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well he sounded fat.

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[03 Dec 2003|07:18pm]
[ mood | cold ]
[ music | weezer-suzanne ]

If I were a [feminine] gay man... by 38886
Your name
Your Gay Man NameJerry
Your Gay Man OccupationPoledancer at Local Gay Club
Your Stereotypical Gay Man TraitFlailing when excited
Your Gay Man Music of ChoiceBackstreet Boys
Your Gay Man Cause of DeathMobbed on way to Canada
Created with quill18's MemeGen!

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[29 Nov 2003|11:33am]
[ mood | indescribable ]
[ music | pixies-broken face ]

yesterday was one of the wierdest longest days of my life. yea.....so i went to my aunts for thanksgiving. it was just me my aunt and my cousin so we went to go see a movie. brother bear. i dont like new disney movies. they dont even reach the level of the old stuff. i mean gthe little mermaid and snow white. theyre classics! But the new stuff is all mediocore. they all have the same story line. bleh.

i look outside and everything seems so empty. all teh leaves are gone but there is still no snow to come and cover teh ground. i really dont liek it when its liek this. it wierds me out. like eminent armegeddan.....



hmmm.... I GOT A BROKEN FACE! UH HUH! UH HUH!

2 bottles of beer on the wall | get smashed? 

[16 Nov 2003|01:26pm]
[ mood | numb ]

i only seem to write in here when im sad. but i guess thats ok. teh masses enjoy hearing about the tragedy of others. happiness is not as entertaining. well yea. i have nothing more to write really. i cant wait until thanksgivving. its going to be such an exciting yet painful weekend.

3 bottles of beer on the wall | get smashed? 

[08 Nov 2003|01:54pm]
[ mood | discontent ]
[ music | fetus ]

im updating because i just talked to marissa on the phone and she told me to. i really dont have alot to say. ok. thats a lie. but i have no desire to talk about the things that have occured in the past couple weeks. first marking period is over. my grades arent bad at all. got a job at kinderstaff. i love it. fucked a boy. hated it. ive been talking to alot of random people. i love doing things like that. just talking to people ive never met before. there just some sort of anoninimity and lack of judgement that allows you to be a better person than you normally are. did triple c last night for the first time. thats some crazy shit. wanna try it again. im gonna look back on this entry later and think of what an idiot i am. i wanna drop out of school and work in salvie. i really need to stop having casual sex. i can feel it starting to affect me. my life is changing so much. i doubt it will be like it was before. all of my innocence is gone. maybe it was overrated, or maybe im just scared to admit that i miss it and i want it back. my life is pointless.

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[26 Oct 2003|08:03pm]
[ mood | cynical ]
[ music | veruca salt ]

i found out that some girls can be as bad relationship wise as alot of the guys ive experienced. how sad. i really did have faith in them before

1 bottle of beer on the wall | get smashed? 

[09 Oct 2003|02:08pm]
[ mood | codiene happiness ]

god damn piercings and god damn doctors. they dont do shit. i think anyone with a white coat and a prescription pad could be a doctor. i mean its not like they did anything i couldnt have done myself. well i have to say these pain killers are nice, but other than that i just seem to be getting worse. i really do hope my hearing comes back. its quite scary to think that i might only be able to hear out of one ear for the rest of my life. arrrg.


day time talk shows arent as interesting as i remember. i lose interest after about 10 minutes or so....o well.


ian came over on tuesday and we had fun. first good sex in a while. ahhhh. finally got jack out of my head. god he was bad. yea...so later tuesday night my mom went into my room and found the dirty condom on the floor. ooops. i must have forgot it. so yea. she was really really mad. she flipped out and started saying the meanest things to me. she really has anger issues. i mean at least i was using a condom. christ.


hopefully ill be going back to school tomorrow because if not i cant go out tomorrow night, that and i hate to say it but im getting bored. im gonna have sooooo much makeup work to do this weekend. o well...

9 bottles of beer on the wall | get smashed? 

gimme a reason to care. ill sing along forever. [05 Oct 2003|05:54pm]
[ mood | cold ]
[ music | bouncing souls-better days ]

yea. so my weekend was shit. it basically consisted of drinking and malling. well actuallt the mall wasnt that bad. but drinking doesnt even make me happy any more. whats a girl to do?


so yea i went out to lunch with my dad today. it was awkward and horrible. he says hes blind. i dont know what to say because i can never be sure if hes lying or not. hes such a douche.


tomorrow is yom kippur and we have off from school! yay!!! im glad to get a break from all this monotomous shit. i ran out of cigs:(....rachie better come to the rescue or im gonna go nuts.



i wish i had something more real to say but its hard to try and put all the crap ive been through lately into words. the only way i could really describe it is i hate boys, but that sounds wrong. o well......goodnight everyone.

get smashed? 

