I thought that I could rest all my weight
on that gold chain,
though you told me to
I was easy, but anything but the latter,
as I sunk my teeth,
into your bare shoulder.
yesterday was boring. dan was with zech all day.
i took a bunch of pictures of myself in my new bathroom. :) it's true that bathrooms do always have the best lighting.
( here are some, under a cut. )
okay, i have the most embarassing story. :( lol
around maybe 6:30 i got really bored so i decided to go on a walk and get some fresh air.
i went pee and told my mom i was leaving and i was walking down college street and everyone was looking at me strange.
people usually do that, so i didn't pay too much attention to it.. until a lady yelled something about my skirt from her car.
i thought she said she liked it, so i waved. then i felt around for my skirt and realized the back was tucked in my underwear. :( hahah. it was terrible.
so, yeh, i was embarassed and i don't really get embarassed, so you can imagine how bad that was. :)
i went and sat underneath a tree until dan called and came and picked me up.
i got a dirt sundae and then we went to his house. sam, andy and meghan were all there so we went to the beach.
andy got water in his ears trying to learn how to float. :) lol
splash fight. :)
yeh, i know, she looks gorgeous in this picture.
so that was fun.
as we were wrapping up our beach fun, we noticed a rainbow. :) i don't know why. it hadn't rained in about a day. it was pretty, anyway. :)
agh, my favorite. :)
we went back and dan and i hung out in his room for the rest of the night.
we talked and stuff and told eachother a bunch of stuff and it was kind of emotional and blah.
but he's been a lot less crabby since that, so i don't know. i guess it's only been like a day, though.
and it's weird because he told me that he wants to hang out less but he was really eager to hang out with me today and wants to tomorrow right after he jams. i don't know. there must be some kind of catch. :)
i like that we talked, though. i like when he's all nice and sweet and stuff. and doesn't yell at me when i call him twenty million times. :) lol
last night i got really bored and like, added a bunch of bands from the 90's on myspace. and like, every member of smashmouth. haha :( i'm lame.
this morning my dad called and woke me up. agh. but he invited me out to lunch with him and dennis. so i threw on some clothes and went.
we went to tommy's. i stayed quiet pretty much the whole time. i just went for the free meal, i guess.
he and dennis talked. it was sad, because my dad's getting old. they were talking about how my dad is going to get by during his last however many years..
i've talked to my dad about him dying before, though. he said he's not afraid or anything. so i guess that's good. err.. or is it? :/ i sort of feel like everyone should be afraid, from like, a general standpoint. but then when you start looking at people on a personal level, people that you care about, you just really want them to not be afraid, ever.
i don't know. i really love my daddy. :(
i went home after that. barely got anything done and dan came over. he wanted me to come with him, so i did.
mm. josh called and he, dan, sam, andy and i all went to goodwill.
it was like stepping back in time. i hadn't been to goodwill in foreverrrr.
now i remember why though. i buy everything. :( i spent nine dollars.
i got a lamp, a skirt, a starfish-shaped plate, where's waldo? sheets and gummy worms, though. :) oh oh oh and a thing and you plant this seed and a bean grows and says a fortune on it. :) i just wanna see if it works.
dan got a pen and this ugly shirt.
andy got like, a bunch of big freezie pops and i wanted to get a picture of him with them because it was ridiculous and he was just like "AHHH you guys are so jealous of my freezie pops!" like the whole way home, but he wouldn't let me because he doesn't like being on the internet. :( haha
mm, dan and i fell asleep when we got back because we were both really tired, and i napped while he went to his piano lesson.
when he got home, he made me a couple burritos and i ate and then we watched america's got talent. :)
they put the rappin' granny through.
then we watched project runway. ugh, i love project runway.
there were puppies. it was so cute. :)
uhh.. i don't even know the name of the girl that got kicked off. haha
uli won. her dress was awesome.
so i have a couple new comics up, if you want to check them out.
i'm glad to be keeping up with that again. :)
so everything from this point on in here will be friends only.
comment to be added. :)
credit to meg o'connor for the awesome banner. :D
i'm home now.
today i got up at like, ten to get my picture taken and get my books and stuff.
i didn't end up getting there until like, 11:30.
bought dan with me. :D
saw a bunch of people that i like. we picked a good time to go.
jaren, kiesb, pryce, derek, andrew, jamie, travis, andy koval, cody norton, devin greer, eric noel, craig belpedio.. and just a bunch of cool people like that.
school's not so bad. i like seeing people. i didn't see very many over the summer.
