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separated at birth? [09 Dec 2004|12:44pm]
http://www.bbc.co.uk/comedy/theoffice/characters/profile_david.shtml

http://www.flickr.com/photos/agentcooper/1951574/
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some quotes (of mine) [02 Nov 2003|12:33am]
[Once] I told a guy I thought he was cute, and he got all sardonic on me. But really, I meant that I wanted to fuck his brains out, I was just trying to be subtle.



Anyway people who say shit like "i don't wanna give up my anonymity" or "looks shouldn't matter online" are always ugly.



OK, I mean, I love house music as much as the next faggot, but come on people.



The real reason goth boys are hot has more to do with wearing eyeliner than angst being attractive.



Of course fat and ugly chicks like video games. I mean what else are they going to do with their unlimited free time?



It's just a temporary tattoo.
Kinda like marriage.



I am a woman and therefore think embittered men are fun to laugh at.



If he offers you a towel after shooting his load all over you, then he really likes you.



Long distance relationships are completely worthless, unless you're the kind of socially maladjusted twat who can't deal with even the girls you date more than once a month or so.
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is it wrong? [24 Oct 2003|10:51am]
So I just noticed that I wrote this last night:

Sorry, it's past midnight and I'm one of those psycho writing-type-people who get totally fucking energized by writing. I used to think it was just the caffeine and cigarettes, but no, it's the actual writing that jazzes me up. Pumps my nads, as it were. Gets my motor running. I wouldn't say turns me on, because it's more of an automatic killing instinct where I know that I could just keep going all night, whereas when I get turned on I want shit taken care of like Domino's pizza.

and DUDE, I totally cracked up. Does this make me a sad person?
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BEST ALBUM EVER [15 Oct 2003|09:17pm]
Oh it's opening time
Down on fascination street
So let's cut the conversation
And get out for a bit
Because i feel it all fading and paling
And i'm begging to drag you down with me
To kick the last nail in
Yeah i like you in that like i like you to scream
But if you open your mouth then i cant be responsible for
Quite what goes in or to care what comes out
So just pull on your hair
Just pull on your pout
And let's move to the beat
Like we know that it's over
If you slip going under
Slip over my shoulder
So just pull on your face
Just pull on your feet
And let's hit opening time
Down on fascination street

So pull on your hair
Pull on your pout
Cut the conversation just open your mouth
Pull on your face pull on your feet
And let's hit opening time
Down on fascination street
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got laid. [28 Sep 2003|09:22pm]
Not really in the mood to rant about things as a result. Therefore teh funnay is going to be gone for a little while. Although I'm sure a week of work will kill my happy. Just be patient.
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beauty is pain [24 Sep 2003|12:38pm]
So, I'm having a 19-year-old visit me this weekend. In preparation for having him see me naked, I've been dieting. This is bad because I get cranky when I don't eat, even if my appetite is suppressed by caffeine. (It's a total blood sugar thing, dude.) Also caffeine gets me hyper, so as you can imagine I've been rather unpleasant to hang out with. Not that I've been hanging out much, since alcohol has a lot of calories and all my friends are lushes. Also being broke helps one's diet immensely.

Today I've cut myself some slack, I'm only having two diet sodas in total and will even eat before dinner maybe. I brought an apple after all. Anyway before you ask I don't really think I'm fat, I just haven't been 18 in a looong time.
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you only think i'm kidding... [18 Sep 2003|08:22am]
I had like 3 big coffee-mug sized cups of tea yesterday, which effectively prevented me from eating. I figured that would be the end of it, but it apparently had an effect on my testosterone levels which were already mad high from new round of BC. But anyway I woke up at like 6am with an enormous girl-boner, almost 1cm. To get rid of it I did what any red-blooded American would do: I thought of having sex with a 19-year-old till it went away.
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wow [12 Sep 2003|09:44am]
I took half a valium around 10 or so, watched a movie, then waxed my legs with little to no discomfort at all. Or maybe there was a lot of pain but I didn't care. It was pretty impressive. And then I dreamed about exploring a castle. And then about taking a tram around Southern Argentina, there was snow everywhere, and weird animals. And then this guy Tim shows up looking like Keanu in my dream (but it was still him) and I pretended to beat him up for following me from Seattle. It was all very weird.
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rules for "dating" and "boyfriends" [07 Sep 2003|10:11pm]

