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Thursday, December 4th, 2003
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1:54 pm - way to go becker!
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I watched the TV show Becker last night. It was a great show. Becker is a doctor in a small run down New York Suburb. The show was about all the strange patients that kept showing up at his office and around the café they all hang out at. The patients and wanders definitely had some physiological issues. It turned out that a shelter for people with mental problem nearby had closed down, and all these people were turned out on the streets with no place to go. Becker went to the city officials to complain and try to help these people and he was told that because of the recent tax cuts there was just no money to keep the shelter open and therefore they had no choice but to close it.
Thumbs up to the writers of Becker for bringing to light a very serious issue. I have heard much about how the economy is getting so much better. If it is getting better, at who’s expense. Long term, cutting programs that benefit the most needy in our society is going to hurt us and it is definitely leaving the most desperate with no place to go and no one to turn to.
I am so happy to see that this knowledge is finally filtering into the living rooms of Americans that need to wake up to these issues.
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| Sunday, November 30th, 2003
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11:24 pm - Thanksgiving
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Had an absolutely wonderful thanksgiving weekend. I learned that Leith has the capability of doing several things simultaneously.
He spent a lot of time programming (binary- 10101010101010) that alone would make me go crazy, but at the same time he could watch a movie with us, play a game of chess with his dad or with Keith, help Keith with his science project, and join in our conversations. He has the patience and drive of a great leader, and one day will make a great dad.
Keith had a wonderful time with his brother here, they played nintendo, chess, studied and played ball at the park. He is already looking forward to Christmas, at which time, Leith will help him build his own computer. We only were missing May-Ling.
Warith my lovely husband I think had a wonderful time as well. It is just so healing to be around the love of our family. XXOO to you sweetie.
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| Saturday, November 15th, 2003
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1:57 pm - do not look for answers to why
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One of the forums I visit had posted the following, it is long but beautiful.
Today?s message is in answer to a reader?s question. The question is:
In my country we are living very hard times here; the president is a dictator hidden with a mask of democracy. He is destroying this peaceful and beautiful nation. Today the National Guard made bad actions against innocent and defenseless people, including children and old people. And it is not the end. It is just another thing against human rights.
Sometimes I think we are far from God; I would like to know what would we do during this hard and dark time. How can we be trusted in ourselves, in our spirit guides, in God, when we see and live those horrible things? When hope seems so far from our hearts?
Quado, do you have an answer to this question?
Ah, yes, of course, of course.
When you are in the middle of a storm, it is very difficult to reconcile the outward forces with the inward spiritual drives. It is difficult to understand, and the question of "Why, why?" keeps coming into your mind.
And so first, quiet that question. Do not look for an answer to Why. Look only for the answers to How and What, and find these inside your own heart and inside the present moment.
The biggest enemy you have is your own fear and doubt. And so first, you must deal with these. When you feel overwhelmed and helpless, you must go deep into the present moment, into now, not into your projected future of horrors, not in the past of what has just happened and whatever horrors it may contain, but down into now, right now, this moment.
And here, you must dig deep enough into this moment to banish fear. You will not find fear within this moment. Fear lives in the past and in the future. Fear cannot survive the light of now.
For yes, within this moment right now there is light. There is light and peace, all within this moment. So come here as often as you can. Develop rituals and meditations which will allow you to bring yourself quickly and peacefully here, by just breathing down a few times and picturing a scene which you use in your morning meditations and which you associate with peace.
And then, within this current moment, you can ask yourself, how can I deal with this situation? What can I do in this moment, this moment right now, which will head me in the right direction, which will help make this situation better? And then, overcome any residual fear you have, overcome any doubts about your own abilities, and act. Act out of what you find in this moment.
What you will find is that there is some small thing you can do. If you allow yourself to become overwhelmed by the enormity of what lies ahead, by focusing on the future, then you cannot act. But if you will simply look into now and ask, "What can I do now?" you will be able to move forward.
