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Raven's Journal


29 Apr 2003|03:36pm
new website! cross post from livejournal.
[ mood | creative ]

i'm making a new website. It will be very different from the ones i normally make, why?
because this one doesn't feature porn or anything that seems like porn. No naked chics, no fingerwhore, nothing,...this will be about the other side of me.
so as of right now, i'm taking pics of all my friends, and you will be featured on my site.
so please, if you want me to put you on there, then send me 1 pic of you, that you like to my email.
BlueStarJaded@yahoo.com
i will work on friends pics til i get back, after that, if your not on there, i'm not adding you, cause thats gives you a whole week to get pics to me.
I would really like to add most of you!!!!
soo HURRY SEND ME PICS!!! lol

prick me


27 Apr 2003|02:42pm
meow
[ mood | amused ]

i guess its time for an update huh?
yeah we've been busy alot lately, and i haven't really had alot of time to update.
I haven't even been on my webcam, i can't even remember the last time.
so yeah, been thinking, about either making another site, and linking "FingerWhore" to it, or renaming my site.
allen's mom got a glance of it the other day, and while she found it so funny, the name,....i found it very hard to explain, why i called it "FingerWhore", and why allen calls me that. lol
yeah.
so i don't know, just some thoughts.
here is something i posted today in my livejournal. I found this amusing.

the cat woke me up crying and scratching on the door, cause she was hungry.
I got up and fed her, and went back to sleep.
3 hours later, when me and allen woke up, he told me that from now on when hes hungry hes gonna, meow, and claw at the wall.
He gave me an example.
I think in all my sleepiness, i laughed til i almost cried,...it was so funny.

prick me


13 Apr 2003|12:16am
money?
[ mood | annoyed ]

i now have a paypal account.
why? i don't know, just to have one, and because well i hope to be getting paid eventually for doing websites.
my only problem is, i don't know how to link it to my site =(
if anyone out there, knows anything about this, please reply to this post! Thanks!

In other news, i was gonna join a webring, so that my site could get more traffic, and what not, but after reading the rules, i got a little annoyed.
there are 2 reasons, as to why i can't be in there.
1. Cause i don't have my own domain. ( which is stupid, cause i go through brinkster, and there are no ads, banners, or popups, so its like my own domain)
~ And ~
2. Because i have Porn on my site. ( this again i feel is stupid, cause i think you should be able to have whatever you want on your on personal site.)

its annoys me that people find porn so taboo, why?
because it just shows how insecure they are about themselves, and their relationship, if they can't deal with that.

so yeah you can say i'm a little annoyed about this,..but whatever,...i'm not gonna sweat it.

Tomorrow, we are leaving for the cities, i won't be back til tuesday sometime.
I have some more ideas for my site, and i am now finished with Katrina's site, so i can add little things here and there to mine.

The thing i have in mind, is a "Quotes" section. This will feature, various quotes from songs, that i LOVE, things said that inspire me, and make me love the song.
I realize this will take a while to do,..but hey,..i have nothing else to do now.

4 thorns - prick me


12 Apr 2003|03:39am
Glitter
[ mood | crappy ]
[ music | Kris's Music lol ]

i never really realized how hard it is to have a "public" journal. I've had my other livejournal for so long and it being so private, that i hardly know what to write in a public one, without offending anyone,..lol
Today was kinda boring, got woken up my our stupid ass neighbors dog. It was barking all afternoon, since her stupid ass tied it to the fence, next to our window and left.
So it barked all afternoon. Talked to suspend eariler in the day online, and watched her on webcam for a while.
Took a shower, put makeup on and then me and allen went shopping for him some headphones, so he can listen to music while he paints, and then to the store to get something to eat for tonight.
Later on, i worked on blackened_tears website, that i've been doing for her, and i'll have it done by tomorrow, i only like a few more links. I wanna have it done before we leave for the cities, sunday.
I went on webcam eariler too, but i got bored as hell with that, and i left soon after, to watch TV.
i feel like crap, i keep getting this weird feeling in my head.
its like a headache, but it kinda makes me dizzy and sick to my stomach. =(
I hate you PMS.
Oh yeah, i'm gonna start listing all the mp3's i download.
Why? I don't know, something to do.
so heres the "new list"
1.Eminem - Superman
2.12 Stones - Broken
3.Bon Jovi - Misunderstood
4.Cher - I found someone
5.Evanescence - Bring me to life
6.Evanescence - My Immortal
7.JayZ - Bonnie and Clyde ( me and my girlfriend)
8.Nelly - hot in Herre
9.Nelly - Ride with me
10.PAntera - Live- Ozzfest
11.Theory of a deadman - Make up your mind
12.Triple Six mafia - Ass and titties ( memphis rappers yo, you better represent!)
13.Unwritten Law -Seein' Red

so yeah,...
later, biotches.

