infO. lOsers. mugshOts.

[14 Jul 2003|08:38am]
[ music | missing * evanescence ]

' ' i know this has nothing to do with your post, or anything. but i lov eyou. i'm sorry i'm not the coolest person, or the smartest. and i'm sorry i'm not the person you'd be proud of, because you could say "Yep, that's my friend :D" And i'm so sorry i'm crying. i'm sorry it hurts me everytime you talk to me and you seem to have no emotion, or you are annoyed by me. and i'm sorry i'm completely and totally dependent on you, and wouldnt know what to do without you. and im sorry i burden you with everything i have to say. i'm sorry i tell you every secret i have, even if it's uninteresting. and i'm sorry i'm prolly holding you back. you could do so much with out me. and i'm srry i'm to selfish to let you go. ._. <3 i love you. love always sarah ' '

' ' I know what you're doing, I know what you're up to.
You don't love me. I can tell. I know you ' '

' ' You do nothing but date random people until you get tired of them, then you rip them apart, you have no heart, you only know how to break people. ' '

' ' You're just what everybody says you are. A attention hungry slut. What knowledge you have at the age of 14 is beyond me. ' '

' ' Narcissistic, egoistical, selfish, callous, failure..' '

Opinions, opinions. One from my own boyfriend? Everyday I stand by and take this from everyone around me. I'm everyone's assumption. I'm no ones innocence anymore. I just want to say. Do tell me what I'm thinking. Tell me the reasons for my actions, tell me the number of tears I've cried and strikes I've given, tell me you knew what it feels like for my heart to be pierced by a person rusted hate. Over and over again. Tell me what I feel and what I think. I am your creation, after all.

' ' You would do that? People like you need to be shot. ' '
' ' Yes, yes, narcissistic, lustful, selfish, etc., we're terrible, but I don't plan on dying soon, and suicide is teh sucks.

So why not follow along? I seem to be getting somewhere this way. Show me what I had when I showed you what I gave.

bright spark

shut up i know im slow [08 Jul 2003|02:58am]

9/11 victim
bright spark

............... [03 Jul 2003|09:08pm]
- SLAMS FIST. - NO NO NO. .. i want to love again.. i want to love i want to love.

anatomy of a genius. [02 Jul 2003|01:53am]
Wasted: A Memoir of Anorexia and Bulimia - Marya Hornbacher
Go Ask Alice - Anonymous ( urg, I was going to read it, but when i turned around, this bitch got it off the shelf, two seconds before I was going to. )
Smack - Melvin Burgess
Journals - Kurt Cobain, Julie Grau ( editor )
Blackwood Farm - Anne Rice ( I saw it on my way to Nicaragua last year, I wanted it so bad, but it costs 40 dollars, since it was in one of those airport stores. )
Tale of the Body Thief - Anne Rice ( My mom threw away my copy. She thought I didn't want it because the cover was gone. )
Echo - Francesca Lia Block ( Recommended by Kamele. <3 )
I Was a Teenage Fairy - Francesca Lia Block ( I remember seeing this book in my Elementary School library, never got around to reading it, Goosebumps and Frankestein seemed more important back then. )
Vittorio The Vampire - Anne Rice
Mayfair series - Anne Rice

Books I have, that I need to read;

Pandora - Anne Rice
The Vampire Armand - Anne Rice
Angela's Ashes - Frank McCourt

Currently reading;

Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix - J.K. Rowling
Memnoch The Devil - Anne Rice

recommend anything?

OH BABY. [18 Jun 2003|04:13am]
[ mood | creative ]

JFK JUNlOR: i wonder
Shdes 0f Grey: Good. I'm glad it's fine.
JFK JUNlOR: if it would be almost unbearable
Shdes 0f Grey: Yeah, I have one.
Shdes 0f Grey: Point?
JFK JUNlOR: to have a dildo made of ice in you
Shdes 0f Grey: It wouldn't stay ice for long, Maria.
Shdes 0f Grey: =D
JFK JUNlOR: but in the process
JFK JUNlOR: would it sting and such?
Shdes 0f Grey: Eh...I dunno?
Shdes 0f Grey: Try it!
Shdes 0f Grey: Report back with your findings!
JFK JUNlOR: ...well.. maybe - runs to see if there are any popsicles -
Shdes 0f Grey: ::chants:: Popsicle! Popsicle! Popsicle!
Shdes 0f Grey: Anyway...::resumes chanting:: Popsicle! Popsicle! Popsicle!
JFK JUNlOR: you'd love to know i did that, sean.
Shdes 0f Grey: ::would. seriously would::
JFK JUNlOR: we dont have any popsicles, anyway.
JFK JUNlOR: well, we do.
Shdes 0f Grey: =(
Shdes 0f Grey: ::perk::
JFK JUNlOR: .. but its a big stick. o_o those are thick. .. . too thick for maria. - eats it instead. -
Shdes 0f Grey: ::pout::
Shdes 0f Grey: LOL
Shdes 0f Grey: Well...slim it down some!
JFK JUNlOR: i am not going to become lose to a popsicle, k~
Shdes 0f Grey: lmao

