| Finals part deux |
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| 02:08pm 18/05/2004 |
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mood:  working music: "You're my best friend" by Queen
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Okay so I have had one final so far and the next one is tomorrow! YIKES! it is the hainous class that i wanted to drop way back in March, anyway hopefully i will do okay on it and if i dont i am at the point where i just dont care anymore, anyway. I just want to sit back and relax with my friends and be able to enjoy their company without all this stress that is going on right now. On the other hand, Gordon left today. That was such a sad moment. I know he and i have ahd our problems in the past and what have you, but when i hugged him and we both had our moment, i felt like everything was okay again. Maybe its because i am a hopeless romantic, but i hope that the walk to the PAC we took the other day was our way of saying "I'm sorry" to one another. When i was done hugging him and Joel, my two roomies, i walked in the hall and immediately started bawiling. It was movie-esque. and they're coming BACK next year, what will happen when i have to say goodbye to the seniors and Lucas? Good lord what emotions! |
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| FINALS |
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| 10:41am 17/05/2004 |
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mood:  melancholy music: "Just What I needed"
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So finals blow the proverbial ass! I had my calculus final the other day and i about cried when i left the building. I hope hope hope that i get my Q from that class otherwise i am up shit creek and i would have wasted a YEAR with that class. Anyway, other than that things are starting to get really bittersweet around here. People are moving out and packing up and it is starting to seem to me that i should have spent more time here in this dorm with these people that i love SO much. i am going to miss living with them next year, they were so good to me. We were perfect for each other i think. and Kathryn, what a great roommate she has seen me at my utmost worst and at my best and she has been there for me both ways, i love her so much and i am going to miss sleeping in the same room with her every night. I guess what it comes down to is that i am established myself, my friends, and my future here and now i am being forced to leave |
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| Hi Hi |
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| 04:17pm 08/05/2004 |
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mood:  happy music: "Come Sail Away"
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Okay...i am in a great mood...for once! I had a wonderful time at my formal last night for Kappa (Kappa Kappa Kappa Gamma I'm so happy that i am a). My date was Damon and he was SO wonderful. We made EVERYONE jealous with our mad...making out skills? Anyway, i also have Playwright's tonite which will be a GREAT time. Then we have like the ultiimate birthday, cast, end-of-the-year party. YAY FOR FRIENDS!! Well I'm off i have been sitting in the sun for ever and now i need to take a shower and do a few things before the madness begins! |
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| Hellz No |
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| 12:55pm 25/04/2004 |
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mood:  sick music: "In the End" Linkin Park
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THANK YOU LORD ABOVE FOR ENDING THIS WEEKEND! Dont get me wrong it was amazing and i loved having my family here, but with Little 5 it was just insane. I liked being on sterring conmittee and being the bitch in the red t-shirt but when you have to redirect traffic and also deal with the drunks on this campus (which there are a lot of, it gets a little insane). It was a fun weekend though, i got to hang out will all my friends. Friday, i went to Kill Bill with my friends and it was amazing and then we all went and hung out at the QC which was fun. Saturday it was crazy. I had to do all the littl 5 stuff then hang out with the fam and then we went and did ALL kinds of crazy things at night. I hope everyone is alive and okay after this weekend, there were tears, laughs, sex, drinking and everything else under the sun. Okay...i need to go back to the PAC, Much Love! |
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| GodDAMMIT |
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| 06:21pm 20/04/2004 |
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mood:  nostalgic music: "Crutch" by Matchbox Twenty
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Speak Out Week is thankfully over, now on to the next project. Thank God i have Shaney to be involved in ALL of the same things that i am involved in otherwise i would be going insane. She and I being on the newly elected United DePauw exec board have been going insane recently for speak out week and now we are on Steering Comittee for Little 5, which again for those of you not attending DePauw and who read this journal, is a race of bikes around the PAC and we do it annually, it is like our biggest football game yet in the spring. This past weekend went alright though. Anti-Prom was a success and i think everyone had a good time, but then the repurcussions of the weekend came. I had a talk with a dear friend and things are hopefully fixed but who knows and my other two friends broke up, or at least i think they did...who knows anymore.
