was another faceless person following us too. This other person was short though. When we'd stop, they stopped and stared at us. It was so scary. They didn't come close to us .. but followed us and stopped to stare. ::shivers:: it was so freaky. It woke me up.

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[04 Mar 2004|10:18am]
[ mood | happy ]

On the evaluation I wrote that Ms. Jones needs to work on her time management because she always kept us extra time and let us out late. She was often late to conference. Then student evaluation day comes and she tells me that I need to work on my time management. Whaaaaat?? O_o what are you talking about time management??

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[02 Mar 2004|12:02am]
[ mood | happy ]

FIRSTS
First best friends: Osler and Claudia
First real memory of something: First day of Pre - K
First Job: Never worked
First screen name: Dogfude4u
First funeral: A lady everybody called "grandma"
First pet: a fish
First piercing/tattoo: earlobes
First credit card: Verizon
First love: Isaac
First enemy: Some girl from the 4th grade but I won her over.
First concert: In 6th grade .. my own

LASTS
Last big car ride: Our trip to NY
Last good cry: I can't remember
Last library book: 5 Love Languages
Last movie seen: The Passion
Last beverage drank: Whiskey
Last food consumed: Meat with peas potatos and carrots
Last crush: Uhm .. Tim?
Last phone call: Nora
Last TV show watched: Can't remember
Last time showered: Yesterday
Last shoes worn: The black ones
Last cd played: Worship Music
Last item bought: I can't remember
Last ice cream eaten: Sometime last year
Last shirt worn: Pooh bear

LAYER ONE:
-- Name: Laura
-- Birth date: Jan 16
-- Current Location: Texas
-- Hair Color: Brown
-- Height: 5'0
-- Weight: Xlbs.
-- Righty or Lefty: Right

LAYER TWO:
-- Your heritage: Spanish
-- The shoes you wore today: The same ones
-- Your weakness: -- Love, chocolate
-- Goal you'd like to achieve: Graduate, work, and help the parents and anobody else

LAYER THREE:
-- Your thoughts first waking up: ((aLaRm gOeS ofF - 7:00am)) ... Ugh 10 more minutes ::hit snooze button:: ::ZzZzZzZzZ zZzZzZzZz ... start dreaming ... ((aLaRm gOes oFf)) ::hit button:: ZzZzZzZz ... ((aLaRm again))It's 7:30am. huh?? what?? 7:30?!! O_o? SHIIIIIT!!!
-- Your best physical feature: Hair?
-- Your bedtime: Anytime before 1:00am
-- Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Neither
-- Chocolate or vanilla: Vanilla
-- Cappuccino or coffee: Cappuccino

LAYER FIVE:
-- Smoke: Not in so long
-- Cuss: Not in so long
-- Sing: On my way home
-- Take a shower everyday: Yeah
-- Do you think you've been in love: Yeah
-- Want to go to college: I go right now

Layer Six:
-- Liked high school: Half the time
-- Want to get married: Yeah
-- Believe in yourself: Yeah
-- Get motion sickness: Yeah ... yuck
-- Think you're attractive: Average
-- Get along with your parent(s): Yeah
-- Like thunderstorms: Love them
-- Play an instrument: The flute .. how lame

LAYER SIX: ...
In the 6 past months...
-- Drank alcohol: Yes
-- Smoked: Nope
-- Done a drug: No
-- Had Sex: No
-- Made Out: Yes
-- Gone on a date: Yeah
-- Gone to the mall: Yeah
-- Eaten sushi: No
-- Been on stage: No
-- Gone skating: No
-- Dyed your hair: Yes
-- Stolen anything: Never.

LAYER SEVEN: Have you ever:
-- Been caught "doing something": Not really
-- Shop Lifted: Never
-- Changed who you were to fit in: Never

LAYER EIGHT:
-- Age you hope to be married: Maybe someday
-- Numbers and Names of Children: 3
-- Describe your Dream Wedding: I haven't dreamt it yet
-- How do you want to die: Without pain
-- Where you want to go to college: I go to San Jac. If I had known I'd be at Lee.
-- What do you want to be when you grow up: HaPpY!!
-- What country would you most like to visit: Mine

LAYER NINE:
In a boy... or girl:
-- Best eye color?: Hazel, green, brown, black
-- Best hair color?: Black
-- Short or long hair? don't matter
-- Height: Short
-- Best weight: Thin

LAYER TEN:
-- # of people I could trust with my life: 0
-- # of CDs that I own: 5
-- # of piercings: 2
-- # of tattoos: 0
-- # of scars on my body: 0
-- # of things in my past that I regret: 2

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[22 Feb 2004|05:17pm]
[ mood | anxious ]

I'm 21 now ... I could buy some alcohol. I don't know which one to buy. Or maybe wine?? How's wine? Which one? what kind? How much alcohol does it have to have (percentage). I would do anything to sleep. I've never slept. I remember suffering from insomnia at only 7. I'd also take anything not to feel anything. Anti anxiety drugs ... sedatives ... muscle relaxants ... Valium ... my mom used to have Valium. Now it's all gone.

