kristina's Blurty Entries [entries|friends|calendar] kristina [ website | my livejournal ] [ userinfo | blurty userinfo ] [ calendar | blurty calendar ]

[28 Dec 2003|12:10am] [ mood | blah ] [ music | nothing ] wow. i've pretty much abandonned my blurty, haven't i? ah well. i like my lj better. everyone should bookmark it, instead of this blurty from now on. www.livejournal.com/users/distant_sanity this site has gone to shit. i think i'll scrap it all and start over. that'll give me something to do... as if i don't have enough projects to work on as it is... photobucket is my idol. im officially plugging photobucket. photobucket is the greatest internet image hosting site in the world. go give them money. 1 shared their dream| go on and scream at me

[15 Dec 2003|09:56pm] [ mood | emotionally exhausted ] [ music | tegan and sara - welcome home ] i have a new livejournal. this one is open to the public. i don't plan on advertising it anymore after this entry, but there will be a link here in my blurty for future reference. lj username: distant_sanity add me, stalk me, mock me, kiss me, kill me, bite me... what ever you wish. go on and scream at me

[15 Dec 2003|12:08am] [ mood | amazed ] [ music | alice playing kh songs ] ok, so i am talking to alice now.... audio talking... and its craaaazy stuff! im all amazed and stuff... it's neat o! i can talk to people in australia, with no long distance charges! technology today... you never know what they're gonna come up with next. chees n crackers, i sound like im 60. blah i have to go bed cause im supposed to get up in 6 hours to take mark and angela to school... but i don't wanna.... go on and scream at me

[08 Dec 2003|05:53pm] [ mood | frozen ] [ music | nothing ] ok... i deleted this. i had my reasons.... for writing it and then for deleting it. * this entry was not directed at everyone in general... it was just a reflection of how i feel in reference to certain people and certain things... and to whoever is reading this, it's most likely not you, so please don't take offense, im venting* go on and scream at me

[06 Dec 2003|10:42pm] [ music | mom - yelling at me for having my own opinnions. ] i got up at 7, and then went back to bed at 7:15, when i found out that the sat test was canceled. i got back up at 12 and went to the xmas party at the nursing home, then got back home at 3:30. i went back to bed at 4 and didn't get up until 6. i went out to dinner with people (mom dad angela mark donna tommy erica deanna tommy and stacey... that's another story though) then got home around 10. it is now 10:30, and im going back to bed. i've only been awake for 8 hours total today. i don't want to be awake. pain only hurts if you let yourself feel it. i want to be numb. go on and scream at me

[05 Dec 2003|05:58pm] [ mood | cold ] [ music | mark watching bowling on tv... wtf? ] this morning was the greatest morning ever. yeah 2 hours delays. i was lame and got to school all early, intending to study for the sats tomorrow, but decided that walking 5 blocks in the snowy-coldness was a much better use of my time... and indeed it was.it was anna's ingenious plan to go get coffee, accomanied by sana, danielle, sarah, and myself. so we proceeded to walk to the brew ha ha in trolley square in our school uniforms. we all got all cold and snowy and wet and it was really fun! yay for unruly behavior! sarah took pictures with her nifty camera, cause she's super nifty like that, and i hope she uploads them to her blurty. yay for our adventure! ooh ooh,and i didn't even slip or fall on my ass or anything! go me! 2 shared their dreams| go on and scream at me

[03 Dec 2003|10:25pm] [ mood | tired ] [ music | tegan and sara - frozen (in my head) ] well hell, i haven't updated here in aaaages. not much to report, i guess. thigs have been generally crappy, and i'm being kept busy. there are only 11 more school days until christmas break. thats exciting. thats about all i have to look forward to. placebo is playing in philly saturday the 13th. i want to go, but i don't want to feel like im forcing missy and matt, so i thikn i might make plans to go with sana and danielle... but i don't want missy and matt to feel like they're being left out or anything, cause i know missy would really like to go. oh well, i'll worry about that once it gets closer to the date of the show. on another note, i fixed my livejournal, and i intend to use it a lot more than i have been. i'm not abandoning blurty, but i like my lj, i know its secure. more secure than this or even my actual journal, cause i have no personal privacy. as of right now... its still public, if you can find it... although i don't reccomend you stalking me, cause that's kinda weird... i don't want ot have to end up making it 'friends only' cause that kinda defeats the purpose, but i like the anonymity of it. so, im still keeping it private. i added more web cam pictures under the 'pictures' section. blah. i had to take them to use for a project for art. blah. opps, i already said that. they make me feel ugly. go on and scream at me

[22 Nov 2003|11:34pm] [ mood | tired ] [ music | tomb raider 2 ] hmm. was just playing around with photoshop for a few minutes while eating diner and watching the santa clause 2. ( click to see ) anyway, so yeah, my pictures didn't turn out very well... poo. i added a review of the show under the other music section. you can read it there if you want. go on and scream at me

[19 Nov 2003|11:22pm] [ mood | tired ] [ music | nothing atm ] sorry... too tired for review. pics didn't turn out very well. am saddened. go on and scream at me

