murder me beautiful's Blurty Entries [rants|esse's|signings]
murder me beautiful

[ user | info ]
[ # of | rants ]

[may 16th 2003|6:01pm]
[ mood | sick ]
[ music | eddie money - take me home tonite ]

i haven't updated in a few. haven't been feeling good so i decided to take a rest from the wonders that is blurty. i saw "matrix: reloaded" early, and holy shit did it rock me good. keanu reeves fucked some fools up. i want to be in a movie like that. but it will never happen, as much as i want it to. any type of action movie would be rad to be in as long as i was a bad ass tuff guy. i want to fuck some fools up too. just like keanu. but anyway, tonite is going to be a real man's nite out. when in doubt, go bowling. so i am. then i don't know what after that. then tomorrow nite, it's show time. total metalcore/brutal beatdown show. we're supposed to fuck some fool up there after all my friends bands get done playing. it should be fun, and i get away with (as long as i don't injure him too bad) it because i'm still not legal! hahaha fuck you law! since i am a black belt in taekwondo, if i hurt that fool too bad, i'll go to jail. and that ain't fun. so i'm going to go hit up my friend's house now and i'll talk to you later. <3 xoxo

1 lover left bleeding

[may 13th 2003|4:15pm]
[ mood | irate ]
[ music | 18 v - russianroulettewithatriggerhappymanicdepressent ]

i feel like stabbing someone. any volunteers? do you ever get that feeling where you just want to hurt anyone who makes you mad at all? i'm in that mood. so how about someone gets their fucking asses over here and i hurt them? come on. i just want to get out all my anger and frusteration. fuck people. fuck you. fuck him. fuck her. fuck that guy over there. fuck that person. fuck the whole god damned human race. except for a select few who can still make me happy through thick and thin. they know who they are. so yeah, i'm done fucking pretending to like people. from now on, if i don't like a person and they piss me off i'm going to tell them to fucking go to hell. i'm sick of it. i don't want to try to be happy for people anymore, it just isn't worth the god damn effort. so to everyone, i leave you with a high and mighty, FUCK YOU.

5 lovers left bleeding

[may 12th 2003|9:20pm]
[ mood | mischievous ]
[ music | 18 v ]

Vanity

And I wonder?
Where do you get your inspiration?
Where do you find your motivation?
And what motivates me to hold your hand?
And I don’t want you to see all these things hid.
When you were holding my hand I didn’t think I’d die.
And I wonder?
Why do you make that midnight drive-by?
When you left me out to hang dry?
Well this rope is tightening
and I don’t want you to see all these things I hide.
When you were holding my hand I didn’t think I’d die.
Yeah. Yeah.
You couldn’t tell me that this was the best that you could do.
And now you’ve left me to hang here all alone.
And she waits for me.
In her Sunday dress laced with pink and white.
You shouldn’t have shut me out.
When you’re the one that changed your mind.
You could’ve change your mind.
While I was sitting here alone.
If you should die before you ask me. . . .how am I?
If you should die before you ask me. . . .for my life.
If you should die before you ask me. . . .if I’d die.
If I’d die with you.
She’s innocent but she’s got a gun yeah.
She’ll hand it over and then she’ll run yeah.
I’ll pull the trigger. Yeah.
I’ll pull the trigger. Yeah.
I’ll shoot her up. Yeah.
I’ll shoot her up bang.
I want you plastic perfection.
I want to see your vanity.
I want you sexy psychotic so I can see your lunacy.
And I wonder?
Where do you get your inspiration?
Where do you find your motivation?
And what motivates me to hold your hand?
Sweetness. . . This isn’t working.
I thought the breath that you’d bring would give me life. Yeah.
And she’s a mellow dramatic.
She that that I was romantic, but then the gun went off.
And now I’ve left you to bleed here all alone.
And I look so beautiful.
In her Sunday dress laced with pink and white.

<3 xoxo

bleeding

[may 12th 2003|5:19pm]
[ mood | amused ]

so i'm bored, so i started talking to smartbot while i was on the phone with pam. it's funny. so here it is.

smartbot is fun. )

bleeding

[may 11th 2003|8:30pm]
[ mood | dirty ]
[ music | the faint - your retro career melted ]

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY TO ALL THE MOMMYS! ESPECIALLY ONE IN PARTICULAR! so anyway, i hope mama's day is going good for all you kids out there. get your mommy's something good. i know i did. i got her me. 18 years ago. haha. i'm a present that lasts a lifetime. so anyway, i don't really have anything else to talk about, i just wanted to say happy mothers day. <3 xoxo

bleeding

[may 10th 2003|3:50pm]
[ mood | pessimistic ]

life = shitty and boring and a complete and total waste of time.