Another thing is, is that i have just started to get SO GODDAMN emotional lately. Like today at my radio show i was telling Jeff, i played all these songs and after a bunch of them i would come on and say "those songs reminded me or this person....yadda yadda yadda" It was RETARDED. and another instance was when i was in rehearsal today and Cody brought up his job in Japan, which i already knew he accepted, and i damn near cried on set. Its horrendous. God i will miss them. Well i need to get some actual work done. Much Love and Pride All |
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| O MY GAWD! |
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| 11:25pm 08/04/2004 |
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mood:  confused music: "Yeah" by Usher
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Okay...could i be more emotional right now? CHECK YES! Anyway so on top of being he newly elected Co-President of United Depauw, I also got the lead in the new play that my dear friend Amy Baumgartner is directing. I play an English debutante that likes to put "poo" after EVERYTHING! Should be fun! That's my good news thouhg but on the other hand, things juts aren't going well in the friends department. I have a good friend who i feel isnt giving me the time of day and when i go and tell him things, like my election or my new part, i feel like he just doesnt care about me anymore when i obvioudly would stop the world and turn in around for him if he asked. I have talked to few people about this and we cant seem to put a finger on what could truly bug him. I just feel like he is trying to replace what we have and somehow slide me out of the picture without telling me what was on his mind. I wish he would just come to me and tell me what was wrong! I can take whatever he has to say, i am not some little girl with fragile emotions. AHHHH! okay, i need to go finish a french paper, Talk amongst yourselves! |
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| SO Thrilled |
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| 11:50am 01/04/2004 |
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mood:  excited music: "Kappa Song" by Kappas
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Okay so not to mention that this week is hell, in a busy sort of way, i am having a great one. It is I-week for all the sororities on campus. For those of you who aren't greek or who don't go to DePayw I-week s inspiration week, we get a bunch of presents, our paddles, beer steins, bonding with sisters, etc. For guys it is commonly called HELL week. Anyway, i have been UBER busy with all of that. The even BETTER news is that I got voted to by PRESIDENT of United DePauw which is our LGBTS....etc etc here at DePauw. My co-president is Ashley Baxstrom which will be so awesome seeing as how we are living together next year. It was sad though, seeing elections because i know that ina few months from now, i will be standing up there with MJM, Bax, Shaney, and Natalie knwoing that Cody, Damon, and Raker were once in my shoes. Man i want school to end but atthe same time i dont. Anyway, enough of my tangent! I am off to a meeting in the PAC...WHERE ELSE? Ciao Loverlies! |
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| Spr-zing Break Yizall! |
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| 03:17pm 21/03/2004 |
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mood:  lethargic music: E'rebody in the Club get Tipsy-J-Kwon
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Alright So i am OFFICIALLY on Spring Break! I like being on breaks from school but for some reason i can only deal with being home for like 4 days before i start to get really wierded out and i want to go back to school. But on the other hand, i have always wanted to be with my friends. Thats just who i am. Anyway, past the inner monologue. I am going to have a good Spring Break, i just went to MSU to visit the beautiful miss Katie Hofmeyer and we went out and had the best night!!! I love her she is my BFF! This week will be insane, i have to look for a job, which sucks. I am going to visit some of the gang at U of M and just bum around campus and hopefully hook up with some peeps who are home right now! Gordo was supposed so come chill in the EGR but he cant he's got the MONO. Sicky-Icky. Well i off to be college bum and mooch off the parents! |
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| yay procrastination |
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| 05:55pm 15/03/2004 |
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mood:  peaceful music: "Moonlight Sonata"
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So the stress has culminated and then died down, just like it always does. We had our New Member Retreat, Kapp Informal, 4 Showings of Proof, and homework this weekend. It was INTENSE, to say the least. Now, though i can take my time and get around and see some people and actually hang out after class instead of having to immediately be at the PAC forever. I have been interviewing for different programs over campus which has been fun, i really hope i am a Mentor though, that would be FANTASTIC! Right now, i am just ready for a break though, i hate going home just cuz i know no one will be there but at the same time it will be nice to relax. I have a math exam to study for right now, but i am putting it off like i always do. There is one thing that i am happy for tonite, i won't be at chapter. The pledge class really screwed somethings up and i cant wait to hear about that. Hopefully, it wont be too awkward and the girls wont be too mad at us. I just feel awful though that we disappointed them somehow. Well i need to get to studying! |