If you were to set yourself the task of planting flowers all over an entire hillside, acres and acres of flowers, you would feel daunted by the task. You could look at all the work which needed to be done. You could count the number of flowers which would be needed. You could calculate how long it would take you and determine that it was impossible.
But if instead, you came down into the current moment, this moment right now, you could simply reach over and plant a flower. You could call a few people on the phone and ask them to come over and plant a flower. You could call to the birds and give them seeds to scatter, and watch as they glided around. You could offer up a prayer for the winds to pick up the seed and spread it across the hillside and the showers to then come and water the seeds. You could do any number of things if you would allow yourself to act now, in this moment.
And even if what you did was just plant one little flower and then care for it well, and then in the next moment, plant one more. And if all you accomplished was to plant one little part of the hillside and get it blooming with beauty, it might bring joy into a few hearts and be quite enough.
Do not allow yourself to get blocked by fear and doubt. Do not stop because you think it is impossible. Do not despair because you cannot prevent the bad things which are happening.
If you find yourself in a situation where you can actually do something, where you can step forward and protect someone, where you can act and make a difference, wonderful, then do so. As for this moment, if that is not the case, all you can do is either step one step closer to where you will be positioned to help, or do something else useful. All you can do is what you can do, and it is enough.
What lies before you in this moment is enough, if you do it with love instead of despair, with acceptance of what this moment holds, a deep acceptance that life is as it is, that this moment is as it is.
Accept now. Accept life as it is. Accept people as they are. Right now. And then, within this deep acceptance and reverence for life, and understanding that there is a bigger scheme to which you are not privy, then do what you can do.
Lift fear and doubt from your heart. Fill your heart with love, loving life, loving each breath you take. Share that love with others. Give the gift of love, not fear, to all you encounter. Encourage people to do the little they are able to do and not to focus on the darkness and the fear. Focus on the light which can be shed.
The more people who are glowing with light, the greater the area that is lit and in which fear and darkness cannot reside.
Begin glowing yourself. Begin by lighting your life and eliminating fear. Then act. Act out of that love, out of that understanding and compassion. Act out of what is before you right now.
Walk in love. Go with love. You are surrounded by love and caring and it will be with you when you need it.
http://www.quado.com/daily_portion.htm
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| Saturday, November 8th, 2003
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9:31 am - love in action
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love in action
http://www.civicworldwide.org/
The above link is to non-profit organization founded by a 26 year old women who literally goes from door to door interviewing victims of war. Their goal is to get an accurate accounting of the human costs of such conflict. Their findings are used to lobby governments for aid that will help these victims rebuild their lives and communities.
The way this woman faces each day amidst so much pain and suffering without letting it break her spirit is truly an act of the most divine unconditional love.
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| Friday, November 7th, 2003
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7:47 pm - the power of determination
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Keith got straight A's is school this six weeks. Thanks to his determination to do so and a wonderful and supporting brother that pushed him to try just a little bit harder. Way to go Keith!!!!
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7:46 pm - no time like the present
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| Thursday, November 6th, 2003
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7:29 pm - what really matters
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Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter. - Martin Luther King, Jr.
Someone sent me this quote today, and it really moved me.
Since my last panic attack, I have not been able to watch, read or listen to very much news. As soon as I start reading about Iraq, I start feeling angry about what is happening, and then I feel the anxiety tightening like a noose around my neck. I want so to scream out and make the world see that what we did was wrong, and that if we really did care about the welfare of these people, we would be doing more to secure the peace. We would be building alliances with the rest of the world and have them help us. I guess I just haven't been approaching this in the right way. I don't want to remain silent, I can not be the one who will close their eyes when they see something wrong taking place against our fellow mankind. But my anger is like poisonous venom. I need to teach myself to convert this poison into a healing balm of compassion, so that it might send out a more positive energy to help heal the world instead of add to its misery.