hi, i'm olivia, and i feed off of social interaction. *lame face*
i have history with the kiesb. 8-) geo, history and bio with andrew. and biology with jamie! :D :D :D yaaaay i love classeswithjamie.
zada's sister gave us a ride as far as their house on blemhuber and we walked to dan's from there.
it was hottttt. and we died.
but he carried my backpack. :D what a good boyfriend.
i had to go babysit.
he cried/screamed for like, the first 45 minutes i was there. ugh
then my mom brought us border grill and he watched tv.
dan came over and we played in his room and cleaned and color.
hogan was like "give this marker to dandy" and it was the cutest thing EVER 'cause he meant dan. :)
rah, i love kids.
actually, i think the cutest think ever is when mackenzie said "pinecorn". :D aw. :)
dan left. and i got done like, an hour early.
when i got to dan's, he was on the phone. which made me all pouty and upset. hmph :(
but then he grabbed me and cuddled me. :)
and we rented remember the titans.
and i made him watch it. :)
and we found josh at the movie store. and brought him home with us. :-0
and after they dropped me off, justine called and i was makin' pies and i went to go in my room to see if my grandma made my bed, but the door was locked.
so i went to get a pen to open it and it wouldn't open, which was very unusual.
but the knob like, turned, as though there was something propped against the door. even more unusual.
so then i turned around to get my pies and i heard a little bit of music coming from my room.
so i ran outside.
and justine told me to go to zack's house.
so i did, 'cause terry's light was still on.
and she called the police.
and like, three cop cars came to my house.
with 5 or 6 officers.
and they searched my house, but found nothing.
they got my door open though. :D
so that was kind of exciting.
i was scared though, 'cause my momma wasn't home.
terry came inside and chilled with me in the kitchen 'til justine called back.
my mom got home like, 45 minutes after the police left.
so i'm okay now.
my schedule is as follows:
basic kitchen survival -nault
american lit -vazzeti
geometry 1 -smith
us history -seppanen
spanish 2 -robison
second semester first hour switches to design.
i wanna try and switch from spanish to learning center. we'll see.
comment if we have anything together, i guess.
yesterday was pretty good.
i came here, and dan met me here after like, an hour.
he was listening to a mixed tape i'd made him a long time ago. like a year.
it made me really happy. :D
we walked to get ice cream.
he bought me a cherry sundae.
i like when we buy stuff for eachother, i think it's cute.
i think it feels silly when i call us cute because it's just weird when you call yourself cute, as a couple, you know?
we listened to my mixed tape, and it was good, because i love listening to music with him, and i'd forgotten what was on it.
there was this microphones song, that he was talking about, and the way he described it sounded so familiar, but i couldn't remember for the life of me what it was.
so he rewinded (or really, played the other side, since his tape player has no rewind button) so i could hear, and it was sand (eric's trip) which is one of my favorites, or definately my favorite off of it was hot, we stayed in the water, except maybe the glow, which i'm pretty sure is on there.
then we walked down to the movie theatre and watched march of the penguins.
dan said he liked it a lot and thanked me for taking it. :) i slept through some of it; i was really tired, but what i saw of it was good. it was just like, a penguin documentry, but it was narrated beautifully and it was both cute and informative.
then we sat outside and called jon/justine/matt and went over to matt's house and dan went and played music with jon and matt and i sat and watched tv and ate the peach rings and licorice dan bought me with justine.
some other people came. perry, alisha and matt bullock. we all ended up playing scattagories. it was alright. dan and i were bad at it because we're really shy. jon makes me laugh a lot, but i think i couldn't be in his company for more than an hour or two, because he's creepy. i think i prefer matt's less loud sense of humor to jon's. and justine, of course, is a hoot. i've missed her.
dan and i left after four or five rounds, because we had to bake a cake.
his parents picked us up and dan and i walked from founder's landing to cal's and bought cake mix.
the cashier lady complimented my bowie shirt and said it made her wonder why she's watching the vma's. and i blurted out "oh god! i'm missing the vma's?!"
oh well. i have a diverse musical taste. and i like award shows. :)
we walked to dan's grandma's and visited with her for a while. nice lady. :)
walked up to dan's. the walk was nice and i wish i had had my camera because there was a stump with a face and giant spiders.
our cake turned out lovely. we striped it. dan's dad said it looked carribean. i think jaren will like it.
it's his birthday sometime this month, so dan, neil and i are surprising him with a cake today.
i was going to make him a cd too, but i thought that'd be too creepy.
well, i have to go; we're supposed to be at jaren's by two.
hello, at the library.
kicked out, as a result of being on the computer. *lame face* lol
she doesn't make any sense sometimes.
