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Nobody's brown eyed girl

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[06 Jun 2004|09:39am]
"The runway lights are the deepest blue like the color of your eyes..."

Well that's very sweet, except that runway lights are not blue.
Heh.
And neither are my eyes...Good thing.

Hrm.

I finished Ender's Game last night, it was a very good book.
I have to finish moving into my summer room.

But right now I have to go brush my teeth and wake up. see ya.
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Hrm. [03 Jun 2004|01:50pm]
You, know I've never really had anything that made me feel *content* all on my own. I have felt content because of other people...like knowing that they are there and all that good stuff. but that is different. Flying does that though.

I mean, yeah I've done things that make me feel happy, all the years at the SPCA, a day at the barn, swimming, music. They all are fun to do, and I always feel good afterwards, but it's more superficial. Not in a bad way, just lacking the right word...

I think the thing with flying, especially solo, is that you aren't just doing something you love to do, you are doing something you have to do...at least once you leave the ground. There is so much responsibility on you once you take off, you have to be so aware of everything. And I am nowhere near mastering it, but I'm a lot more comfortable in the air by myself now than I was a few months ago. and it sort of feels good to know that I can climb a mile into the air, by myself and tool around some 30 miles away and know where I am, and feel confident at it.

I think it's a confidence thing mostly. It's not like anything else...when you play music there is stage fright, performance anxiety whatever. And even when you just play for yourself, there is still some level of performance you want to acheive...but with flying, it isn't really about making look the best or sound the best, you *have* to do everything right, or bad things can happen.

I don't really know how to explain it. But there isn't any other feeling like walking out to a plane by yourself, knowing that if something goes wrong, it's all you...and not being afraid of it.

I got to fly today, just out to the practice area to putz around. It was great.
Had my first real use of an "emergency" checklist. The volts light came on while I was taxiing, and the ammeter showed a discharge. that just means that the battery wasn't getting enough electricty from the alternator to be charging up. This can come on when the engine is running at low RPMs because the alternator belt which is connected to the prop is spinning slower, so the alternator isn't making as much charge. But the volts light illuminated sporadically all through taxi, which it's normal if it flashes sometimes. but then it stayed on throughout run up, which you do at high rpms, so it should go away.
Soooo all you have to do is shut off your avionics switch, check the alternator circuit breaker, turn off the battery and the alternator and then turn it back on. Which I did, and the light didn't come on, so it was good to go!
It felt good that I knew what to do. :D
And then when I was out there, the clouds when up a little bit but they came right back down. And then I saw rain coming! sooo I came back to nashua, and did touch and goes. Turns out I was right because as soon as I go oout of the airplane, it started to rain. Hehe.

It was a good flight.

i think I like flying so much because when you are flying, you don't feel needy and lonely like you do on the ground. You can't when you are in the air. So you don't.
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[02 Jun 2004|10:54pm]
"He's gotta be somebody's baby, he must be somebody's baby....he's gotta be somebody's baby, he's so fine....he's probably somebody's only light, kinda sad tonight...."

But he's definately not mine. le sigh.
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[31 May 2004|12:17pm]
I think I can relate this song to more than one aspect of my life sometimes.

Walk Away - Ben Harper

Oh no- here comes that sun again.
And (that) means another day without you my friend.
And it hurts me to look into the mirror at myself.
And it hurts even more to have to be with somebody else.

And it's so hard to do and so easy to say.
But sometimes - sometimes,
you just have to walk away - walk away.

With so many people to love in my life, why do I worry about one?
But you put the happy in my ness, you put the good times into my fun.

And it's so hard to do and so easy to say.
But sometimes - sometimes,
you just have to walk away - walk away and head for the door.

We've tried the goodbye so many days.
We walk in the same direction so that we could never stray.
They say if you love somebody than you have got to set them free,
but I would rather be locked to you than live in this pain and misery.
They say time will make all this go away,
but it's time that has taken my tomorrows and turned them into yesterdays.
And once again that rising sun is droppin' on down
And once again, you my friend, are nowhere to be found.