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| Monday, November 3rd, 2003
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7:00 pm - open house
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I went to Keith's open house at school last week. It was an exciting event for the children to show off to their parents all that they have learned. The halls were filled with pictures that the children had made. I recall the drawings being very colorful and filled with happy faces. When the open house was over, everyone went into the cafeteria and tables were set up for dessert. I sat at one of the tables munching on a piece of pie, and couldn't help but think about these pictures made by Iraqi Children in June of 2003. It just seems so unfair that these children have to be exposed to so much violence. The kind of violence that I don't even let my child watch on TV. I wish I could share the peace that is enjoyed by my family with these children.
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| Saturday, October 25th, 2003
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5:44 pm - The Serenity Prayer
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God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.
Living one day at a time; Enjoying one moment at a time; Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace; Taking, as He did, this sinful world as it is, not as I would have it; Trusting that He will make all things right if I surrender to His Will; That I may be reasonably happy in this life and supremely happy with Him Forever in the next. Amen.
--Reinhold Niebuhr
Listen to this interview of Elisabeth Sifton who is the daughter of American theologian Reinhold Niebuhr, who wrote the Serenity Prayer. October 23, 2003 on NPR Fresh Air OnLine. http://freshair.npr.org/day_fa.jhtml?display=day&todayDate=10/23/2003
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4:39 pm - Reiki
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I have learned that there are different flavors of Reiki, but all have the same or similar basic principals.
1. Anger not 2. Worry not 3. Be grateful and humble 4. Work hard towards spiritual growth 5. Be kind to all
Reike has no religion, it is the universal life force energy that we use everyday. It is the same energy that gives us life, that processes our thoughts, that tells our minds what we see. You may believe that this energy is of God, or Christ or Allah or you may have no belief at all except that it is just the same energy that created and continues to create life on earth.
When I first started reading about Reiki, it was in a desperate need to find a way to heal myself from horrible panic attacks. I feel this overwhelming sensation that I am about to die. This last time, I actually felt myself losing consciousness. I was left with a choice of either doing something to help myself, or start looking for a really good psychiatrist. I know how to get the medication I need, and I could keep myself drugged up if I so choose. But I don't really want to escape from this really precious gift of life. So somehow I found my way to Reiki.
I got a book from the library, and then started looking it up on the Internet, and found that there is a plethora of support groups using Reiki from all over the world. I went to one of their web sites and requested healing for myself. I wasn't really expecting to get anything other than their support, but someone sent me an e-mail telling me they had sent me distance healing, and they told after receiving my request that I needed to meditate in order for it to work. So I went upstairs by myself and began to meditate, using what I had learned in the book as a guide. I have tried to meditate in the past, and it was really quite boring, I never did see the point in it, and was really taken by surprise at what I experienced. It was like taking a valium, I was totally and completely relaxed, I felt a warm energy surging through my body, it was like I had plugged myself into something. I could feel it flowing from my heart to the tips of my fingers, to my feet, to my head. It was warm, and it tingled. As I passed my hand over my body, I could feel the sensation of energy without even touching. The only way that I can explain it, is kind of like the force you might feel while holding two magnets together.
This experience was a bit frightening at first, because it is so powerful. But I have a feeling that this may be exactly what I need. I was raised Christian, so what makes me I feel more comfortable, is seeing this energy as a blanket of Gods love. It is the faith that Christ spoke of when he said that your faith can move mountains. Your good intentions can make miracles happen. But that is just the way I like to interpret it, as it is clearly explained in learning Reike, this energy has no religion, it belongs to everyone.
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| Thursday, October 23rd, 2003
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8:24 pm - learning to re-focus
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Have been getting too caught up in trying to understand why people can't see the world the way I do. It has been affecting my health and I need to refocus. I started learning Reiki as a way of meditation and self healing. So far I am finding that there really may be something to this meditation and universal life force energy stuff, I am feeling much better. I have given myself a break from the news for a while. I want to contribute to the positive energy this world needs, and my anger seems to have been fueling the fire.
