Blurty for donna geronimo.
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| Monday, June 9th, 2003 |
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someday, my prince will come until then, we will gyrate and sweat and hold each other too close to move. i will not touch you there, or there, or there, and we will use different words for the same anatomy. then i will cook dinner, wondering if it is you, me, or us -- if, in changing, we have grown so far apart all we can do is touch hands. someday, my prince will come; until then, we will tense and roll away, bodies marked off into parts: yes, no, ye-no, please, no. this is the language of sex when the body is something to reinvent: not there, not there, not there. i will leave later, wondering when we decided i walk myself home close my own door and, bed empty, shut my eyes. |
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| Tuesday, April 15th, 2003 |
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when my mom would get angry she would throw plates and dishes and if she didn't get her way she told us she was dying. we split up jewelery on the bed while she wheezed and grew quiet and then i would take my little sister to the babysitter's until she stopped dying and called to have us come home. later, when she had her strength back, maybe she'd make dinner. maybe i would. maybe we'd wait until my dad got home and go out to denny's for dinner. i wasn't an abused kid growing up; i was just another little girl who learned too early that the world wasn't very nice. i used to wish my mother was a secret alcoholic so she would have an excuse. i could come home from school and smell on her breath who would have to be mommy. there would be signs and always a hope of a life without alcohol; there could be (someday) alcoholic's anonymous, support in the form of other adults, apologies and new beginnings. instead there were angels and aura readings and long nights of screaming: my mother and i, my mother and my father, my mother and the telephone. no way out, no excuses, just volume. (more to come.) |
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| Wednesday, April 2nd, 2003 |
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| ( click for the dirty business ) | ||||
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| Saturday, March 22nd, 2003 |
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| ( someday, my prince will come ) | ||||
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| Wednesday, February 26th, 2003 |
| Monday, February 10th, 2003 |
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( exit ) things that bug me: rhythm. |
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| Saturday, February 8th, 2003 |
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( Untitled ) things I don't know: how to bring it together; it doesn't feel done but I don't know how to make it finished up. i don't know what it needs yet. thoughts? what works? what doesn't? what do you want to know more about? |
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this journal is ugly b/c it is for writing, not looking good. it is also for writing, so all y'all who don't want to read my writing, go look at my livejournal |
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Blurty for donna geronimo.
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