And it's so hard to do and so easy to say.
But sometimes, sometimes you just have to walk away, walk away and head for the door.
You just walk away - walk away - walk away.
You just walk away, walk on, turn and head for the door.
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[30 May 2004|12:45am]
"So excuse me forgetting, but these things I do...You see I've forgotten if they're green or they're blue...but well the thing is, what I really mean, yours are the sweetest eyes I've ever seen"

But he doesn't know. Of course he doesn't!! Phew. Alas.
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[29 May 2004|01:47pm]
I was thinking about when me and Marge went flying last night. And either one of us could have very well been flying alone, and been just fine. But since it was both of us, when one was flying the other person did the radios. And I never realized how much you have to think about when you fly. I mean, yeah, I know I have to think about it when I am flying, but I didn't realize exactly how much it was until I saw someone else do it. Because when you fly with an instructor, you never really see him or her fly the plane, it's pretty much all you.
Though last night it was fairly busy in the pattern. I think I am going to go swimming today.

See ya.
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Flying at night. [28 May 2004|10:44pm]
Flying at night is awesome. It's great. When the clouds are out and the moon is out, and its just right it looks like leopard print. And the runway lights.

After 9 the tower at Nashua closes, so the lights have to be controlled by the pilot keying the mike 5 times. The one time we landed, they had just gone out and we were doign stop and goes so we were stopped on the runway. Marge, the instructor that took me up, keyed the mike and they came on right in front of us. that was cool.

Then fog started to come in as we were finish up, and you could see it around the runway lights.


AND I don't know if it said it in here or not, but I flew the glider! it's so coool. you get to shut the engine off in flight, and...glide...and then you do this thing called a Max Effort landing, where you come in at 700 ft over the end of the runway, and you just DIVE.
But the thing about the glider is that it is slow. Best speed to fly in the glider is a speed you want to stay above in the 172 because it does not give you a very big margine before you stall. So I have't flown the 172 in quite some time, and even though i have only flown the glider twice, it really threw me off going back to the 172. But after the first landing, it was nice and familiar again. It wasnt to bad, considering its been an even longer time since I flew at night.

Aw man, I love it.

I love flying, I when people can smile, I love when people can laugh, I love when people do what they love to do. A lot of the instructors at the flight center are like that, it's nice to be around them. It makes you feel sort of safe in a way, to know that there really are happy people out there. Or so it seems anyway.

Doo doo doo. Okay I'm out for now.
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wtf?! [26 May 2004|10:46pm]
he might not smile very often, or all the time. But when you can get him smiling, it's a real smile. A little goofy maybe, but a real, genuine, honest to goodness smile. Not one of those crappy half second smiles either, a strong one. One that you can see and know that everything is completely alright if even for just several minutes. And when you can make someone smile like that, you can't help but have the same kind of smile with them yourself. You feel real good afterward to, making someone grin like that. But really, it's them who is giving to you because seeing them like that....its like they are sharing something with you, some little piece of real happiness that everyone in the world should be able to have.
Man, I love people who smile like that. They are few and far between but there should be more of them. We should vote for a president that smiles like that, because then he or she would make the entire country smile like that, and then all the other world leaders and then all the other countries in the world. It'd be fantastic!!
Do you know anyone like that? Don't take them for granted. Because when they are gone something good will go with them. Make sure they know you don't take them for granted.

Man, I definately did not date a lot of people through high school. Just 2. but when we did date, it was for a fairly long time. And I wondered why I have been so ancy to have someone like that again, because I never did date a lot. But then I realized that yeah I was single til...whenever me and Dan started going out but then I wasn't single again til we broke up, nearly 2 years later...and then I was single again for a few months...and then not for another year and a half. And that was that. So its been awhile, and I think i am ready for a change. :/ But I dont know if maybe I am just lonely cause everyone went home for the summer.
I want someone I can be silly with, joke around and they won't make fun of my stupid jokes and someone who is not going to take me seriously all the time. It'd be nice if they could make me laugh, but that's not real difficult to do. They'd have to be confident but not overly confident. Someone who...may not necessarily know where they are going in the long run, but put themselves into whatever they were doing. But then they'd also be able to have a serious conversation with me every so often. It'd be good if they could put up with me talking about airplanes all the time...or even liked it. Maybe theyd like learning about stuff like that, and then they'd like teaching me about whatever they were into.

I never thought I was real picky. But maybe I am. Though I think that in general I am pretty laid back. ::shrug:: whatever.

