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[15 May 2009|10:35pm] |
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I've been feeling sick in the stomach since last night :( Tim is out of town for a re-enactment of WWII. I went shopping and got underwear at Victoria's Secret and later in the day bought a maternity dress since my clothes don't fit anymore. I also bought a small container of shampoo, lotion, body wash, and pads for the hospital after delivery. I bought two kinds - heavy flow overnight, and heavy flow ultra thin. I am 25 weeks pregnant now and feel my baby move a lot. I am very happy in life right now even though sometimes I think about the time and everything else I have lost. I wonder about the future and what life is going to be like as a mother. I also gave up on trying to be part of the family God put me in. I finally realized that none of them have ever cared about me. I wish I had disowned them sooner than I did.
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[04 May 2009|10:14am] |
Fun Stuff ! Actual Hospital Charts Share Today at 10:07am 1. The patient refused autopsy.
2. The patient has no previous history of suicides.
3. Patient has left white blood cells at another hospital.
4. She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night.
5. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.
6. On the second day the knee was better and on the third day it disappeared.
7. The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed.
8. The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.
9. Discharge status: Alive but without permission.
10. Healthy appearing decrepit 69-year-old male, mentally alert but forgetful.
11. Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.
12. She is numb from her toes down.
13. While in ER, she was examined, x-rated and sent home.
14. The skin was moist and dry.
15. Occasional, constant infrequent headaches.
16. Patient was alert and unresponsive.
17. Rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid.
18. She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life, until she got a divorce.
19. I saw your patient today, who is still under our car for physical therapy.
20. Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation.
21. Examination of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized.
22. The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.
23. Skin: somewhat pale but present.
24. The pelvic exam will be done later on the floor.
25. Patient has two teenage children, but no other abnormalities.
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[21 Apr 2009|10:36am] |
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mood |
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disappointed |
] |
I have the shittiest family anybody could have ever been born in. They never give a shit about you unless you do something bad then they can talk shit about you. They're all a bunch of hypocrite gossip loving backstabbers. They stab each other in the back all the time. For example, when George was going around with some lady, Marne would run to my father's house and would tell my dad everything about it and the reason was so dad would "pray" about the situation. I don't think Claudia would have wanted my dad to know about her husband's infidelity. Dad of course I guess told my mother who then told me. That is how gossip spreads. In my family, nobody can keep a secret. Claudia would feel betrayed if she ever knew that her sister went and blabbed her mouth at my parent's house. Things like these happen in that family ALL the time. I have detached myself from them but it is sad to see how the people God gave you as a family act more like an enemy. I can't even remember when the last time any of them called to ask how I've been doing was. In fact, I don't think they ever have. It's been months since I heard anything from any of them. I guess the only nice one of them is my dad's brother. He was happy when he heard about my pregnancy and even stopped by to say 'hi.' Oh well. I guess I just won't have a family. When grandma dies, that will be the last day I see any of them and my cousins Cesia and Susan will only be like my friends.
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[11 May 2006|05:23pm] |
           
(Comment to be added)
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| LoL ... a Bush joke :) |
[19 Oct 2005|08:02pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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happy |
] |
Five surgeons are discussing who makes the best patients to operate on.
The first surgeon says, "I like to see accountants on my operating table, because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered."
The second responds, "Yeah, but you should try electricians! Everything inside them is color coded."
The third surgeon says, "No, I really think librarians are the best; everything inside them is in alphabetical order."
The fourth surgeon chimes in: "You know, I like construction workers...those guys always understand when you have a few parts left over at the end, and when the job takes longer than you said it would."
But the fifth surgeon shut them all up when he observed: "You're all wrong! President Bush is the easiest to operate on. He has no guts, no heart, no balls, no brains and no spine! Plus, his head and his ass are interchangeable."