prick me


11 Apr 2003|04:00am
Link update.
[ mood | thoughtful ]
[ music | Mtv ]

i added a new link to my website today.
Its a site i found looking through the webcam website, that hosts my webcam.
Anyway, its this girls site, ner name : Jamie Leigh.
I thought she was beautiful, so i added her to my links. I liked her site alot.
I know it seems, like a stupid reason, to add someone's website to your links, but i would like to keep up with her site, and see where it goes.
anyway, if you feel the need to check out her site, you can find the link, on my site under "LINKS".

on another note, i wanna see rob zombie's movie this weekend: House of 10,000 corpses.
If anyone sees that movie, and thinks its bad, and ruins it for me before i see it,...they will feel the wrath of raven,..lol

prick me


10 Apr 2003|04:25pm
Naps are good for the soul
[ mood | awake ]

i am cold.
My back hurts.
I'm getting more sleepy by the minute.
I'm bored as fuck, yet i don't feel like doing anything....lazy.
Pepsi is not waking me up.

{EDIT} I just woke up from a nice long nap, i slept soooo well. I even had weird dreams.
allen said we were only gonna sleep 2 hours, i was thinking *yeah right* when i layed down in the bed, and when i got up to pee, i was really thinking * 2 hours my ass, i'm going back to sleep* hahahaha.
{/EDIT}

prick me


10 Apr 2003|12:34am
Hate/DOES/NOT/get/me/off
[ mood | tired ]
[ music | the fan ]

hahha
i'm tired,..i didn't sleep very well last night.
I kept tossing and turning, and for some reason i don't remember even going to bed.
I went surfing the web tonight, looking at different sites, and reading journals.
My eyes feel like they are going to pop out.
I had my webcam on for a while, but i turned it off after about 3 hours, i was tired of letting the world look at me, esp when i'm tired, hot, and bored.
I was bored as fuck,...and i just seemed to have lost touch with reality for a few mintues,...enough to make me get off aol anyway.
I can't figuer out why our room is so damn hot, and the rest of the house is cool.
hahah i think allen is bored as well.
he took me to walmart today, it was nice getting out, cause it was a nice day.
oh yeah and he made me a ring yesterday <333333
so now i have 2 that he gave me. I <3333 him =)
I LOVE ALLEN <333

yeah =) so anyway,...we have to get up all early tomorrow, which sucks my ass. I hate getting up early,...but i figuer i may as well do something useful with my time, and clean our room, and make room for that table he brought me home.
i hope tomorrow is as nice as today was,......

prick me


09 Apr 2003|04:15am
Cross post from Livejournal * New Site is up!!*
[ mood | accomplished ]
[ music | JayZ - Bonnie and Clyde ( Me and my Girlfriend) ]

yes can you believe it!
I spent all day yesterday, and tonight, and i got my whole layout done, and everything in 2 days!! i'm so excited, cause usually it takes me a LONG time due to being lazy,..lol.
If anyone wants to be linked, that i didn't link,...please let me know, and i'll add you ASAP.
anyway,..go look!!! http://www11.brinkster.com/bluestarjaded/
so yeah that whats i've been doing, i just kinda withdrew from everyone so i could get this done.
anyway, i'll make a REAL update tomorrow, as my eyes hurt, and so does my brain.

prick me


06 Apr 2003|08:31pm
Last Night, She said......
[ mood | PMS! ]
[ music | Allens Computer. ]

Last night on web cam, was intresting.
I got over 6000 live hits, by the time i turned it off, at 5 this morning, and 20 connections.
Note: this part of the entry was taken from my live journal
I hate when guys come into my chat, and all they wanna see is me naked,...and all they talk about is, wanting to see my boobs, or me lick my finger.
One guy just kept on with me,...
now let me say,...i will show my boobs, ...but only when i'm in the mood to do it, and its not because i'm doing it for others to see, i'm doing it cause I Want Too.
I esp won't do it, after so many assholes keep pressing the issuse.
I have to say it was only one guy though, and i layed down the law, with him.
I told him, that if he wanted to tell me what to do, and have me do it, he would have to pay me,..cause my cam wasn't a pay site for porn.
then he snapped back saying,..well then why is your cam rated "adult" ?,..and like i said before, because i do sexual stuff but only on impulse.
I was like backoff, i'm not getting paid to show you my titts,...so go jack off somewhere else.
I don't think he liked that too much so he left.
lol
i pissed me off , but yet i was drinking and i found it amusing!

