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Blurty for Kim salo.
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| Tuesday, February 24th, 2004 |
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| soo not feeling good...my whole body is cold(i have gloves on), my joints hurt, and im nausious(sp?). Man, yesterday was a gr8 day(as in comparison to today).Too much to list, but i like a 16 yr old kid from my bus. his name is Brian, and last night...last night, we had a nice dirty talk session. Yummmy! he calles me sexy, "the hot girl", and is quite intriguing. well, i g2g now. Hopefully ill feel better, and we could talk more later. |
| Thursday, January 8th, 2004 |
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| Today was a very boring day....This morning Ej was talkin about how his sister had received expensive earrings from her "Boyfriend", and how she was using him because she wasnt talking to him. Believe me, i could feel tension building up as soon as he said "It's not right how he gives her such an expensive gift and she ignores him...". You see, that's basically what happened between us. later, I twisted up my ankle in gym trying to hit the volleyball, and thats the most interesting thing that's happened. It's all numb, except for a dull pain every time i step. OUCH! Man, i feel my devotion to god slipping away. Man, this really isnt cool, I dont want to be the same as i did before!! |
| Wednesday, December 31st, 2003 |
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| well, im finally back....from the 27th to the 30th i went to a church trip called the advance. It was really awesome...pastor matt is a really inspirational speaker, and he got me to change my mind about some stuff in my life, like guys(stop thinking i need a b/f), cursing, and "living life as a lie"(acting different in church than in school). I think i just need to realize (with the guy thing) that god is in control of my life and he has the perfect guy planned out for me, and that he will come in time. I also realized that jesus needs to be more than just a section of a box (the box is a metaphor for life and the different sections are *for example* guys, god, friends, family, school, politics) and that he should be the regulating factor in my life. Well, im sure for you non x-tians out there i am boring you..so lemme talk about a kid i have a crush on at my church. He's...in seventh grade, has black curly hair(it's short), chinese kind of eyes, olive skin, and wears(from what i've seen) mostly punky stuff like sweaters, really low bagged jeans, and vans. I dunno what else to say, my sister on the ride home yesterday ran up to him and said "kim says hi" and everyone started OOOOHH!ing. Thne like ten secs later a kid sitting with him said "Austin says hi!" and kiersten said he was lookin at me. In fact, almost every time i turned to look at him he was looking at me.. I actually have no idea if that's a good or bad thing, but i was freaking out. well, hopefully ill come back sooner than last time. |
| Monday, December 8th, 2003 |
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| Not feeling good peoples.....Im all achey(is that a word?) and cold and coughing-y...good thing is i missed a science test*mwaah ha ha haaaa!* and i...i...i..didnt see...*sniffle*...alex... Rough times, im tellin you. ohh, if i didnt tell u before, here it is...Rob is a totally gay! Well, bisexual, but the point is he likes men! I heard*from him* that he had an enormous crush on alex last year too. Unless he's lying or there was some1 else on his screen name...I mean, why the hell would he tell me?? i only met him face to face once, and all we said we "hi". Anyways, as i see it, that's just freaky shit. yeah baby yeah!! Also, on friday....Alex called me back after i left him a message. YES! |
| Wednesday, December 3rd, 2003 |
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| today was not a good day. One thing.. never read a book while sitting sideways on the bus. Retch! yesterday a new guy of mine(alex) was talkin to me alot. I wont go into the hairy details...but all i will say is that at the end of the period he said to me"tell me if this tickles" and then squeezed my knee. I said"no..?" and he moved his hand up a bit and did it again. Baby...that was anything but a tickle! And then yesterday mr obvious(Tom) gave me a rough time after i told him i digged him(well, i said "i like you", but that could mean anything). And Jason(yet another guy) came back after being absent all week and..and.. Arghhh! it's so crazy right now...my love life that is. Those kids on the bus gave up on the porn star thing...Doug amuses himself looking at me breathe. |
| Monday, December 1st, 2003 |
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| Todat is a verrry good day 4 some reason. Today, i noticed that alf spits when he talks. Gross me out X 1000. Today Tom(guy i like) came up to me and was doing something weird, making a whooshing sound and pointing at me..then he did the noise again, and rustled my hair. Like, all fingers in the hair. Oh yea! Then in math Alex(another guy) was telling me how he almost broke a machine while bowling. how the lights went out and the owner was all pissed. All smiles! just now tom agreed to my my "virtual b/f". ohh yummy! |
| Friday, November 28th, 2003 |
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| i g2g get my flu shot today...total nail biter!!! *squirm in seat*and then later im going to my aunt's house probably and catch up with gossip with my cousin..bbml |
| Thursday, November 27th, 2003 |