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[22 Feb 2004|04:13pm]
[ mood | angry ]

I have been majorly depressed since Wednesday. Wednesday just sucked big time and it was stupid. All I did was stay at the library and read. Somedays I can barely make it ... others I'd rather just be dead ... and others I can't stop admiring the world I live in. Most of the time I wish that I didn't live in it. My dad just makes it worse. My dad is a master at making you feel like you deserve to rot alive and die. According to him everything that happens is because I haven't gone to church and right now I must be heading to hell. Today he mentioned that I'm not a Christian. My mother defended me by saying that I am "lukewarm." No one but God knows my heart for anyone to look at me and open their big mouths to criticize. Only he knows and he knows that I have had the best intentions. He knows that all I want is to feel loved, filled, and happy. He knows that I am lonely. He knows that I am sad. He knows that my heart is aching .... he knows that these are the reasons why I live life the way that I do. I am a dissapointment. I know it. No one should need to point it out. Only he knows that I wanted to be a nurse to be doing something that maybe would please him. Before I graduated I asked him to let me do something where I could help others. Yesterday I woke up sick as a dog nauseated and anorexic the whole day. I could've died. I didn't hear one single word from Tim the whole day. I called in the morning and he never returned the call. Later in the evening I called him three times and left a message. He called back saying that he was busy cooking. Right ... and it's gonna keep you so busy that you won't even get a minute to answer a call the whole day. Last night the same happened. He never called. I called about three times after 10:30. After the third call he turned the phone off. I left two messages. This morning I called and he said he got the message but was too drunk out of his mind. Well good for him. I'm glad that he finds joy and pleasure doing that. How inconsiderate. He called at 1:30 today and asked me if I was mad and how come I cut him short in the morning ..... like it matters. I haven't called since and I will not even bother. To hell.

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What? O_o [18 Feb 2004|02:00pm]



You have at your command the icicles of the ages.


Add a fortune to your website or
blog, click
here.

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[18 Feb 2004|09:53am]
[ mood | sick ]

My brother is such a dumb ass. Some stupid kid was picking on him and he pulled out Tim's toy gun and threatened to kill him. The kid then went home and called the police. They came later looking for the gun and searched all over his room. The police mainly deals with stupid kids. They try to become their friends to know what is going on. Kids are such dumb asses. My brother is such a dumb ass. The other kid could've had a weapon and pulled it out. What would have my brother done? Shoot at him w/the fake gun? geez.

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[15 Feb 2004|06:44pm]
[ mood | drained ]

I went to the hospital today and the charge nurse was the meanest most very unhelpful b*tch on the unit. Then I came to wait on the bus that went to Sunnyside. I waited at the stop for almost 20 minutes. I was thinking that I should've walked. But then I didn't know how long it would've taken me. The White Shuttle does not work on Sundays. I asked the bus driver if he made stops at the Brown Lot and he told me that he did not know what I was talking about O_o. He must've been new. He must've not been sure where to make his next stop because he stopped forever to look at some map. I felt tempted to tell him to hurry and go. I was a little scared that I was going to have to pay or never go to the Brown Lot. The White shuttle goes directly to the lot and is free. I just didn't know that it didn't work on Sundays. I wonder why Tim never told me about the lot last semester because Emma and I payed for parking at the hospital all that time. I came home today and finished my homework. My brain is exhausted and blank.

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[13 Feb 2004|09:41pm]
[ mood | gloomy ]

I don't remember when I last updated this so I will say that I'm in school taking Pediatrics and I hate it. I hate every little bit of it. I hate it like I had never hated anything. I hate everything about it. People say it's easy and it's a review of Med. Surg. but then why am I struggling so hard. Everything I'm doing is just pointless. I'm just getting old and going nowhere. I hate going to Texa's Childrens. I would never be a Pedi nurse. I hate it. I hate the stupid sh*tty teacher I got stuck with. Why did I not get put with Ms. Gillispie or Ms. Jammer? This b*tch is making my life hell. Adding her own stupid sh*t to all our careplans. She completely came up with her own careplan which is nothing like the past ones. All these stupid interventions are a crock of sh*t. I've never seen a nurse write a damn careplan at the hospital. Nursing is all fake. Nursing is a giant crock of sh*t. "Give medications as prescribed to relieve pain" isn't that so stupid? What is medication for?? I thought to tickle the patient ... oh but in nursing school I learned that pain medication should be given when the patient has pain. Please. Who comes up with all this sh*t. I almost quit on Wednesday. I hate everything. I'm so bitter. Tim got himself a job at Bentaub. Good for him. I'm happy. I wish I could work. But nooooooo. Maybe my parents should've just never brought me with them. I feel hopeless.

