Jackie Lombard's Blurty Entries [entries|friends|calendar] Jackie Lombard [ userinfo | blurty userinfo ] [ calendar | blurty calendar ]

It's so uncool and old that it's off the map, it's retro...it'll be cool again in 20 yrs. [10 Apr 2009|01:25am] [ mood | bitchy ] [ music | Bayside ] blah blah blah this hasn't been touched in a very long time. It's almost like uncovering a lost souls words. 1 comment|post comment

stuff... [28 Jul 2006|04:30am] [ mood | sick ] why does it have to be me who has nothing but bloody violent horrifying fucking nightmares and night terrors all the fucking time? why? i cant deal with it, i cant fucking deal with it, and im fucking afraid to sleep at night, i'm petrified of the dark, and even my own shadow....its 4:33 AM, it raining and i have to go to work. its pitch black outside and i swear i hear footsteps outside my door, i can't leave my room....im terrified. i hate this someone is out there. please, someone, make it go away 1 comment|post comment

stuff.... [07 Jul 2006|07:35pm] I guess I'm trying to say I'm sorry, But it always comes out wrong, I think a part of you still loves me, Even though we're moving on. Always, all ways I wanted us to be, Always, all ways you and me, And I wait here on my own, And I wait for you to see, All the time I spend alone now won't comfort me, Always all ways... And I'm sorry for what happened, But I want you there to see, That I'm changing all my actions, I don't wanna set you free. Always, all ways I want to see you through Always, all ways me and you And I wait here on my own, And I wait for you to see, All the time I spend alone now won't comfort me. 'Cause I'm waiting for you, Yeah, I'm waiting for you, Give me answers, get me through, I will wait... Always, all ways I wanted us to be, Always, all ways you and me, And I wait here on my own, And I wait for you to see, All the time I spend alone now won't comfort me. 'Cause I'm waiting for you, And I'll wait here for you, Give me answers, give me through, I will wait... 'Cause I'm waiting for you, Yeah I'm waiting for you, Give me answers, get me through, I will wait... Always, all ways post comment

stuff... [07 Jul 2006|05:56pm] [ mood | crushed ] [ music | Lost Prophets ] maybe you can ignore me forever, but you can't ignore the thought of me for long. Once something is in your blood, it's in your blood and I'll be there until your gone. So, go ahead and reject my calls, don't write back, no response, turn your cheek the other way...but I know you can't forget that there chemicals between us. post comment

stuff... [06 Jul 2006|04:38pm] [ mood | cold ] [ music | Lost Prophets ] It hurts because it wasn't because I didn't love him anymore. I did love him. I do love him. And thats why I let him go. Cos I saw him drowning in love with me, and nothing else in his life was going anywhere, so I cut him free because other wise I would've dragged him down. He needed to be on his own to get it together cos I couldn't do it for him. And now he writes about fate...and his new love...and damn...it burns. post comment

stuff.... [13 Mar 2006|03:09am] [ mood | aggravated ] [ music | Taking Back Sunday ] Alright. Here we go. At least I know who I am. You can't waste your life wishing other people knew you are alive. Cos when the acknowledge you, you won't know how to act. At least I give people a chance. I try so fucking hard to give you want you want. To try to make you feel at home. To try to make you happy. To try to understand, and listen when I don't. But everyone has a breaking point. I hear you out. I give you suggestions. But when it comes right down to it, don't listen to me. Listen to yourself. Cos I can't help you find what is inside. Sometimes I just want to scream out "get a life". Finally, I'll admit the truth. I just wanted this to work out. You're unique, but you are not abstract. You get under my skin when you make accusations. You generalize things and yea, it bothers me okay? But I tried to shove those things aside, cos I wanted to help you if I could. Or at least be there if you fell. But I feel like you don't want to be understood, so you change yourself, and you change your mind. I don't think you put yourself out there enough, but maybe I throw myself to far in. Maybe we just don't know eachother hardly at all. When there are things in your life that are hard you get upset that they exisist at all. How can you say that you just want to fit in somewhere when you are not accepting or accomadating to life? I just didn't want to ruin your day, but it turned out that way anyway. I'm sorry this happend, but not sorry enough to take it back. I'm just living day to day. No regrets. None at all. post comment

stuff.... [14 Feb 2006|02:42am] i've come to the top of the circle, and soon I'll quickly curve to the bottom, to a place that very much resembles hell. it's like i draw this pattern over and over, and somehow it gets erased behind me, leaving me no tracks to let me know i've been going in circles all my life. and here i am, i know it looks bad but it gets worse. don't feel so sad when i'm coming home, coming home in a herse. cos this moment is simply me relizing that i can't escape it. i can't deny it, i'm a slave to its bidding, and i sold my soul to keep it this way. such a sad story, but it's never that bad. they say you can make your own destiny, well they also say you can dig your own grave, so here i am with a shovel and a rolled twenty. post comment