  1. You have to live a bus-route away, even if you have a car.
  2. You can't be boring. Hint: your Halo score is not interesting, and neither are stories of people you know who died.
  3. Bad kissers are a huge turnoff. I want to feel lips and tongue, not air. And you aren't trying to swallow me. Christ.
  4. I'm not going to like you if you never spend the night after sex.
  5. Speaking of sex, would it kill you to take charge once in a while? Or every time? I need someone who can take charge in the bedroom.
  6. I know it's asking a lot for a man to not be an emotional cripple, but if you have trouble telling your anger from grief, you might want to look into that.
  7. I don't want to date people who believe in God.
  8. If I can't feel your sternum when I touch your chest, I probably am not going to be turned on enough to have sex with you. It's really nothing personal.
  9. Please don't fall in love with me on the first date. I mean, I'm not THAT cool. Third date is fine.
  10. We must get along. I'm easy-going, but when I first meet someone I can be very shy. It's your job to make me comfortable, either by talking real sweet to me or being personable or, well, feeding me alcohol.
  11. You must NOT be a spaz. I'm a pretty quiet person, so you can be louder than me, but my spaz-smoove has lost its appeal.
  12. I really don't want a guy over 5'10", but 6' is the absolute limit.
  13. You don't have to dress to kill all the time, but we should match sometimes. T-shirts are ok if they show off your chest.

*When I say "date" I mean "hang out with and have sex with perhaps in the hopes of it leading to something more serious." By "more serious" I mean of course a boyfriend. There's a lot more stuff I want for that, though.

Boyfriend Requirements

All of the above, plus:

  1. I refuse to get serious with someone who doesn't put forth a pursuit. I mean, I have a life, so don't assume that if I say "I have plans" that I'm just shunting you out. How can I tell that you like me if you never try to get me out?
  2. If I've slept with you and keep hanging out with you, there's probably very little chance I'll turn you down for sex. So go ahead and attack me as much as you want.
  3. Sense of humor very important. I have a dry cutting sense of humor and it's great fun to spar against someone who can play verbal tennis. Otherwise it's doomed. Everyone thinks they have a sense of humor, even if they don't really. If I don't think you're funny, guess what...
  4. No ethical vegetarians/vegans. I don't give a fuck about animal rights, and animals are tasty.
  5. No blind party line followers. No person/ideology has all the right answers, and I am just going to mercilessly mock you till you start crying or something.
  6. You don't have to have perfect grammar/spelling, but you have to care about it. I don't correct people out of malice, I correct people b/c I'm anal.
  7. I don't give a fuck about sports or video games or cars, and if you're cool with me not wanting to be around you while you're geeking out over these things, that's all fine.
  8. I am also not overly into outdoor activities, but with the right company I can indulge. Once a year.
  9. I want to travel and if you don't, well, have fun staying at home.
  10. I want a literate boyfriend. He doesn't have to like the same novels that I do, but I can't fall for a guy who doesn't read fiction.
  11. While I don't want someone who thinks Star Trek Novelizations are high art, I get really mad at people who sneer at the SF/F genres. I admit stuff is crap and some is good. Hell, I even like some jazz, and I hate jazz in principle.
  12. Music, yes, we don't have to like the same music, but you have to be kind of into it. Keeping abreast of new stuff, not just listening to Led Zeppelin or New Order.
  13. I am obsessed with movies and quote them incessantly. I hate people who only watch Hollywood Blockbusters, but I also hate people who sneer at all of them. And I don't really want to educate you in what all the good movies from 1995-2001 are, even though I do know.
  14. You have to be willing to be exclusive with me. If you aren't, then, well, I can't call you my "boyfriend."
  15. Equal partnership. I don't want to feel like I'm the one doing all "the work."
  16. You have to get me gifts. It doesn't have to be expensive stuff, but just anything to show me you're thinking about me. It could be a cool jacket I pointed out to you, it could be an erotic VM message.
  17. Finally you have to fall in love with me. Not immediately but at some point, and you'll have to say it first.
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EIGHT WEEKS [25 Aug 2003|06:52pm]
[ mood | 'bout time ]
[ music | shake down - at night ]