MMM I made a good sandwich today. It was really really good.

Soooo life goes on.


Jeezzz I called home today and my parents were freaking out all thinking something was wrong. It was sorta annoying. I mean, it is nice that they care...but if something is really wrong, you'd think I'd have the sense to say so. That's the other thing. If I ever dated someone, theyd have to accept that if something is wrong I'd probably tell them. OR they'd be able to deal with the fact that I didn't want to tell them right away.

hrm.

SMALL ANIMAL!

there was a chipmunk outside today.

Love may be the sweetest thing, but its also a bastard. :P hehe.

Okay I'm done!
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arg [25 May 2004|09:25pm]
Yeah, so there was this guy I was fairly crazy about. But you know how the story goes...there is that tendency to pick out the ones that are unavailable for several reasons, and then you find out what reason it is and you are crushed for about 2 seconds and then remember that you didn't have the guts to say or do anything anyway and that even if you did, you knew nothing was going to happen anyway so whats the big deal? Oh well what're you gonna do? Life goes on. wouldnt have worked anyway. Wouldnt even have gotten going to have a chance to work.

Back to immersing myself into the world of academia. Which has actually been quite satisfying. Its sorta sad, but I think that learning things, especially things that I find interesting has become like a comfort zone or safety blanket. I don't care though. I like that. It's bittersweet but you don't need guts to confront books. You do need guts to confront other people. It is funny though, because usually about anything I am a very blunt straightfoward "this is how it is" person. Until it comes to emotional mushy crap. Psh whatever. If they are really interested, I'd be able to tell right? Or not because they could do what I do and just hide.

I miss my friends who went home for the summer. Well mostly just Andrew mason cause he was my "drinking buddy". Except that neither of us drink. so really he was just someone I could go to and tell stuff too and know that he wasnt going judge anything. I think he understood that just cause I had a problem I was ranting about didnt mean I expected advice back. Because I think that when people think that I am excpecting advice back on somethings it can put them in a weird spot. which is understandable.

Okay well I'm out for now. I will be back, hopefully.
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[24 May 2004|12:04pm]
Okay well I have to go read for english...

EEEEk. I went home this weekend. it was good. but didnt get to see all the people I would have liked. Oh well.

Ah, okay, I'm out for now. Adios
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[17 May 2004|11:46pm]
hrm, I am taking an english class called critical inquiry (ID110) and I really like it. Aside from being monday nights 5:30-10:30...but the teacher let us out around 9 tonight. Or at least he meant to..we didnt actually get out of there til 9:20, which I wouldn't have minded except that I reaaaally had to pee from 8:50...and waited cause I thought he'd let us go. it seems like it's going to be a really interesting class. the whole point of it is to see how "science and literature have affected everyday society" or something like that. The book we had to buy was a book I was looking at a few months ago, but didn't have enough money to buy, "In search of Shrodingers Cat". How awesome is that?? I was way to into this class. We talked about beliefs, and lots of stuff that we learned in theology and the book is all about quantum physics, and stuff we learned in physics this past year. It's going to be an awesome class I think. We have to write a paper about Darwin?!!
That's awesome. I'm a dork.

So my first flight after getting my private pilot certificate seems like it is going to be right through Boston's airspace. It'll be fun. To Hyannis. And then...To nantucket!
But before getting to Nantucket, i am going to overfly Martha's Vineyard, because of the gliding to land over water. You want to make it so that no matter where you are in the air you are somewhere that you could glide to a place to land if your engine went out in flight.

Man, i am way to enthused about this ID110 class. I actually want to write these papers, and there were so many ideas that the teacher got going in my head. that I am sure you will hear about in here, eventually.

I am taking another english class, this one is online, it's EN215, professional writing. It's alright, but it is not going to be nearly as exciting as ID110. The book is called Business Communication...booooring. But actually the reading isn't so bad so far. It's
not enthralling like the ID110 stuff, but I don't doze off completely reading it.

I read Farenheit 451 yesterday. Didn't just finish, read it. It was really really good.
I think that I am going to read a lot more this summer than I have gotten to recently.
Let the summer of science fiction begin!

