| im sleepy Xo/ |
[15 Nov 2003|11:47am] |
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tka |
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this is just a song eddie dedicated to me ... que cuterz im loved
( tka - you're the one )
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| r.i.p pac |
[15 Nov 2003|09:09am] |
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2pac |
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i saw the 2pac movie last night. i enjoyed it. a lot. just because im talking about him, this was one of my favorite 2pac poems ever ...
jada
you are the omega of my heart
the foundation of my conception of love
when i think of what a black woman should be
it's you that i first think of
you will never fully understand
how deeply my heart feels for you
i worry that we'll grow apart
and i'll end up losing you
you bring me to climax without sex
and you do it all with regal grace
you are my heart in human form
a friend i could never replace
after watching that movie i finally understand the meaning behind this poem and who it was dedicated to. it only gives me chills every time i read it now =o( r . i . p
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| p.s. |
[13 Nov 2003|04:23am] |
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i need a layout ... bad. my finding nemo layout shows up when it wants to ... at least it does on my comp =oP can anyone help? a million thank you's in advance. i dont care what it looks like ... use your imagination!
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| the infamous gang banger |
[13 Nov 2003|03:50am] |
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keith murray |
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ok so im a complete nerd ... sue me =o) its almost 4am and i was bored. that was only one of the many pics i just took and im not posting any others. they're just scary and if i intend on keeping my friends ill keep those pics saved deep in my c drive. i dread this weekend ... im going to be so busy. my aunt asked me to type up my lil cousins science fair report. i used to hate those damn science fair projects in school. i havent done one since like freshman year and i dont miss it one bit. after typin that up for my cousin i have to study for a math test on monday, start working on one of two essays that i have to write, plus start on an extra credit chapter summary ... which are all due between the week of thanksgiving and december 2nd. wonderful. so basically ill have no life for a lil while. thats cool. not. oh well, ill survive. enough ranting ... ill post later if i have something meaningful to say. toodles!
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| long time no post |
[10 Nov 2003|02:54am] |
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nuffin |
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i said i would update about halloween horror nights like a week ago and here i am now =o/ such a procrastinator ... well, not really i havent had much time to sit and update. anyways enough babbling ...
halloween horror nights - i had so much fun! it wasnt as scary as i thought it was going to be, but i still screamed like a lil girl =o) i was holding onto eddies arm the whole time and i when something scary was about to happen i would hide behind his back, covering my face with his shirt. i took tons of pics, but i didnt get them on a disk so i can post them up =oP yea i know sowwie sucks to be you. hehe. he and i went to all the haunted houses except one ... only because i just couldnt walk anymore. the director's haunted house was crazy. it had all the slasher movies in it ... so people were dressed up like mike myers, texas chainsaw massacre, freddy, and whoever was there that i didnt see because my eyes were probably shut. there were people walking around just scaring the crap outta everyone ... people in those orange nuclear biohazard outfits, crazy tribal people, guys with chainsaws, freaky witch looking females ... oh my! it was uber cool. hehe. i would definitely do it again next year.
halloween - eddie and i went to the grove and hung out. he was the big bad wolf and i was lil red riding hood ... nobody was dressed like us! woo hoo! it was cool being original =o) half the females there were dressed like hookers and stuff of that nature ... basically with the least amount of clothing as possible. we stayed at the grove for a couple hours and left because there were way too many people. we had to park like 3 blocks away because the traffic was so disgusting.
the weekend of halloween i had 2 bday parties to go to ... joy. i got to spend time with family so it was fun. since then nothing interesting has really happened. school still sucks. i got an A on my human growth and development test ... go me! my cousin's baby shower was today ... that was cool. i took mercy with me since eddie had to work. we left about an hour before it ended to go pick eddie up from work and went back to mercy's house. nothing too exciting. thats about it ... im falling asleep at the keys here, so im gonna head off to bed. ive been spending a lot of time at my grandma's house helping out my mom, so excuse the tardiness in updating =o) still luv ya! toodles ... xoxo !!!
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| quickie |
[03 Nov 2003|01:32am] |
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nada |
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halloween horror nights was AWESOME. thats all i have to say for right now, ill elaborate on that another time ... im in a lazy mood and dont feel like typing everything and stuff. sowwie =o) next year i wanna check out the halloween theme park at busch gardens ... i heard that one was off the heezy fo sheezy. lol ... yea, imma nerd.