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[11 Oct 2005|08:15pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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happy |
] |
| How to make a Laura |
Ingredients:
5 parts mercy
5 parts humour
3 parts ego |
Method: Stir together in a glass tumbler with a salted rim. Top it off with a sprinkle of caring and enjoy! |
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[28 Sep 2005|10:16am] |
| [ |
mood |
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hungry |
] |
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[20 Sep 2005|07:37pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
happy |
] |
I drew this picture with Dante :)
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[01 Sep 2005|10:59am] |
| [ |
mood |
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sick |
] |
I was hoping I'd sleep the whole morning but my parents and my brother are so inconsiderate. It's as if I have to wake up because they did. It's stupid. Just because you get up early in the morning doesn't mean everyone else should too. I didn't open the door for my mother so she grabbed her key and came in. I asked her to lock it again when she left and she didn't. So then my brother (who I've told not to bother me in the morning) came in to ask me a stupid question (as usual). I bitched at him and he left. I tried to go back to sleep but the birds started squawking. I had to get up and remove the blanket from the cage. Then I felt too cold. I had to get up and adjust the AC. Then I heard my brother yell good bye to me from the living room. Then my mother called on my cell phone. I didn't pick it up. I looked at the time. It was 9:30. I got up and cleaned the kitchen. I really am feeling like shit though. I wanna move out of this place. I want to live by myself. Living with annoying family is worse than living alone. It's dark outside and it's beginning to rain. It's dark and gloomy outside. I love the rain.
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[30 Aug 2005|12:20pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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okay |
] |
I spent almost $2,000 on tuition and supplies. Ridiculous. I went to fill my gas tank and then I went to deposit some money in my checking account. I just dream of the day I'm able to get a job as a nurse and I move out and never worry about not having money. I dream of having a nice apartment. Not expensive but not cheap. I want it to have a small patio or a balcony. I don't know.
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| Another one [snagged from 2punk__rok4diz ] |
[10 Aug 2005|09:40pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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happy |
] |
SEVEN THINGS IN YOUR ROOM: 1. Bed 2. Laptop 3. Aquarium 4. Notebook 5. Bulletin board 6. Lamp 7. Bookshelf
TOP SEVEN THINGS YOU SAY MOST: 1. What the hell? 2. Yeah ... sure 3. Damn it! 4. I love you 5. Yeah .. whatever 6. sh*tty 7. Why me?
SEVEN THINGS YOU CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT: 1. Cell phone 2. Car 3. Laptop 4. School 5. Money 6. Air conditioner 7. Friends
SEVEN THINGS YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOU DIE: 1. Get a degree 2. Have a big house 3. Get married 4. Have kids 5. Have pets 6. Be happy 7. Be successful
SEVEN OTHER THINGS: Do You: 1. Believe in God? Yes 2. Had a dream come true? Yes 3. Read the newspaper? Sometimes 4. Pray? Sometimes 5. Have a job? Yeah .. kinda 6. Attend church? Sometimes 7. Wish on shooting stars? I haven't seen one lately
Have you ever: 1. Gone skinny dipping? No 2. Had surgery? No 3. Swam in the dark? No 4. Been to a Bonfire? Yes 5. Ran away from home? No 6. Played strip poker? No 7. Pulled an all nighter? Many times
SEVEN THINGS IN THE LAST 24 HOURS: Have you... 1. Cried? No 2. Laughed? Yeah .. watching Sponge Bob 3. Been kissed? Yeah .. you'll never guess where ;) j/k! 4. Felt sexy? No 5. Talked to an ex? Nope .. one's in jail. I haven't seen the other one since high school 6. Missed someone? Yeah 7. Hugged someone? Yeah
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| Another one |
[06 Aug 2005|12:21pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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full |
] |
10 REALLY RANDOM THINGS ABOUT ME [01] I am quiet [02] I feel sad a lot [03] I look very young for my age [04] I am a Registered Nurse [05] I am in school for another degree [06] I am a people person [07] I love animals [08] I wanna go back to my country [09] I hate sluts that will sleep w/anything [10] I hate porn
9 WAYS TO WIN MY HEART [01] make me laugh [02] Buy me some coffee [03] Invite me over [04] Write me a letter [05] Love me [06] Send me a card [07] Call me [08] Come with me to the park [09] Be nice to me
8 THINGS I CARRY/WEAR EVERYDAY [01] Cell phone [02] Earings [03] Keychain [04] Purse [05] Note book [06] Necklace [07] Ring [08] Glasses
7 THINGS THAT ANNOY ME [01] Ignorance [02] Uneducated people [03] Poor people who have many kids [04] Being asked for money [05] Doing laundry [06] Low wage [07] The republican party
6 PLACES I'VE VISITED [01] San Antonio [02] Galveston [03] Rockport [04] Seguin [05] Lolita [06] Wharton
5 THINGS I WANT TO DO BEFORE I DIE [01] Get married [02] Have a house [03] Be successful [04] Have kids [05] Be happy
4 THINGS I AM AFRAID OF [01] Walking sticks [02] Failure [03] Dying [04] Being alone
3 THINGS I DO EVERYDAY [01] Go online [02] Go to class [03] Talk to my boyfriend
2 THINGS I'M TRYING TO DO NOW [01] Not be too emotional [02] Be patient
1 PERSON I WANT TO SEE NOW [01] My significant other
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| I love this pic |
[02 Aug 2005|04:25pm] |
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[02 Aug 2005|05:24am] |
| [ |
mood |
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sick |
] |
I saw Christine this morning. She was out taking a break drinking a soda. I just got out of taking my second Sociology test. I think I made a B on it. The guy sitting behind me is pretty cool. He plays in a band for different churches. That is pretty awesome. He must have a lot of fun and lots of friends. No wonder he looks so happy all the time. What messes me up is being so introverted and going to my parents church where nothing ever happens. That place is so lame. The so called "youth group" is a bunch of old people. I'm feeling a little dizzy when I move too much and suddenly. I took my blood pressure and it was like 102/60 which I guess is kind of low. My pulse was 102.