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| it is thanksgiving today baby!! my world's been rather twisted up in the past week. I think im set free of Alf's spell(or for now at least). It seems like whenever he gets the chance, he likes to tell me how long he thinks he and his girl are going to last. Quite frankly, i want to tell him i dont give a fuck..and it feels like a nice kick in the stomach every time he says it. Like i lose hope every morning. Well, yesterday morning he didnt say it, but then again we have been on and off about whats between us at the moment. Anywayz, there is a new guy(new in my mind, from the other school) that sits behind me in math who i think im into. then there are two kids on the bus(named doug and brian, sophmores) who say i look like a porn star. doug said it first(kinda ugly kid) and then yesterday Brian(betta lookin) said it too. I asked,"is that a bad thing", and Brian's eyes got a rounder look to them and he said"nooo, that's very good!". hmm, makes ya wonder... |
| Monday, November 24th, 2003 |
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| This is like the 3rd frigging day in a row that Alf and the girl have visited each other's house. Grr, this rele is not a good lifetime*reality sets in* No, but relle, he wasn't even on the bus this morning either. And then later in the hallway I saw him and her together, and he didnt say hi to me.. Meanwhile, he might not even had seen me in the first place.*that says an awful lot about what's going on* Actually, i think my eyes are starting to open up to new things. *to new guys I should say*. but who knows..maybe in this next few weeks he'll change his mind about me. |
| Saturday, November 22nd, 2003 |
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My code for dialogue ~=me {=him I feel... grr, i dont even know how i feel. About Tuesday of this week, Alf figured out how i feel about him. I, uh, actually made it quite obvious. I said to him,~"If, or when you and(his girlfriend) do break up, dont ask anyone else out, okay?" {"Okay...Why, are you going to ask me out?' ~"*scoff* Yes!" {*has his head down again, and then looks at me* "So, you like me again?" ~"well, i cant tell you that, you have a girlfriend!! But then again.. that did sound quite obvious" {"yea" ~"so do you think you could ever like me again?" {*gives me this long look that says'you know i cant answer that'* "i can't tell you right now" {you know, me and(his g/f) may be going out for a while..." ~"yea.."*that's what you think* And then yesterday on the bus Alf and I were discussing another guy and his(alf's) Ex. I asked him, ~"well, i think you only liked her for her looks, right?" and he said yes. Then I asked ~"well, what reasons did u like me for?" and he said {"well, you're pretty, and I like your personality". Actually, i kinda ment that as a past tense!! And then later, after school, he comes on the bus, and she's with him...So I sit with the guy we were talking about before, and I was treated to a half an hour of watching Peter poke her and make comments like"So, you guys are ONLY going to his house to play monopoly and chinese checkers right?". and Alf was givin him the finger every 5 minutes and swiping at him. And i loved it! After that, it was different.. I was on the phone a little while after talking to my friend Amanda about how obsessed I was, when the door bell rang*dom dom dah!* And I said to her,"ill bet that's them..". *door swings open* And there they were. Him on rollerblades, and her just..there. They had to leave though, so I had amanda come over. Then we decided to bother the two love birds..and stopped by. well, we watched the matrix..and on the couch it was(from right to left)!Amanda! !Me! !Alf! and !the other girl!. lol. So basically he was in between. and out knees and elbows were touching. ooooh! Then they started to touch hands and rest on eachother's shoulders, and guess what? Every time i looked at them doing it, he would pull his hand away. It was a very spazztic evening. And there is one think i didnt mention to you..Alf's mom is divorced, and another woman lives there. One hint to the situation is they share a bed. And the non-mom one is a bitch, and protects the other like you would not believe. "excuse me!!! You mother was fuckin talking to you! answer her!". ughh. well, I think that woman is like in love with is g/f. like, always playfully teasing her"did you vacuum the carpet young lady? you missed a spot" and "come here and make me some coffee!!" how about mentioning "im going to give you a house key, and you can come and stay here!". Yeah baby yeah!!! she doesnt like me at all for some reason. and im glad too. then before we left, Alf's "real" mom said "walk then out (alf).." and we stood there really awkwardly when we said bye. it ended in 3 high fives(hey, i was only trying to out last amanda). then we biked home with me on the seat and her pedaling(aka me screaming we were going to fall the whole ride). then I was depressed all night. My mom said I put myself through torture, and i have to let him go. and I cant, i cant! then she left, and I cried for the next ten minutes.. |
| Saturday, November 15th, 2003 |
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| Hey...i just met this totally cute guy named Rob. I'm telling you, he was all nice on Aim, and then he sent me two pics. If i could, i would show them to you. The cool thing is, he's in my school and the same grade too! to bad, he says he has a g/f in another school. I shall keep a lookout! Everyone just came home from washington last night. Alf's g/f is telling me how he bought her a Curious george magnet, and for some reason..i couldnt care less! I think he's starting to act all weird tho. He never is able to come over(just to hang out, you know?) when i invite him to my house. quite frankly, i think he's just too damned devoted. she's going to dump his ass, and he is going to get freaky on us all. Grr, i am feeling sick right now. sore throat and a cold.... |
