Froolie

History

15th August 2004

10:49am: ok...so wow...
So...a LOT has happened since i last updated. Monday-i dont know and i dont really care, it was a long time ago and im too stupid to remember what happened...oh-i got my schedule which SUCKS and i think im gonna get it changed cause the whole history last hour thing, it just isn't gonna work with me and cross. And o0o0o yea-it was the first practice for cross...AWESOME im SOOO excited for this season. And anyways-then on Tuesday-i dont know what i did during the day-probably nothing knowing me, but that night i went over to Carlot and Rachies....fun times, fun times. Especially at Burger King when i ah..."wet myself" lmao...i think that's like the 3rd time that ive done that to make someone laugh, and it took all i had not to burst out laughing when i went up to get my pie...wow...that was fun. Then we went to the park later and Alex met us there...and we rolled down the hill..it was fun but there were scary guys there and it wasn't cool-Carlot and me didn't like it very much. Then on Wednesday-i probably did nothing during the day again, but we ran 4 1/2 miles at practice-i thought i was gonna die, i dont think ive ever ran that far before, but i did it and i was proud of myself and it really made me feel better. And then Thursday, dont think i did anything, but we ran the same course at practice, and i improved my time by 2 minutes! Yay for me...lol. o0o-wait, Aunt Maria called that day to tell us that it was family day at the pool Friday, so i talked to Roxi about going, and then staying with Babbo for a while and it was ok. So..then Friday morning, i woke up at 7...what fun and i got packed and got ready and we headed down to Flushing. So, we got to the pool and i swam with Brianne, Stacia, Kelton, and Kailee...omg-they are adorable. They kept making me go get a 10 lb. brick off the bottom of the pool...lol-they're so adorable. i love them. But then, i knew i had to run cause i just did. So...you know how cool i am. I decided i was gonna be cool and run up Terrace hill and so i did, and then i started running down River rd. and i just happened to run past his house....wonder how that happened. Lol..but no one was there so it made me kinda sad, so then i decided i was gonna be ultimately cool and run up to Central to see if they were practicing...and nope. So...i ran all over hell-it was fun. Not really...but it was good, i probably ran about 4 miles or so...and then i went back to Roaring 20's cause that's where i told Feffula to meet me, so she got there 10 minutes late, and i was really cold. But G and Ash were with her, so we were gonna take them home and i made Feffula take River rd. cause it was the easiest way and we passed his house and his car was there!!!!! UGH! So Ashley's like-OMG STOP!!!!!!! And i was like OMG NO!!!! DONT DO IT! So...Feffula practically slammed on her brakes and i was like-no-keep going cause i looked like hell. So we took Ashley and G home, then went to Babbo's. And it was fun. Babbo and me went up to school and that's about it. So then on Saturday-of course we had to go shopping. And we went to Kohl's and Babbo got me some new shoes, a new black shirt cause you know me and my black shirts..lol..and this other shirt that i really like-she thought it was a dress...it was fun. Then we went to Target and she got me a blowdryer since Feffula's taking hers with her. So then we came home and had lunch. And then we took our naps, and then we did some other stuff...lol..i forgot-o00o0o0o-wait, we went to the cemetery!!! But then i dont remember what else we did. We went home and made cereal mix...MmMmMmM!!!!! So that night, we watched the Olympics....OMG-Michael Phelps-AwEsOmE-AMAZING swim....he got his first gold medal...very exciting!!! Lol...so then went to bed and i got up and ran this morning-i ran to the cemetery and talked to Mom. I talked to her about this thing.....im not gonna say what it is cause im just not-maybe later...but not now cause im not sure about it yet. And yea...so i talked to her about that, and school starting and stuff. And then i ran back to Babbo's and got packed and everything. Then we went to pick up Mrs. Bushong, and i saw his house again...and his car was there...lol-wow im a freak!!!! Anyways, so then we were coming home and Babbo and Mrs. Bushong were saying all this sweet stuff about me, like Mrs. Bushong, she was like, who always has a beautiful smile and positive attitude. And it just made me feel good. So we got home and i called Aunt Emily about this weekend, and i think we're going down there Friday and staying for the Dream Cruise. It should be fun. And today im going to Caseville with some of the team. I dunno-it'll be fun.