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[31 Jul 2005|07:51pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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crappy |
] |
I'm on my period and it hurts like hell
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[03 Jun 2005|09:25pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
amused |
] |
Yesterday I went swimming and saw a snake in the pool. I had been swimming for about an hour when Carol, who was standing right in front of me yelled SNAAAAKE!!!! and swam out of the pool in the blink of an eye. I froze for about a second. I looked down and saw the snake pass on my right shoulder and it rub my neck. Then I screamed and started swimming to the stairs as fast as I could. Then I came out and stood right next to Carol. My brother was still in the water ... in the deep part. It took him a while to realize that we really did see a snake. Then it clicked in his head and he began to swim out of there. The funny thing was that without thinking he went the long way. Instead of swimming to the bars, he swam across the whole pool as fast as he could LoL. It was so funny. All I could do was laugh. This morning I told Billy about the incident and he didn't seem too convinced. He said there was no way a snake could be in the pool. He even told me that we had just probably imagined something until he went to look and found the dead snake. It drowned. The poor thing probably had been trying to cling on to something (me) but it drowned. It was scary though ... and funny too.
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[31 May 2005|06:49pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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disappointed |
] |
I feel like Cinderella. I come home to find a mess. Piles of dishes, dirty floors. I am so tired. Sometimes I wish I'd find a genie in a lamp. I need a genie.
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[22 May 2005|02:11pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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hot |
] |
I don't feel like doing anything ... not even upgrading this thing. I hate Texas weather.
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[22 May 2005|02:00pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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happy |
] |
(x) smoked a cigarette (x) smoked a cigar ( ) made out with a member of the same sex ( ) crashed a friend's car ( ) stolen a car (x) been in love ( ) been dumped ( ) shoplifted ( ) been fired ( ) been in a fist fight (x) snuck out of my parent's house ( ) had feelings for someone who didnt have them back ( ) been arrested ( ) made out with a stranger ( ) gone on a blind date ( ) lied to a friend ( ) had a crush on a teacher ( ) skipped school ( ) seen someone die ( ) been to Mexico (x) been on a plane ( ) been snowboarding ( ) been in an abusive relationship (x) taken painkillers (x) love someone or miss someone right now (x) laid on your back and watched cloud shapes go by (x) had a tea party (x) flown a kite ( ) built a sand castle (x) gone puddle jumping ( ) played dress up (x) jumped into a pile of leaves ( ) gone sledding (x) cheated while playing a game (x) been lonely (x) fallen asleep at work/school ( ) used a fake id (x) watched the sun set (x) felt an earthquake ( ) touched a snake ( ) slept beneath the stars (x) been robbed (x) pet a reindeer/goat (x) won a contest (x) run a red light (x) been suspended from school (x) been in a car accident ( ) had braces (x) felt like an outcast (x) had deja vu ( ) danced in the moonlight ( ) witnessed a crime ( ) pole danced ( ) questioned your heart ( ) been obsessed with post-it notes. ( ) squished barefoot through the mud (x) been lost ( ) been to the opposite side of the country (x) swam in the ocean (x) felt like dying (x) cried yourself to sleep (x) played cops and robbers (x) recently colored with crayons/colored pencils/markers ( ) sung karaoke ( ) paid for a meal with only coins (x) done something you told yourself you wouldn't ( ) made prank phone calls (x) caught a snowflake on your tongue ( ) danced in the rain ( ) made a bonfire on the beach (x) gone rollerskating ( ) had a wish come true ( ) jumped off a bridge (x) ate dog/cat food (x) sang in the shower (x) had a dream that you married someone ( ) glued your hand to something (x) sat on a roof top (x) screamed at the top of your lungs (x) done a one-handed cartwheel (x) talked on the phone for more than 4 hours (x) stayed up all night (x) climbed a tree ( ) had a tree house ( ) scared to watch a scary movie alone (x) believe in ghosts ( ) have more then 30 pairs of shoes (x) played blind chicken ( ) been pushed into a pool with all your clothes on (x) been told you're hot by a complete stranger ( ) broken a bone (x) caught a fish and ate it ( ) made porn (x) caught a butterfly (x) laughed so hard you cried (x) had someone moon/flash you (x) cheated on a test (x) forgotten someone's name ( ) slept naked ( ) gone skinny dipping ( ) been kicked out of your classroom (x) sang in your car (x) drink alcohol
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[13 May 2005|10:29pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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happy |
] |
I got a Wire Fox Terrier puppy. He is really cute but he is hyper and I can't make him calm down. He has a sad puppy face but when you approach him he jumps all over. He scratched me on the legs, the arms, and even on the head. He is so crazy. I named him Einstein. He is sooo cute. Tim built him a little dog house and I got him some toys and ordered him a little doggie tag online. I am sending him his registration papers in the mail tomorrow and I'm taking him to Petco to get all his shots updated.