Man, I can't wait until next september when I get to start Engineering Design. it's going to be great. And the best part is,there are going to be 2 other flight majors in the class with me. Reina is doing what I am doing, she is going to double major and Juan was thinking about it. Reina is a freshman though, and Juan is scheduled to graduate in may. Last I heard from him, he wasn't going to major in engineering, just wanted something else. it'll be cool to finally have other flight people there. And I already might have an idea for the big engineering 2 project, but it's sorta boring. I wanted to come up with something the flight center could use too, but instead it's just a desk that you could lie a computer monitor flat in. Because in the engineering lab there are HUGE computer monitors for each computer, but if you want to sit so that you can comfortably view them,
you cannot see the board. Sooo I figure if we design a desk with a hole in it, you can place the monitor flat, or at least make it adjustable so that you can move them up and down depending on if you need to see the blackboard or not. it sounds easy, and i think it won't be to hard, except that I want to make it so that there isn't a glare coming off the screen, and we are going to have to calculate all kinds of stuff about how much the thing can hold and what not. And it's going to be difficult to make it an entire desk, because the desks are huge, and it seems that most of the stuff the people design in that class are made out of metal, I think aluminum. So the question is would a big piece of aluminum metal be cheaper than just getting computer monitors you can fold flat.
Anyway, it's just an idea. And we'd just be making one. But in real life, if that idea were to be implemented, that would be a question asked and if the answer was that it would be more expensive than just getting a new monitor, the idea wouldn't go through. Plus I think i want to come up with a more interesting idea.

I need to look into getting a job at a local FBO in the hangar.

Oh jeez. blah blah blah. pssh...sorry folks.

Girls are dumb, and bitchy and mean.

oooh I reorganized my flight bag. MMmm I love flying so much. Ugh. But I must finish a glider checkout quiz. that is a pain in the tuckus...but...it means I get to fly the glider soon!!! huzzah!!! :DDD

hrm. i have to work line crew early tomorrow morning. I should go to bed soon.

I am thinking about getting another piercing, in my ears.
And I need to get a haircut.

Roooaaarrrr!!! Eeeek. My middle name is 7. :D
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[16 May 2004|11:46pm]
Do you remember that Cherry Cola song by Savage Garden? It is a few years old. I really like it. Heh. Getting old. that song came out...in what? the lower villa years? aye carumba.
Hehe. Uh...OOooooh I need to tell someone but no. Oh well.

"Come stand a little bit closer, Breathe in and get a bit higher you'll
never know what hit you when I get to you"
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[16 May 2004|11:36pm]
The A-10s left today. *tear*.

In other news...
I got nothin'. Heh.
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The clouds don't seem so far away anymore... [14 May 2004|11:20pm]
so not much has happened....

Except that I got my private pilot certificate yesterday! I can carry passengers, and fly at night by myself now...and a few other things but those 2 are the coolest ones.

But, if you think that is exciting...

There are 2 A-10s sitting on our ramp right now!! not just 1, 2!!! ::drool:: It's sexy man.
Unfortunately, it's not *a* sexy man, but that's alright. :D hehe.

Oh man, its so unreal, they are huuuge! well compared to our little planes they are huge...they are just sitting there! its awesome. like whoa...I have pictures of them, I should post them. I have a lot of pictures i should post but haven't.

Anyway, I get to fly the glider soon! I can't wait, it'll be awesome. But before I can fly that, I have to get done another solo cross country....My instructor has me flying to Hyannis and Quonsett or Nantuckent or Newport...I can pick the second airport. But going to Hyannis has me putzing right through Boston's airspace...it'll be fun. hehe. Over the water, and through Class B....

It's the last night people are on campus besides those who are staying the summer, and they've got fireworks.
I've got no fireworks. But I've got a pilot certificate! and A-10s withing walking distance! :DDD

Okay. I'm out. you should call me. :DD
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[11 May 2004|09:43am]
Grrr....arg....

Uh, I am probably not coming home this weekend afterall. another weekend maybe.

le sigh.

"if only she knew" by OAR is a good song.

doo doo doo...
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[09 May 2004|06:00pm]
Hrm. you looked nice today. even if it wasn't tied exactly right.

Back to how it used to be with me.
cause I never learn!! ::smack:: silly me.

