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[29 Nov 2004|01:27pm]
[ mood | lonely ]

So in the new year I've decided to take driving lessons, I have a nice bit of money saved up for a car now & Dad has offered to help with lesson, license, insurance & tax costs!

Me & Mum are going to sign up for a digital photography in January with a lady called Sue whos grandkids I previously babysat for.

Work is going well although I had a very big arguement with the provisions manager Dave, which resulted in him right in my face his teeth gritted, thought he was going to hit me. He only started on me because I was talking to someone while doing my work, he must be jealous of the interaction I have with other people. He came up with completely illogical instructions & then proceeded to explain them rather shit. So I stood up for myself & questioned what the point in doing it that way was exactly. I explained that we were getting the work done twice as fast the way we were doing it anyway. Then he just said, "No you weren't" I said, "Whatever", & carried on with my work. He then proceeded to tell me off like I was a school kid, so I did as he had so poorly instructed me to, & he walked off. Then when he left I stood there seeing no sense in what he had abruptly told us to do, so I carried on putting stock out while watching to makesure he wasn't around. He caught me & decided to have a go at me again. I threw the stock down & he then proceeded to explain it to me in a different way, telling me things he hadn't the first time round, I just said, "Well Dave if you had just explained it to me clearer the first time". He really pisses me off, I was getting my work done & he's just completely power mad. If he pisses me off again I'm just going to ask him to stay out of my way. He isn't even my manager, Mike is, if he doesn't stay out of my way I'm going to complain about him.

Not really looking forward to Christmas this year, I hate Christmas shopping & I still don't know what my Mum & Dad want, don't know what to get my Grandad, might get a little something for my Aunt Diane & cousins this year, my Aunt Diane is really depressed atm & she's also going through some "women's problems" that's all I've been told on the subject so far. All I know is that she's been having tests at the hospital.

I won't be getting anything for Christmas this year, because my Christmas present has been wasted on a Plane ticket that I won't be using, it's none refundable & there's also a cancellation fee. So that's about £150 down the pan from my Mum's wages. I offered to pay my Mum back as I felt guilty but she said it doesn't matter, I've wasted so much of my Mum's money on this ticket, it's completely crap. I always end up wasting either my money or my parent's money on useless causes, I'm too soft with money & it stops here.

Haha [16 Nov 2004|05:35pm]
[ mood | amused ]

Just watched Fresh Prince of Bel Air & I was taping my foot in time with the beat on the music. Then I suddenly remembered something me & Gerben did to that music while he was over here, & I cracked up laughing, HAHAHA. It's nice suddenly remembering a fun, silly moment you had with your loved one.

2 Inspirations Inspire Me

[13 Nov 2004|09:41pm]
[ mood | creative ]

2 Inspirations Inspire Me

... [03 Nov 2004|09:47pm]
[ mood | ditzy ]

Toet toet...

14 Inspirations Inspire Me

[03 Nov 2004|08:55pm]
[ mood | bored ]

Happy for a change.

6 Inspirations Inspire Me

Nederlands leren met Gerben is heel leuk. [27 Oct 2004|12:11pm]
[ mood | confused ]

I did the title while Gerben spelt out the words in Dutch Alphabet. I sucked at it, haha. It took me about 2 minutes to write it. Gerben has decided that for the next hour & a half he is only going to speak to me in Dutch. It's proving very difficult. Some things I get straight away if it's maybe a singular word, but if he says a whole sentence to me in Dutch I get really confused. When I do get confused, he first uses pointing to things to explain what he's trying to say, but if that fails then he just tells me what it means in English.

Ok so now he says he's going to speak absolutely NO english, "Geen Engels, ik spreek alleen Nederlands."


Inspire Me

[25 Oct 2004|03:28pm]
[ mood | content ]
[ music | Mansun = No Signal/No Complaint ]

I have a runny nose

I, Louise )

Own this )

Cute Boy. )

1 Inspiration Inspire Me

Just wanted to share this... [14 Oct 2004|08:35pm]
[ mood | Feeling loved/In love ]
[ music | Supergrass - Funniest Thing ]

This is my Beautiful Boy.

I love him to bits too.

Inspire Me

Oh oh oh [13 Oct 2004|10:25pm]
[ mood | relieved ]

I just came twice. It seemed to heal my headache! That's the 3rd time I came today. Not my most though. Last week I managed to come about 9 times in the space of 1 hour, without the aid of my vibrator. I like manual stimulation more tbh, although I love my vibe, manual stimulation takes more time & concentration. Whereas vibe stimulation takes minutes, it's more of a quick way to relieve yourself. When you need relieving in a hurry, grab a vibe!

