Oracle of Fortunes' Journal
20 most recent posts

Date:2007-04-28 15:05
Subject:"The release of emotion is what ...
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"The release of emotion is what keeps us healthy.  Emotionally healthy."

"That may be, Doctor.  However, I have noted that the healthy release
of emotion is frequently unhealthy for those closest to you."
                -- McCoy and Spock, "Plato's Stepchildren", stardate 5784.3




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Date:2007-04-28 13:12
Subject:An English judge, growing weary ...
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An English judge, growing weary of the barrister's long-winded
summation, leaned over the bench and remarked, "I've heard your
arguments, Sir Geoffrey, and I'm none the wiser!"  Sir Geoffrey
responded, "That may be, Milord, but at least you're better informed!"




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Date:2007-04-28 09:06
Subject:How do you explain Wayne Newton's ...
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How do you explain Wayne Newton's POWER over millions?  It's th'
MOUSTACHE ...  Have you ever noticed th' way it radiates SINCERITY,
HONESTY

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Date:2007-04-27 23:13
Subject:We fight only when there is no ...
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We fight only when there is no other choice.  We prefer the ways of
peaceful contact.
                -- Kirk, "Spectre of the Gun", stardate 4385.3




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Date:2007-04-27 19:05
Subject:I hope something GOOD came in the ...
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I hope something GOOD came in the mail today so I have a REASON to
live!!




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Date:2007-04-27 07:05
Subject:You say you are lying. But if ...
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You say you are lying.  But if everything you say is a lie, then you
are telling the truth.  You cannot tell the truth because everything
you say is a lie.  You lie, you tell the truth ... but you cannot, for
you lie.
                -- Norman the android, "I, Mudd", stardate 4513.3




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Date:2007-04-27 05:11
Subject:You're dead, Jim. ...
Security:Public

You're dead, Jim.
                -- McCoy, "Amok Time", stardate 3372.7




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Date:2007-04-26 19:10
Subject:Wait ... is this a FUN THING or ...
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Wait ... is this a FUN THING or the END of LIFE in Petticoat
Junction??




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Date:2007-04-26 13:05
Subject:... The things love can drive a ...
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... The things love can drive a man to -- the ecstasies, the
the miseries, the broken rules, the desperate chances, the glorious
failures and the glorious victories.
                -- McCoy, "Requiem for Methuselah", stardate 5843.7




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Date:2007-04-26 09:19
Subject:If I traveled to the end of the ...
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If I traveled to the end of the rainbow
As Dame Fortune did intend,
Murphy would be there to tell me
The pot's at the other end.
                -- Bert Whitney




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Date:2007-04-26 03:17
Subject:War is never imperative. ...
Security:Public

War is never imperative.
                -- McCoy, "Balance of Terror", stardate 1709.2




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Date:2007-04-25 23:08
Subject:Extract from Official Sweepstakes ...
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Extract from Official Sweepstakes Rules:

                NO PURCHASE REQUIRED TO CLAIM YOUR PRIZE

To claim your prize without purchase, do the following: (a) Carefully
cut out your computer-printed name and address from upper right hand
corner of the Prize Claim Form. (b) Affix computer-printed name and
address -- with glue or cellophane tape (no staples or paper clips) --
to a 3x5 inch index card.  (c) Also cut out the "No" paragraph (lower
left hand corner of Prize Claim Form) and affix it to the 3x5 card
below your address label. (d) Then print on your 3x5 card, above your
computer-printed name and address the words "CARTER

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Date:2007-04-25 15:09
Subject:"A programmer is a person who passes ...
Security:Public

"A programmer is a person who passes as an exacting expert on the basis
of being able to turn out, after innumerable punching, an infinite
series of incomprehensive answers calculated with micrometric
precisions from vague assumptions based on debatable figures taken from
inconclusive documents and carried out on instruments of problematical
accuracy by persons of dubious reliability and questionable mentality
for the avowed purpose of annoying and confounding a hopelessly
defenseless department that was unfortunate enough to ask for the
information in the first place."
                -- IEEE Grid news magazine



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Date:2007-04-25 11:13
Subject:You'll learn something about men ...
Security:Public

You'll learn something about men and women -- the way they're supposed
to be.  Caring for each other, being happy with each other, being good
to each other.  That's what we call love.  You'll like that a lot.
                -- Kirk, "The Apple", stardate 3715.6




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Date:2007-04-25 01:07
Subject:One does not thank logic. ...
Security:Public

One does not thank logic.
                -- Sarek, "Journey to Babel", stardate 3842.4




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Date:2007-04-24 21:03
Subject:Do you know the one -- "All I ask ...
Security:Public

Do you know the one -- "All I ask is a tall ship, and a star to steer
her by ..."  You could feel the wind at your back, about you ...  the
sounds of the sea beneath you.  And even if you take away the wind and
the water, it's still the same.  The ship is yours ... you can feel her
... and the stars are still there.
                -- Kirk, "The Ultimate Computer", stardate 4729.4




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Date:2007-04-24 11:01
Subject: Thompson, if he is to be ...
Security:Public

        Thompson, if he is to be believed, has sampled the entire
rainbow of legal and illegal drugs in heroic efforts to feel better
than he does.
        As for the truth about his health: I have asked around about
it.  I am told that he appears to be strong and rosy, and steadily
sane.  But we will be doing what he wants us to do, I think, if we
consider his exterior a sort of Dorian Gray facade.  Inwardly, he is
being eaten alive by tinhorn politicians.
        The disease is fatal.  There is no known cure.  The most we can
do for the poor devil, it seems to me, is to name his disease in his
honor.  From this moment on, let all those who feel that Americans can
be as easily led to beauty as to ugliness, to truth as to public
relations, to joy as to bitterness, be said to be suffering from Hunter
Thompson's disease.  I don't have it this morning.  It comes and goes.
This morning I don't have Hunter Thompson's disease.
                -- Kurt Vonnegut Jr. on Dr. Hunter S. Thompson: Excerpt
                   from "A Political Disease", Vonnegut's review of "Fear
                   and Loathing: On the Campaign Trail '72"


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Date:2007-04-24 05:08
Subject:Place me on a BUFFER counter while ...
Security:Public

Place me on a BUFFER counter while you BELITTLE several BELLHOPS in the
Trianon Room!!  Let me one of your SUBSIDIARIES!




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Date:2007-04-24 03:14
Subject:You say you are lying. But if ...
Security:Public

You say you are lying.  But if everything you say is a lie, then you
are telling the truth.  You cannot tell the truth because everything
you say is a lie.  You lie, you tell the truth ... but you cannot, for
you lie.
                -- Norman the android, "I, Mudd", stardate 4513.3




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Date:2007-04-23 21:11
Subject:BARRY ... That was the most HEART-WARMING ...
Security:Public

BARRY ... That was the most HEART-WARMING rendition of "I DID IT MY
WAY" I've ever heard!!




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