Check out my Livejournal for more details about that.

Today is the 1st sunday me and allen have been home all day in a while.
it was nice to sleep til we were ready to wake up on our own, and not have to force ourselves out of bed.
So tonight, i get to sit back and watch all my shows i Love to watch on sundays, like E-Love , The Anna Nicole Show <-- yes i do watch it,...i find it amusing,..lol, and The Sunday Night Sex Show cause its only live on sundays.
Most of the time, when we are gone, i'm just to distracted to watch any of them, and i forget they are on. lol
I also have to do laundry tonight.

The last week or so, i have been working on a friend's site, which i don't like far from being done with, ( which i should say is coming along nicely, and i'me very pleased with it ), and as soon as i'm done with that one, my site is gettting a make over!
I can't wait to make a new layout for it! i'm just sick to death of the one i have.
Plus i've learned so much Html wise, since i made my site.
So it definitly needs an improvement.

prick me


01 Apr 2003|03:08am
Random Thoughts - My mind is scattered.
[ mood | thoughtful ]

yes i know it has been a few weeks.
I've been so busy lately, and i'm not home that much, but as of now, i'm guessing we will be here til the end of the month. I never thought i would miss my springy bed so much,..lol.
I wanna give many thanks, to GirlWithAGun for my current journal layout! She did an excellant job! I really love it. I would have done it myself, but shes more "pro" at it, and plus Blurty and livejournal html pisses me off, and makes me wanna throw my computer through a window.
Right now i'm working on a site layout for a friend of mine, and i was so excited, cause she gave me full control of it! To bad i have to get drunk to come up with ideas,...lol
I'm hoping to be done with that, by the end of the week, maybe sooner.
I wanna update my site, and with a new layout as well.
The one i have up now has been up since, Feb. it kept me busy while my mouth was killing me, and i was waiting to get my wisdom tooth taken out.
I love it, and i worked hard on it, but i'm getting bored with it, like i always do.
I maybe be easily amused, but i get bored, just as quickly as i was amused.
The weather, hasn't been to bad. Today was real nice, and tomorrow, is gonna be even better!
I can't wait til i can open all the windows in the house, and turn on the fan. Spring is begining to be my favorite time of year. I love wearing my flip flops, and being able to walk around in jeans, and a thin long sleeve shirt and be comfortable.
Fall used to be my favorite time of the year, but i feel myself changing, and fall here, is different than fall in TeNN. Atleast there i could wear my flip flops all year long =/
I can't belive its April already, and its already time to turn the clocks back again. This year has went by so fast, it almost seems like a blur.
I have been living with allen exactly a year.
We got together, Feb.14th, and i moved up here march 4th.
I <3 him sooooo much, i could just squeeze him to death, and cover him in kisses!

prick me


14 Mar 2003|11:05pm
Tonight
[ mood | loved ]

Tonight i got bored, so allen suggested we go for a drive.
We went all over town, i would say we were gone about an hour.
It was sooo nice getting out of the house, esp since it was soooo warm today.
(50 degrees) which is very warm for here, this time of year.
What amazes me is, the people here in MN, think 50 is warm, and i must admitt , after living here a year, and the weather we've been having 50 is VERY warm.
TeNN. where i'm from 50 is still very chilly weather.
Although i will say, this time of year down there, is already warm, and most people are already running air conditioners there.
I know when i went there this time last year, i was there for 2 weeks, and i had the air on the whole time.
It was like 86 degrees, and felt like 90,...very muggy out.
When allen came to pick me up, it was all hot , and you would sweat. When we got up to MN 14 hours later, it was freezing and snowing. lol
so yeah,..
anyway that was pointless, but i felt like talking about it. it just amazes and amuses me. lol

I <3 Allen <3 <3

1 thorn - prick me


14 Mar 2003|03:52pm
WebCam Update.
[ mood | excited ]

well i changed the settings on my webcam.
background and all that fun stuff.
I now have a counter, and a chat room. =)
Me and allen tested it, and it works!
so i'm happy about that! i have my own chat room,..haha
only thing is, the cam will only be on , on the weekends, and i have to start the chat room, to get it going.
i'm sure i'll have it on tomorrow,...so come visit me! =)