I worked my butt off the whole day. Yesterday I did something dumb. I went to the gas station, went in to pay for the gas, came out, got back in the car and drove away. I forgot to fuel the tank. I have no idea how in the world that happened. I had never done such a thing. The guy at the station asked me to go out with him one of these days. I told him no. Then he asked me why not and I told him that I didn't even know him. He said that it had been a year. I was like what?? I wouldn't know how long I've known you. and he asked me if I would go out with him maybe some day. I said I don't know ... maybe some day. But I bet that's what he says to all the other girls that go there. Guys like him, I don't even listen to. It was so funny today. I went to the marble company with my aunts today and the guys were checking me out! I didn't notice except when Marne was smiling and talking to a guy and both were looking at me. I looked back to my cell phone and kept reading and sending text messages. I didn't even notice the guys! Then when I came home, Marne was telling me that they were all checking me out. I was like Really? You're kidding me right?. She was like no!It was so funny. I was so busy text messaging I didn't even notice.
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[04 May 2005|10:21am] |
You Know You're Addicted to Coffee When... |
You can jump start your car without cables.
You answer the door before people knock.
You get a speeding ticket even when you are parked.
You've worn out your third pair of shoes this week.
Your eyes stay open even when you sneeze.
You grind coffee beans in your mouth.
You can type sixty words per minute -- with your feet.
You sleep with your eyes open.
You have a picture of your coffee mug on your coffee mug.
Instant coffee takes too long to make.
You channel surf faster without the remote.
You've built a miniature city out of little plastic stirrers.
You short out motion detectors.
You walk twenty miles on your treadmill before you realize it's not plugged in.
All your kids are named Joe.
Juan Valdez named his donkey after you.
Starbucks owns the mortgage on your house.
The Taster's Choice couple wants to adopt you.
When someone asks 'How are you?' you say, 'Good to the last drop'.
You can outlast the Energizer bunny.
You can take a picture of yourself from ten feet away without using the timer.
You can't even remember your second cup.
You chew on other people's fingernails.
You don't even wait for the water to boil anymore.
You don't get mad, you get steamed.
You don't need a hammer to pound in nails.
You don't tan, you roast.
You forget to unwrap candy bars before eating them.
You go to AA meetings just for the free coffee.
You go to sleep just so you can wake up and smell the coffee.
You have to watch videos in fast-forward.
You haven't blinked since the last lunar eclipse.
You help your dog chase its tail.
You introduce your spouse as your coffee mate.
You just completed another sweater and you don't know how to knit.
You lick your coffeepot clean.
You name your cats Cream and Sugar.
You ski uphill.
You speak perfect Arabic without ever taking a lesson.
You speed-walk in your sleep.
You spend every vacation visiting Maxwell House.
You think CPR stands for Coffee Provides Resuscitation.
You'd be willing to spend time in a Turkish prison.
Your first-aid kit contains two pints of coffee with an I.V. hookup.
Your lips are permanently stuck in the sipping position.
Your nervous twitch registers on the Richter scale.
Your only source of nutrition comes from Sweet & Low.
Your taste buds are so numb; you could drink your lava lamp.
You're so wired, you pick up AM radio.
You've built a miniature city out of little plastic stirrers.
