Below are the 15 most recent journal entries recorded in ashley's Blurty:

Tuesday, February 24th, 2004
1:07 pm	I never got to go Current Mood: anxious Current Music: none (Comment on this)
Friday, February 20th, 2004
12:45 pm	dance the dance is tonight and I am SO excited!!!! I've been waiting for this all weekend!!! Thomas is going to be there and all is going to be great!!!! Current Mood: excited Current Music: bob marley (Comment on this)
Thursday, February 19th, 2004
12:26 pm	dreaming of you AHHHH this life is driving me CRAZY!!! I hate being away from my family. It's the worst pain you could ever feel. I sit in my bed and dream about the day we can all be a family again. My little brother and sister feel like they have lost both me and my older brother Jesse... I want this system to be over with. I miss you guys:'( Late at night when all the world is sleeping I stay up and think of you And I wish on a star That somewhere you are thinking of me too * Cause I'm dreaming of you tonight Til tomorrow I'll be holding you tight And there's nowhere in the world I'd rather be Than here in my room dreaming about you and me Wonder if you ever see me and I wonder if you know I'm there If you looked in my eyes Would you see what's inside would you even care I just wanna hold you close but so far All I have are dreams of you So I wait for the day (wait for the day) And the courage to say How much I love you (yes I do) ** I'll be dreaming of you tonight Til tomorrow I'll be holding you tight And there's nowhere in the world that I'd rather be Than here in my room dreaming about you and me Ahh ahh I can't stop dreaming of you I can't stop dreaming I can't stop dreaming of you Late at night when all the world is sleeping I stay up and think of you And I still can't believe That you came up to me and said I love you I love you too Now I'm dreaming with you tonight Til tomorrow and for all my life And there's nowhere in the world I'd rather be Than here in my room Dreaming with you endlessly Current Mood: stressed Current Music: Salena (Comment on this)
12:26 pm	dreaming of you AHHHH this life is driving me CRAZY!!! I hate being away from my family. It's the worst pain you could ever feel. I sit in my bed and dream about the day we can all be a family again. My little brother and sister feel like they have lost both me and my older brother Jesse... I want this system to be over with. I miss you guys:'( Late at night when all the world is sleeping I stay up and think of you And I wish on a star That somewhere you are thinking of me too * Cause I'm dreaming of you tonight Til tomorrow I'll be holding you tight And there's nowhere in the world I'd rather be Than here in my room dreaming about you and me Wonder if you ever see me and I wonder if you know I'm there If you looked in my eyes Would you see what's inside would you even care I just wanna hold you close but so far All I have are dreams of you So I wait for the day (wait for the day) And the courage to say How much I love you (yes I do) ** I'll be dreaming of you tonight Til tomorrow I'll be holding you tight And there's nowhere in the world that I'd rather be Than here in my room dreaming about you and me Ahh ahh I can't stop dreaming of you I can't stop dreaming I can't stop dreaming of you Late at night when all the world is sleeping I stay up and think of you And I still can't believe That you came up to me and said I love you I love you too Now I'm dreaming with you tonight Til tomorrow and for all my life And there's nowhere in the world I'd rather be Than here in my room Dreaming with you endlessly Current Mood: hopeless Current Music: Salena (Comment on this)
12:24 pm	wait and bleed> love this song I've felt the hate rise up in me... Kneel down and clear the stone of leaves... I wander out where you can't see... Inside my shell, I wait and bleed... Goodbye! I wipe it off on tile, the light is brighter this time Everything is 3D blasphemy My eyes are red and gold, the hair is standing straight up This is not the way I pictured me I CAN'T CONTROL MY SHAKES! How the hell did I get here? Something about this, so very wrong... I have to laugh out loud, I wish I didn't like this Is it a dream or a memory? GET OUTTA MY HEAD CUZ I DON'T NEED THIS! Why I didn't I see this? I'm a victim - Manchurian Candidate I - HAVE - SINNED - BY - JUST Makin' my mind up and takin' your breath away GOODBYE! You haven't learned a thing I haven't changed a thing My flesh was in my bones The pain was always free I've felt the hate rise up in me... Kneel down and clear the stone of leaves... I wander out where you can't see... Inside my shell, I wait and bleed... AND IT WAITS FOR YOU! Current Mood: angry Current Music: slipknot (Comment on this)
Wednesday, February 18th, 2004
1:50 pm	thomas alright, So I met this guy that lives in the group home next to me. His name is Thomas, he's reeally hott and he likes me.....Umm yea I like him too, a lot actually and he just asked me to go to the "sweethearts" dance with him on Friday. I can't wait....I just hope we end up being more than friends.. Get a load of me, get a load of you Walkin' down the street, and I hardly know you It's just like we were meant to be Holding hands with you, and we're out at night Got a girlfriend, you say it isn't right And I've got someone waiting too This is, this is just the beginning We're already wet, and we're gonna go swimming Why can't I breathe whenever I think about you Why can't I speak whenever I talk about you It's inevitable, it's a fact that we're gonna get down to it So tell me Why can't I breathe whenever I think about you Isn't this the best part of