Andria's journal

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Monday, October 2nd, 2006
1:34 am - lost and unfound
I am becoming overwhelmed with school. This semester is not panning out the way I imagined and it is almost half-way over.

I have a French paper due tomorrow and a law test. I am baffled and confident I'll fail.

Cops is on television.

Carrington and I have been fighting like cats and dogs. He makes me upset, I don't know what to do. I know I don't want o be without him, but I can't take it. He is being rude, crude and it playing games.

I feel so alone. Alone in a romantic way, not in life. We have been together for over two years and he just wants to be a jackass all the time. Ugh.

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Sunday, September 17th, 2006
1:25 am - wow..
I keep making journals, and never keep up with them. I honestly hope to change that.

Updates with me? Carrington and I are still together. He pisses me off more than occasionally, but we have been great for the last week.

I am swamped with school. Between exams and papers, I don't know what to do.

I finally joined a club at school (Legal Professions Association) and I am SGA Alternate. It is not much, but it is something to put on my resume. I have started to work out atleast two days a week for two hours.

My mother was sick for quite some time, but now she is out of the hospital and progressing beautifully.

I want to do alot of things. Mainly, I want to just throw myself out there and get my hands dirty and do it. I have exposed myself to two movies I normally wouldn't see (Hollywood Land and The Black Dahlia. Both exceptional in more ways than one. But, Hollywood Land was better. I am an Adrien Brody fan.

Life is okay in general. I am content knowing how things have turned out after the last month.

P.S. My hair smells.

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Wednesday, June 22nd, 2005
11:45 pm - i had forgotten
I'm so in love with Carrington. More than I ever had anticipated, but it's what I did dream of.

He somehow lands on my last nerve at times, but it never last long. He is absolutely my heart.

I want us to work things out completely and I want him to be the one I wake up to everyday. I want to have a fall wedding with him and I want to raise a family with him.

I want to be honest and better myself for him and I would like for him to think of me in that same light.

He's it and I simply don't want to be without him.

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Thursday, May 19th, 2005
10:33 am - o-face
I contacted Bryce. He is still with his girlfriend and I told him that I was dating. He wants to hang out, but for a few reasons, I don't want to. One, I'd rather be with Carrington. Two, I'm fat. Three, I'm busy and he leaves friday.

I love Carrington so much. I really do. Almost a year of arguments, frustrations, misunderstandings, silence, and other menial things..and I couldn't love him more. Well, I could and I know that's coming.

I always had said that the guy who gave me my first orgasm would be the one I married, and it was him. So, I guess he's "it".

For the last week, the sex between us has been the best it's ever been. I'm losing inhibtions a bit because I'm so confident that he loves me, no matter how I look under clothes. So, I want to try more things, like being on top or giving him oral sex.

Sunday night, we were in his bedroom. We were going at it hard, so the bed was making noise. We decided to get on the floor in the bonus room that was over the garage. We were going at it again and he said that he was about to come, and I told him no. He stayed while I kept going, and then out of no where..I orgasmed. It was the most ridiculously feel-good feeling that I have ever encountered.

After we were finished, I had the worst toothache of my life. But, worth it.

current music: even when i'm sleeping - Leonardo's Bride

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Wednesday, May 18th, 2005
4:42 am - bryce c.
It's 4:42am and I am still up. I have to wake up at 7:30a to be on time for work by 9a.

Today (yesterday) was surprising. I went into work and Frank (a co-worker) told me that a person inquired about me earlier. I asked if it was a guy or a girl and he said that he believed it was a gentleman. He wrote his name down as Bryce.

My eyes shot open wide. I was excited.

Bryce was a guy that came into the dealership, driving an RSX, one Saturday while I was working. It was only weeks before Christmas and he was in town visiting his father.

He was very attractive, tan, nineteen, seemed honest and wasn't from the area. We began making small chat about Greensboro and the area that he is from (New Bern) and slipped in that he had a girlfriend. I was disappointed, but still intrigued because this was when Carrington and I were problems and going through our "off" period opposed to "on.

When it was time to leave, he sat into his car, shut the door and looked at me through the glass. I didn't mean to stare back, but I did. I hoped that it would be like a scene from a movie and he'd come back in and talk to me again..and he did just that. He climbed out of his car, came back in and told me that he was going to buy Christmas presents for his girlfriend and wanted to know where a shopping center was, and what I should buy her.

I mentioned in a coy way that I wasn't like other girls, so that was a tough question. He said that I seemed very fun to be around and that he wouldn't mind hanging out with me since he was so new to Greensboro. I gave him my number and he left. I was very excited and in a weird way, I felt like he could have been perfect boyfriend material. I never saw or heard from him, until today.

Frank said he had asked if I still worked there and when I would be coming in. He said he waited four hours until he left. He took his number just in case. I thank Frank for that.

I plan on calling after work tomorrow, just to catch up. Very exciting.

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4:35 am - no introduction needed
Wow. I forgot that I even had this.

My name is Andria. I'm three months shy of twenty-one and I have no idea what I'm doing.

I'll keep adding as I go.

current music: silence

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Tuesday, February 18th, 2003
8:54 pm - yeah
Hello, world.

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