You've worn out the handle on your favourite mug.
You take your morning coffee with you in the shower.
Your heart beats noticeably faster as a reaction to the smell of coffee.
You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends who are addicted to coffee. |
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| Not looking forward to tomorrow |
[02 May 2005|09:28pm] |
| [ |
music |
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Rock & Roll is here to stay - D.White |
] |
Sometimes I feel angry ... but mainly I feel unhappy. This summer is going to come and go and I'm still going to be in the same place. I'm not looking forward to this week. I'm working the whole day tomorrow. I'm going to school early in the morning for a final and I'm babysitting in the evening. I tried to quit but Shelly didn't let me.
If I could rub a lamp and have a genie give me three wishes I would ask for:
1. A job in my profession 2. My mother's back pain to go away 3. Tim to love me unconditionally
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[27 Apr 2005|02:10pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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drained |
] |
I worked like a mule the whole day. I tried to take a nap but the only way I could stop my body from aching was if I kept moving. All I could do was feel the aching and fatigue while lying there. It was the only thing I had in my head so I got back up and went out for a walk at Crenshaw. Maybe I needed to walk to make myself more tired ... maybe that way I would fall asleep. It wasn't so bad when I first got there. Walking and moving took the ache away but when I was leaving I was just dead. Now my feet were killing me. I came home to lay in bed and got a headache. It took me forever to fall asleep. Then suddenly I just woke up very early in the morning and tried to fall back asleep. Being tired is so sh*tty. I haven't done math homework in ages. I didn't even study for the test that I took this morning. It wasn't so bad though. It's time for my next class. I really don't want to go.
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[25 Apr 2005|11:30pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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enthralled |
] |
Just one touch is more than enough To understand that there's a master plan And although I don't believe in destiny Maybe it found me
And there is a symphony And a melody that plays Whenever you are around ...I think I've been found
I can see the sun And I can feel the rain I can hear the wind call your name I can feel your love But there's one thing I can't do I can't ever get enough of you
Your eyes are the kindest that I've ever seen I guess there are some things you just know There's a voice inside telling me to hold on And never let you go
There is a tune that plays It's a sacred sound It's a symphony I hear Whenever you are around
My world is filled with a whisper of love and a promise of tomorrow
I can see the sun And I can feel the rain I can hear the wind call your name I can feel your love But there is one thing I can't do I can't ever get enough of you
I can't count all the colors I see in your eyes And while your heart beats in mine, it's true I can't ever get enough of you
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[22 Apr 2005|12:59pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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lethargic |
] |
Yesterday my aunt yelled at me. She said that I needed to wake up and say something. Then she gave me some examples of how she has been so successful in life by being persistent. If she's so smart and sharp and successful how come she cannot afford to buy a house ... or at least rent an apartment? She is the only one of the 5 siblings who never did anything with her life. Never bought a house, never got her own apartment. She's struggling with her old car.
I left class this morning and I kind of regret it. Well...whatever. I feel so weird. I have this "floating in the air" sensation and can't hear very well from one ear. I want to go home but my mother is there. My Govt. test is already next week and I haven't read yet. I haven't done my math review either. Yesterday I meant to fill my gas tank but realized that I forgot the money for it under my candle. I thought I'd just fill it up today this morning. Not only did I wake up late and had to rush, I forgot the money again. All I could find was $2.10 to buy a gallon. I was late to math class too. I just want some coffee. Why does life have to be such a drag?
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[18 Apr 2005|08:22pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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annoyed |
] |
I almost couldn't get out of bed this morning. On the articles I have collected to turn in for Government I am for the death penalty, morning-after pill, punishment, and getting people off life support and stuff like that. I think more people should get death penalty over rotting in prison while good citizen's taxes are keeping their asses alive. The morning-after pill would reduce pregnancies that bring unwanted children (and more people) into this world. And why should people be kept on life support? why not just let them die?
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[15 Apr 2005|10:00am] |
| [ |
mood |
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confused |
] |
Something strange happened yesterday. At the house that I was at, I was looking around admiring the house when I heard a door slam. The house is lonely and quiet except for the AC which is about all you can hear. I instantly thought somebody was upstairs. I asked my aunt and she told me that no one was home. We went upstairs to see anyway. It was so creepy. We opened a couple of doors and looked in the attic. We didn't see anything or anybody. A while later I heard another door slam again and maybe half a second after, another slam. Now I really freaked out. Then my aunt told me that she had also been hearing things up there and that was the reason why she had left the day before. She was really thinking about calling the owner and asking him if he had ever hear anything up there because it seemed to us that someone was doing something up there. I don't know. I don't believe in ghosts trying to scare people but that was very real and very loud and I know that it was a door slam and it really freaked me out to think that someone is hiding up in the attic cause my aunt told me that she heard a scream. At first I thought she was just feeding me sh*t. Then I started thinking that it is not possible to live in that attic. It probably gets too hot up there in the summer and it's dark. I don't know. I thought it might have just been the wind ... but how does the wind make a door slamming sound?