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| Count It! |
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| 12:21am 04/03/2004 |
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mood:  stressed music: "Love Song" by 311
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So the first time i have really been able to sit down ALL week so far and it is 12:20 in the morning and i still have homework to do...yeah that's a big hip hip hooray for college life folks! My days have been packed, i am the ASM (for all you non-theatre folks that is Assistant Stage Manager), i have a job at Admissions, which is great because i do get money on a pretty weekly basis, i am in the best fucking house on campus, Kappa Kappa Gamma, and i am involved in other things such as mentorships, united depauw etc etc. WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH ME? i have been so stressed lately that i can't handle it. I was literally crying to my Best friend back home tonite! I used to be this busy in high school, how did i get it all done? Its a goddam mystery. OH and to top it all off i have to miss my opening night or skip out on the last 2 hours of my NEW MEMBER RETREAT plus i am missing another night of the show because of our informal. On that note, my though of the night is: Scare house is my new home!! :-D |
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| I love Gay Men |
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| 12:46am 23/02/2004 |
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mood: annoyed music: What U see is what you get...Britney Spears
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So my weekend has been insane! We have these flowerins with the different pledge classes between soroities and frats, and we had this huge one with our "brother frat" on friday. Kappa and SAE held it down like it was our job. BUT, that is not the reason for this entry today, there will be plenty more about the shananigans between our two houses, i'm sure. I guess the reason that i am writing right now is that i am just extremely confused and worried right now. The more and more i try to help some of my friends, the less and less i feel like they respond to it. I want them to make the right decisions, and they don't seem to want any part of that. How do i react to that? They are my friends, my brothers, basically, i love them as if i have known them and the things that they want to do either involve leaving me or just plain not listening. With the guys who actually look out for me leaving, i don't know what i will do. It's just insane! I do Love GAY MEN....i really truly do. |
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| Good God Y'all |
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| 11:11am 19/02/2004 |
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mood:  blah music: Kappa Kappa Gamma Song By DJ $krilla
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Well i have come to the conclusion that this semester will not be about classe sbut more about my social life. My first semester i tagged along with my BFF, Gordon, now this semester i have my own group of friends that i have made on my own. Mind you they still involve Gordon, but i have made my own connections which is truly the important thing here. Anyway, my classes BLOW. I have changed my major from Sports Med to Theatre and Communications so i have no need for this STUPID ASS science class that I am taking. I was talking with Hecker today after class and the prof is RIDIC! It's like we are taking a Stats or Physics class. Where is the health? Where is the Excersise Science? It's all really stupid graphs and conversions and this and that. The other day we did a full 2 hour and 40 min class on GRAPHS! Als and Yates had to poke me for 10 min to wake me up. WHAT THE HELL? i am dropping that class faster than you can drop kick a midget, thats for damn sure. Anyway, it is time to busy again. Gotta go to a meeting for RAC, then to do some homework, then rehearsal, then UD.. Yay for my life |
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| Fuckin' Kappa Yeah! |
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| 12:55pm 17/02/2004 |
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mood:  ecstatic music: Just Dance by Jamaroquoi
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Well in response to my previous journal entry, I, Lindsay A Bartlett, of Grand Rapids Michigan and now Humbert 316 has joined a sorority. And it is the best damned sorority on this whole mother f-in campus. Kappa Kappa Gamma is the house which i call my new home. It was SUCH a difficulyt decision for me to make, but after it was all over and i had got my bids i called my friends, the friends who are all independent who i almost didn't rush because i wanted to be with them. They all told me that this was the right house for me and they had seen me in there since the beginning when i first met them which was something i loved hearing. I will never forget seeing Jeff in Julian and having him hug me and say "now there's my favorite little Kappa!" What can i say? I love my house and i love my sisters. Kappa what? Anyway we have a flower in tonite...woot! But right now i have my radio show so peace out. Show me that Kappa love |
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| CRAZINESS! |
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| 12:43pm 13/02/2004 |
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mood: confused music: John Mayer: Bigger than my Body