bright spark

.. =) [18 Jun 2003|01:09am]
[ mood | giddy ]
[ music | superman can't walk * good charlotte ]

You think that I'm insensitive.. lalala.. ..

It's 1:09am.

I'm spent.


I luv Michael.


He's gorgeous.

Lovely man.


and yeah.

i might have to move to miami.

to Kendall, probably.

I wouldn't mind, just as long as we're sure we're moving to Kendall.

I'll find my old friends.

Make a few new ones.

Because I'm cool, and I could make friends anywhere, even at a funeral. ;x

I have come to the conclusion that people with Nica in them have a sort of animal magnetism.

We always have a lot of friends.

But, a lot of enemies, too.

Its always like that.


I don't get it.

But we're cool like that.

Chris Cornell loves you. =)

.. but he loves me more.

I got a new aol SN.


if I'm not on that one, i'm on,




'Chriis Cornell'

... i know, i'm hell when i get an aol account.


'drunk on iove'. :D

but you might as well IM me on AIM, because anyone whos not on my BL on JFK, Chriis, or Drunk, is blocked.



rollin' down the street. [10 Jun 2003|11:36pm]
.. hmph. I wonder why certain people delete certain comments.

screwy. [09 Jun 2003|05:00pm]
[ mood | amused ]


are you talking to me? - stares at mirror - [09 Jun 2003|01:43am]


toot toot toot.

toot my flute.







aimee rules.

and so does her name.

and when i get my license.

i'm going to texas.

and picking her up.

and i'll be like " toot. :( "

and she'll be like " wtf. - smack. - "

and i'll be like. " OMG. ;.; toot. - hands a ten sack, some vicodin, and a cool pipe. - "

and she'll be like. " TOOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! - packs bowl. toke, toke, toke. - "

and i'll be like " ehee!!! - goes off roading with her. - "

and we'll be like " - sings along to good charlotte. - I USE TO KNOW THE SOUUUUUUUUND OF A SMILE IN YOUR VOICE. "

( that lyric is so sad. ;.; )

and then we'll go to WA.

and kidnap sarah.

and rape Jose.

then rape Dustin.

then we'll crash.

cause we'll be too fucked up on pills.

and we'll fall into a river.

and swim to safety.

but then forget we can't swim.

and we'll die.

on our way down.

we'll be like.

" toot one! "

" toot two!! "

" toot thre-- - bubbles - "

" HAHA YOU PEED IN THE RIVER -- - bubbles - "

.. and then ..we's be ded. =x

bright spark

agh [06 Jun 2003|12:54am]
I was wondering why I needed a cigarette, when I had just had one half an hour ago. Then I realized I was listening to " Losing Grip " by Avril, and that song makes me want to smoke everytime I hear it. Its like, screaming " smoke smoke smoke ". I guess cause when I smoke alone I reminese(sp) on shit. Its like, everytime that song comes on, and I'm smoking, and I finish.. I become a little bit of a better person. Its crazy, I know. BUT SO TRUE YOU'RE JEALOUS. ouu.

[04 Jun 2003|02:03pm]
[ mood | hopeful ]
[ music | ava adore * smashing pumpkins ]

I need a name for my kitty, any suggestions? It's a girl, it's a siamese, blue eyes, tiny, and it meows a lot.

bright spark

best friend means.. [03 Jun 2003|12:36am]
[ mood | excited ]
[ music | there's no 'i' in team * taking back sunday ]

I HAVE A SCAB ON MY FOOT. A NICE. RIPE. SCAB. READY FOR THE PICKING. - runs afk to pick @ it. - n_n;;

yes, this does excite me, EXCUSE ME. - cough. hides the bulge - >_>!

bright spark

Boom, baby. &! [14 Apr 2003|08:35pm]
[ music | Opiate * tOOl ]

This journal is personal property of pornography; aka Maria.

Friends only, you nosey fuck.

Comment, ask, beg, plead, lick my feet.
Rofl, jk.


bright spark

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