September 8th, 2003 • 12:29 am

Ah this feels good. I can see my friends protected posts once again. It was annoying not to be able to read them the other day. I did try to catch up with everyone today.

Because I had nothing better to do - I changed my layout once again - I was bored. I only changed my main page though - to lazy to figure it out for the other pages.

Incidentally someone is reading my journal from New Zealand – I have no clue who it is. Oh yeah then there is MTV Finland – why the fuck would anyone from there read my journal? Whoever you are from New Zealand – you’re here religiously – at least leave a little comment or two.

MTV Finland – welcome – I guess. I wonder how you found me – your visits are getting more frequent. Leave a comment sometime.

Monk - you should read Cows, Pigs, Wars, and Witches: The Riddles of Culture, by Marvin Harris. It's a book that shows no matter how bizarre a cultures' behavior may appear - that there is always an identifiable and intelligable sources for said behavior.

:: mood: amused

August 14th, 2003 • 4:44 pm
Porque?

*
Hmmm - What's going on? Why is power out in so many cities? Including NYC. Anyone hear anything?
7 Opinions| Say it!

:: mood: contemplative

July 30th, 2003 • 5:02 pm

*
- rely on the message, not on the personality of the teacher.
- rely on the meaning, not just the words.
- rely on the real meaning, not just the provisional meaning.
- rely on your wisdom and insight, not just on your ordinary, judgmental mind.

siddharta gautama (buddha)
10 Opinions| Say it!

:: mood: peaceful

July 12th, 2003 • 2:47 am
Wow good news!

*
Whoa I've been stamped by blurtybest!

Image created by kirajade

12 Opinions| Say it!

:: mood: Honored

June 25th, 2003 • 10:50 pm
Noble Truths

*
Life is good – but we have to seek its goodness. We have to acknowledge our own hand in our own suffering – and then somehow find a way to overcome that suffering.

I’ve mistaken the idea of non-attachment as not making an effort to change things – not having any desire to change things. This gets tricky – because indeed – I think – the four noble truths include the statement that – ”desire causes suffering” – or words to that effect.
26 Opinions| Say it!

:: mood: disappointed

June 25th, 2003 • 12:25 pm

And the thing is - I still believe in love.

And the only people who believe in love are the people who believe that no one else has quite felt it the way they have.
8 Opinions| Say it!

:: mood: crushed

June 24th, 2003 • 11:47 pm
Exhale - Inhale

*
There are some people to whom I'd like to say

"Don't love me. I won't be around forever and I'm not worth it"

There are other people to whom I'd like to say

"If you tell me you love me, I could live forever."

Breathe )

17 Opinions| Say it!

:: mood: drained

June 23rd, 2003 • 3:28 am
Tzvetzo is a Sag...wonder where he is now...

sagittarius lover



You'll Fall in Love With A Sagittarius!


You are naturally attracted to Sag's sophistication, intellect, and wisdom.

Sagittarius is a perfect match for your intellectual curiosity and dreamlike nature.

You will find a wealth of subjects to share with Sag - including philosophy, spirituality, and sexuality.



Sagittarius is naturally curious - and wants to learn everything about you.

Your Sag will probe you with all sorts of personal questions, about your past and sexual preferences.

Answer truthfully, and you'll create the deep connection that you and your Sag crave.



Sometimes it is difficult for Sagittarius to let go and fall in love.

Treat your Sag as a friend first - even if your intentions are different.

Once you prove that you are into your Sag's mind, his or her heart will follow.




LOL - Sag's are such sluts! I did adore my SAG though - he was ever so pretty.

7 Opinions| Say it!

:: mood: numb

June 21st, 2003 • 9:59 pm
I am not resigned...

*
"Gently they go, the beautiful, the tender, the kind;

Quietly they go, the intelligent, the witty, the brave.

I know. But I do not approve. And I am not resigned."


- Edna St. Vincent Millay

3 Opinions| Say it!

:: mood: pensive

June 19th, 2003 • 10:11 pm
Hallucinations & the moon.

*
Last night my body felt so empty it refused to sleep.

I sat outside in the grip of darkness' beginning – hallucinating.

Silently thanking the world for making me remember the moon.
16 Opinions| Say it!

:: mood: drained

June 19th, 2003 • 10:59 am
Vita Veritas I

*
I hate when I'm feeling lonely.

There is this pit in the middle of my chest that opens up and feels like an impassable canyon blocking my road to something better.

I know that I'm not alone. I have friends and family who touch my life.

I also have this journal which is my therapy that helps me to let go of all that.
10 Opinions| Say it!

:: mood: melancholy

June 18th, 2003 • 8:17 pm
Addictions

*
The perfect gesture – it comes instinctively. Make sure you don’t touch the small of his back. While sitting beside each other contemplating the world – resist gently tracing his fingers with yours.

Habits )

11 Opinions| Say it!

:: mood: contemplative

June 17th, 2003 • 10:27 am
Noli nothis permittere te terere.

*
This is not a state of being without nothingness nor is it a state of nothingness without being. Sartre & Heidegger were not wrong but they are – somewhat – out-dated. I think it has something to do with alignment & a certain newfound sense of mockery.
2 Opinions| Say it!

:: mood: moody

June 16th, 2003 • 11:57 pm
Dum dee dum dum dum...

*
Boo!!! )

31 Opinions| Say it!

:: mood: amused

June 15th, 2003 • 9:11 pm
The torture ends now...

*
I'm 41 - I'll be 42 in September.

Now anyone want to know what I look like?
12 Opinions| Say it!

:: mood: giddy

June 14th, 2003 • 7:27 am
Hmmm

*
Let's see how well you all know me - can you guess how old I am? Come on try.
19 Opinions| Say it!

:: mood: crazy

June 12th, 2003 • 10:57 pm
Por qué - Pourquoi - Perchè - Bakit???

*
My back hurts.

I should lie down for a while & un-curve it.

Over the years I have bent my spine into a question mark –

so that I never have to form the words to that question I always seem to be asking:

Why…

Why, Why, Why... )

8 Opinions| Say it!

:: mood: uncomfortable

June 12th, 2003 • 1:54 am
Life jacket anyone???

*
You ever feel like you're in so much pain there's no end in sight?

How deep is pain exactly?

How deep can it get?

Certainly deep enough to drown you.

I'm glad I know how to swim - now let's hope it stays calm.
5 Opinions| Say it!

:: mood: drained

June 10th, 2003 • 2:44 pm
Per sina's post...

*
*

INTERVIEW ME!!!


This was her post;

"there seems to be an interview thing going around on livejournal that sounds interesting. i think we should try it. it's sort of a circular thing. if you want to be interviewed, make a post in your journal that says "interview me!" and i (and hopefully lots of other folks) will respond with a comment with five questions for you answer. just note who asked them. this entitles you to ask five (different) questions of me, which i will answer. be creative, don't use generic survey questions, get personal, play nice, have fun!"

So ask away. I'll answer all questions honestly - well as much as I can...
43 Opinions| Say it!

:: mood: silly

June 10th, 2003 • 12:25 am
A-N-T-I-C-I-P-A-T-I-O-N...

*
Excitement.

A creeping anticipation on what I might say – what I might think what part of my being I might allow to slip out of my mind and onto this canvas. My canvas. Treading on an hour and a half of sleep gets me into this mood. A silly little dream world. And so here – in this world, I am presiding – until I finally make it back to my warm bed and my music and, home.
Say it!

:: mood: sleepy


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