| Racking it in |
[07 Jul 2003|09:44pm] |
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mood |
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 accomplished |
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| [ |
music |
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DJ Lhasa - Giulia |
] |
At this point I'm knocking on all the wood I can possibly find in fear that the littlest thing will go wrong for me. I don't think I could afford it. For once I'm on a roll, and for one of the first times ever I actually feel like I'm invincible. I'm actually gonna succeed in SOMETHING. I've always felt like such a failure but who's fault is that? My own I guess. Then again I've never had encouragement or motivation. Never once got patted on the back from my parents. Did you know that I went through almost all of highschool without showing them a report card? They were so caught up in their own selfish selves and their so called 'problems' that half the world has been through in order to care. How things will be different with my children. Believe you me, I will care.
My business is slowly starting up. I figure if I'm twenty now, then by the time I'm 25 it should be booming. It will. When it comes to management and strategy I'm good at it. Plus I come from a family with a big marketing and real estate background so I was brought up in that end of the water. I've finally put myself into something I'm definately confident in.
We've already started looking at plans on how we're going to fix up the basement. We're taking a portion of it for my esthetics, knocking down a couple of walls to open up space, adding a sink and some piping, and of course some carpeting and what not to make it cozy. In the meantime I'm going to be building myself a clientel while I work weekends only, and then working at a daycare during the week. The way I look at it is that I'm taking care for a whole bunch of kids with mothers walking in and out a couple of times a day. I recruit the mothers and their friends. At the same time my aunt who works just down the street at her very own hairdressing business will promote for me as well. I know a couple of owners at restaurants and clothing stores whom I know would be more than happy to give out my business cards and pricelists. I'm not worried about clients one bit. I just can't wait to get it started. It'll be something that 'I' started from scratch. Something 'I' worked for. Something that will help me tremendously in the future and something that will definately benefit my children when the time comes.
Everything I do from now on is to ensure my future. You can't count on anybody anymore. You can't count on the 'richman' to take care of you and the kids. Somehow you seem to get fucked over that way. This world is insane today. Divorce is killing it. I think for myself. I think of the worst possible situation where I would have to support my whole family myself. Hope to God it would never come to that, but you can never be too careful or safe.
Other than that, My mouna hasn't come back home yet :( I cried in bed last night. I've been crying a lot lately. I guess I'm on some sort of emotional low. I can get like that sometimes... it starts off with the simplest thing and then all of a sudden everything is bothering me. I just wish my kitten would come back to me but I know deep down she won't... *sigh* My baby...
This is gonna be a real busy summer... heh actually, it's going to be constantly busy from now on. I better say my prayers. I need all the strength and drive possible. I didn't take a freaking aeshetics course to work at a salon for minimum wage!
No
Fucking
Way
!
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