[30 Sep 2003|02:54pm]
[ mood | disappointed ]
[ music | doggy whining ]




Which Donnie Darko character are you? by Shay

2 bottles of beer on the wall | get smashed? 

[29 Sep 2003|07:05pm]
[ mood | nauseated ]
[ music | my head hurts too much to listen to music ]

CWINDOWSDesktopFightclub.jpg
Fight Club!


What movie Do you Belong in?(many different outcomes!)
brought to you by Quizilla












yay! im sooooo cool! i got the coolest movie ever!

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[28 Sep 2003|11:21am]
[ mood | frustrated ]

so this week has been wierd. some hours are really short, and others last for days. im not sure what is making it this way, but its making me uncomfortable.

well yesterday i spent all day with john. it was soooo great. we were at rachels and we just did nothing basically but it was great. marissa was there too. it was so nice to see them kiss and stuff. theyre the cutest couple ever.

got my sexy boots in the mail. yay! wore them to school and i was like 6 feet tall. i felt so cool. also got an ozma cd at the mall for $6. hot topic is so dumb man. that cd is great.

gosh this paranoia is really fucking with my head alot. i keep feeling like people hate me. why am i so damn wierd?

so ive been talking to john for about a week today, and i think im in love with him already. its so strange. i cant describe it at all. hes completly different than every other guy. its refreshing and addicting. god im such an obsessive. im leaving now.

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the wheels on the bus go round and round.... [24 Sep 2003|02:45pm]
[ mood | anxious ]
[ music | mleh. ]

it seems like school gets longer and longer everyday. im not sure why but i dont like it much. i think im just tired of the same damn thing everyday. i need some variety. and school defintely does not provide that. i really should just drop out and get a job....but thats basically impossible. o well. yea so this cough i have is getting bad. i spit up shit all the time. i dont like it at all. im like a phlegm machine. ewww. ok. im bored with writing about useless crap. bye.

3 bottles of beer on the wall | get smashed? 

[21 Sep 2003|12:38pm]
[ mood | horny ]
[ music | my sister droning on about nothing. ]

john. is.hot.

i.want.to.fuck.him.


i.need.sex.

2 bottles of beer on the wall | get smashed? 

fact snacks [19 Sep 2003|02:38pm]
While Sports Illustrated’s snowsuit issue never quite caught on, nothing compares to the failure of their opossum-guts-suit issue.

Though not credited on any album, Tom Bosley was often referred to as “the 8th member of Nirvana.”

In ancient China, cable bills were printed on sheets of soup.

While fire ants sting, the bite of a water ant feels like a French kiss from Glenn Close.

Scientology founder L. Ron Hubbard had eleven testicles, none of which were housed in his scrotum.

Your local Kmart sells glimpses of God, you just have to know who to ask and how to gleek at least six feet.

The sun is so big, it could fit a thousand earths inside, that is if it weren’t already full of Dan Marino’s illegitimate children.

By tomorrow, pineapples will outnumber cocaine-filled golf clubs 7 to pi.

From 1982 through 1985, UCLA offered a Master of Fine Rubik’s Cubing program.

Your large intestine is a ticking time bomb.
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a pocket full of posies. [17 Sep 2003|09:10pm]
[ mood | sick ]
[ music | radiohead-kid a ]

yea so school is pissing me off already. i cant deal with my teachers. theyre dumb or just impatient and cranky. i wanna drop out and get a job. i wanna move to the city and live in a shitty ass apartment. that is my dream right now. god why am i so anti social? i went to a party on saturday and couldnt even stand it for like 30 minutes. i guess i just dont understand how people can be amused by jumping up and down to crappy music.


blah blah blah. i thought id love having a journal, but lately it has become more of a chore than something fun. i guess it really has to do with my inability to verbalize my feelings. o well. i can always draw you pretty pictures and post them. yay!


so yea...i have pink eye. my eye hurts so much and its all red and puffy. i really think school makes me sick, because i was fine all summer minus my ongoing cough and now im all run down and shitty. what a load of shit.



rachie is back in school. how great. i gave a her a agreat big hug as soon as i saw her. shes in my lunch too which is nice. she looked like a farmer and it made me giggle. then later today i walked to her house and we talked about random crap like we always do. i wish lee ann dimicelli was my mommy.

cant go to the bouncing souls show on saturday. what a drag. i wanted to see them so bad. i wish philly was closer so that i could go home after, because the only reason i cant go is because of my lack of a place to stay after. mleh.


i want ian to stop being alive. hes too dumb to be worthy of life.






yuck. this room smells like fish....