breakin' up Finding someone else you can't get enough of Someone who wants to be with you too It's an itch we know we are gonna scratch Gonna take a while for this egg to hatch But wouldn't it be beautiful Here we are, we're at the beginning We haven't fucked yet, but > heads spinning Why can't I breathe whenever I think about you Why can't I speak whenever I talk about you It's inevitable, it's a fact that we're gonna get down to it So tell me Why can't I breathe whenever I think about you I'd love for you to make me wonder Where it's goin' I'd love for you to pull me under Somethin's growin' for this that we can control Baby I am dyin' Why can't I breathe whenever I think about you Why can't I speak whenever I talk about you Why can't I breathe whenever I think about you Why can't I speak whenever I talk about you It's inevitable, it's a fact that we're gonna get down to it So tell me Why can't I breathe whenever I think about you hope we end up being more than friends... Current Mood: horny Current Music: liz phair (Comment on this)
1:48 pm	behind blue eyes No one knows what it's like To be the bad man To be the sad man Behind blue eyes An' no one knows what it's like To be hated To be fated To telling only lies But my dreams They aren't as empty As my conscience seems to be I have hours, only lonely My love is vengeance That's never free No one knows what it's like To feel these feelin's Like I do And I blame you No one bites back as hard On their anger None of my pain an' woe Can show through No one knows what it's like To be mistreated To be defeated Behind blue eyes And no one knows how to say That they're sorry An' don't worry I'm not telling lies No one knows what it's like To be the bad man To be the sad man Behind blue eyes Current Mood: indescribable Current Music: limp bizkit (Comment on this)
1:01 pm	until the day i die Until the day I die I'll spill my heart for you, for you Until the day I die I'll spill my heart for you As years go by I race the clock with you But if you died right now You know that I'd die to I'd die too You remind me of the times When I knew who I was (I was) But still the second hand will catch us Like it always does We'll make the same mistakes I’ll take the fall for you I hope you need this now Cause I know I still do Until the day I die (Until the day I die) I'll spill my heart for you Until the day I die (Until the day I die) I'll spill my heart for you Should I bite my tongue? Until blood soaks my shirt We'll never fall apart Tell me why this hurts so much My hands are at your throat And I think I hate you But still we'll say, "remember when" Just like we always do Until the day I die (Until the day I die) I'll spill my heart for you Until the day I die (Until the day I die) I'll spill my heart for you Yeah I'd spill my heart!!!!!! Yeah I'd spill my heart for you!!!!!!! My hands are at your throat And I think I hate you We made the same mistakes Mistakes like friends do My hands are at your throat And I think I hate you We made the same mistakes Until the day I die I'll spill my heart for you, for you Until the day i die(Until the day I die) I'll spill my heart for you, for you Until the day i die(Until the day I die) I'll spill my heart for you Until the day i die(Until the day I die) Until the day I die!!!!!!!! Current Mood: energetic Current Music: Story of the year (Comment on this)
Monday, February 16th, 2004
2:49 pm	alone im sitting here all by myself.....no one to talk to, no one to express any feeling...I live in a group home at the moment, i miss my family and I want to go back home to Manhattan Kansas...that's where I belong not some house of people I dont even know....it makes me feel like IVE done something wrong...It's not my fault my parents beat the crap out of me..But then I think about it and I realize that I must have done something to make them upset...maybe I wasn't pretty enough for them maybe I didnt do chores as often as they would like maybe I was just hard to understand, hard to get along with. WHATS WRONG WITH ME why cant I be the perfect daughter? Why is all of this happening to me...I try suicide and I fail I go to hospitals and listen to people try to convince me that Im "ill" and I need help....well maybe I do...Maybe i do need help maybe I am "ill" is there anyone that understands???? Current Mood: depressed Current Music: slipknot (Comment on this)
Friday, February 13th, 2004
9:11 am	wasssssssah hey there.....I'm really up there and just thought I would........yea...Im looking at pics and it's very interesting.....if ANYONE wants to talk go ahead and send me something (Comment on this)
9:11 am	wasssssssah hey there.....I'm really up there and just thought I would........yea...Im looking at pics and it's very interesting.....if ANYONE wants to talk go ahead and send me something (Comment on this)
9:11 am	wasssssssah hey there.....I'm really up there and just thought I would........yea...Im looking at pics and it's very interesting.....if ANYONE wants to talk go ahead and send me something (Comment on this)
9:11 am	wasssssssah hey there.....I'm really up there and just thought I would........yea...Im looking at pics and it's very interesting.....if ANYONE wants to talk go ahead and send me something (Comment on this)
9:11 am	wasssssssah hey there.....I'm really up there and just thought I would........yea...Im looking at pics and it's very interesting.....if ANYONE wants to talk go ahead and send me something (Comment on this)
Thursday, February 12th, 2004
1:05 pm	DUBS hey y name is Ashley DuBree but my friends call me DUBS.......yea Current Mood: mischievous Current Music: slipknot (Comment on this)