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[10 Dec 2009|04:14pm] |
I'm done with drum corps.
And I'm happy to say that.
I can't wait for winterguard season to start.
And for it to end.
I can't wait until I stop sucking at sabre.
I just hope the show turns out to be alright. I feel like right now it's very weary.
I'm very scared for the design tactic of the show.
It's very messy. And I feel liek I don't even spin for half of it.
Whcih is probably okay.
I'm probably okay with that.
Less spinning, less dropping.
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[09 Dec 2009|01:16am] |
One day, one of my old BJ friends will come to check out their old journals, forgetting that it ever existed... and they'll see that I've been here this whole time. And it'll be weird. Because I'm not very censored with things. Or if i am in anyway, I may use private entries sometimes.
I only use this simply because no one really reads it. And i'd rather express raelly stupid things in a place that theres very little chance someone will read it. My LJ is for people to read. If someone reads this though, I woulndt care.
Just saying.
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[09 Dec 2009|01:09am] |
I'm tired of being a mess. I don't care about what I look like, therefore I look like a mess. My job doesn't require me to look nice, so I look like a mess. I used to feel secure in my relationship no matter how i looked, so I look like I mess. I don't feel secure in my relationship anymore and I hate my job, so maybe I should really try to look better. I just get up and go. I put no effort into anything. Really, I just hate my hair. I can't find anything NICE to do with it. I really just need a hairstylist.
I'm tired of being lazy. But i feel so tired and sick all the time. I feel like I have to squeeze every last minute of sleep out of my life that I can.
Guard is going to kill me by the end of the season. With school and work and no weekends. I think I'll be quitting my job soon. I'll probably be unemployed for a while until the summer. And then hopefully once the summer comes I'll be able to find a new job. Doing something that I like to do. And not making juice. I'm so tired of making juice. Doing the same thing everytime I work. And now that I just close all the time its just relentless. Doing the same aggravating thing day in and day out.
I can't wait to move out of this apartment. I'm so tired of my roommate/coworker. I just hope that they let me move out.
I'm tired of feeling like I have to question whether or not Chris will be with someone else. Because we're not allowed to be back in a relationship because if you put a title on something it "restricts" it. So Idk what that means. Its nauseating not knowing that he wont be dating someone else when I'm gone on the weekends. I guess I should trust him. He's never done anything like that before. I don't really thinkhe would. It's just nervewracking otherwise.
I'm so tired. Goodnight.
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[01 Dec 2009|06:37pm] |
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how do people live like that.
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[01 Dec 2009|10:43am] |
i hate it.
i made a mistake.
AND IM STILL PAYING FOR IT.
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[28 Nov 2009|05:20pm] |
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... BAH!
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