[18 Nov 2003|10:50pm] [ mood | happy ] [ music | lacuna coil - unspoken ] lacuna coil went fucking off. and im not using that term lightly. so awesome, i don't even have words. everything is so shitty, but im still in such a good mood from being at the show... its weird. i can't remember the last time i was genuinely happy like this, its a relatively unfamiliar feeling. a mini-review of the show will be posted tomorrow, i promise, i know i've been slack lately... and i'll add a full review as well as scans of my pictures in the 'other music' section under 'don't trust', asap. as soon as i get some free time, im going to totally rework my site. im no longer going to have a kh section, instead, the 3rd section of my site will just be a sort of archive of pictures and info of bands/groups.singers/ect. that i like. so ... yeah. go on and scream at me

[11 Nov 2003|06:53pm] [ mood | excited ] [ music | lacuna coil - senzafine ] I GOT MY LACUNA COIL TICKETS! WOOOOO!!!!!! this sunday, nov 16th @ the north star bar in philly! i can't wait! yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay! go on and scream at me

[09 Nov 2003|09:46pm] [ mood | aggravated ] [ music | the tv. ] mom has been watching the jessica lynch movie and now the elizabeth smart movie. why does corporate america feel the need to commercialize everything. just because they are so-called tragedies turned so-called miracles, doesn't entitle big business to suck every last cent out of them. i mean, these were big deal, life and death, serious as a heart attack, situations... and here we are making tv-movies out of them. where's the respect? p.s. ( cristina scabbia )is beautiful... go download some lacuna coil songs... go on and scream at me

[06 Nov 2003|10:24pm] [ mood | tired ] [ music | ani difranco - promised land ] ( ani is my idol ) no bliss for little miss leading she's learning about bleeding... me, most optimistic? its funny cause it couldn't be farther from the truth. go on and scream at me

[03 Nov 2003|11:08pm] [ mood | there isn't an appropriate word. ] [ music | the tv. grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. ] so i got my SAT grades back in the mail. i already knew what i got though. as i pulled in the driveway, mom and dad came out of the front doo,r glaring at me and motoining me to turn the car off and come inside. i yelled out the window that i knew what i got already and that i had know for the last 5 days and pulled away. i was late for work. so i got to work, and about a half hour later mom calls and starts bitching at me about my score. come on! how fucking immature?! she calls me at work to yell at me? couldn't she wait an hour and a half til i got home? so i come home and get yelled at by mom. she asks me why i didn't tell them my score if i knew it ahead of time... and i told her the truth. cause i wanted to avoid getting in trouble (exactly what was happening). i didn't want to get in trouble because everyone was expecting so much more from me. everyone's expectations are too high. and she goes on to try to convince me that im not in trouble, that she's just mad that i didn't tell her and dad since they were the ones to pay for the test. bull shit. if they weren't gonna yell at me then what was with the attitude when i pulled up? and it wasn't just the attitude, it was the way my dad was looking at me and glaring and gesturing, that really pissed me off... even more than i already was. and when you're as fucked up as i am, even the little things make a really really really big deal. i know my score wasn't anything great, im actually really upset with it. im upset with myself, im upset cause everyone is going to be upset with me. everyone wants so much... mom tried to tell me that it didn't matter what grade i got as long as i tried my best, and she knows that's what i'm doing. well, i know that, but i don't think that my best is good enough. the rest of the day was shit. i just want everyone here to leave me the fuck alone. it's not a real hard concept to understand. i'm so fucking tired, why can't people see that? i wake up at 5:30 and go to school and work and come home and do homework and don't get done til 9, and i want to sit down and relax for an hour before go to bed... i don't want to sit here and argue with her over my attitude problem. im sorry if i have an attitude problem, but i don't know what else to do with my emotions. im so stressed and they want me to be the perfect little servant girl. well, i don't have time for that shit. i barely have time to keep myself sane. i know i'm not the only one in this house with a busy schedule, but nobody here has such a hard work load. no one here has ever had such a hard work load. neither of my parents went to college, so they don't know the stress of applicatons, due dates, essays, scholarships, guidance appointments, ect. neither of them have ever taken the SATs, so they don't know the stress of studying and waiting for the scores and being so fucking dissapointed. neither of them ever went to a school like padua, they don't know the stress of grades and homework, and essays, on top of everything else. so how can they criticize me? why won't they just LEAVE ME ALONE! grrrr, why won't livejournal work?! i want to update my livejournal! damn it!!! go on and scream at me

[31 Oct 2003|09:13pm] [ mood | depressed ] [ music | mom watching 'bridget jones's diary' ] ( the world to come ) why am i so lame that every post i've been making is made up of quotes. have i lost the ability to form functional sentances? in all honesty, i think its because im too much of a fucktard to verbalize anything i've been thinking. the things i've been thinking lately are not appropriate for an online journal, anyway. yeah, so im depressed. that's my life, that's who i always am, that's how i've always been, that's how i'll always be. i just hide it better than others most of the time. it's just... i've been more depressed than usual lately, to put it as simply as possible (and trust me, its a lot more chaotic than this little paragraph made it seem) and it's really wearing on me... i've had enough. my headache is back... for the millionth time. p.s. it doesn't feel like halloween go on and scream at me

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