| Hi, my names laura. and im bipolor. |
[28 Jul 2003|02:50pm] |
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im new. my names laura.
i seem just to hate my life. no matter how good it seems
im 109 pounds and im about 5 foot, .. i feel fat all the time. and whenever somebody seems me in my batinsuit or even in regular clothes, and just glance at my stumach. i just seem to want to cry. and i dont know what to do.
Everyone tells me my boyfriends crazy about me. i just dont feel it. he never calls me pretty or anything. he use to when we started to go out, but now , its just a different story. The most he ever said to me was "you look good today". and its starting to piss me off. I'm a bitch to him all the time, because i get mad at him for the simplest things.
I know im diognoised with bipolor, but it just sucks how ihave to take 5 pills just to get threw one day.
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| keep them blinded |
[28 Jul 2003|02:59pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 contemplative |
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music |
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Every Sunday |
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So I'm new around here . . . new to the community too, of course. I stumbled onto this and decided, Yep I've felt this way, so I joined up. I mean, it's not like I've been rejected... it's that I FEEL out of place most of the time, so that in itself causes a problem, internally any way. It's like, or it IS irony; the people that do seem to fit in and all that good stuff, feel the same as most of you. So it's not what it seems, this illusion we build around ourselves...and how we then try not to label ourselves and such . . . when in reality, we always do end up as a label, no matter what you decide to be/do with yourself. But I'm just as confused as the next person who's not afraid to admit it, so I might not make much sense. But as always, there's always a ring of truth around something (like jokes for instance, which is why joking to me is just another form of implications/indirect negativity. Jokes on people, that is -- which by the way, is something I avoid doing and it's hard to teach this to people; they mostly don't want to understand.) So . . . take that ring and explore it, then expand. Yeah...I tend to go on tangents, so don't mind me.
... yeah.
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