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| Friday, October 10th, 2003
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7:35 pm - going to war without preparing for peace
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Frontline on PBS showed a documentary last night on the run up to war in Iraq, the documentary was titled Truth, War and Consequences. While watching the documentary, I felt my heart stop several times at what I was seeing. One story was about soldiers punishing whom they determined were looters, the so called looters had several long pieces of wood tied to the top of their car. The soldiers took the civilians from the car, shot at the windshield, and then took one of the American tanks and drove over the car demolishing it to a slab of worthless metal. It was later found, that this car was the family’s only income, as they used it for a taxi. It was heartbreaking.
Later in the documentary there was an interview with Robert Perito, a special advisor to the Rule of Law program at the United States Institute of Peace. I went to the PBS site today and read the entire interview. It nauseated me to see that the Bush administration was presented with the strong possibility of violence and looting as part of the aftermath of war, It has been proven throughout history and I many of our previous wars, but this possibility was simply ignored. It was also presented to the administration the immediate need for peace officers after the war versus military officers to work with civilians, and that also was ignored. They didn't even start preparing for the rebuilding of Iraq until 60 days before the war. How irresponsible. I spend more time preparing for an important business transaction. I was so utterly depressed after seeing this documentary; can you imagine preparing the entire rebuilding of a country in 60 days? They spent so much time planning for war, that they did not even take the time to plan for peace.
Even now, they are not taking the time and money it takes to properly train the kind of police force that is needed to secure this country.
There was something about Robert Perito, that just by looking at him you could read in his eyes, a deep and the heartfelt disappointment in the way the Bush administration ignored what history has proved time and time again, that you can not go to war without preparing for the peace.
Read the entire interview with Robert Perito here…http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/pages/frontline/shows/truth/interviews/perito.html
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| Wednesday, October 8th, 2003
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1:17 pm - political science
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I was listening to NPR on my way to work and they were interviewing songwriter Randy Newman. The clips that they played were quite political in nature. I looked up the lyrics to a song that he had written 30 years ago. This is amazing, you would think that they were just written a year ago. This one is called Political Science.
I don't know why. We may not be perfect But heaven knows we try. But all around even our old friends put us down. Let's drop the big one and see what happens.
We give them money But are they grateful? No they're spiteful And they're hateful. They don't respect us so let's surprise them; We'll drop the big one and pulverize them.
Now Asia's crowded And Europe's too old. Africa's far too hot, And Canada's too cold. And South America stole our name. Let's drop the big one; there'll be no one left to blame us.
Bridge: We'll save Australia; Don't wanna hurt no kangaroo. We'll build an all-American amusement park there; They've got surfing, too.
Well, boom goes London, And boom Paris. More room for you And more room for me. And every city the whole world round Will just be another American town. Oh, how peaceful it'll be; We'll set everybody free; You'll have Japanese kimonos, baby, There'll be Italian shoes for me. They all hate us anyhow, So let's drop the big one now. Let's drop the big one now.