anyway, yesterday dan and his mommy picked me up after he got done at jon bloom's.
we went home and hung out for a while.
then he had to go to dinner, so i went home and watched loser and ate.
josh called and told us to go see the lavoy boys on wednesday (tomorrow).
they picked me back up and we pretty much just watched tv for the rest of the night.
josh called when i got home to ask about some movies.
i had a bowl of cereal, then called dan.
he'd gotten into a fight with his dad.
his dad's a lot like my mom, i think. in that they're both.. conversationally retarded.
he talked to his mom for a while, and called me back afterwards.
we talked and watched tv until about 2:30.
he called and woke me up this morning, like 15 minutes before my alarm.
i had a dream that i wanted to meet my friends at this restaurant where my cousin and aunt used to work at. it's like, by the prison, on the way to harvey, and it has some weird.. german name. ty-roll-her-off. or something.
i asked my grandma to take me to go pick up dan, then go pick up kyle and bring us there. but she got really mad at me.
eventually we went there, though, kyle, dan and i, but everyone was already gone, so we ended up eating with nathan fortin and his family.
then i saw molly and entonio and some other various people i'm friends with across the street at that grocery store type thing that's always in my dreams.
so we ran over there and i asked molly and justine what they were doing later, and then invited them over.
today dan and i are going to see march of the penguins. he's walking here now.
i've been listening to this white stripes song on repeat for the past two and a half hours.
it reminds me of jaki.
i've also been scanning pictures since i got up.
they're all in my photo gallery.
i woke up 'cause i didn't feel good.
'cause i ate a lot before i went to bed.
i went to bed around 4:30 or 5.
i was listening to matchbox twenty and writin' and guitarin' and such.
it was okay.
sleeping alone is lonely.
i miss sleeping with dan.
last night i had a dream that i was sitting at school with kyle and meg and a female friend of meg's and a male friend of meg's (meg my sister.)
i forget the majority of it.
we were watching a movie, i think. there were people skateboarding in it and i said that one of them looked like my friend, matt (lynch.)
and meg's female friend said it looked much like her friend, conor.
i looked kyle and his head was down, and shaved, and then he looked up and at me, and he had sinead o'connor's face.
i told him he looked good bald, and he should stay that way.
it was all very strange.
yesterday dan and i watched a lot of television.
that's all we did all day.
but it was okay, because i had bad cramps all day.
it was a drag.
my mother broke her ankle.
so, oh, um, i'm home again. jiggity jig.
waiting on her.
last night she made me take out the garbage. ugh
i guess i don't mind it though; i actually secretly really like taking care of people.
if i'm not in a lazy mood.
it makes me feel important.
the night before last i dreamt that jamie picked me up for school in a truck.
and we listened to sum 41.
i remember the song specifically, but don't recall the name.
it's on.. all killer no.. whatever.
she parked in the lot andy was talking about parking his car in this year.
andy drove me home last night, which was kind of cool.
the first time i've been in a car with andy driving, without an adult.
i still feel kind of sick.
and i miss jaki.
I'm at Dan's. He's seeing a concert, with his cousin.
I've been sitting in his room, and dancing some, to the Pixies.
I'm going to do some surveys.
The first I found in Jamie's journal.
|does your boyfriend tell you he loves you?||yes, everyday, like a million times. :D lol|
|does your boyfriend buy you things?||every once in a while he'll buy me ice cream, or something.|
|does your boyfriend tell you you're beautiful/gorgeous?||yeh.|
|does your boyfriend do anything and everything for you?||well, no.|
|does your boyfriend take you places?||i don't like going places. lol|
|does your boyfriend do anything to please you?||yesssss.. :D|
|does your boyfriend rub your stomache when you're cramping?||no, but he would, if i asked.|
|does your boyfriend like to touch you everywhere?||yes! *giggles*|
|does your boyfriend grab your booty in public?||i'm sure it's happened.|
|does your boyfriend kiss you in public?||yes.|
|does your boyfriend say "i love you" in front of everyone?||yeh.|
|does your boyfriend talk to his friends about you?||i'm not sure.|
|does your boyfriend talk about marriage?||on occasion.|
|does your boyfriend tell you he wants you?||yesss.|
|does your boyfriend make you things?||yes! the cutest things ever because it's creative and ridiculous.|
|does your boyfriend write you letters/notes?||yesss.|
|does your boyfriend think you\'re the best thing thats ever happened to h||i don't know. probably not.|