prick me


14 Mar 2003|12:35am
Non-working links piss me off.
[ mood | annoyed ]
[ music | allen's computer ]

well i got my webcam up. its not 24 hours, but it will be on alot on the weekends.
I can't have a 24 hour cam, cause well, to much goes on in my bedroom,..ha.
I was checking out my site tonight, and i found a few links that wasn't working, and one site that i Looove, wasn't working either ( suicidegirls.com ) i'm gonna leave it up though, i kinda think, they may just be re-doing the site, and its down for a few.
If that sites gone, i'm gonna be mad as hell. Its a really cool site, and i really liked it, not to mention , i wanted to be on it. ( only cause i wanted a journal there ) lol.
I'm adding a few more cams to my site, they are both 24 hour cams though.
its 2 girls, i'm friends with from livejournal.
One i'll be adding tonight, and the other will have to wait, til i talk to her about it 1st.
this site, is gonna need a new layout soon.

1 thorn - prick me


12 Mar 2003|11:05pm
[ mood | horny ]

a friend of mine is working on a new "style" for this journal,....hopefully it will be on soon.
I can't wait,...i love the way it looks!! she did a really great job!
and yes, i had someone make it from my idea, because html for a website, is way different, and its confusing, and it pisses me off,..lol
I have a very bad headache,...my neck is killing me,...
I would sooo love to have my neck rubbed right now,.....
I need Allen's hands! MMmMMm
i got other things in store for his hands as well,...hahhaa.

prick me


11 Mar 2003|11:09pm
home
[ mood | exhausted ]

Eating twix,...one of lifes simple little pleasures. ha, Mmmm chocolate
so i got home today, i was on the road alot today,...my ass actually got sore on me.
Actually i'm sore all over, my neck hurts, and i had a migrane eariler, but its gone now. thanks to migrane pills .
I still need to take a shower, i've already done our laundry, and tomorrow, i'm hoping to clean our room.
i'm tired though,...maybe tonight allen can actually get some sleep, and we can sleep in a little tomorrow.
Oh yeah, i went on webcam, saturday night, drunk as hell, and showing my boobs,...
it was fun, but weird having people watch me. I stayed on til i got so drunk, i couldn't anymore. lol
tonight, i was on for a little while, but it killed my computer,...so i guess allen is gonna have a fun job this week, lol.
So no more webcam til computer is fixed.
I'm planning on putting it on my site,...but i don't know if i'm ready for that yet or not,...i kinda like being able to choose who sees me right now.
blah, anyway,...
i'm off to take a shower,...
i'll update again later.

8 thorns - prick me


08 Mar 2003|02:53pm
Website
[ mood | happy ]

So i finally got my website, up. Seems like it took me forever, but i'm weird like that.
I didn't want it to turn out stupid, like my last one.
I still have a few links to add to it, but i'll do that later, and yeah i didn't add a guestbook, seeing as how over 200 people visited my other site, and only 4 signed my guestbook! lol
assholes,...lmao.

prick me


24 Feb 2003|08:09pm
About This Journal
[ mood | excited ]

Okay so i made this journal apart of my website.
Which i think was an awesome idea, it lets people, who don't know me, get to know me.
There will now be public entries, but the more private ones, will be locked up, and you'll have to add me to your friends list, in order to view them.
In saying that, i won't just add anybody,....if you add me, i'll have to check out your user info, and if you've only posted a few times, ( like 1-3) or i'm the only friend you have and i don't know you, your wasting your time. I realize, that people, who have no idea about me, or who i am will want to be nosey and read the good stuff.

2 thorns - prick me
Every Rose has its Thorn
We both lie silently still
in the dead of the night
Although we both lie close together
We feel miles apart inside

Was it something I said or something I did
Did the words not come out right
Though I tried not to hurt you
Though I tried
But I guess that's why they say

Every rose has its thorn
Just like every night has its dawn
Just like every cowboy sings his sad, sad song
Every rose has its thorn
Yeah it does

I listen to our favorite song
playing on the radio
Hear the DJ say loves a game
of easy come and easy go
But I wonder does he know Has he ever felt like this
And I know that you'd be here somehow
If I could have let you know somehow
I guess

Every rose has its thorn
Just like every night has its dawn
Just like every cowboy sings his sad, sad song
Every rose has its thorn
Yeah it does

Though it's been a while now
I can still feel so much pain
Like a knife that cuts you the wound heals
but the scar, that scar remains

I know I could have saved a love that night
If I'd known what to say
Instead of makin' love
We both made our separate ways
But now I hear you found somebody new
and that I never meant that much to you
To hear that tears me up inside
And to see you cuts me like a knife
I guess

Every rose has its thorn
Just like every night has its dawn
Just like every cowboy sings his sad, sad song
Every rose has its thorn
Yeah it does