This was from the Album "Sail Away" 1972 Click here for more Randy Newman lyrics. http://www.lyrics.net.ua/song/39659
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| Saturday, October 4th, 2003
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12:33 am - never forget
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I was driving to work the other day and I was stuck in morning traffic sitting behind this SUV with a bumper sticker that said “NEVER FORGET-September 11, 2001”, it was printed on the ever-so popular patriotic background of red, white and blue. “Never Forget!”, such a vehement statement. It hit me like the call of the Alamo, never forget what they did to us, we will prevail. I have seen the phrase over and over again, and it is usually connected with supporting our troops, or supporting Bush, or supporting the war in Iraq. I wonder if the people that so patriotically display and repeat these words, actually realize who the enemy really is, and for that matter who it is not. “Never Forget”, how can anyone who lives and was in this country on that fateful day two years ago ever even try. It is embedded in our minds forever. It was horrific and surreal, many of us for the first time in our lives witnessing our country being so personally and brutally attacked. I concur that we should not forget, but not for reasons of revenge. The first thing we should be asking is WHY. These young men flying planes into our buildings sacrificed their lives and the lives of innocent people for a purpose. These attacks were carefully planed over a long period of time, there is a deep and burning hatred towards our country, and I want to know WHY. What did we do that could cause such malevolence. The only explanation that was ever given to us was that they hate our freedoms. What freedoms do they hate? They lived in this country; they tasted and enjoyed our freedoms. This burning rage that caused them to sacrifice their lives surely runs deeper than just hating our freedoms. If the only reason is just hating our freedoms, then why did they choose us? Why not Canada, or England, or Germany or France? I have seen European television, and Americans seem a lot more conservative then the Europeans. We almost impeached our president purely on the basis of moral integrity. I can not accept that this hateful act was done on the sole basis of hating our freedoms, there has to be more.
Part of my job involves safety, and for every accident, or incident, or close call that occurs in the workplace, there is an incident investigation that seeks out the root cause of the incident. By identifying the source or the root of the problem, they hope to prevent it from ever happening again. I think we as American citizens have a responsibility to seek out the source of the problem before we so readily go out and attack the world. Doesn’t it say something to the people of this country, that WORLD opinion was not behind us in the war with Iraq. Yes we should never forget what happened on September 11, 2001, we can’t let it happen again, but first we need to seek out the root of this immense hatred towards us. We can’t go on endlessly fighting an endless war when we don’t know who or what the enemy is. Its funny how the term terrorists can mean anything they so choose it to be. It started as Al-Quaeda, then it turned into Bin Laden, then it became Saddam and now it is the Iraqi resistance, and who knows who it will be next. America, wake up, and start asking questions. Don’t let your sons and daughters die to the call of “Never Forget” when you don’t even know what you are fighting against and why it all happened in the fist place.
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| Thursday, October 2nd, 2003
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9:59 pm - getting to the real issues.....
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From the blog of a friend.....
Can we please differentiate between the words "Islam" and "Islamic fundamentalism?" Can we separate "Middle East" and "Arab" from "terrorist?" These words do not mean the same thing, but I often hear them used interchangeably in conversation. I would argue that the responsibility of all Americans is not to seek out terrorist suspects and live in fear, but instead to think for ourselves and question everything about this war on terror, from our political leaders to the source of this terrorism. I would like to see citizens that go beyond catch phrases and think about the real issues at hand.
http://www.may-ling.com "my second firing line" 9/26/03
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9:35 pm - the power of the people
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The following is an excerpt from an article I found on the web-site "Foreign Policy in Focus". This is a brilliant article that illustrates how the power of the people can peacefully overcome the "Bush Juggernaut".
Democratization: The Bush administration has systematically opposed resistance to its dictation. But U.S. threats can be used to make the issue of peace an issue of democracy and self-determination. In some cases--as happened in Turkey on the eve of the Iraq war--governments can be made more afraid of their own people than they are of the Americans. If they are not, that in itself provides a strong case for regime change to establish democracy and self-government. Democratic pressures can erode Bush's "coalition of the willing."
Nowhere is this more important than in the Middle East. Here, a string of autocratic regimes oppress their own people and deny their human rights with political support, funding, and military assistance from the U.S.; at the same time they cooperate with U.S. policies despite the overwhelming opposition of their own people. In such a setting, the fight for democracy and human rights can go hand in hand with the fight against U.S. domination. A fight for democratization without U.S. domination would be supported by the vast majority of the population of most Middle Eastern countries--including, most likely, Iraq--while at the same time isolating and providing an alternative to those who wish to replace existing authoritarian regimes with new nationalistic and/or theocratic ones.
http://www.fpif.org/commentary/2003/0305movement.html
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| Tuesday, September 30th, 2003
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10:48 pm - tax dollars at work...nylon t's for Iraqi fire fighters
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From ABC News on Iraq's Fire Department......