Feck I ain't been this horny while on my lonesome for a LONG time. I'm usually only horny when I'm physically with Gerben, or when we end up on a sexual topic of discussion, which is most nights.

I apologise to people for my crude journal entries, but I'm hoping the few people I have on my friend's list are open minded enough to cope with my horny journal entries, lol. I don't like having to keep things to myself. I want to share my horniness with the world!! I hope Gerben doesn't have a problem with my openess, although I'm sure he won't, he knows me well enough, & I like to think I know him well enough to know he won't mind, lol.

9 Inspirations Inspire Me

Slipping Away [13 Oct 2004|04:18pm]
[ mood | horny ]
[ music | Mansun - No Signal/No Complaints ]

God damn I'm feckin horny today! Gerben ain't gunna know whats hit him when I get my hands on him in 8 days! *winks*

Anyway, enough of the crudeness. Tis my 2nd day off work (cos I have Tue & Wed off). Tomorrow I'm working 8 - 1, kinda glad to be finishing at 1 tomorrow at least. I don't think I'm gunna need to do many 8 - 5 shifts now, although I do enjoy doing them, I'm happy with my hours now & the amount I'll be earning every month is perfect for me at the moment.

Just listening to my favourite band atm... think anyone who knows me well enough can guess who that is! ;o) I need to get more of my albums copied onto my PC to listen to. Now I have more memory & HD space it's not too bad having loads of Mp3's on here. When I had like 64mb RAM on my old PC & not as much HD space either, I had over 5000 Mp3's on my PC, lol. Noticed koalabear likes Incubus, good on ya girl, they rock! I love them, was obsessed with them for ages, collected all their EP's & albums, & now I ain't listened to them for ages. Love Audiovent too, their brother band. You can tell Hoobastank are a bit of a "rip-off" (don't like using that word as I like Hoobastank a lot) of Audiovent, really pretty music. I'm going to have a hunt round see if I can get hold of Slut's album. They are a German band I was introduced to earlier this year by a dude I know in Grimsby, who is a Mansun fan too, & has a Mansun-type band who most Grimsby people love (that's nice to know - bet most of them hate Mansun though, that's if they've heard of them). I sent a few acoustic Mansun tracks to Gerben but the only song I got feed back on was their track, "Harris" from the new/final album "Kleptomania", hehe. Never mind, he tried I guess, lol. I'm loving this album loads. Still keep listening to CD1 the most though, as that's the new/final material. I love it!!! As always NME gave them a shit review, but screw NME, they suck. Bring back Melody Maker, they loved Mansun!

I don't really have much else to talk about really. Have a headache I've been struggling to shift for a few days now. I'm disappointed in these Panadol pain killers, I only bought them after I had some in Holland & they worked fabulously! The British ones suck. So Gerben thats, Andrélon, Cinnamon tea (not really I have loads of that left still, about 4 boxes & 3 bags), some of the Panadol in the Green pack, TEH Pasta sauce!! haha. What the heck, don't bring any clothes, just bring me Dutch food in your suitcase! :oP You'll be naked most the time anyway ;oP

Do you like my lil' pink ducky? )

I wonder what it would be like to be with the in-crowd. I miss having a social life, but I hate the fact people can't accept me for who I am - not a party animal. It sucks sometimes to be the person who prefers staying in than going out every weekend & getting sloshed. But then again I like being the person who doesn't go out every weekend to get sloshed, it's just not in me. I grew out of those days. Just wish I could curl up with my other half for a cup of tea or hot chocolate infront of a cosy fire, might make me sound like an old woman, but fuck it, it's something I love & long for. I would just like to be able to go out every month, just once, with people I know, but they don't really wanna know me when I'm only a part-time pub goer. I'm really fuckin looking forward to the 28th, but I have to remind myself that the only reason this meetup with my "mates" is happening is because I want them to meet Gerben, & they want to meet him. Any other time I'd have no chance of arranging a meetup in the pub so quickly. I usually get zero replies on my phone about it. Oh well... c'est la vie.

I feel really sick all of sudden, I mean I've felt sick since about 5pm. I'm really worried for some reason :o(

Plus to make matters worse, KLM have put their flight price up YET AGAIN. And because I had a big fight with my Dad last night, he wouldn't let my use his credit card to book it, (even though it was probably the same price last night as it is today) & also they are out tonight & Mum isn't replying to my text message *cries* I hope they aren't home too late so I can book it tonight.

I miss you Gerben, hope your home soon, 'cos I need you.