6 bottles of beer on the wall | get smashed? 

[09 Sep 2003|04:46pm]
[ mood | sick ]
[ music | vomit ]

so im late. and not late like for a class or a doctors appointment. im really late. 4 days. its getting me so nervous. why do i always do dumb things like that. ughhhh. and ive felt sick all day. i bet my teachers really enjoyed seeing me sleep on my desk on the 2nd day of school.

so my english devil is the teacher. whoa switch that dont wanna backspace. yea she hates me already. well no, i dont think she even knows my name. but thats close enough to hate for me.

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[05 Sep 2003|05:23pm]
Am I a nerd? Go ahead...you can tell me...
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[05 Sep 2003|04:51pm]
[ mood | contemplative ]
[ music | cracking of my knuckles ]

ive had time for a alot of thinking lately. maybe too much. i think im driving myself crazy. everytime something happens i think of how that could be represenative for my situation right now and things to come. its not a good thing to do all day.

ive been seeing my dad around the house alot lately. i mean hes not really here. but everytime i go into my garage or search through things ina closet i find something of his. its like he never left at all. i really dont want anymore reminders of him around, but to be able to do that i would have to start anew. hes not worth that.

so me and ian broke up. actually i dumped him. but i just couldnt stand his how distant he had become in just a few days. he made me feel like a piece of meat. and maybe thats how he wanted to treat me all long, and he just had to gain my trust first. i dont think ive been in so much pain in my whole life. hes the first person ive ever loved, and im not sure ill ever be able to trust another male like that again. i feel like a total sucker. hes ruined the whole love experience for me. i just want to erase him and never think of him again.

school starts monday. i thought id be happy to go back and finally see all the people ive been avoiding all summer. but its gonna be horrible. no cigs from 6:45 to 2:30. im gonna be dying. and i have holz last so thats gonna make me insane.

i finally got my dog back today. she was at my dads house for about a week. i knew from the moment i saw her that he beat the crap out of her the whole time. she lost about ten pounds, and has a lump on her head about the size of a lemon. i hate seeing her like this. it kills me inside, but i have no say in when my dad takes her. and i think that is the worst position of all to be in. knowing whats gonna happen, but not being able to change it. just having to sit back and watch the world around you hurt the people you love.

i just want to lay in my bed and never get up again. but i know even there my dreams will haunt me just as the the world outside of me head haunts while im awake. im stuck.





p.s. - if anyone happens to find the piece of heart that i just reccently lost could you please return it to me.
amy ercolani
973.537.6751

1 bottle of beer on the wall | get smashed? 

[29 Aug 2003|07:46pm]
emily and mr king
Im emska. im extreamly british and well hydrated


which one of my friends are you: part two
brought to you by Quizilla
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[29 Aug 2003|07:43pm]
kate
You are Kate! Congratulations because you are the
best out of the bunch. We are still tight and
Jeff thinks you are still pretty darn neat.
Well, sort of neat.


Which one of Jeff's ex girlfriends are you???
brought to you by Quizilla
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weekly fact snacks [29 Aug 2003|07:27pm]
[ mood | sick ]
[ music | ian talking on the phone. ]

Spinach is actually a marsupial.

Before striking gold with Microsoft, Bill Gates unsuccessfully embarked on a career as a rickshaw expert for the US Coast Guard.

David Duchovny was born with 37 ears.

Things in Portugal are so fucked, it's not even funny.

In addition to making the first American flag, seamstress Betsy Ross is also noteworthy for letting the first freak flag fly.

Hockey great Bobby Orr named each of his 14 daughters after the kind of ancient knife they most resembled.

While no two snowflakes look the same, they all love Badfinger.

There are more hate groups in The United States than Mickey Rourke can ever possibly join.

79% of turtles are Episcopalian.

Some of Benjamin Franklin's lesser-known inventions include the croissandwich, the three-ended dildo and the air-banjo.

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