| a bloody long philosophy |
[06 Aug 2005|11:51pm] |
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i hope you aren't too fond of capital letters, for i find it hard to "play" my keyboard like a piano, including capital letters. now we have that out of the way, my name is emma. i am from liverpool, which, i find, makes me have at least one more interesting thing to talk about. yes, i do like the beatles. but apart from all you children who think it's 'cool' to like the beatles, i am also proud of them. i have walked the streets they have walked, got an operation (and contracted chicken pox) in the same hospital where sir paul mccartney was born. i find it hard to believe that in my small town, the world's greatest band was born. impressive, yes? okay, what else. i am a complex structure of thoughts, i believe i am more than life. i look at life from the outside, as if it's a joke, and i don't play the game as you should. this doesn't mean i bend the rules, as with any good game, it is better to play by the rules than not play at all. there is no "you can't play" in life. there's nobody telling you you're not allowed to. it's how you play it, and how life plays you, that matters. so i choose to play outside the box. everything you do, think, "hang on, this is only life". believe me, you can live a lot better that way. except doctors and nurses and firemen and stuff, i'd rather they were 'involved', for everyone's sake. what i am saying is, i am a realist. too many people walk round this life, believing they have a structure. whether it is small-scale, such as 9-5, or large, such as marriage, babies, retirement, we all have a structure. some of us believe in nothing else, they believe their purpose is to procreate, get a lot of money and die comfortably. well this for me, is not life. i don't know who gave them this structure, or who told them to settle for this. if it was god, is he really doing you a favour? because i don't believe in "god", so i wonder if that's why my mind is free? there is no structure to my mind, it doesn't expand only to my skull. it can travel anywhere, think anything, try hard to contemplate things. it seems like the only thing it can't work out is logic. saying i don't believe in god isn't a plan to get me in with the punk kids, i could just have easily said "i believe in god" and it would have meant the same thing. i believe there is a higher being. i'll come back to that. i have just learnt, it is true that the tree does not make a sound when it falls in the forest, and there is nobody there to hear it. scientifically, it is fact. it's not even lateral, there is no catch, it is as true as anything. sound doesn't exist, we make it. coming back to my faith, i said i don't believe in god. i said i believe there is a higher being. i do, but i follow the falling tree concept. god isn't there, he is non-existant, but he is made in our minds as the sound from the crash is. that doesn't make him less real. you may be thinking, so why does this mean you don't believe in him? and why does this even need to be said? the answer is, people are all to ready to believe that god is flesh and blood, and lives in heaven awaiting the good souls of dead people. to say this about him is an insult, to preach that god will persecute, help, damage, save, it's all insulting to his concept. god exists in you, if you choose to believe so. the mind can work wonderful things, it can invent such a leader and it can use him. in the end, i don't believe in god. i don't need him at this point in my life, i'm doing fine on my own. religion cannot make me stronger. i like being philosophical on your ass. the meaning of life is to live, what is the point in trying to work out why we are all on this earth? we can do it scientifically, or theologically. or we can just accept that this is how things happened, and now we must make use of it. the only thing you have here is life, and the world. once you're dead, if you're a realist like me, you're dead. you've lost your feelings, you've lost your philosophies on life, you've lost everything. you've lost the wonderful places in the world, like tokyo, and new york, and all the art you haven't seen, and the media, and the things you love the most. there's no point saying "next life", because if you were hanging off a cliff, and someone was ready to throw you down at any minute, would you say, oh it's okay, i'll just live it all in the next life? if you do you're a fool. there isn't a next life, your soul doesn't hang, suspended in the air ready to leap into the next foetus and begin as yourself. souls don't exist, you wrote them with your mind and yes, they're a part of you, but they're also a figment of your mind. that doesn't make them silly, or unreal, it means they're a tool for life, also something you can use. so use it wisely. the ability to empathise is also one of the greatest skills you can ever have, the only way to really feel for someone is to empathise with them. sympathy means nothing if it's just words. so does the word "sorry", i'd rather you didn't. sometimes all we have in this life are words to explain and express ourselves, and if you use them up, there's no meaning left. so i choose my words carefully. and you should too. love. hate. sorry. thankyou. they don't mean anything when they're said over and over. get the most out of life, USE IT. then you can die happy, at the time when your life would be filled with the most regret, you can come out of it all "happy. you have about 7 million minutes on this here earth. the end has no end.
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