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| boo !!! |
[29 Oct 2003|11:46pm] |
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pink |
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hey everyone!! well, only 8 more hours until im going to get the rental car for my halloween horror nights trip. ::does cabbage patch:: lol. im super excited! i took this lil quiz to see what i should be for halloween ... its not too far off since im gonna be lil red riding hood instead of lil bo peep. hehe. okie dokie im off to finish packing ... talk to you all when i get back!! xoxo !!!
 you should dress up as little bo peep!innocent yet sultry. you're a bad girl trapped in a good girl's body. unlike little bo peep, you like some creepy crawly things! what should you be for halloween? |
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| i feel like poo |
[28 Oct 2003|04:13pm] |
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ja rule |
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marlins are world series champs! ok so im late ... im cuban, what can i say =oD hehe. im leaving for halloween horror nights in 2 days! me, being the nerd that i am, made a list of things i wanna bring and stuff ... as far as cds and miscellaneous junk. mom finally made the reservations for the hotel last night ... i was afraid eddie and i would get up there and have to drive around looking for a place to stay. my step-dad is gonna check out a rental car for us today i believe, well i hope. besides that quite a bit has happened since my last post. ive taken god knows how many tests in school ... my brain feels like its going to fall out. this past sunday was my friend mercy's baby shower. we had been planning everything for months, but decided that 3 days before the shower we would start making all the table decorations. such procrastinators we are. i ended up spending the weekend at her house so i would be able to wake up early in the morning to help get everything done. besides the last minute decorating, everything came out wonderful. there was enough food to feed the whole damn city! she received tons of gifts and i helped her put all of it away in her room. needless to say i was completely exhausted by sunday night. the next baby shower im going to is my cousins which is in 2 weeks! i had never been to a baby shower before and in the past month or so ive been to 3! way too many people are having babies ... it scares me. i think im gonna start practicing abstinence. lol. my grandma went for her 2nd chemo session last thursday. shes doing well i suppose. her hair is beginning to fall out =o/ it kinda scared me the first time i was trying to fix her bed head without knowing and a clump of hair came out. it was just freaky. hair or no hair shes still the smart ass grandma shes always been. hehe. shes eating better, which is great. im not sure how much weight shes gained, but at least shes gaining and not losing ... its not like anyone can tell because she wears those baggy housecoats all the time =o) well, thats about it for now. toodles ... xoxo !!!
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| im going to orlando ... nani nani boo boo |
[23 Oct 2003|01:46am] |
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r kelly |
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i bought my tickets to halloween horror nights! ::does happy dance:: ill be there on the 30th ... i cant wait!@$&%* i heard it was awesome ... my girl got terrified and so did my step-brother's girlfriend, so im sure ill be coming home with no voice. hehe. i know im not going for another week, but damnit i thought i would share my excitement =oD
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| i needed somethin to make me smile ... this was it |
[20 Oct 2003|11:48pm] |
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outkast |
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i made a new friend tonight. thats him ...
hes adorable. heres how we met ... i was getting out of my car when i got home and as i reached over to get my books to study, i heard heavy breathing by my leg. when i looked down thats what was there. its an american bulldog. i want him, but mom already told me not to get any ideas because shes not having a dog. that sucks. and i think hes well-trained or something ... when i bent down to try to take a pic of him he went around and laid down on his tummy behind me with his legs all spread out and stuff. and when i was just standing he wouldnt walk away, he stayed next to me. and when i told him to sit he sat. when i went to take the garbage out i didnt see him, so i thought he left, but he was right behind me by the time i got to the end of my driveway. now i cant seem to get rid of him, not that i want to, but im hoping maybe he'll find his way home or something ... unless he thinks he is home. hes sleeping outside my front door right now. hes precious =o)
( my new friend )
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| this isnt helping |
[08 Oct 2003|05:17pm] |
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cry me a river |
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if you're single when the week begins, your life is about to change. thats how my horoscope for the week started. im in a shitty mood as it is ... i dont need that crap =o/ on a better note, this is what it said for today ...
1o.8.o3 - a transformation is in progress, and you may not even recognize yourself when it's complete. whether you're interested in changing something about your physical, mental or emotional self, you get a great start at making improvements today. the best approach is a slow one, and if you get scared at any point, remember that this is for a good cause ... your self-esteem! rediscovering yourself can be quite fun if you let it be, and who knows, maybe when all is said and done, you'll find out that you were pretty happy with yourself in the beginning anyway.
i have a headache, so that'll about do it for now. toodles.
