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Tuesday, September 2nd, 2003
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9:00p - poop always wins out over god and king kong
so this friendster thing that everyone is so hip to... (or should that be "to which everyone is so hip?") i put off getting anywhere near it for two reasons:
1) i didn't want any old high school chums to look me up and try and re-acquaint and
2) i didn't know anybody who was into it and i didn't want to be the lame loser with no friends.
But now i know that there are people that i know; so, i tried it and it's fucking AWESOME. through like 6 people i have a gazillion strangers in my gallery/circle/whatever. it makes me feel super popular. oh, and after reading the profiles and stuff, i'm come to the conclusion that my friends are fucking hilarious. and awesome. not as fucking hilarious and awesome as i am, naturally, but that's hard to do, really.
and speaking of me--*i* totally am hilarious. why haven't any of you assholes told me that before? dollars to doughnuts i am one of the funniest fucking people you know. oooh, i get it. it's because i say things like "dollars to doughnuts," isn't it? DAMMIT!!! also, i think i make too much use of punctuation marks. have you ever noticed that? some fuck brought it to my attention that i used 40 parantheticals in my profile. i mean shit...look back at this crappy email i just wrote. it's what, 200 words long and i've used one set of parentheses, one ellipsis two colons, one semi-colon (and who the fuck uses semi-colons anyway...oh, crap, that's two sets of parenthese...shit and two ellipses, crap, three ellipses! okay, four ellipses plus that one i forget in the middle of this paragraph), two slashes, a couple of hyphens, way too many exclamation points and 30-something commas. roudn it off with the periods, the apostrophes and that dash and i am such a retard and i can't believe anyone has read this far into the email. if you're still reading, stop because there is nothing interesting to come.
except that there is another soccer game tonight and i've been sowing the seeds of malcontent with the players today. by this afternoon, the menfolk of HLIS Capital Markets will be seething with hatred for those cocksuckers in Control Assurance and after they eat some red meat for dinner my plan will come to fruition. after 20 years, my father will rest--there will be blood tonight!
"i'll say it was self-defense--who's the jury gonna believe, me or a dead bear?"
current music: dolour
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