I finally finally got some sexx0r yesterday. Oooh yes. Nice boy, too. Although not really SUPERSTAR enough for me to really like him a lot.

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snide [22 Aug 2003|11:01am]
So someone on my LJ friends list caught CHLAMYDIA from her boyfriend. But, apparently, he drove 30 miles with a pizza for her and like, all was forgiven. Or at least, she's remarking about how wonderful he is and how in love with him she is.

So, you know, it must be nice to be in love and fucking stupid.
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nasty livejournal gossip [28 Jul 2003|11:13pm]
[ music | Journey - Separate Ways (Worlds Apart) ]

item one: someone in seattle began msg'ing me a week ago or so, added me to his friends list... then suddenly stopped msg'ing me and took me off his friends list. Whatever, psycho.

item two: apparently one of the few (local) LJ people who was fucking creepy enough for me to ban from my journal actually is now dating someone else on my friends list. I mean, talk about creepy. Guys who troll LJ specifically to get girlfriends are so goddamn creepy.

item three: a certain girl and her long-distance boyfriend are too fucking high school for me to be polite about anymore. It actually seems worse than me and OPB (aka Cockmaster General) in the fall. Of course that was local and only a couple of months, but then I'm not a fucking stupid girlchild.

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i can beat josh hartnett dammit [24 Jul 2003|06:08pm]
[ music | Various Artists - Moment Scale - Silent Poets ]

It's been 27 days since I last got naked with someone else. And I don't mean in the hot tub. That technically beats my last streak, although the last streak of NoSex lasted about five weeks. Yes, like Bill Clinton, I distinguish between orgasms with another person and actual fucking. And before anyone yells at me, I'm not really complaining, and also unless you're a single person who knows and meets lots of people of the opposite sex, you have no idea where I'm coming from.

At first I was skittish as hell, worried that unless it was a total no-strings situation, I'd just basically fall in love with whomever I slept with. I slowly moved past that into - lesbianism, apparently. Well, some people at a party mistook me for one, and I didn't find out till later, so I clearly got none. And then I had a few conversations about sex that made me wonder what the point of having mediocre sex was. So, when next the opportunity came, I did not take it. And I didn't really feel bad about that.

So I'm thinking maybe I can keep doing that. Of course it's a lot easier to be celibate when you don't leave the house, so we'll see what this weekend brings. And yes I am laughing at myself in the "oooh, it's so hard not to have sex" way. So just shuddup.

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BAH [16 Jul 2003|02:27am]
what the hell is the point of talking to your online crush and then going to shower - and then he's gone? and then the next in line guy is clearly too far gone with drugs to care that you haven't gotten dressed from your shower yet. good god people. there's a horny chick right here, what's wrong with yall.
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paranoia [15 Jul 2003|02:02pm]
I don't really think of myself as a paranoid person, but I suppose objectively speaking I'm a little paranoid. I never really thought about it before, but I get awfully paranoid that people are talking behind my back, or that they don't like me, or whatever. The fact that it turns out to be true 50% of the time doesn't help, either.

Fortunately I'm the only person that can smoke pot and have it help this condition. It just makes me not care about anything.
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brilliant idea [06 Jul 2003|05:50pm]
Steve and I are not exactly at summer weight here.