| Tuesday, November 11th, 2003 |
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| grr, tomorrow all my friends are going to Washington DC. that is, except me...i guess it's because of 9/11 and all that. And Alf and his girl are going too. I heard from an old friend of his g/f that he predicts they're only going to last for about a month. I certainly hope so. I asked him to the mall today, and he said he was uncomfortable about going without her, so he asked if she could come too. bullshit, i'd skip going to the mall rather than have first hand experiance of them hanging all over eachother. sorry, just a lil pissy. he's not going to be on the bus for the friggin rest of the week. |
| Saturday, November 8th, 2003 |
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Im verrrry bored today, and my back hurts. Let's take the opportunity to tell a little story(little my a$$) about me and Alf's history.....Once apon a time in eighth grade I had a crush on a guy..My best friend Alfie(not to be confused with alf) had just gotten herself a boyfriend, and, well, you know how it goes, wanting to be just like her..So the day right after he asked her out, i decided to do the same, and i asked out "big ass". I barely knew him, and he predictably said no.(that is again another entry in itself about y i though he liked me). I was soo crushed, to make a long story short. Then approximately a week later, we had our seats changed for science. Now, i had seen this kid Alf for a while, and my friends and I had been giggling over his last name for about the past 2 weeks. My luck, he had to sit next to me...well, that day he asked me for help on a graph, and my torn heart fell for him immediantly. We got to know each other better every day, until one day i asked if we could "go out" to a movie *in my mind it was more than a casual friends meet*. It was all good, sharing drinks and such. Then at night, we dropped off my friend Alfie and prepared to take him home. My mom unfortunately stopped by a pharmacy to get some milk, and i was in the car alone with him. Well, we didn't do anything*i know, yea rite*. It was silent, and I brought up the issue on my mind. "Listen, i heard my friends, and your sister and everyone else say that you like me...Do you?" "Yea, I like you" "Well, i like you too." I remember the scenery so well. The car was dark, the windows fogged up, and it was Friday the 13th in November. The florescent lights of the gas station illuminated his profile, and his head was down. My heart was singing that evening. All smiles, but we parted saying only "bye, c'ya Monday"(i really regret not making a move). Then, that evening, something went wrong. I suddenly became scared. Too relied on, like i was responsible for a life. Like someone liking you in that way was too valuable for me to handle. Too big. And the fun of the situation became fear. I mean, i held my composure for a week, but it was suddenly too much.*just think, this was in 8th grade*. and i backed off. And he became confused. He bought me a christmas present($25 gift certificate). and it got worse. basically a mess of emotions. 8 months later, in June, we started to talk again. We got close, and it started all over again...but this time he had a g/f(not his current 1), and he said he didnt like me.*when in reality, he did, but he didnt feel it was right to like some 1 else*. we didnt talk 4 two days, and his mom and mine got into a little fight. Didnt last that long, honestly. He broke up with that girl, and asked me out about a month later(i liked another guy alot tho), and I said no. Now, he has his current g/f, and i like him again, and now this feeling is for real. Now that i realized(from my good friend, his g/f) that he can kiss and all that, it's back. God help me... |
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| It is tooo early for me! Damn, 7:50am. Last night i had a dream about Alf. I thing it was about him being over my house(he lives right up the road from me) really early(i was still in my pj's). We were hanging out in my basement, and I confessed that I liked him. He was still going out with his g/f at the time, and he said we could go out secretly. Then i went upstairs to change, and went all frantic to brush my teeth. im not rele sure if we kissed right afterwards, but at one point we did. And it was perfect. And now i feel horrible because i know it didn't actually happen. I've decided, friendship or not, I will be the next girl to be his g/f. well, my history with him is another entry within itself.... |
| Friday, November 7th, 2003 |
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| I just found this site...and 10 minutes ago I "dirrty talked" with a hot guy from my spanish class(let's call him Mr Obvious). Well, at least I think he's hot. Today my ex(well, not exactly) had his new G/f come on the bus, and let's just say I felt deperessed!(let's call this one Alf) I think it's just a jealousy issue. Well, like this Tuesday i realized I liked him again(after i got rejected by a third guy*call this 1 Almonds*) and it's not very favorable to my situation that he's going out with a verry good friend of mine. Well, he like always askes me who I like(cough cough), and just being very sweet and obvious. |
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Blurty for Kim salo.
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sick.
weird.
melancholy.
bitchy.
happy.
scared.
hungry.
thoughtful.
frustrated.
tired.
restless.