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| Snagged from Johnny_Mercury |
[07 Apr 2005|10:29pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
uncomfortable |
] |
Tell me about the MUSIC of your heart:
Last song you listened to by choice: Ooh Baby I love your way -- Big Mountain
A song that reminds you of elementary school: The Fraggle Rock song
A song that reminds you of middle school: Wanna Be -- Spice Girls
A song that reminds you of high school: The one that says "I'm just a kid and life is a nightmate .. I'm just a kid, and life is a nightmare cause I'm alone in the world."
A song that reminds you of a loved one: Ring of Fire -- Johnny Cash
A song that makes you cry: Only Time - Enya
A song that makes you happy: This Kiss -- Faith Hill
A song you know every word to: This I promise you -- Nsync
A song that reminds you of your ex: Vivir sin aire -- Mana
A song that reminds you of a breakup: Be with you -- Enrique Iglesias
A song for a warm summers day: Summer Sunshine
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[29 Mar 2005|07:27pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
flirty |
] |
I feel sexy
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[27 Mar 2005|05:06pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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sad |
] |
I quit my stupid job on Thursday. I called Robert and told him that I wouldn't be coming to work anymore. He asked for the apron and some piece of cloth that I was supposed to have gotten but never did. I couldn't believe that I had to do all that work all by myself after closing the place. My face was sweating. That is why I felt so mad. Nobody helped me .. specially Gloria. She would just sit there and drink a margarita while I would sweat my butt off. That's exploitation. How can Robert be so happy at the expense of others. I hate his brother. His brother is a heartless asshole. I went to say good bye to my coworkers in the kitchen. I told them why I was leaving and one of them told me that she was going to quit that same night too. I was so glad to hear that. I really hope she quit .. cause that's two people quitting the same week. That should show them how sad it is to work at that place. I am about to quit babysitting too. Jim thinks he's doing me a favor with the amount of money he pays me. It is ridiculous. Everyone wants free labor. Nobody wants to pay. I was so sad the night that I worked for Jim for 11 hours cause what he paid me was not even minimum wage. Then I think of all the hours I put in with Robert and of all the days that I closed. I think of the smell of my hair after coming home from work and it makes me just want to cry. All my dad ever does is tell me all these stories about how he struggled with so much stuff and of other people who went through stuff but my life is different. I do not care to hear about the tragedies of other people. That doesn't do anything for me. Nothing about people interests me. I'm gonna go buy some pillow cases and yarn tomorrow, to entertain myself with something. Maybe that way I won't feel so sad.
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[25 Jan 2005|11:03am] |
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mood |
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happy |
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I took my State Board's exam yesterday.
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[21 Jan 2005|10:10pm] |
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I read Five People You'll Meet in Heaven. The books starts at the end and goes all the way to the beginning. So the beginning is the end and the end is the beginning. Before that book I read Secrets of a Mistress and before I read Kitchen Priviledges ... that was Mary Higging's biography. It was very boring. I don't know why I even bothered.
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[12 Dec 2004|12:31am] |
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Now I know why Sun didn't want to take Phuong to my pinning ceremony. Sun was going out with Phoung and obviously didn't want me to know it. I was very shocked to have found out. She told me that they have been going out for about a year and a half .. that's almost as long as Tim and I have been going out. It was so weird. Now I know why she kept saying you think you know someone, but you really don't. I was like What the hell?? but now I know why she was acting all weird. I don't understand how come she never told me that they were going out though. It was so weird. No wonder he made such a big deal about me asking him to meet her somewhere and bring her along. At the ceremony when he saw her he almost ran out. She went after him and then she called me saying that she was going to go home because he made her mad. I called him later and he had turned off his phone. I called him the next day and he didn't answer. That is shady man. I can't believe Sun is that kind of person. I can't believe he'd play with a girl's feelings. I don't even understand why he kept her a secret from me. She told me that she never saw him and he never asked her out or called or anything. If they went out, they went to eat a hamburger or something cheap like that and he didn't even pay for her. She is the one that paid. That is soooo shady. What kind of boyfriend is that? But the weird thing is, he always had time for me ... like when we went to the park to take a walk ... and the times we ate he paid for my meals. One time he invited me to RedLobsters and he paid for my plate. Another time he invited me to a Thai restaurant and paid like $8.50 for my food. For my 21st birthday he brought me roses. A few times he told me that he missed me after not seeing me for long periods of time. A few other times he told me that Tim was lucky to have me as a girlfriend. A few other times he complimented me on my looks. Emma thinks that he probably went out with Phoung because he couldn't have me as his girl. Tim thinks that he is a player and was just trying to get in my pants. I don't think he's a player. I just think he's dumb and immature to be doing what he did to Phuong. I mean, he's already 30 years old. That's kind of old. At his age, he should be thinking about getting serious and getting a wife. Or maybe he is afraid of commitments .. or being hurt. I really have no idea. I wonder if he'll ever talk to me after what happened with Phuong.