I might come home this thursday. but I have to be back here by sunday night.

aaaah. I'll keep dreaming, I think I'm better at that.
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[04 May 2004|10:58pm]
playlist on random, one line from the first 20 songs:

1. Did you ever spend all day thinkin' bout the night, it's something that you do...when your thinkin way to much you're outta sight, watchya gonna do? Cause I don't want no one to take a piece of my heart.

hrm, let me tell you about some things about flying

(2. don't bother to pack your bags, or your map, we won't need them where we're going...)

Okay so if you are goin' on a xc you have to plan cruise performance for whatever pressure altitude. So you have to get altimeter settings along the way and figure what the pressure altitude will be enroute. Then you user that along with a table in the POH to figure out KTAS and gph. You also have to figure out different winds aloft enroute, and use them to compute wind correction for heading and groundspeed. You have to record what time you took off and then compute your actual groundspeed as you are flying. You also have to remember to lean the engine for cruise!!
If you divert, you first take down the time at that time, and know where you are. Fly an approximate heading, and then figure out your real heading with a plotter and then account for wind correction. Then figure your groundspeed and figure out how long it will take you to get to where you are going, and if possible figure how many gallons of fuel you will burn. Whip out an AFD and figure out any important information for the airport you are going to and talk to anyone you need to talk to.
(3. laughin and a runnin hey hey, in the misty morning fog...our hearts are thumping, and you, a brown eyed girl)
For a short field landing, you want to come in slower than you normally would, but only a little bit, 65-75 knots. over your obstacle you want to have in 30 degrees of flaps and hit your 62 knots. Once you touch down you want flaps up and full braking action.

(4. yeah, i wish we had never bought a king size bed, yeah the only damn thing it's ever been good for is plannin room for the real good sex...lay awake in the dark and all that i can see is the difference of worlds between us, you seem so far from me)

(5. It's just the thought of you in love with someone else, it breaks my heart to see you hanging from your shelf)

In an emergency engine failure, first hit best glide, or 65 knots and look for a place to land, like an airport or large field. Then start your checklist. Check to see if the throttle didn't just slip out. then start making sure that the engine is still getting fuel, check the valve to see that it is on both, make sure the fuel shuttoff valve is full in, and try restarting the engine, using the aux. fuel pump and mixture and ignition if you have too. If it doesn't restart, then start planning a forced landing, after you talk to who you need to talk to. You could talk to the nearest controlling agency, and inform them of your postion and intent and put 7700 in your transponder. For a forced landing, check seatbelts secure and keep holding 65 knots. Fly right over your landing area and enter in a downwind as you normally would, and fly it as a normal pattern.

(6. as soon as you're born you start dieing, so you might as well have a good time.)

For a forced landing check ELT on and turn off whatever electrical equipment you dont need, and start shutting the engine down, as in cutting off fuel from it. Keep the master on until you have down the flaps you are going to use and then turn it off. Right before touch down, unlatch your doors.

(7. where it began, i can't begin to know it, but I know it's growing strong)

For all manuevers, you need to do clearing turns, which can either be 2 90 degree turns, or 1 180 degree turn.

for steep turns, as you enter, add some throttle. hold that bank angle correctly, and have it trimmed correctly for altitude and everything will stay on. it helps to watch the VSI to tell if you are going to climb or descend.

for power off stalls, hold your altitude and slow it up as much as possible. You can and probably will have to use flaps. Once it stalls, release some back pressure and add full power and flaps to 20 degress. Recover by climbing out at 55 knots. once you have a postive rate of climb, you can put up 10 more degrees, and climb at 57. finally, you can put up 10 degrees and climb at 60 and then eventually 79.

For power on stalls, you slow it up until 55 knots, then add full power. When you stall it, release some back pressure and begin to recover by climbing, at 79.

For slow flight, you are going to have flaps in, and reduced power, eventually adding almost full power to overcome induced drag. When turning, make the banks very small, only 5 or so degrees. Recovery from slow flight is going to be very gradual.

(8. Loving would be easy if your colors were like dreams)

So now that that is done. How are you doing? Uh, i have not been up to much, just studying flight stuff, in case you couldnt tell....

Had to something that could never happen didn't it? Oh well. Eh.
My computer is hurt! that is bad.