But yea...i've got a LOT of thinking to do about this. I dont even know...its just wow. I'm gonna talk to Will about it when i go down there...cause yea i need to. But i dunno...its crazy and i have to give this a LOT of thought about what im gonna do and ive just yea...i have to look at all aspects of it and decide cause just wow.

But now im gonna go get ready for the beach so buhbye
XoXo-steph
Current Mood: blah
Current Music: Hold On-Jet
8:35pm: DAVIDEK, Debra J. (McCarty) Of Flushing, age 34, died Tuesday, September 2, 1997 at her residence. Funeral services will be held 11AM Friday, September 5, 1997 at Rossell Funeral Home, Fr. Steve Makrayni will officiate. Burial will follow at Flushing Cemetery. Visitation will be 4-9PM Wednesday and 11AM-9PM Thursday. Contributions may be made to the American Cancer Society or charity of choice. Mrs. Davidek was born in Erie, PA December 24, 1962, the daughter of Melvin and Sue (Baker)

...:-/...that's part of Mom's obituary...you know me-totally stupid when it comes to being in a bad mood. I don't know why i looked it up...but i did...and im just yea...i dont know-i just am in a not very good mood right now...
Current Mood: sad
Current Music: When it Goes Down-Something Corporate
10:05pm: sorry i cant be perfect...
So here i am-once again...so..i guess im a big disappointment now. Just cant seem to do anything right. Glad im a fuck-up because id like to spend some time with my own grandma. Heaven forbid i do that. Why doesn't someone just shoot me? I mean, seriously. I am SOOOO DAMN upset and angry right now. Oh, and im hoeing tomorrow-id hate to be even more of a disappointment just because i dont care to walk up and down a damn feild all afternoon-especially when i have to go to practice and probably run....5 miles. And of course it'll be hot and my damn side hurts like a bitch and i dont even know why...but of course-i would LOVE to go hoe....just love it! It'll give me time to think about all the negative shit in my life...wonderful-just what i want and need. Time to think about how much i hate just about everything in my life right now....can't wait. And of course, i wont have my music cause i dont have any batteries for my little radio thing which sucks!! But-just shows that ill do anything not to be an even bigger disappointment than i already am. Don't want that to happen. Not like it'll make a difference. No matter what i do...ill never be good enough.


Hey dad look at me
Think back and talk to me
Did I grow up according to plan?
And do you think I'm wasting my time doing things I wanna do?
But it hurts when you disapprove all along

And now I try hard to make it
I just want to make you proud
I'm never gonna be good enough for you
I can't pretend that I'm alright
And you can't change me

'Cuz we lost it all
Nothing lasts forever
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect
Now it's just too late and
We can't go back
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect

I try not to think
About the pain I feel inside
Did you know you used to be my hero?
All the days you spent with me
Now seem so far away
And it feels like you don't care anymore

And now I try hard to make it
I just want to make you proud
I'm never gonna be good enough for you
I can't stand another fight
And nothing's alright

'Cuz we lost it all
Nothing lasts forever
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect
Now it's just too late and
We can't go back
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect

Nothing's gonna change the things that you said
Nothing's gonna make this right again
Please don't turn your back
I can't believe it's hard
Just to talk to you
But you don't understand

'Cuz we lost it all
Nothing lasts forever
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect
Now it's just too late and
We can't go back
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect

'Cuz we lost it all
Nothing lasts forever
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect
Now it's just too late and
We can't go back
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect


Wow...how true is that song!? Pretty damn... well i guess now im gonna go...
--the disappointment--
Current Music: Perfect-Simple Plan
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