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[07 Dec 2004|04:40pm] |
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I felt bad because for some reason Sun did not want to take Phuong to the pinning ceremony. I don't understand why. I mean, they're friends and talk on the phone more than he and I do. I don't get it. Phuong also told me that she feels as if she didn't know him because he's superficial with her. That's not the case with me. I think I know him well enough and he's not superficial with me. Who knows. Oh well. I don't know what's going on in his mind. I just feel bad for bugging him. But then, how hard can it be for him to do her that small favor? It's not like he has something important to do that day. Maybe he didn't want her to hang out with him. I don't know. Oh well. It will just be that day. Something weird happened today. Dr. Sardana told me that Tim told her that he was going to HCC for the RN program. I was like Tim? Tim isn't going to HCC with a puzzled look on my face. She was like Yeah he is.. I was like No he isn't. and she was like He told me that he was. He's working at Ben Tab from 3:00 to 11:00. I was like okay ... O_o and stopped to think for a second that she is confused or he might have told her a lie. Why would he do that though? I have no idea what is going on. She must be losing it. I mean, she gets confused about a lot of things and has so much in mind and loses her head at times. She also tends to repeat a story over and over. Even I was beggining to get confused. I was like are you talking about Timur Tsend?. She was like Yeah, the student from Mongolia. Then I realized that I better shut up before I say something I shouldn't say. It was kind of weird though.
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| Everybody likes to gossip |
[06 Dec 2004|04:07pm] |
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I deleted the last entry because it was dumb .. like some of the other entries. Emma called and asked me about what happened with Ashley and Ben. News travel fast. Out of everyone in the program, I am the one most likely not to have known what happened. I'm not with it. I mean, I really have no idea regarding what is going on unless it involves me. Anyway, Ashley and Ben got caught cheating in Ms. Williams class and were made to drop and repeat the course. This is what Paul told me. He also said that they copied somebody else's paperwork but did not tell me who's work it was. About two nights ago, Sun called and told me that it has been Lauren Diderich's papers but he did not know who snitched. Today Emma called and told me that it had been DeAnne Lee who told on them. The story has come together.
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[02 Dec 2004|11:38pm] |
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The person who hurts me the most is Tim. He can be very insensitive and indifferent at times. He can really lose his temper and lash out at me. Me on the other hand ... I tear into pieces. I actually wish that I didn't care. Sometimes I wish I didn't have any feelings. I wish I was tough. I wish that I was like him.
