Froolie

9:34pm: ...but you don't wanna be there when it goes down again...
So everything right now is just not cool. I don't know, i feel so bad about this whole thing, and i know i coulda prevented the whole thing. And i just seriously hate this. Right now, more than anything, i just wanna cry. I have this urge to just cry, and i have a feeling that tonight, im just gonna be in bed and i'm just gonna cry. And i just really wish that i wouldn't feel like this. it's stupid for me to feel like this cause i caused the whole thing. And i am just so ugh right now. I'm angry with myself and upset and frustrated. And just i don't even know! I just wanna cry so bad right now...i feel like i can't trust anyone and that everyone's out to get me. That probably isn't a good feeling to have, but i do. I started this thing, and i'm gonna end it too. I'm just gonna forget about the whole thing. I don't know, i just wish that there was someone there that i dont know. I just feel like shit...that basically sums it up, i don't know why, i just do. I'm an awful person and just yea...i do'nt know. And tomorrow i have to run the Shillelagh ::sighs:: and i really don't want to....at all. But i am gonna see some of the family, so that should be good. And hopefully it'll take my mind off of things. Cause that's waht i need right now, something to think about besides this. And i dont know, i'm really angry with myself for getting upset about this, cause i really shouldn't be, i mean, its my fault!!! So just i don't know. I'm gonna go though.