if you agree, post a comment. if you don't, post a comment telling me how dumb i am and to quit my insessive whining and to go to hell. but remember, i'll see you there. <3 xoxo

bleeding

[may 9th 2003|10:26pm]
[ mood | bored ]
[ music | comic remix ]

i'm really bored. i'm fucking bored. fuck. fuck. fuck. i'm supposed to be out right now. why the fuck am i not? i'll tell you why not. because no one knows how to call when they are fucking asked to. that's why. so fuck. everyone is out at a party of some sort. except me. see i'm at home alone. but i passed the time by watching the movie "dick". it's actually really funny, if you understand watergate. i want a cigarette but chase made me quit. damn you chase. i should kick you. like in the throat. i'm shaking. but anyway, i'm watching something on comedy central called "comic remix" and it's all these old things on comics and the funny things they say. it's really cool. all the funniest things. i don't really have much else to say. sorry everyone. <3 xoxo

1 lover left bleeding

[may 8th 2003|9:54pm]
[ mood | sore ]
[ music | tom green - piggy hill ]

here it is:

::Have You Ever::

1. Kissed your cousin?: i only have 3 cousins and they are all guys. so no.
2. Ran away?: once, i didn't get very far, my sister turned me in.
3. Pictured your crush naked?: haha i think everyone does.
4. Actually seen your crush naked?: once or twice.
5. Broken someone's heart?: i think i have. she said i did, but who knows. she had a new boyfriend 3 days later.
6. Been in love?: when i find it, i'll say yes.
7. Cried when someone died?: who doesn't?
8. Wanted someone you knew you couldn't have?: pssssh, yeah, like right now.
9. Broken a bone?: haha have i?! many times. many bones.
10. Drank alcohol?: come one. the previous entry is about going to a party. and yes, i am.
11. Lied?: yeah, i have.
12. Cried in school?: once. when my uncle died and people were making jokes about it. fucking assholes.

::Which is Better::

13. Coke or Pepsi?: pepsi. no doubt.
14. Sprite or 7UP?: 7-up. less carbonation.
15. Girls or guys?: girls.
16. Flowers or candy?: um i think flowers are pretty. especially pansy's. hahaha losers.
17. Scruffy or clean shaven?: i only shave my "mustache". other stuff doesn't really grow fast.
18. Quiet or loud?: it depends on the mood.
19. Blondes or brunettes?: brunettes rock the house.
20. Nice or playas?: shit nigga. who you think you is?
21. Tall or short?: short girls.
22. Pants or boxers?: i don't wear underwear. FREE, FREE BALLIN'!

::With the Opposite Sex::

23. What do you notice first?: shoes, hair and eyes.
24. Last person you slow danced with?: fuck if i know.
25. Worst question to ask?: i don't get this question.
26. Last person you showered with?: me?
27. Had a great time with the oppostie sex?: of course. i do have SOME friends who are of the female sex.

::What is::

28. Your good luck charm?: my watch haha
29. The person you hate the most?: haha this thing isn't long enough.
30. The best thing that happened to you today?: i fixed my journal.

::Favorite::

31. Color(s)?: black and pink. pink is the new black.
32. Movie(s)?: i don't feel like typing them all, but "x-2" really rocked me.
33. Book(s)?: the great gatsby, tender is the night.
34. Subject in school?: english.
35. Ice cream?: cookies n cream
36. Holiday?: fuck, who cares? haha
37. Season?: winter.
38. Breakfast food?: pop tarts. or marshmellow matey's.
39. Place to go on your honeymoon?: where ever she wants.

::Who::

40. Makes you laugh the most?: dylan, defenitly. "FUCK YOU FERNANDO!" "FUCK YOU TOO CEASAR!"
41. Makes you smile?: pam.
42. Gives you a funny feeling when you see them?: well i get a funny feeling in my crotch when we go down a steep hill in a car...
43. Has a crush on you?: she loves him, and he loves her, and she loves somebody else, you just can't win...
44. Do you have a crush on?: Hot hot heat. <--- i agree pam.
45. Can make you feel better no matter what?: defenitly david and dylan. those fools rule.
46. Is easier to talk to, guys or girls?: girls. totally. they can tell me how crappy they are.

::Do you ever::

47. Sit by the phone waiting for a call all night?: well not sit by it, but i do await calls a lot.
48. Save AOL conversations?: only if they are really important.
49. Save E-Mails?: i read them and as long as they are journal notifications or junk mail, i save them incase i need them later. why you so damn curious anyway!?
50. Wish you were someone else?: sometimes. well actually, always.
51. Wish you were a member of the oppostie sex?: no way, i could never handle a period. big props girls.
52. Cried because of someone's mean words?: yeah, once. it was harsh. you'd have to know what i'm talking about.