|does your boyfriend make you something to eat?||yes. which i secretly love.|
|does your boyfriend look deep into your eyes?||i guess.|
|does your boyfriend let you drive his car?||he doesn't have one, and i don't think he would, if he did.|
|does your boyfriend have a pet name(s) for you?||nothing gross. he calls me girlfriend, as i call him boyfriend. and darling, dearest, and occasionally sweetie.|
|does your boyfriend hold you when you go to sleep?||yeh, sometimes.|
|does your boyfriend wrap his arms around your waste and kiss your kneck/ear||he may've.|
|does your boyfriend ever help you do your hair?||yes.|
|does your boyfriend watch your favorite show just to make you happy?||yess.|
|does your boyfriend give you money?||rarely.|
|does your boyfriend love you?||yeh. :D|
|What is your name?||Olivia|
|How old are you?||15|
|When is your Birthday?||5.21.90|
|What is your zodiac sign?||gemini|
|Where were you born?||here.|
|Where do you live now?||here.|
|What color eyes do you have?||blueish gray.|
|What color hair do you have?||brown, ish red, with various lighter streaks of faded green.|
|How tall are you?||4'11"|
|How much do you weigh? (Be Honest Ladies)||114|
|What is your race?||er. white.|
|What is your worst fear?||i'm not even.. sure. anymore.|
|Do you smoke?||no.|
|Do you drink?||no.|
|Do you cuss?||occasionally.|
|Do you use drugs?||no.|
|Have you ever or will you ever steal?||i have.|
|Are you dependable and/or trustworthy?||to a certain degree.|
|Do you play in a band or play an instrument?||i play the guitar, occasionally.|
|Do you have any tattoos and/or piercings?||no.|
|If you had a favorite serial killer who would it be?||oh, i don't know.|
|Do you suffer from depression disorder?||oh no.|
|If you had a choice about how you wanted to die what would it be?||i don't know.|
|Have you ever tried to commit suicide?||no.|
|Have you ever purposely caused harm to yourself or someone else?||yes.|
|What subculture do you belong too?||i don't know.|
|Are you evil?||no.|
|Do you believe that you can be possesed?||i don't know, man.|
|Are you a paranoid person?||yeh, i guess.|
|Do you ever get jealous of somebody else?||yeh.|
|Are you obsessive and/or compulsive?||both, mildly.|
|Are you a violent person?||i don't think so.|
|Do you take your anger out on other people?||*sigh* yeh. or, sometimes it appears that way.|
|Do you blame other people for your mistakes?||no.|
|What is your favorite game?||i'm not sure, actually.|
|What is your favorite movie?||ghost world, empire records, donnie darko, wayne's world, as good as it gets, the breakfast club, as well as a variety of others.|
|Who is your favorite band?||mreh. nirvana or hole or the microphones or neutral milk hotel.|
|What is your favorite song?||i felt your shape by the microphones, and lots of others.|
|What kind of books and/or magazines do you read?||i don't know. i don't read much.|
|What is your favorite color?||i like.. them all.|
|What is your favorite food?||i'm not sure.|
|What is your favorite drink?||i don't know.|
|Do you own a pari of converse?||no.|
|Do you own a pair of dickies?||no.|
|Would you ever kill yourself or someone else?||probably not. i don't think i could ever kill anyone.|
|Are you a virgin?||yes.|
|Are you kinky?||naw.|
|Do you like biting?||no.|
|Do you masturbate?||yes, but not very often anymore.|
|Do you watch pornography?||i don't know. like, not by myself. if a bunch of people are sitting around watching it, i will too, you know.|
|Have you ever dyed your hair an unusual color?||yeh.|
|Have you ever shaved your head in a socially unacceptable way?||no.|
|Are you hyper active person?||no.|
|Are you religious?||no.|
|Do you have any self inflicted scars?||naw.|
|Does pain turn you on?||no.|
|Do you stand for originality and creativity?||um. okay.|
|Do you like meeting new people?||mreh. if they aren't.. older girls.|
|What do you like most about life?||those moments when everything feels really perfect.|
|What do you dislike most about life?||when things don't go my way.|
|Do you believe in love at first fright?||i don't know. isn't that sight?|
|Have you ever pierced a body part yourself?||no.|
|Have you ever had to beg for dinner money?||no.. well, maybe.|
|Do you own a car?||no.|
|Have you been to jail, yet?||no.|
|Are your clothes held together with safety pins?||no.|
|Do you have actual scars from punk rock shows?||no.|
|Have you ever vomit while making out?||no.|
|Have you held a job for less than a day?||no.|
|Do you own more than two pair of jeans?||mreh.. no.|
|Have you ever had to fuck stuff up for no good reason?||reh. yes.|
|Have you ever been kicked out of your parents house?||yes.|
|Have you ever been fired from your job because of your attitude?||no.|
|Does the world piss you off?||occasionally.|
It probably was a bad idea to read Dan's journal before updating this.