Nearly only 1 week to go, I can't wait, the anticipation is killing me.

Hope everything is ok.

Inspire Me

Prettiness [12 Oct 2004|01:38pm]
[ mood | happy ]

I felt really really pretty last night & I do today as well, I'm glad. Won't last long though before I'm feeling ugly again, so I best make the most of it.

1 Inspiration Inspire Me

Random Pics that Loulou took, including some posing from myself, lol [11 Oct 2004|09:51pm]
[ mood | bored ]
[ music | MANSUN!!!!!!!! - Kleptomania ]

I'm feckin bored so.......

Cheesy thing )

My beautiful Ring )

Ooooh some really cute boy!!! )

Here's that cute boy again, I wonder who he is. I'm sure he was stalking me... hmm or maybe it was the other way round seeing as I was taking pictures of him.. hmmm.... )

A pretty flower I took in Holland )

Windmill in Kinderdijk )

Yummy!!! )

Blummin old picture I took with a crap camera back in December 2002, it's a bit lobsided, lol )

Kiss Kiss! )

Think this was taken in July, yeah )

Hands, lol )

Hahaha. Gerben took a picture of me asleep on his parent's sofa. I was poorly that day :o( )

Posing, sowwy. I got bored. )

Right I shall leave it at that :oP

2 Inspirations Inspire Me

Dum dum... [10 Oct 2004|08:24pm]
[ mood | geeky ]

# I like Gerben's BUM & I cannot lie, you other brothers can't deny #

1 Inspiration Inspire Me

Harris [09 Oct 2004|07:52pm]
[ mood | giddy ]

So I haven't updated properly for a while so I shall, although I haven't really got that much to report. I've been working at Asda for a month & a week now & I'm really enjoying it! I work with friendly people & that's what I was looking for more than anything else. I was fed up of getting into jobs where I had bitchy supervisors & collegues. I was petrified that this job was going to be the same, but to my sheer surprise it isn't. So I've been contracted fixed hours, which means I work the same contracted days every week. My Rota has been changed 3 times, the hopefully final time was today. My fixed hours are as follows,

Saturday: - 8:00 - 17:00
Sunday: - 8:00 - 17:00
Monday: - 8:00 - 13:00
Tuesday: - Off
Wednesday: - Off
Thursday: - 8:00 - 13:00
Friday: - 8:00 - 13:00

Not bad, not bad at all. Although for most of my 8 - 1 shifts I'll probably ask if I can do 8 - 5, for overtime, 'cos I need the money. Today I was doing 8 - 5, although I was still on my old rota, which was 12 - 5 on Saturdays, but I asked if I could start at 8 for some overtime. Then an evening shift girl phoned in sick, so I offered to stay in until 7pm, I only managed to 6pm though, I was tired, & Karen said I could go as they didn't really need another collegue there. The only Friday I can't work is the 22nd. Gerben is over on the 21st & we'd arranged special things for the 22nd as it's our 6 month aniversary, lol. So Mike said it was fine to have that Friday off.

I can't wait to see Gerben, it's going to be great, & so much fun *grins* ;o)

Best thing about it is I've finally managed to arrange a date with my mates to meet Gerben & I cannot wait to show him off to them. My really sexy boy ;o) Hazel from work is coming out too , so she'll get to meet my mates, & I'll also get to meet Ema's new boyfriend too. I bumped into Paul today an old mate from college, was nice to see him although it was brief. I might see if Ema can get him out that night too, it'll be great to see old mates, I might see if I can get Leanne to get intouch with Drever & Craig etc...

I need something adding to these falls I think, to make them look a bit more realistic, any suggestions? They just don't look as impressive as other people's attempts at their own falls. )

2 Inspirations Inspire Me

[06 Oct 2004|10:05pm]
[ mood | bouncy ]

daisyPath Wedding

Inspire Me

Teehee [05 Oct 2004|11:12pm]
[ mood | geeky ]

1 Inspiration Inspire Me

Disappear [02 Oct 2004|09:27pm]
[ music | Hoobastank - Disappear ]

Hoobastank - Disappear

There's a pain that sleeps inside
It sleeps with just one eye
And awakens the moment that you leave
Though I try to look away
The pain it still remains
Only leaving when you're next to me

Do you know, that everytime you're near
Everybody else seems far away
So can you come and make them disappear
Make them disappear and we can stay

So I stand and look around
Distracted by the sounds
Of everyone and everything I see
And I search through every face
Without a single trace, of the person
The person that I need

Do you know, that everytime you're near
Everybody else seems far away
So can you come and make them disappear
Make them disappear and we can stay