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Attention Ladies and Gents of DPU and of the world. Sorority Rush has BEGUN! Sadly, i don't know what to think of that. Should i be excited like my roomate and my floormates are or should i be apprehensive? When i came to this school the defining factor of what was its Greek Life. I wanted to live in a house and I was sure that I would get in, but then i met my friends. Doug, Jeff, Cody, Damon, Kelsie, Lucas, and Gordon are some o fmy closest friends on this campus and they aren't rushing nor were they ever in a greek house. I feel like my circle of friends has this fraternity/sorority going on already. We even have a name: Gamma Alpha Upsilon! I don't know what i should do, should I rush a sorority but the whole time pledege my allegiance to the real friends I have or should I stay behind with the boys who I am with everyday and are the only ones, at times, that can cheer me up? I really don't know what to do! AHH RUSH is way to confusing. On that note: RUSH GAMMA ALPHA UPSILON! |
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| A Sad Day here at DePauw |
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| 09:44pm 08/02/2004 |
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mood: depressed music: Grey Street by Dave Matthews Band
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Today my good friend, Kellen Mogck has passed away. He was a great guy, he loved to make people laugh and most of all he was a great friend. I found out today 30 minutes before having to put on my last show of "Spring's Awakening." Alia and I had a good cry but it still doesn't help the fact that i will never see him again. It's so strange to think that we all come here in August thinking the people we meet will be with us for 4 more years or maybe in our lives forever, never do we think that they could be taken from us so suddenly. It is a hard time for most people on campus. On top of that we all have our work to do and to go about or lives. I haven't been through this since Kabook died. It brings up a lot of old, and not wanted feelings |
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| Here it is |
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| 01:35pm 06/02/2004 |
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mood:  worried music: It Goes Full Circle....Good Luck Joes
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The show has finally opened! Thank God, last night we had a great show, a lot of my friends came out. Mostly School of Music girls who i adore and i cannot believe they came. I miss them all SO much! Erica, Steph, Molly, Mary, and MC all came and it was awesome. The show was also sold out on our first night, everyone was ecstatic. Then i got home...apparantly while i was at the show my friend Kellen had gotten into a really serious car accident. He has head trauma and has been in brain surgery but they are hopeful for his recovery. I don't know what it is about this winter but so far its been like 3 people i know in really bad car accidents. Thank God i had the gang around to help with it. Tiff, Baxstorm, G, Audge, Jen, Ober, and I all went down ordered some Marv's and watched Boondock Saints with a few drinks...What can i say? Only this: That's what friends are for! |
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| Hey Ya! |
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| 11:59am 02/02/2004 |
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Okay, so first day of classes, all i have to say is...MISH! Not to mention that i am still going with my winter term so basically if you want to look at it, i am taking two terms in the span of one, but that is the life of an actor. Okay so I guess i am melodramatic today but who cares? I am allowed to be right? So get this, I haven't seen my roommate, Kathryn, or my floormate, Courtney pretty much all of winter term and they went home for a few days while i had to stay here and...what else?...work on the play for winter term...Anyway, i go to rehearsal last night at 6 thinking oh...hey maybe i will be able to come home and watch some of the SuperBowl with my roomies..N-No! I was at the PAC until 12, thats 12...MIDNIGHT!! QUESTION MARK?!!?! ARGH! Whatev, at least one of our directors didnt get fired, im looking at you opera folks! Well thus, ends my tangent and my rant for today i am sure there will be more to come! Peace Out |
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| Finally |
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| 03:56am 01/02/2004 |
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mood: annoyed music: Only Hope (Mandy Moore)
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So I guess it is about time for me to make one of these considering everyone in the alliance and my close-knit circle of friends has this fucking thing. Anyway, my life as it were breeds faggotry and in turn, turns my friends onto other people so in short, i will always end up alone. Thus my life ends. I am older than dirt to quote the BFF: Mr. Cranch. PS...I am all washed up and i am only 18. Question Mark? Okay i must intervene...faggotry is beginning! |
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| Finally! |
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| 03:53am 01/02/2004 |
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So I guess it is about time for me to make one of these considering everyone in the alliance and my close-knit circle of friends has this fucking thing. Anyway, my life as it were breeds faggotry and in turn, turns my friends onto other people so in short, i will always end up alone. Thus my life ends. I am older than dirt to quote the BFF: Mr. Cranch. PS...I am all washed up and i am only 18. Question Mark? Okay i must intervene...faggotry is beginning! |
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