(As now I'm in a bad mood.)
Yesterday was okay, I guess.
I don't remember much of yesterday, either.
Even with his relatives here, every day really seems to the same, to me.
He let me borrow his Pixies' CD, along with one of Andy's CD players.
I danced a lot in the mirror to the Pixies last night.
I like to dance, and really hate that organ of mine that hurts badly when I dance too hard.
Dan and I argued on the phone last night, again.
It's frustrating that he thinks that I can and would boldly lie to him.
I forget if I told you yesterday, but it was our five month anniversary. Um, yay, right? What a joke.
I got my period last night in my sleep, so I woke up all bloody-legged and such.
I made my Dad listen to the Pixies this morning; he said they were alright, and sounded a little like David Bowie.
I'm listening to them now.
On the way here, Van Halen was on both the bear and 98.3. So I changed it to the oldies station and my Dad death glared and changed it to like, 97.1, which turned out okay because they played Real World by Matchbox Twenty and Black Balloon by the Goo Goo Dolls.
I love both of those bands, but haven't listened to them in a long time.
I saw Jason walking down fourth street, which was strange to me, because it's rare to see him outside of his room, as he sits in there and plays video games all day and basically rots.
That's what I'd like to do right now. Rot.
yesterday i walked over to dan's after here.
actually, i don't remember yesterday at all.
only that we went bowling.
which was alright.
i liked my bowling shoes.
and wish i had some to wear all the time.
dan and i got into an argument later that night on the phone.
only that's not what it felt like, because i wasn't mad at him.
it was just all really dumb, but then evolved into some big thing.
but um. i'm not going to write about it in here because people are really immature and think they know what they're talking about and think that i'm unhappy when i'm actually not and the only thing that's making me unhappy is all the stupid drama people feel like starting with me because they're jerks.
last night i dreamt about a puppy.
i don't think dan's awake yet; he was supposed to call when he woke up.
i didn't get to bed until like, 5. but uhh. i got up at 11:30 to catch a ride with my dad.
he dropped me off at my mom's and she showered me with gifts from new mexico. like a bracelet and a bear necklace and two pretty skirts and FUDGE! :D
i'm really tired, but oh well.
micah e-mailed me. it was nice to hear from him.
i think i've grown up a lot.
lol growing up kind of sucks, but oh well.
yesterday was good.
despite dan being mad at me.
i called jaki and wrote here.
until dan stopped being mad.
i bought him gifts at cal's.
and when i got there, we watched lingo with sammy and andy and tim.
tim's nice, and got me a chair to sit on.
i'm weird, though, and don't know how to react to niceness.
we went outside and watched sam and andy trampoline.
um. stuff. i spilled a bunch of milk.
we all went inside and sam and andy played video games.
i painted dan's nails.
dan and i spent time alone.
and then watched shallow hal with all of them.
mrs. lawrence drove us home and stuff.
i really hate people at the library who don't know how to use computers.
josh called this morning to see if dan and i wanted to hang out.
he's leaving tomorrow. for his cousin's wedding.
we were thinkin about going to the beach, but it's only like 70 degrees today.
dan's at some finnish craft thing. *weird face* lol
so you basically heard everything about yesterday, i guess.
i talked on the phone with dan for a long time last night.
until i fell asleep.
i don't think danny or jess even knew i was home, or that i left this afternoon.
i walked to the hospital, to visit my grandma
i sort of like going there and finding whoever i'm visiting's room.
it's like a mini adventure, sort of.
in a totally sick morbid way.
my grandma looks good.
she doesn't like jessica much i don't think, she always rants about her to me.
then i walked to jack's.
i got a spiral notebook, sprite and a back of fried chicken.
i walked up here and sat at the picnic table and ate my fried chicken.
as i was walking down third street, i was thinking, "hm, it looks like there might be a parade." as there were several old people sitting along the streets in lawn chairs.
and sure enough, when i got to the library, there was the parade, being formed.
oh, it's great, and i wish i had my camera.
as i was eating my fried chicken, molly and kyle came over.
they were waiting for entonio to get done with driver's ed.
i talked to them for a while, about the silliness of this whole parade.
they wanted me to walk with them to the upfront and company to look at a room, and i walked with them part of the way, but then realized it was a bad idea.
i walked with mostly molly, i guess, because kyle took a shortcut that molly didn't feel like taking.
i like molly.
i saw justine and matt and chased their car and asked them for a ride up the hill, then realized how silly that sounds. lol
now i'm here, at the library.
dan just called, he's done canoeing, but he's mad at me, and said maybe we can hang out later.
i hope he realizes that no matter how mad he is, i'm walking over there when i'm done here.
i love him.
here's a survey.