Urm. yeah, I'm done. :D

9. I don't mind spending every day, out on your corner in the pouring rain...look for the girl with the broken smile, ask her if she wants to stay awhile.
10. sing us a song, of a love that once belonged
11. come away with me and I will write you a song
12. anyone perfect must be lieing, anything easy has its cost anyone plain can be lovely, anyone loved can be lost
13. writing a memory, writing a rhyme, thinking about what is right, what is wrong
14. You are like the sun to me, pride is liquified, I feel so powerless to hold you up above the world you are quite a lot of trouble, such a pretty little girl
15. We could live beside the ocean, leave them far behind, swim out past the breakers and world die
16. you'd think that people would have had enough of silly love songs
17. a thousand other boys could never reach you, how could i hvae been the one...I saw the world spin beneath you
18. yeah, I just might be the one to treat your like you're perfect
19. surprise surprise, couldn't see it in your eyes, but i'm sure it's written all over my face
20. counting the ways, to where you are....
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[02 May 2004|11:56pm]
stupid me and my stupid listening to stupid love songs!!

I flew 2wice yesterday, it was glorious.
Other then that, the weekend was pretty much crap.

Our school was offering tickets to philly for 35 dollars next september and I really wanted to go but I forgot that the meeting to sign up was tonight, so I missed that. Oh well.

In fact, the weekend was really crappy and depressing, except for the 2 or so hours I was 1000+ feet in the air.
I'm tired of being single. But it bothers me that I feel like that. cause people should be able to be single and content at the same time, but I'm not. Unless I'm flying, or being enlightened on some engineering concept i'm to miserable for my own good and I hate it. Someone, quick, smack me with a 2x4 and tell me to stop whining cause this is ridiculous.

I have to wake up early tomorrow. and play with airplanes. I'm hungry.

I miss everyone at home.
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[30 Apr 2004|11:47pm]
Hrm, I'm content. I think. Sure, why not, right? hehe.

I'm close, really really close.
To getting my certificate. mmmmm.

He's a cute kid. and he wasn't drinking so that's a plus. Right? Sure, why the hell not. :P

Eh. eh. okay I am flying tomorrow, that's a good thing. In fact, that's a great thing.

Have an extremely good day.
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[24 Apr 2004|12:18am]
so here I am at the end of the runway, I like it out here. It's better
there are lots of planes flying around though. And when my fingers and toes aren't cold
from standing on top of my car without shoes on. But that is my fault, hehe.

"Oh my dear, you know it's true, I love you deep if only you knew..."

Hrm. The other people here should leave. there are a few cars a few feet away. Oh well,
I suppose they can stay.

I don't know what I wanted to write about. I guess mostly that I miss people.

"Loose myself get lost in you...
If only you knew."

Heh, don't mind the random lyrics. I am listening to music, and its the equivalent to just
singing out loud.

I wrote my first C++ program wednesday night, with the help of CS major friend. It lets
you enter any number of forces up to 5000, and it will figure out the final resultant force
and angles it makes with the x y and z axis.

I don't even know if you noticed, but if you did I'm sorry. But there isn't really anything
we can do about it

"It may be quite simple, but now that its done..I hope you don't mind that Iput down in words
how wonderful life is now your in the world.. sat on the roof and I kickd off to mars, well
some of these versus, they've got me quite cross..."

I wish could sing. But no one probably does, because if I could, I probably would be
singing all the time.

I have to get up early tomorrow, I should go to bed...I am not tired though.


I am so confused, and confusing probably. but if I confuse you, just don't deal with
me and so then you can stop complaining about me.

"husslers grab your guns, your shadow weighs a ton...."
"nothing's going to stop me now, california here we come...."

I should go there. I think I want to live there. And then it will be easier to visit Greg
when he moves there. I will miss him, but I am not around home all to often now anyway.

I think greg moving is one of those things that makes me realize that we're growing up.
ANd that all my friends I had in school and growing up aren't always going to be a drive
away. That now its going to be like when you hear your parents talk about so and so that
know across the country and they never talk to anymore, but would love to hear from, and
wonder how they are doing.

But its not going to be like htat, cause I dont intend to knowingly loose touch with people.

My car still smells like dog. I miss my dogs.

"and it won't mean a thing in a hundred years...."
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