stuff... [14 Feb 2006|12:20am] even if I don't believe, doesn't mean it's not gonna work, so pray for my souls sake. Keep it coming night and day, cos tonight i'm gonna need help. post comment

stuff... [18 Jan 2006|03:50am] [ mood | sad ] [ music | garden state soundtrack ] if i were to wish that it would stop raining, and in turn my wish came true, then spring would never come. same goes for pain. if i were to stand out in the rain and let it saturate me completely, from that point on i would know that you can only get so wet, you can only hurt so much before you know that life springs from pain. post comment

stuff.... [07 Dec 2005|04:14am] [ mood | nauseated ] [ music | gorillaz ] a cut above the rest. take it as it's ment. post comment

stuff... [06 Dec 2005|11:55pm] [ mood | calm ] [ music | Bear vs. Shark ] If I had a mind of my own, would I be able to think straight? If I didn't listen to everyone, could I make a choice? Am I really standing still if the world still rotates? post comment

stuff... [18 Nov 2005|05:01am] [ mood | cold ] [ music | Thievory Corporation ] What if I could just disapear. Into the world I would fly. I hate wherever it is I'm standing. My legs are tired, but I gotta keep running. I want to go out where the trees are still old, grew themselves and where mothernature was the landscaper. I want to sink into the concrete of streets with a million different people I've never seen before. Anywhere but wherever I am sounds good to me. I gotta go, Can't stay. Not here, not now, not with you or for anything. Take it all, donate it, burn it, sell it for more than it's worth. Cos I can't put a value on any of lifes jokes anymore. As for relationship and love. Well I don't know is selflessness was such a good idea. Don't want to be resentful or resented. Just want to be. A wanderer. A dreamer. A memory. If I could go anywhere, I'd be swallowed up by the sky, demolished into billions of particles and rain down all over the earth. post comment

stuff... [01 Nov 2005|02:39am] [ mood | sad ] [ music | Buffy Soundtrack: ONE MORE TIME WITH FEELING ] im peeling off the petals from a flower you once gave me trying to decide if what im doing here is actually satisfying ill wake up in a few hours risin with the sun ill have come to no conclusion of where to i can run i wish i could stay but oh how i want to go live a life so simple or a life less so guide me please in one direction i don't care where it is i go just don't make me make this decision all up on my own cos i'm lost without you near im peeling off the petals from a flower you once gave me trying to decide if what im doing here is actually satisfying post comment

stuff... [05 Oct 2005|01:13am] [ mood | contemplative ] [ music | stabbing westward ] Josh Gracin Brass Bed Baby, the clock on the wall is lying It's not really that late It's too cold outside to be walking around the streets of this town Anywhere if you think you have to be can wait Why don't you stay with me Share all your secrets tonight We can make believe the morning sun never will rise Come and lay your head on this big brass bed And we'll be alright as long as you stay with me, yeah Baby, there is just no use in hiding The way that I am feeling right now With you standing there baby I swear I can't help but stare Girl you're wearing me out, wearing me out Baby, stay with me share all your secrets tonight We can make believe the morning sun never will rise Come and lay your head on this big brass bed We'll be alright as long as you stay with me Baby, don't go it looks like it's starting to rain And it's so warm here in this apartment wrapped up in this blanket So stay Stay with me Share all your secrets tonight We can make believe the morning sun never will rise Come and lay your head on this big brass bed And we'll be alright as long as you stay I'll be alright as long as you stay with me, yeah Stay with me post comment

stuff... [02 Oct 2005|08:21pm] [ mood | chipper ] [ music | my heart pounding ] Artist: Chantal Kreviazuk Lyrics Song: Feels Like Home Lyrics Somethin' in your eyes, makes me wanna lose myself Makes me wanna lose myself, in your arms There's somethin' in your voice, makes my heart beat fast Hope this feeling lasts, the rest of my life If you knew how lonely my life has been And how long I've been so alone And if you knew how I wanted someone to come along And change my life the way you've done It feels like home to me, it feels like home to me It feels like I'm all the way back where I come from It feels like home to me, it feels like home to me It feels like I'm all the way back where I belong A window breaks, down a long, dark street And a siren wails in the night But I'm alright, 'cause I have you here with me And I can almost see, through the dark there is light Well, if you knew how much this moment means to me And how long I've waited for your touch And if you knew how happy you are making me I never thought that I'd love anyone so much It feels like home to me, it feels like home to me It feels like I'm all the way the back where I come from It feels like home to me, it feels like home to me It feels like I'm all the way back where I belong It feels like I'm all the way back where I belong post comment