The station's dozen or so firefighters were decked out in brand-new "Baghdad Fire Department" T-shirts — written in English, not Arabic — supplied by the U.S. military.
"Today is the first day of a new beginning for our department," said Ali Sadoon, director general of civil defense. "The pay for our firefighters has increased significantly, allowing us the opportunity to retain quality personnel and maintain our dignity."
With U.S. money, the station has also been repainted and supplied with new beds, air conditioners, office equipment, and a television and DVD player. But after doing their best for the cameras, the firefighters told us there were still no replacements for the fire engines and protective gear taken by looters just after the war.
"I'm happy the Americans helped us," said one of them. "But if I'm going to fight fires, I'm going to need better clothing than a T-shirt. It's nylon and will burn right off. We want the same kind of gear we see in American movies."
http://abcnews.go.com/sections/wnt/World/iraq030827_reconstruction.html
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| Wednesday, September 24th, 2003
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9:30 pm - ouch.....the truth comes back to bite
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From the Philadelphia Inquirer
"The President's poll numbers are declining because he didn't level with the public about the aftermath of an Iraq war. The public is startled by his request for $87 billion (in addition to more than $50 billion so far) because it was never forewarned of such numbers.
A year ago, White House budget director Mitch Daniels excoriated Lawrence Lindsay, Bush's economic adviser, for suggesting war with Iraq might eventually cost $100 billion to $200 billion, and Lindsay was soon fired. Daniels said the costs would be between $50 billion and $60 billion."
http://www.philly.com/mld/inquirer/news/special_packages/sunday_review/6819922.htm
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| Tuesday, September 23rd, 2003
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11:31 pm - a country divided
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It is sad to see our country so divided. It seems people are way right or way left. It is sad because after 9/11 we were so united. You could just look at a complete stranger and communicate without words our love and our pain for this country. I don’t like Bush’s politics at all, I think he is down right scary; as a person though I have heard that he is a pretty nice guy, and that’s why it is so hard for people to think bad about him. The truth is just so painful; we want so to believe him, to believe that there really are weapons of mass destruction, to believe that a pre-emptive attack was necessary. As the truth starts leaking out, it really hurts, it taints our image, and we feel defensive. I think it is so important to try and keep an open mind, to sit back and take a strong look at reality, to be able to tell the difference in what is factual and what is only spin; to be able to see what will really help our country as a whole, and what may hurt us as a majority
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| Sunday, September 21st, 2003
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2:47 pm - the truth speaks for itself
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http://www.whitehouse.gov/news/releases/2003/03/20030319-1.html Presidential Letter
Text of a Letter from the President to the Speaker of the House of Representatives and the President Pro Tempore of the Senate March 18, 2003
Dear Mr. Speaker: (Dear Mr. President:)
Consistent with section 3(b) of the Authorization for Use of Military Force Against Iraq Resolution of 2002 (Public Law 107-243), and based on information available to me, including that in the enclosed document, I determine that:
(1) reliance by the United States on further diplomatic and other peaceful means alone will neither (A) adequately protect the national security of the United States against the continuing threat posed by Iraq nor (B) likely lead to enforcement of all relevant United Nations Security Council resolutions regarding Iraq; and
(2) acting pursuant to the Constitution and Public Law 107-243 is consistent with the United States and other countries continuing to take the necessary actions against international terrorists and terrorist organizations, including those nations, organizations, or persons who planned, authorized, committed, or aided the terrorist attacks that occurred on September 11, 2001.
Sincerely,
GEORGE W. BUSH
The truth speaks volumes (2)…………Bush says there is no evidence of a connection between 9/11 and Iraq, Rice said "We have never claimed that Saddam Hussein had either direction or control of 9/11." http://www.cnn.com/2003/US/09/17/sprj.irq.bush.ap/
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