[CLOTHING BRAND:] i don't know.
[SHOE BRAND:] i don't know.
[SPORT TO PLAY:] tennis.
[DRINK:] doctor pepper.
[MOVIE:] oh, i have a lot.
W H O
[makes you laugh the most?]: justine or entonio.
[makes you smile]: dan.
[has a crush on you?]: dan, i'd hope.
[easiest to talk to]: dan.
D O Y O U E V E R
[save aol/aim conversations]: no.
[wish you were a member of the opposite sex]: when i'm ovulating, or bleeding, i suppose.
H A V E Y O U E V E R
[fallen for your best friend]: yes.
[been rejected]: yes.
[rejected someone}: i'd imagine.
[been cheated on]: i hope not.
[done something you regret]: i guess not.
W H O W A S T H E L A S T P E R S O N
[you talked to on the phone]: dan.
[you instant messaged]: andy.
[you laughed with]: molly.
D O Y O U / / A R E Y O U
[smoke cigarettes]: no.
[how many peeps are on your buddylist?]: haven't a clue.
[what's your favorite food?]: i'm not sure.
[whats your favorite fruit?]: i don't know.
[drink alcohol?]: no.
[like watching sunrises or sunset]: both, yes.
[what hurts the most?]: ah, i don't know.
[trust others way too easily?]: perhaps.
N U M B E R
[of times I have had my heart broken? ]: lots.
[of hearts u have broken?]: dan told me last night that something i did broke his heart, and i like. died.
[of tight friends?]: i'm not sure. three, at least. four, i guess, counting josh.
[of cd's that I own?:] lots.
[of scars on my body ?]: i don't know.
P I C K O N E
[MARRY PERFECT FRIEND OR PERFECT LOVER]: both!
[CATS OR DOGS]: cats.
[1 PILLOW OR 2]: both.
[W/ OR W/O ICE CUBES]: pepsi, with ice.
[WINTER/SPRING/SUMMER/FALL]: not winter.
[NIGHT OR DAY:] day.
[GLOVES OR MITTENS:] gloves.
[BUNK OR WATER BED:] neither.
[MTV OR VH1:] both.
[OCEAN OR POOL:] mreh. i don't care.
[SHOWERS OR BATHS:] showers.
[LOVE OR LUST:] love.
[DIAMONDS OR PEARLS:] pearls.
I F Y O U C O U L D
[Move anywhere:] i'm not sure.
[Meet one famous person:] i don't know.
[Live with one person the rest of your life:] daniel, certainly.
[Name one thing you love:] boyfriend.
[Name one thing that embarrasses you:] when boyfriend crawls down the hallway. *sigh*
[Do you like school?] no.
[Do you like to talk on the telephone?] sometimes.
i'm going to go call dan and ask if i can come over. *sigh*
stuff's been good, i guess.
i'm at dog face's. :D
he's behind me.
mumbling about technology.
we just played a few games of scrabble.
with mavin. :-0
he/she is hardcore.
mimi beat her once.
it sounds like we a lot of imaginary friends, but we really don't.
i've been hanging out around dan's a lot.
with his cousins.
i like his cousin tim okay.
he likes colorado, and i do not.
meg would agree, i think, as i believe she is a wings fan(?)
love you meg. :D (o'connor)
"what's a meg o'connor?"
".. my friend. :D"
"is she real?"
and of course i love dan, too.
my grandma's in the hospital.
my uncle paul came and got her last night.
at like 4.
and i cried a lot.
and called my mommy.
and then i had to go wake up danny. ugh
i miss my dad. :(
now i'm just living with danny and jess.
and it's scary and sucks.
and the toilet doesn't work. :( :( :(
time for a survey! KAPOW!
hair color: brown.
skin color: pale.
eye color: blue.
r i g h t n o w
what color pants are you wearing? i'm not wearin' any.
what song are you listening to?: santeria.
what taste is in your mouth?: IWANTTRIX. *mad face* entonio's being a bitchface. :(
how do you feel?: kind of anxious, but happy.
d o y o u
get motion sickness?: yes.
have a bad habit?: yes.
