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| 06:01am 02/09/2005 |
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i'm going back to all of my old jurnals that i can, hopefully i will remember them again when i am not drunk and will post more in here than just this. but if i dont, and you want to read up...
livejournal: angelofthenight
deadjournal: mistress
and now i have to go to melodramatic and try to remember my username... wish me luck. |
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| bye bye computer |
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| 09:06pm 25/09/2003 |
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so, i am going to be complaining like hell as soon as i get my own internet access, which will be CABLE and not shitty dial-up. but mostly bitching about kelly and her shitty lack of lack of skills. any kind of skills. i could go on forever, but my time with the computer is limited for now, so i will just leave it at that. oh yea, and after 2 months without sex, i finnally got laid by someone worth getting laid by. his name is david, he's really sweet, he wants something exclusive, but im waiting to see how the dating thing pans out with him. i forgot i was supposed to ask dusting before i had sex with anyone else though. hehe. its okay though, he said i could. jeezus that man is strange. |
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| oh god, please give me the strength to NOT kill her |
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| 02:49pm 23/09/2003 |
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and it just got worse and worse and i dont want to talk about it.
see misty cry
because she cannot kill
watch misty slit her writsts
die, misty, die |
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| suck suck suck |
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| 07:27pm 21/09/2003 |
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wow, what a sucky day. it all began at midnight. the guys started getting grabby. by 1, a couple of the girls were getting bitched at. by 2, there was drama between most of the girls, which progressed for the rest of the night. by 3, i realized that the acid guy wasnt coming. got to get offline, more later. and yes, it gets worse. |
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| too true |
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| 04:22am 17/09/2003 |
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"kelly and i need to be separated, us living under the same roof isn't healthy for anyone." wow i hit that nail right on the head. it occurs to me that before nyssa and whitney came here they were spending every day together and there was no drama there. but then again, they werent surrounded by a negative kind-of hate-tention. everyone is fighting and it seems like every time someone else fights, kelly and i fight. i mean, we only have 21 more days left, we should atleast attempt to be nice to one another. we dont even have time for fighting anymore, we should make what little time we have at the apartment enjoyable. and i have to say congratulations to jeff and jd for being able to stay out of all this bullshit. i still dont know how jeff dose it, but jd seems to be sticking to just staying out of it all. |
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| god, i hate you |
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| 11:31am 16/09/2003 |
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you fucking selfish whores. everyone around here is pulling their own weight except for you two assholes and you are the only ones i cant kick out! we are all trying to help eachother get on our feet but you two dont care about anyone but yourselves. i realize that neither of you have to actually work (because sitting on your ass isnt work) but the rest of us have things to do in the morning and we need sleep. nyssa has school in the morning, i have work, and whitney drives me to work and you guys sleep. sleep and drink and go on journeys for the purpose of finding someone to buy you drinks. this is your life. wow. dosnt it just make you feel worthless? |
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| yey. i got to go to church. |
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| 07:54am 08/09/2003 |
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finally, after weeks and weeks of missing out on the lizard lounge, i got to go. i am appearantly still dating jinx and i got this really hot chick's number and she is a fantastic kisser. i brought home a pretty boy with me. i told him a little while ago that i'm a tease and im mean about it. i figured he had the right to know. especially since he's a hot guy and i dont want him to think that i'm not interested. i just think the game is fun :) or atleast it's fun with guys. there arent enough girls that like me that i can fuck with playing the game. hell, i sat with casey for almost an hour before i told her i thought she was beautiful because im fucking shy. i got so many ego-boosts too, when i was dancing in the vidio bar some guy came up to me and told me i was in the wrong fucking room and lead me into the main room so i could dance there. when i was in there a guy came up to me and said, i think your the sexiest girl in this room, and you have been for months, every time your here, i love to watch you dance. i found out steve-o aquired a girlfriend, which means he is no longer available for me to make into one of my boys :( |
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| fucking bitch |
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| 05:01pm 30/08/2003 |
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i just found my engagement ring sitting by the computer. i havent worn it since the week after i moved into this apartment. the last time i even saw it was when i threw it on my floor about a month ago. this is the first time ive been at the computer in the past week. stupid bitch-ass h0! stop taking my shit! first my money, then my spiked bracelet and now my FUCKING ENGAGEMENT RING?!?!? i mean, i know i havent been with the guy in over half a year, but that was my FIRST and ONLY enagement.
your worthless, you should kill yourself. |
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| my first entry |
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| 03:04pm 30/08/2003 |
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S/M
I am the barbed wire
wrapped around your chest
scratching your skin
piercing your skin
cutting your soul
blood swelling
and pushing
to your outer layers
spilling down your skin
soft and crimson
as the bed of roses
on which you lay
your blindfolded eyes
see nothing but my love for you
your hands and feet
bound willingly
your trust in god
placed in me
the stinging caress
of the blade down your back
the feather-light touch of my lips
kissing away your skin's bloody tears
light fingers running down your sides
tickleing your senses
tracing your scars
killing you all over again
my submissive beauty |
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