stuff... [18 Sep 2005|08:18pm] [ mood | sad ] [ music | hawthorne heights ] HAWTHRONE HEIGHTS blue burns orange Bleed these colors open wide Burning blues from butterflies (Tonight we, Tonight we fly) Flying faster through the night Until the orange of morning light (Dear black goodbye, DEAR BLACK GOODBYE) I know it's hard to make this work When you're all alone (ALONE) And I've been waiting for so long To hold you in my arms Embrace forever my sweet girl Water fills these open eyes (TONIGHT WE FLY) Still frames and valentines Won't keep me in her mind (DEAR BLACK GOODBYE, Dear black goodbye) I know it's hard to make this work When you're all alone (ALONE) And I've been waiting for so long To hold you in my arms Embrace forever my sweet girl [x2] You are the ghost of everything that I'm not and I want to be [x2] Dear black goodbye (GOODBYE) Don't forget to write Your name (GOODBYE) inside of my life And I know it's hard to make this work When you're all alone I've been waiting for so long To hold you in my arms And I've been waiting for so long To hold you in my arms Embrace forever my sweet girl 1 comment|post comment

stuff... [18 Sep 2005|07:57pm] [ mood | sick ] [ music | hawthorne heights ] HAWTHORNE HEIGHTS Silver Bullet Tonight, we fly away so high. Our first full moon sky. I'll breathe you in, I won't let you down, I won't hold you back, I won't make a sound. I know what scares you the most. Being Alone, Just like them, Being Alive, Feeling so... DEAD. at least you’ll have my... HEART. You know you shine so bright. Got a single Silver Bullet, Shot right through my heart. To prove I cant survive, Without you. Got a single Silver Bullet, Shot right through my heart. To prove I cant survive, Without you. Can you sleep at night, If I hold you tight. I won't let you go, This feels so right. Please don't leave this... TIME. At least you’ll have my... HEART. You know you shine so... bright. Got a single Silver Bullet, Shot right through my heart. To prove I cant survive, Without you. Got a single Silver Bullet, Shot right through my heart. To prove I cant survive, Without you. Tonight, we fly away so high, Tonight, We fly away. You know the moon is full and, and I can't live without you. Tonight we'll fly away (Got a single silver bullet) Tonight we'll fly (Got a Single Silver Bullet) Got a single Silver Bullet, Shot right through my heart. To prove I cant survive, Without you. Got a single Silver Bullet, Shot right through my heart. To prove I cant survive. Got a single Silver Bullet, Shot right through my heart. To prove I cant survive, Without you. Got a single Silver Bullet, Shot right through my heart. To prove I cant survive, Without you. post comment

stuff... [18 Sep 2005|07:06pm] [ mood | crushed ] [ music | hawthorne heights ] i can never win no matter how many times i hit the undo button and i cant make this work i was jaded from the start so let me fail so let me fail cos there isn't anything worth saying is okay when simply, nothing is i found what it was that i needed and then i found out i cant have it so tell me, whats a girl to do in this day in age when love is frowned upon and tell me how i'm suppose to breathe when the world is holding me underwater, there isn't anything worth saying is okay when simply, nothing is post comment

stuff... [12 Sep 2005|02:23am] [ mood | cold ] [ music | cold ] I just wrote this... Kinda about what i feel... In the day, in the light, I can see my way through In the damp, in the dark I only think of you When it's warm and bright I think I can conquor When it's cold and night The fear is much stronger I sleep so lightly that you could say I don't sleep at all and my brain is delayed... overwhelmed and I just can't think straight until the day breaks...until the day breaks Here people aren't who they're suppose to be They're simply shells of who they think we wanna see But we choose our friends blindly as we hide behind our own masks everyone is searching for a way to escape their past I sleep so lightly that you could say I don't sleep at all and my brain is delayed... overwhelmed and I just can't think straight until the day breaks...until the day breaks So here I find myself sitting behind this screen desprate for a way to show them the real me But what if they question it, what if they see... I'm simply like them with all my own insecurities Does that make me less unique, does it take away my gentility? I sleep so lightly that you could say I don't sleep at all and my brain is delayed... overwhelmed and I just can't think straight until the day breaks...until the day breaks And what if they see, what if they see, and what if they see the true me? 1 comment|post comment

stuff... [12 Sep 2005|02:21am] [ mood | frustrated ] [ music | BOXcarRacer ] Sometimes I wish I was smart I wish I made cures for How people are I wish I had power I wish I could lead I wish I could change the world For you and me post comment

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