How about a nervous habit?: yes.
get along with your parents?: sometimes, my dad most of the time.
f a v o r i t e s
book: eh. that one i read about courtney killing kurt.
non alcoholic drink: eh. dr. pepper.
thing to do on the weekend: i don't know. hang out with dan and stuff.
h a v e y o u
broken the law: yeh.
snuck out of the house: yeh.
made a prank phone call: yeh.
skipped school before: yeh.
been in a school or church play: yeh.
l o v e
current crush: angelina jolie.
been in love: yeh.
Had your heart broken: yeh.
Broken someone elses heart: maybe.
had a hard time getting over someone: yes.
r a n d o m
your cd player has in it right now: i haven't a clue. black eyed peas is in t dogg's.
what makes you happy?: dan and entonio and my friends.
w h e n / w h a t w a s t h e l a s t..
time you cried: last night.
you got e-mail: recently. dan sent me one.
thing you purchased: a pizza? knee high socks?
movie you watched: mr. jealousy.
y o u r t h o u g h t s o n
teenage smoking: whateva'. it's a waste of money.
[NUMBER]: i don't know.
[SUBJECT:] english.lesbian ed pee. again. movers mo-ped fallopian tubers .::.ooppoo.::. sherry o'connor
i'll do the rest tomorrow.
so this has turned into more and more of a personal thing.
because i'm out of pages in my notebook, and probably won't start a new one until school starts.
so forgive anything displeasing. please.
i don't remember if saturday was recalled.
i believe that was the day dan and i went shopping at the mall.
pants don't fit me. i have no legs. it's lame.
we met up with josh, krah and neil. went to the beach.
hung out with josh after.
yesterday i was sick all day.
dan and i watched jawbreaker.
which is wonderful.
rose mcgowen is beautiful.
then i fell asleep.
then we went to the beach and met josh and andrea.
but they basically ignored us.
so we snuck away while they weren't looking.
last night dan and i talked on the phone for a while.
then i went to sleep in my bed around 2:30.
but woke up back in the chair?
i don't know, it was weird.
i dreamt that i was exchanging gifts with luke.
and he got me something really crappy.
and i got him something cool.
i don't know, it was a kind of lame dream.
i called him, in my dream, to ask what he got me, but i couldn't figure it out.
but it was awkward, and sucked.
and dan was giving me dirty looks.
in my dream.
this morning i went to his house.
we hung out.
his cousins and stuff are coming into town today.
exciting, kind of.
whatever. i'm ovulating.
tomorrow i think i'm gonna hang out with entonio for 2 or 3 hours.
after driver's ed, at like 5.
he's going to a family reunion soon, so i wanna hang out with him before.
and dan's going to see that finnish guy from jefferson airplane.
justine and matt are too.
justine called last night.
i talked to her for a while.
mostly just her talking about matt.
which is okay.
i'm happy for her.
my grandma's picking me up, after this. and giving me a ride over to dan's.
yay. :D i love my boyfriend.
so my parents left for new mexico yesterday.
my dad picked me up from here and we stopped by the bar to see my mom.
said goodbye and stuff and she gave me 200 dollars for school clothes.
went home for dinner.
he gave me a ride to dan's house and i said goodbye to him and stuff.
uh, i don't know.
dan and i hung out.
sam and andy came downstairs and hung out with us.
sammy called a bunch of fast food restaurants to see if they served pepsi and coke products.
dan and i decided to bet on it. i wanted to bet 5 dollars, but he'd only bet 2.
i won. :D
me and dan went to shopko.
we picked out a bunch of clothes for eachother to try on.
he picked out a bunch of gross slutface girl clothes for me. :(
it was silly. i looked silly.
he looked sillier, probably. in the dumb clothes he tried on.
i bought some underwear and a green sweater.
and we went home and played a weird board game with andy..
i just e-mailed claire.
we've been e-mailing.
i like her a lot.
she reminds me of micah, or i have the same sort of relationship with her that i do with micah.
i sort of miss his male perspective on my life.
i wonder how he and meg are.
i liked shopping with dan a lot yesterday.
and we went and got ice cream after.
i think i'm making him go to the mall today.
kohl's and jc penny's are having sales.
but they close at 6, so i wanna get there soon.
the computers at the library are limited to one hour per person for fin fest.
um, i don't get it? lol
justine called last night and told me about her trip.
she sounds so happy and i'm happy for her.
matt's good for her.
i think she, matt, dan and i will/should/may hang out soon.
and justine and i too.
a sleep over in her new room.
and something about cheese and chips. :D lol
i'm gonna go call dan.
and if you feel, i stole this from salmela girl:
1. Reply and I will write something random about you.
2. I will tell you what song/movie reminds me of you.
3. I will say something that only makes sense to you and me.
4. I will tell you my first memory of you.
5. I will tell you what animal you remind me of.
6. I'll then tell you something that I've always wondered about you.
i'm having horrific luck with solitaire today.