So I decided to stop cooking us dinner.

Instead, we'll go to sleep immediately after Friends, then wake up and shower and go out and drink.

We'll save money on food AND liquor, as well as slimming down. Because you don't really want to eat when you're hungover, either.

It's perfect.
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stream of thoughts [26 Jun 2003|02:10pm]
The bruise behind my elbow is noticeable. I'm wearing long-sleeved shirts - in 80 degree weather - to hide it. Blood sample, blood drained, it goes to your head. Blood goes from your head into the vial. Blood goes from your head into your groin. Alcohol constricts blood vessels and you feel warmth in your crotch. More likely than not to make bad decisions, but I still wear condoms. I don't. He does. They do. Them. Men. I've not always been discriminate but I've always been afraid. Pregnancy not disease. Never had either. Any of the above. None of the above. But better safe than sorry. I find out tuesday.
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once again they run [23 Jun 2003|06:56pm]
What's wrong with me that all these guys think they won't fall in love with me? I can understand it if they're just that special brand of emotional retard who doesn't want to date anyone seriously, although that's still annoying, but what about a normal guy who's been there, likes hanging out with you with and without sexx0r, but still doesn't want to "commit"?
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men vs. women [20 Jun 2003|11:06am]
[ music | Aereogramme - A Winter's Gratitude ]

I was telling Steve that if I was ever in a situation where I was alone with a guy for an extended period of time and he didn't try to make a move on me, I'd lose interest so fast it'd make his head spin. And he was feeling a little grumpy and said "What's up with women who get all pissed off when you don't try to fuck them?"

So I tried to explain it to him. How our lives we're taught that men are only after one thing. Of course we have to find out on our own that this thing is actually GOOD. And enough guys are enough after sex that, if you put yourself forward enough, they'll take it the rest of the way. It may be as little as a kiss, it may be as much as talking about how much you love to suck dick and how horny you are. Or the alltime favorite move, the crotch-grab. Anyway, so after all that, when a guy doesn't respond by shoving his tongue down your throat and tearing off your blouse, it's like a personal rejection.

And then he started remembering how things were when he first started dating the girl we fondly refer to as "that fucking cunt." Before all that, though. When she was still nice to him. And having constant sex with him. And he got all maudlin. The girl wasn't perfect for him, but he hasn't met anyone since to compare. Which I can relate to, as I felt the same way about Joel until recently. I tried to reassure him but, oh well. I told him he'd better get it out of his system before seeing Maer this weekend, as he's the one who came up with that lovely nickname.

Steve has been in an odd "fuck-with-y" mood lately, and me, I've been in a "don't mess with me or I'll bash your face in" mood, so I was actually pleased to have him being a little bit mopey. This is the Steve I'm familiar with. the Steve I grew up on. The jovial fuck-with-y guy feels like an act sometimes, even though I know it's not. I mean I'm usually able to describe people in a couple of sentences, but I couldn't do it with him, ever. This is a compliment. I like people who can't be boiled down into essentials.

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another caustic entry [18 Jun 2003|10:48am]
I love it when I go to a "party" and there's little kids and littler dogs running around underfoot. And you can't fucking walk anywhere without checking first, because, you know, they'll fucking scream if you step on them. Plus the parents/owners get miffed. What's worse is you might get blood and crap on your shoes.

So rather than enjoy this row inside, I went outside with all the "guys" barbecuing. One of them made a snide comment about me being outside with all the "eligible bachelors." Rather than say, "Look, dude, none of your friends meet my admittedly low standards of eligibility," I said "I just fucking hate kids."

Although, I did end up saying later in a low voice that none of the guys were rich enough to make up for their inadequate looks and social skills. Sorry man, "microsoft rich" doesn't cut it. Maybe my values are all skewed but if I'm gonna get a sugar daddy, I want him to be able to easily give me a full salary and still live his own life just fine.
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