07:09am 09/01/2004
mood: drained
music: Numb - Linkin Park
Why am I awake? Because the house is empty. Everyone's gone. I don't know where they've gone too, and I don't particularly care. I haven't been able to sleep lately either.
I'll go 3-4 days with no sleep then crash for 5-6 hours. My love of sugar and caffeine has only grown. The longer I stay awake the longer I can avoid nightmares.

It feels wrong when no one's here...I like being alone, yes, but I also like hearing the reassuring sound of voices that don't originate in my own mind.

My kingdom for an hour of peaceful rest...
Forget December...   
09:32am 25/10/2003
mood: artistic
music: Fall - Something Corporate
Through the haze
After the maze
I found you waiting there

Beside the dark medow
I fell into shadow
But you were waiting there

Now I sink to dreams and then
I hope that again
You will be waiting there

Meh. It sucks, but...yeah.

She stood beside the ocean
Staring at the sun
He couldn't see from where he was
But knew her life was done

The flames in her dark eyes now dead
Crimson tears that fall like rain
The only one who could save her now
Was apathetic to her pain

As she drew her last breath in, she cried
And turned her face up towards the sky
She did the only thing she could
When she closed her eyes and died

That was just...unintentional..I swear.
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Another sentimental argument and bitter love...   
06:02am 10/10/2003
mood: awake
music: Suffocate - GreenDay
*cough* Yeah, the title doesn't mean anything. It's just from the song I'm listenin to right now. Mary likes this song..'Tis by Greenday. Yes...I'm hungry. Anyway, Chris, I'll call you tomorrow night if you want, just to tell you where I am and give you the number, though why you'd want it is beyond me. I dunno what I'll say..but I'll call..Hehe, I could just let Mary talk to you and you'd never know the difference. I'm just kinda...awaiting sleep again. Staring at the ceiling isn't effective. I should just go take a shower and hope the warmth lulls me.
Thunder chasin' the wind...   
01:26am 29/07/2002
mood: distressed
music: Iris - Goo Goo Dolls
I'm so numb. It scares me. Something's wrong with me, but I couldn't tell you what..I had this wierd dream.

I was laying in bed. It wasn't my bed, cause it was a water bed...the room was dark, and someone was with me. His arm was around my waist, kinda like a spoons position. I felt really happy...he whispered good morning to me, and I replied, "So...what did you dream about?" His answer was, "I dreamed you were with me. I dreamed we were beside the ocean." and he kissed me, and I woke up. But all day those words stuck with me.