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| the cuban man |
[07 Oct 2003|08:10pm] |
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trick daddy |
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i found this in someone's journal and thought id post it on mine ...
it takes a cuban man to make a woman feel like a woman. on a recent transatlantic flight, a plane passes through a severe storm. the turbulence is awful, and things go from bad to worse when one wing is struck by lightning. one woman in particular loses it. screaming, she stands up in the front of the plane, "im too young to die," she wails. then she yells, "well, if im going to die, i want my last minutes on earth to be memorable! is there anyone on this plane who can make me feel like a woman?" for a moment there is silence. everyone has forgotten their own peril. they all stared, riveted, at the desperate woman in the front of the plane. then a cuban man stands up in the rear of the plane. he is gorgeous ... tall, well built, with dark brown hair and brown eyes. he starts to walk slowly, up the aisle, unbuttoning his shirt ... one button at a time. no one moves. he removes his shirt ... muscles ripple across his hairy chest. she gasps. he whispers, "iron this, and get me something to eat."
that sums a cuban man completely right there. for all the cuban men out there who arent like that ... sowwie =o) i still luv ya! hehe
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| thats all i can stands and i cant stands no more |
[05 Oct 2003|08:37pm] |
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youngbloodz |
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i meant to post this on tuesday, but i typed it up and saved it instead. since that post i had to add things about whats been goin on. ugh ... ill never understand men!
i talked to him. really talked to him. poured my heart out is more like it. i told him everything i was feeling and he seemed to understand. he even shed a couple tears. he told me he wont call me as much because he knows im busy with everything and him calling me a million times a day doesnt help me get anything done. he understood when i said i kinda need some space, hence him not calling me as much, but also us not seeing each other every day. he knows i still care and i dont want to break up i just need a lil breathing room. talking to him was easier than i thought. i was expecting him to blow up and get all defensive on me, but he understood and told me it was normal to feel this way and that i wasnt a horrible girlfriend for feeling like this. i guess i dont give him enough credit. i love you sweetie.
edit 10.2.03 - ok maybe he doesnt understand. ever since we had that talk hes only called me more. he gets mad when im at school too long ... it doesnt cross his mind i could be studying. heavens forbid i would take my schoolwork a lil farther than just the classroom. whatever. hes only gotten worse. since i asked him not to call as much he right away thinks theres someone else. go fuck yourself. i dunno what to do anymore. its like im damned if i do and damned if i dont. i tell him whats on my mind because he wants to know, he deserves to know, and now its kicking me in the ass. i dont even know why i said anything in the first place =o/
edit 10.3.03 - he broke up with me. told me i was keeping something from him. its like he wants me to do something bad because he seems to be waiting for it. hes driving me nuts. i wasnt sure if space was what we really needed before, but i think that would be the best thing right now only because hes getting too crazy for me to handle. i need time to myself, to concentrate on school, to take care of my grandma, to spend time with my family. i dont need him breathing down my neck and analyzing everything i do to find something wrong with it. ugh!
edit 10.4.03 - he wants to get back together. of course he does because everything he said to me last night was out of anger. bastard. why doesnt he think before he speak? especially if its about breaking up! i dont think i wanna get back with him right now. god i love him so much and its so hard to see him and tell him to his face that we need this space more than i thought we did. he cried ... i cried ... it was hard. im gonna be by myself for awhile. i need time to think about my life and where its going now that i have the opportunity. i know im still gonna talk to him everyday and i still have the same feelings for him so things wont be so different except the fact that we're not "together". wow, im single now. i dont even wanna think about it =o(
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| weekly romantic horoscope for pisces |
[28 Sep 2003|02:18am] |
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evanescence |
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9.22.03 - 9.28.03
it's amazing how well you tune out unwelcome advances on monday and tuesday. you know what it's like to ask in vain, but you cant muster a lot of sympathy when the roles are reversed. if desire or finances tie you to one who isnt good for you, wednesday and thursday are challenging. maybe nothing will change, but it's a major step to even consider a different arrangement or absolute freedom. difficult relationships seem to get worse on friday or saturday. one party stops pretending, and the other struggles to cope. maybe you finally reach a shared goal and dont know what to do next. sunday is a triumphant conclusion to a frustrating week. even if you dont end up with the right person, you now have a map to get you there.
