|where the sun never dies....
||[04 May 2004|10:17am]
i feel so worthless
i feel like i do absolutely nothing
i feel like a huge failure
i hate not having a job, well a stable job. i hate the fact that i went to college for 4 years, suffered through all of that for a BA in fine arts photography and i have nothing.
i hate the fact that josh gets up and goes to work, and i just lay in bed dreading to start my day of nothing.
i hate the fact that i can't really apply for any jobs right now, because we're going to be so busy this summer with youth activities that no one will hire me because i will be asking off for so many weeks.
ugh......i hate feeling this way. i hate feeling that there is no purpose for my life each day. i hate wondering to myself, will i ever become anything? or will i just remain the loser that i am.
i need that confidence that you have found, that you speak so highly of.
where oh where are you self confidence?
your not so best friend,