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[23 Feb 2008|05:23am] |
The Panic attacks have started again.
It's 5:30 in the morning, the sun has started to come up, and I can't sleep, because everytime i lay down, I start to think, and then i can't breathe.
I'm not ok.
I keep being tempted to call tim.
I really wish he had stayed the night.
But I can't, he is asleep.
I just want to hear his voice, hear him talk, have him distract me.
Just something so I can get a couple hours sleep.
even now, the panic is there just under the surface.
I feel like any moment, I am going to drown.
I think I am breaking.
I really really don't like this descision looming over my head.
During the day I'm ok.
I can't take this.
I wish someone would help.
I keep asking for advice. But no one seems to want to give it
All i get is, 'do what you want', or 'I don't want to stop you.'
If i knew what i wanted i'd be ok.
I don't want someone to make the desicsion for me,
I just need help figuring out what the best descision is.
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