even my horoscope talks about change ... maybe these things have some meaning after all ::shrugs::
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| more babbling |
[27 Sep 2003|04:06am] |
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tv - vanilla sky |
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my head feels like its spinning. i have so much on my mind i dont even know where to start. luckily i took my 2 tests at school already, so i dont have to stress over them anymore. i lost like a week's worth of sleeping studying for one of those tests ... and then the teacher says we can use our books/notes the day of the exam. i was super ecstatic, but at the same time wanted to poke her eyes out with a paper clip. because i lost so much sleep ive found myself back at my old sleeping habits ... going to bed around 5 or 6 in the morning =o/ great. my grandma is doing ok ... im not sure when shes gonna start chemo, but it should be soon. i havent been over there as much ... i now it sounds horrible ... i just feel all funny over there now. i was over yesterday. it was her 85th birthday =o) we had dinner and stuff. i was asleep when she opened my card. i was kinda pissed about that. i mean i only slept maybe an hour ... they could have waited. oh well. ive been feeling very negative lately, having a lot of second thoughts about things ... my life in particular, where i want to go from here, and if i even wanna be where im at anymore. i mean its gotten so bad that i dont even know if i wanna be with eddie anymore ... not that he isnt the best thing to come into my life, because he is ... its just that if i dont know what i want, and i dont wanna drag him along for the ride while i "find myself" since i dont even know what im looking for. i dont wanna lose the best thing i have just because i want to see whats out there, and i dont mean that as in finding another guy ... because that wont happen. ive just never been alone. ive been "taken" since i was 14 ... like from one boyfriend to the next like some kinda crazy love chain im trying to keep going or something. its not that i wanna know what it feels like to be single ... i want to know what its like to truly be independent, and i want to know what thats like before i decide to settle down with anyone. thats only fair, right? i feel horrible for even thinking like this ... eddie was a dream come true and im having these thoughts. is this normal? how do i deal with it? i need to stop thinking, its only gonna get me in trouble =o/
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| im speechless |
[20 Sep 2003|03:11am] |
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i found out a couple days ago my grandma has cancer ... im devastated. i dont know how to deal with something like this. the last time someone in my family passed away was when i was like 3 and knowing that my grandma might only have a few years to live makes me want to drive my car off a bridge. i try to hide it, especially around my mom, because i know shes stressed enough and i dont need her worrying about me crying my ass off ... im sure she does it herself and i wont be helping. im trying to act like im ok around eddie ... i know he has no control over it. even though i did explode on him yesterday over everything poor baby. i think i even bitched at him because i hit like 3 red lights in a row. when i come home is when i get all emotional ... because im alone and the only one that can hear me cry is my cat. im not posting this for anyones sympathy ... i just need to vent a lil bit. i guess ill end this now since the venting isnt helping any. oh well. ill post whenever i get a chance ... toodles. xoxo
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| aww i love him |
[15 Sep 2003|12:03am] |
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adam sandler |
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my baby dedicated this song to me last night and i thought i would post it. hes the bestest boyfriend ever ... hehe.
i wanna make you smile whenever you're sad
carry you around when your arthritis is bad
all i wanna do is grow old with you
i'll get your medicine when your tummy aches
build you a fire if the furnace breaks
oh it could be so nice, growin old with you
i'll miss you, kiss you, give you my coat when you are cold
need you, feed you, i'll even let you hold the remote control
so let me do the dishes in the kitchen sink
put you to bed when you've had too much to drink
oh i could be the man to grow old with you
i wanna grow old with you
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| :: throws confetti :: |
[30 Aug 2003|01:53am] |
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beyonce |
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omg its here ... my 1 year anniversary with eddie! i cant believe it ... time flew by so fast. well, we have a fun filled day planned ahead of us ... we're going with my mom and step-dad to some jewelry store in downtown ... i guess thats where eddie plans on buying my gift, otherwise i doubt we would be going with them considering its at like 9am! ugh i hate mornings ... lol. after that eddie and i are heading out to the seaquarium for the day, and at night i have a lil dinner surprise for him ... i dont wanna say just in case he reads this tonight. hehe. i will post that later along with what i bought him =o) thats about it ... since its 2am and i have to be up in like 6 hours im gonna get goin ... just wanted to post that today is my anni!!! lol im so excited! xoxo !!!
p.s - happy 1 year anni to melo and rigo too! love ya tons !!!
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| traffic, teachers, and textbooks |
[27 Aug 2003|02:22am] |
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pharrell |
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well school starts tomorrow ... im so thrilled about that =oP im nervous because im going to a new college, but at the same time since ive already been in college a year its like "oh yay more school" i have math on mondays and wednesdays ... critical thinking/ethics and human growth and development is on tuesdays and thursdays. i have a pretty easy schedule this term *thank goodness* i was so burned out from spring term i dont even wanna think about it. hopefully this time around ill be more focused and all that stuff. anyways ... gimme some ideas about what i should do on my anni girls *check the post from the 24th* i already have an idea what i wanna do for dinner ... if anybody has any other ideas let me know so i can get everything arranged by saturday. thanx! well i guess i better get goin ... i still have to pick out an outfit for tomorrow and get my stuff together so i dont look like a crazy woman in the morning. hehe. talk to ya soon ... toodles! xoxo !!!
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