::Best::

54. Perfume?: i don't like perfume. it smells and gives me a headache.
55. Kiss?: well i can't know it's the best until i die, then i'll say, "that kiss was the best with ____."
56. Romantic memory?: uh, no. fuck you.
57. Most recent advice given to you?: that, well, um, i don't get advice. i only give it. it's not fair.
58. Fallen for your best friend?: no. i don't have one.
59. Made out with "just a friend"?: once. it screwed things up.

::Have you ever::

61. Been in love?: apparently not.
62. Been in lust?: of course.
63. Used someone?: no.
64. Been used?: no.
65. Been cheated on?: yeah. quite a few times.
66. Been kissed?: nope, never.
67. Done something you regret?: yeah. i have.
68. What is it?: people.

3 lovers left bleeding

[may 8th 2003|9:04pm]
[ mood | crazy ]
[ music | watching the wild/canucks game ]

so i finally fixed it... although i need help with figuring out how to make those date bars smaller or delete them, if anyone knows how, please inform me. thanks. anyway, in other news. i quit smoking. for chase. he bribed me. i don't know how long it will last. it's hard. i have the shakes. i can't hold still. but i'm not addicted. just don't talk about cigarettes or i'll kill you. thank you. so, party tomorrow at this girl cheyna's house. it's like 5 bucks, but i get in free... i hope. anyway, i'm really bored and what not so i'm going to ramble. a lot. the nhl playoffs are working out happily for me. if minnesota wins, i will have all the final 4 teams right. i perdicted anaheim and ottawa in the playoffs. we'll see what happens. minnesota is losing right now 2-1 with 14:10 left in the 3rd period. i hope they can do it. walz is going to score to tie it and then hendrickson or park will score the game winner with like 2 minutes left in the game. but that's just a guess. we'll see if it happens. school is sucking. i got some career project for my english class and my fucking teacher won't let me do a comedic actor because she doesn't believe can get a hold of one. so i picked high school english teacher instead. damn actors and their preppy ass agencies and millions of dollars. damn actors shouldn't think they are so fucking special. i'll be an actor one day. i want to play a part as either a dirty druggie funny guy, or just a plain dirty druggie. either or. as long as people think i'm a bad ass. haha. like hugh jackman in x-2. fuck man, he was cool in that movie. the burns and the tight pants. god how i envy his burns and tight pants. he pulls it off so fucking well. professor of art. ha! yeah, but anyway, i'm going go stay with my sister for memorial day weekend. i can't wait. she is so cool, i love that girl so much. i hope everything works out with her and her roommate since her roommate is going into rehab for crack. haha. i'm going to try to see about going up there a lot, but she lives almost 3 hours away. it's hard. she lives in L.A. and i pretty much live in san diego. it's just hard. she comes and visits a lot though and we can hang out all the time too when she does. her friends are my friends. they love to have me around because i'm "a fucking crack up" so they say. one of her friends said he'd give me 200 bucks if i streaked at grad. we'll see what happens... haha fuck man, i hope i can go to chris's party in san diego on saturday. i've really been wanting to. poor david, he's so sad. i'm comforting him. the girl of his dreams said there is too much drama right now, which i feel is a cheap cope out. what do you all think? agreed huh? ah man, i gotta go help him out so this is where i call it quits. expect some sort of survey soon. bye bye kids. <3 xoxo

bleeding

[may 8th 2003|4:41pm]
[ mood | frustrated ]
[ music | the get up kids - my apology ]

The Dante's Inferno Test has banished you to the Fifth Level of Hell!
Here is how you matched up against all the levels:
LevelScore
Purgatory (Repenting Believers)Very Low
Level 1 - Limbo (Virtuous Non-Believers)Very Low
Level 2 (Lustful)Moderate
Level 3 (Gluttonous)Very High
Level 4 (Prodigal and Avaricious)High
Level 5 (Wrathful and Gloomy)Extreme
Level 6 - The City of Dis (Heretics)Low
Level 7 (Violent)Extreme
Level 8- the Malebolge (Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers)Very High
Level 9 - Cocytus (Treacherous)High

Take the Dante's Inferno Test

so there i am, gloomy and violent. i already knew that. come on. tell me somethingi didn't know. geez. [edit] if anyone knows how to work on journals, and make it so that i can get a background pic and save it that way without going back to the normal way, let me know. thanks. [edit] <3 xoxo

bleeding

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