Can you make them disappear?
Make them disappear

There's a pain that sleeps inside
Sleeps with just one eye
And awakens, the moment that you leave
And I search through every face
Without a single trace, of the person
The person that I need

Do you know, that everytime you're near
Everybody else seems far away
So can you come and make them disappear
Make them disappear and we can stay

Let you know

I just thought that I'd let you know
That although I'm far
I'm close to you within
And all the time spent by your side
Is taken deep in me
Held for me to keep
To look upon when I'm feeling like
Everything and one
Is hurting me for something or other
It takes me to a better place
Nowhere I'd rather go
Thought I'd let you know
Who you are
What you do
Makes me burn to be in you
Who you are
And what you do
I'm burning to be in you
I just thought that I'd let you know
Being near you is
A gift I only wish I could treasure
But for now I'll sit and wait
I'm still burning though
Thought I'd let you know
Who you are
What you do
Makes me burn to be in you
Who you are
What you do
I'm burning to be in you
Thought I'd let you know
Feels like I'm falling
I'm all on my own
Thought I'd let you know
It feels like I'm falling
I'm all on my own
Thought I'd let you know
Who you are
And what you do
Makes me burn to be in you
Who you are
And what you do
I'm burning to be in you

From the heart

There was a time when our dreams felt so real
Just out of reach but not too far to feel
Together we'd finally make them come true
'Cause anythings possible when i was with you
But they kept on saying we'd never amount to anything....

All of the dreams we built up from the ground
They never believed them they just tore them down
We will rebuild them from the start, we will rebuild them from the heart

'Cause once all we wanted seemed so far away
But with everystep it was closer each day
The more that we tried it was within our grasp
The more that they told us that it wouldn't last
And everyone said we were crazy for giving up everything....

1 Inspiration Inspire Me

Aceness [01 Oct 2004|06:39pm]
[ mood | thankful ]

Got my Mansun CD, well chuffed. I feckin love these guys. R.I.P Mansun

Also got paid today so I'm no longer as poor. Although I have loads of money to pay out so I will be skint again soon.

Just listening to their cover of Magazine's track, "Shot by both sides" that they performed on Radio 1 a few years back, Chad sings it, he can't sing well but he pulls off this song great as it's a old skool punk song. Got goosebumps, I so love this band to bits, I'm missing them loads :o(

2 Inspirations Inspire Me

The Wait [30 Sep 2004|01:56pm]
[ mood | cold ]

I ordered Mansun's final album on Monday, the day it was released, from Play.com still waiting for the bloody postman to deliver it as it should be here today. The post is getting worse & worse. There was a time when your post would be on your doormat or in your letter box at about 7am. Not no more. It is now 2pm & still no sign. I WANT MY FRIGGIN CD ROYAL MAIL!!

I'm skint, I am the skintest I've been in literally years, & I hate it. I've never been this bad with my money for so long. I have £8 to my name until I get paid tomorrow, & I'm not sure how much I will get in my wages as 1 week is kept in arrears, then I have taxes & National Insurance contributions to come off. I just hope it's enough to buy my boots with, pay my board money, buy my new ring with, pay for my half of Gerben's flight, & then enough left to keep me going until next pay day, what with bus fares to work. I'm pissed off I won't be able to put any money in my Holland savings this month. My plan has gone to pot really, I don't think I'm going to be able to manage to put at least £400 in my savings account every month now. I also really need to figure out my overtime hours for tomorrow, as I'm off Saturdays, Sundays & Mondays, then I work Tuesdays & Wednesdays & I'm off on Thursdays. It's strange having set contracted hours, the same every week, I thought I'd hate it, but tbh I don't because I can plan my life better knowing what days I have off. I'm contemplating asking Mike if he needs anyone to work on Sundays as I'd rather just have Saturday & Monday off & work most Sundays, 'cos Sundays are boring. Then I'm going to try my hardest to do 8 - 5 or 9 - 5 shifts on Tuesdays, Wednesdays, Thursdays & Fridays as I need the cash. I wanted to work today, on overtime. But I have a cold & working in the chillers in freezing cold when you have a cold isn't fun at all, so I thought I'd take today off to rejuvenate.

Here have a flower on me )

And another one! )

I love flowers, I think it's going to become my main hobby to take pictures of plants & flowers!

Inspire Me

[27 Sep 2004|03:40pm]
[ mood | bored ]

I thought I'd resurrect my Extraordinary MeMe that I made all by myself, that is right, ALL by myself, aren't I a clever girl? )

2 Inspirations Inspire Me

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