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[01 Feb 2004|01:45am]
[ mood | depressed ]

Hey blurty ... I'm back. Sorry I've been gone too long ... I tend to become desanimate at times. These days have been of those times .... and I all can say is I wish my life was different. I am tired. Even depressed. I'm tired of 9-11. I'm tired of hearing about the war, the economy, the republicans, the illegals, gay marriage, George Bush. It makes me so sick. I'm not happy in this place. There's nothing for me. There is no life. I have no freedom. I have been segregated.

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[17 Jan 2004|03:34pm]
[ mood | annoyed ]

I have discovered that I hate having a social life ... not that I do much. I don't have any time for one and everybody bothers me. I have to accept invitations, be at my own parties (prepared by the parents), go out here, and go out there and what not. I don't have any money to be out and hanging out. Some people just don't see it. I need to do my school work. If I don't accept an invitation people are offended. Last week was my grandmothers going away party and I had to be there. Yesterday I was at school and came too tired to do any work. At night my whole family just showed up. Adriane gave me a call but I could not talk on the phone and be rude to all. Today grandma left and asked if I'd be going to the airport (at 5:00am) of course I had to. At lunch time the neighbors came and stayed for lunch. Tonight Tim's parent's are taking us out to eat. My goodness. If I could I'd only have one best friend and one good friend. I mean, not that I am so bad, ungrateful, and selfish. It's just that I have school to worry about and right now it is the one and only thing I care about. Nursing schools makes you just forget the rest of everybody else and the whole world and what is out there. It makes you not even wanna know about it. I have become like that. I have too much of my own to worry about. When you are in nursing school the only person you care about is your own self and that is exactly what has happened to me. I don't want to be selfish but it's true. School just makes you. The pressure and stress is just to much to handle. I don't care about anything or anybody else.

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[14 Jan 2004|12:44pm]

Laura has adopted a dragon fetus
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[14 Jan 2004|09:02am]
[ mood | drained ]

I'm dead. Mornings are such a drag. There hasn't been a morning lately that I haven't had to drag myself out of bed and every where else that I go.

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[06 Jan 2004|12:47pm]
[ mood | happy ]

I went to NY and now I'm back. YaY. I went to Times Square, Central Park, 6th Avenue, 42nd Avenue, Manhattan, the Statue of Liberty, and other places I can't remember. I also stayed in New Jersey right where you can see the Hudson river and Manhattan on the other side. I saw the Empire State building from there, the bridges that connect NY and NJ together and the buildings where the Twin Towers used to be.

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The tree planted by the stream [16 Dec 2003|11:17pm]
[ mood | sad ]

Today I received the news that a friend died. I went to bible study for teens and the lesson was Psalm 1. The tree planted by the streams of water ... rooted like a palm tree. Winds come and go and sway it left and right until you think it's going to break and once the winds are gone, it goes back up. These trees grow strong and then bear fruit. You know the kind of tree this is by the kind of fruits it bears. But if the tree stops giving fruits, it will die and become dry. A dying tree has it's branches cut ... in hope that it will heal and start growing fruits. If the tree won't bear fruits, it gets cut. People are those trees and God is the stream of water. If we go away from this source of life we won't give fruits and might start to dry and die. In his great love, God cuts our branches in hope that we will straighten out. If we don't bear fruits ... he can cut our lives short. I realized that I'm not really doing anything. Not giving fruits. I am a rotten tree.

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[15 Dec 2003|10:33pm]
whipcunt
You are whipcunt! Sassy and careless. Most
people think you're a bitch but obviously you
don't give a shit what others think of
you. A true bad ass..Good for you!


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[15 Dec 2003|02:50pm]
[ mood | happy ]

What Irrational Number Are You?
You are √2

You are in good company, many other square roots are also irrational numbers. Just by being a square root you have been branded a radical. You are considered very attractive, especially by Europeans (at least on paper.)

You fear that a relationship with another √2 may somehow end up complex and ultimately imaginary. In reality, only another √2 will make you whole.

Your lucky number is approximately 1.41421356

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[13 Dec 2003|08:51pm]
[ mood | happy ]

I am out of school and made it through the first year of nursing school. That means that I am half way done :) I'm so happy because I'm taking a trip to New Jersey next week. I leave on Friday. I am really looking forward to it and I'm gonna make the best I can of it. Tim's graduation was today. He had a party w/the family yesterday and someone gave him his first pair of scrubs .. Pepe LePew scrubs and he looked so cute! I was so happy and proud. I gave him a gift card from Barnes&Noble because he loves to read and I couldn't go all the way to Almeda mall and get him the shirt he liked. He walked across the podium and I almost cried. He's a nurse now. I'm so happy. I'm so proud. Some day it's gonna be me across the podium .... Laura, RN.

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