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[29 Nov 2004|05:19pm] |
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I was on the adolescent unit today. I liked it. The kids are interesting to work with. Many of them are there for being in trouble with the law, I still think they're good to work with and if they turned out like they did, it's really not all their fault. Most of them, I noticed come from broken homes. No wonder they then join gangs and get in trouble. One of them was there for getting high on carburator liquid. Another one was there for cutting her wrists. Another one for overdosing on pills. Another one for assaulting his mother. The one that was there for cutting her wrists told me that she was in the guard. She thought I was cool because I used to be in it. The one sniffing carburator liquid was cool, too. Poor things. I know that although they look tough on the outside, on the inside they are really not. They were born in a bad environment. I think. Anyway, Tim and I got mad at each other. He got mad because I didn't go to the movies with him. Then he called me later and said that he was over it but I said something that made him mad and he started bitching at me again. I had already had too much bitching from him. When he said that he was getting pissed off again, I hung up on him. I called the next day and he didn't pick up the phone. He called me later again way at almost 10:00pm and asked me if I was mad. He told me that his day sucked because he thought I was mad. Yeah right. He is so full of sh*t. I have to go study. I'll be back sometime later though. I should be in the Psych unit with all those people who feel depressed :(
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[24 Sep 2004|03:50pm] |
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I couldn't keep up today. First thing in the morning was getting patient report. Report took longer than usual ... too long I'd say .. just from that I had the idea that the day was going to suck. A patient was there for GI Bleeding and severe anemia. He had just received 3 units of blood. He was NPO and scheduled to go down for a procedure. He also had some tests pending. Vital Signs needed to be taken. Had to be alert for Dr's call. The second patient was asking for Morphine every two hours. He was also diabetic and needed acuchecks. The third patient was there for back pain. The fourth patient was there for Pneumonia and CHF and had more medications than all the patients in the hospital put together. I mean, it was so crazy. She was old and had all kinds of meds. The fifth patient was BIPOLAR. She came from the ICU. Took her telemetry off and wouldn't let anyone approach her to put it back on. She pulled out her IV. Refused some meds., Pissed in her bed. Had to be changed thrice. Kept yelling and complaining. Hit the call button every 5 minutes ... demanded to see the nurse. Demanded to see the Dr. oh lord. After report I went to give everybody a quick look. Then I looked at the MARS, Charts, and gave the meds. The CNA was nowhere to be seen so I had to get the vital signs myself. I also had to get the acu checks. After that I ran to do the assessments. The patiend with pain kept asking for medication. After documenting such thing I gave an IVP push and charted it. After that I ran to do assessments. By the time I was done it was already time to see the charts again and do the acu checks. Damn. After the acuchecks there were new orders. Right while giving the medications ... the patient with GI bleeding got taken to the OR and Tammy was nowhere to be seen. After he left, the other one asked for more pain med. Then he requested a bath ... so I had to unhook him from the IV pump and cover the IV site and get him some towels, wash cloths, a gown, and soap. The wife requested the bed linens to be changed .. I asked Jessica to do it. The other patient needed to have a piggy back med. administered right when Ms. Busch came up to the floor. The line was filled with more air bubbles than all the air available in the planet. Getting it all out was such a waste of prescious time. By the time I left the room ... a patient had been taken down to x-ray. On top of that I lost my nursing notes and had to go around the hospital looking everywhere. It was such a hassle. I gave one last medication and was ready to collapse on the floor dead! That's why I'm glad it's Friday. I have never in my life felt so happy about it being Friday. This was such a long day and the longest week of my life. Working on that presentation for theory and studying for the exam was a night mare. It was so bad, I even had a fight with Tim over the presentation. On Friday night he asked me to come to Woodlands on Saturday to go see his grandmother. That same day Cindy scheduled a study group thing from 1:00pm to 5:00pm. I didn't know that Tim's parents were going to see the grandmother as well. We were depending on their schedule and with Woodlands being an hour away, it just became impossible for me to be able to go. It made Tim mad and he yelled at me how dissapointed he was and how mad he was about us working on the presentation "too fucking long." And he told me that he no longer cared and I should go have fun with my friends because I never had time for anything anymore and hung up on me. I called him back crying and he kept bitching at me even more. I went to the study group very upset. That's why I'm glad that the freakin' thing is finally over. Last night my mother kept demanding for me to give her a back massage right when I was typing my homework on the computer. It was 10:30pm and I still hadn't even had a bath yet. That's why I'm at the library today and I am very temped to take the day off. I'm going home now. Good bye.
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[14 Sep 2004|03:55pm] |
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I almost died the other day on my way home from clinical. I was on 225 and an idiot in a truck forced me out of my lane by getting into it. Without even looking, my first reaction was to sway to the left where an 18 wheeler almost crushed me to my death. I mean, it missed me by just one cinch. If I hadn't gone to the left lane I would have been hit by the truck on the right side and slammed into the 18 wheeler on my left. Either way, I could have died both ways because even if the truck hadn't hit me on the right side, the 18 wheeler could have hit me on the back. It was so scary. For a moment I thought I would die. I mean, I could not believe how lucky I was to have nothing happen to me. I mean, I made it between the two in just a matter of seconds. It is just unbelievable how a few seconds can make the difference. My heart was pounding and I was almost sick to my guts. The first thing to come to my mind was my parents. I usually don't see the importance or purpose of little me being on this earth but I did think about how terrible it would have been for my parents had such thing occured. I don't know why God spared from it but that was the closest to death that I've ever been. It happened in just a matter of seconds.
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