: *No real reason to accept the way things have changed, staring down the barrel of a 45*
So....so much for waking up and feeling better! Ok...last night, i went to my room, and i was gonna write in my journal, and i started crying, so i was like ok...so then i kinda stopped, so i went to write some more and i started crying again, and that happened about 5 times until i finally just gave up, and i got about maybe 6 lines written....and like, i don't even know what's wrong with me. Then i looked at the picture of Mom that i have on my bed and i LOST IT!!!!! And i started talking to her, and i kept saying over and over-i just hope i'm making you proud...and i don't know. It was REALLY bad. So then i put in the cd of her singing and i listened to One Hand, One Heart. And it was really sad, and then i kept crying...then i decided to play solitare and hope that it calmed me down, and thankfully it did. Then i went to bed. And i woke up this morning and i was kinda just like blah, i'm just not in a good mood and i have no idea why. I should be REALLY excited cause i get to see everyone today, but i can't even imagine smiling right now. It is seriously really bad! And i hvae NO idea what's wrong with me...and i just yea...really don't even know what to do. And last night-i wanted to call Victor cause i knew that he'd be up and everything...and i just wanted to talk to him-but no, he's grounded so i couldn't. And just ugh!!!! I really don't know. Maybe once i take a bath i'll be better! I can hope so anyways. I just really wish that i was excited cause I GET TO SEE AUNT NINI!!!!!!! And everyone else that's coming to today's show...but i'm not. Like at all...! Ok....well then...with that i'm gonna go take a bath
-steph
So....so much for waking up and feeling better! Ok...last night, i went to my room, and i was gonna write in my journal, and i started crying, so i was like ok...so then i kinda stopped, so i went to write some more and i started crying again, and that happened about 5 times until i finally just gave up, and i got about maybe 6 lines written....and like, i don't even know what's wrong with me. Then i looked at the picture of Mom that i have on my bed and i LOST IT!!!!! And i started talking to her, and i kept saying over and over-i just hope i'm making you proud...and i don't know. It was REALLY bad. So then i put in the cd of her singing and i listened to One Hand, One Heart. And it was really sad, and then i kept crying...then i decided to play solitare and hope that it calmed me down, and thankfully it did. Then i went to bed. And i woke up this morning and i was kinda just like blah, i'm just not in a good mood and i have no idea why. I should be REALLY excited cause i get to see everyone today, but i can't even imagine smiling right now. It is seriously really bad! And i hvae NO idea what's wrong with me...and i just yea...really don't even know what to do. And last night-i wanted to call Victor cause i knew that he'd be up and everything...and i just wanted to talk to him-but no, he's grounded so i couldn't. And just ugh!!!! I really don't know. Maybe once i take a bath i'll be better! I can hope so anyways. I just really wish that i was excited cause I GET TO SEE AUNT NINI!!!!!!! And everyone else that's coming to today's show...but i'm not. Like at all...! Ok....well then...with that i'm gonna go take a bath
-steph
Current Mood: 
blah
blahCurrent Music: 45-Shinedown