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Saturday, June 5th, 2004
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4:55p - AGHz & ERGz!!!!!!!!
Okay, so I've figured out that once you find out what you REALLY want, its a hell
of a lot harder to get it, even though it seemed so easy to get before. I think
its just that part about getting nervous and thinking you're going to screw everything
up really badly and ruin the rest of your life trying to get this one thing. Why
that is, I have NOOOO idea. Maybe its everybody standing in your way. Maybe its
your own self procrastinating... I think I'm getting into a depressed mood...that
could be bad...I just....I feel awful about quite a few things, but then there's
always that one thing or person thats just...there, making everything that much
better!
But then again, sometimes, that one thing gets ruined in matter of seconds, and either you become closer to it and more protective of it, or, you just want to give up on life and totally screw everything you have going for yourself. Right now, I'm not sure where I stand in that situation, but I...I'm just upset... people think I'm being a total snob about going to LCC and everything, but seriously, they have it so much better than me!!! I'm leaving everything I've ever really known to go to some place where I know....no one... sorry it pisses people off, but I'd rather have a positive attitude about these kinda things!!!!! AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I cant write anymore, I'm in a weird mood....depressed and anxious and happy and messed up all at the same time is NOT FUN! i need to see people....umm....hmm....maybe i should...no....ill do it sooner or later tho...itll go public!!!
current mood:  blah
current music: Britney Spears: Everytime (comment on this)
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