do any of you remember mrs. miller?
that dreadful lunch lady from elementary school.
she's a librarian.
i recognized her voice, and plump body shape.
and squished, red face.
she was always very mean, particularly to justine.
justine, who is nowhere, but maybe south carolina.
and there's a woman who very closely resembles mrs. mccormick to my left.
yesterday was spent like every other.
only not really.
i walked to my mom's, and used her computer, as i told you.
i made a cd, as i told you, too.
my grandma came and got me and we went to the dollar tree and i bought picture frames for my sister.
i framed some pictures of us when we were little, for her birthday.
i'm sending them with my dad; he and my mom are leaving tonight to go see her.
i almost regret not going.
a free trip to new mexico would've been wonderful.
if i wasn't so afraid of boyfriend cheating on me and i didn't hate my mom so much, i definately would've gone.
i think i would've, if it were just my dad.
i got to dan's around 5.
i made him listen to the cd, but i don't think he liked it much.
he was dumb to me, because he thought i was being dumb.
it was stupid.
so my mom picked me up.
she wanted to talk with me, and offered me border grill.
i don't think i would've accepted, but i felt like i needed to be away from boyfriend for an hour.
it went okay.
i like food.
she said a few harsh things that made my insides tighten.
one being: "so you have it pretty good at your grandma's, huh?.. rides to dan's whenever you want. you're hardly even home, only for dinner!"
and the other was her mentioning seeing entonio walking, and stopping to talk to him.
i can't remember what day he leaves, but i'd like to hang out with him before he goes.
it's only like, the fifth, and i don't think he lefts until the.. 10th, or sometime after that.
perhaps sometime this coming week.
i went back to dan's and we watched who wants to be a millionaire with sam and andy.
i'm glad she's back, andy looks so much happier.
and we played jenga. it's fun, but it sucks. a lot. lol
jaki called us, but dan was being a savage, and was preying on my body. :x ugh. we talked to her a little, but i'm so shy with phone conversations and so is dan so it was short.
i miss her, we gots cards in the mail from her.
she's visiting in september, but i'm not sure we'll even get to see her.
dinner's not until 3 or 3:30, but i don't feel like sitting here for another hour.
i wanna say bye to my dad though, so i wanna go home.
i don't want him to leave. at all.
jessica's due with the baby in less than two weeks.
clay's here for the weekend, jessica's kid, and jarrett, who's eight, and my grandma's babysitting him.
i've known him since he was a little baby. :D
danny's going to be thirty this year, i can't believe it.
this morning i dyed a couple parts of my hair green.
i have that song from the scene in empire records where mark watches the gwar video.
not the song from the video. but the whiney one they play while the band's telling mark to join. lol
i'm at home, crafting a cd.
yesterday me and dan mainly watched tv again.
but this time without andy.
i went out to dinner with my parents.
which was better than i expected.
i like my dad a lot.
and they didn't attack me. :D
i don't feel like writing in this.
so here's my track listing:
1. flagpole sitta -harvey danger
2. breakfast in america -supertramp
3. what's the frequency kenneth? -rem
4. doctor my eyes -jackson browne
5. bang a gong -t rex
6. spirit in the sky -norman greenbaum
7. california dreamin' -the mamas and the papas
8. one headlight -the wallflowers
9. december -collective soul
10. london calling -the clash
11. rocket man -elton john
12. time of the season -the zombies
13. the logical song -supertramp
14. for your love -the yardbirds
15. love song -the cure
16. white rabbit -jefferson airplane
17. benny and the jets -elton john
18. maggie may -rod stewart
19. all the young dudes -mott the hoople
20. redemption song -bob marley and the wailers
man, i suck.
like. whenever i see people i used to be pretty good friends with and they don't say hi to me, it puts me in a bad mood and i hate them.
and i just saw kelly jutila and didn't say hi.
i guess i just didn't know how.
i haven't talked to her in a really long time.
but she's such a nice girl and i love her.
i just saw jessica daignault and alicia barlett too.
i'm at the library.
yesterday dan and i just sat around and watched game shows again.
andy got his license, but he wouldn't drive us anywhere.
he said he might today.
we wanna go to burger king and mcdonalds to see if they serve both pepsi and coke products.
i'm pretty sure they don't, but dan's pretty sure they do.
dinner got cancelled yesterday, so i'm going today, in about an hour and a half.
dan's here at the library with me. somewhere.
i'm gonna go find him.
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