5:00AM
Well, some skanky bitch I have never met or heard of before somehow got my journal, and my friend's abusive, sadistic ex-boyfriend reads this thing. How very sad for you people: can't you find something less pathetic to do with your lives than snoop up on people who are, always have been, and always will be far superior to you in every concievable way? *sigh. Well, anyway. If you want my new journal and don't already have it, email me: morbidgoddess@hotmail.com SPAM ME AND YOU DIE!!!
Well, I made a new friend today. I was at the park and this guy walked up and we started talking about music and school and pot and (?) r-p games. Then some of his friends showed up and we all said we'd hang out later. So Zack and I went and got Ellie and Joseph and hung out with Mark and Mason for a while. Then I hung out with Ellie and Joseph at the park later. Pretty dull day, but I made a new friend (or something) whose friend basically told me that he wants to fuck my brains out and that he has coke. My friend really wants to get some, so we'll just have to see how this works out. Well, I am over at Ellie's again tonight and we are waiting for her abusive ex-boyfriend to come tap at her window and try to rape her or kill her or something. Well, that dude I met today just knocked on Ellie's front door and her mom answered. Um, hello? I just met you six hours ago, and this is my FRIEND'S house, and it's kinda late (well, not really, but dark anyway). Hello? That is rather odd. I think Zach must like me. Ha--he's Italian. ITALIAN!! (OK, well, that may not be that funny, but who cares.) Damn, I should shut the hell up and start finding and working on a monologue. There is an audition I really want to go to on Sunday--a bunch of people wrote in stories about their most memorable times in town, or something like that, and they are going to make a miniseries about it or something. This could mean work for wee little Jane! Well, who knows, I'll probably be back with more later. If not, soon.
Grr... I am so tired. This morning I had to get up before 8 to leave Ellie's so she could go to the stupid school orientation bullshit. So, I went home and slept until one or so and then she came over and we went to Joseph's. Then we did pretty much nothing all freakin' day. Eh, oh well. Well, good news, Chris, my mom said sometime next week we'd drive (ugh) up to Lubbock so she could see her friends and so I could see you. Sweet! Now I just have to figure out where to stay while I'm in town. I sure as hell don't want to stay in some shitty hotel with my mom--won't it be enough to have to drive with her for 7 hours? *sigh* I hope you appreciate this, Chris. See what I go through for you? Wow nobody is online. All you people suck! Ha, all, like, three people I ever talk to online. Man, stupid school starts on the 19th. I'm not even in high school anymore, but I still have to get up before 9 every morning to make it to campus on time. I should get a fucking job. I am tired of relying on my parents for money and shit, but....dammit, getting a job is so much WORK. Ha ha. With the economy up the pope's ass the way it is, job markets are shit anyway. What chance does a 17 year old with no real previous work experience have? (If you said slim to none, you're right! Congratulations! You win....a cookie! Well, not really...) And I will not, I repeat, NOT work in some shithole like HEB or whatever where I have to wear some goddamn slacks and a fucking polo. Hell, any uniform at all sucks balls. Poo on a stick. Well, I'm all out of rants for now. (I wonder how long THAT will last...)
Blah. Not much going on right now. I have to go poopies! Tra la la... listening to Letters to Cleo right now-that and Jack off Jill. I have new Hello Kitty undies! Joseph got them for me at Gadzooks with his giftcard thingie from about 3 years ago. Plus, I have a cute Snow White shirt and YES, it has dwarves on it. PIMP. Tee hee hee! I wish i knew how to upload a picture of me onto the net but, well, see... I have no digital camera and I am LAZY. I just feel like I almost have a modicum of self-esteem right now. Heh, how odd... Well, went to my stupid shrink again today and told him i stopped all my damn meds last week and I don't plan on taking any for a while. I have been on medication for so long now that I don't even know what myself is anymore. I probably won't like it much. Well, that could just be my "poor self-image" talking. Who knows. I'm at Ellie's and her air conditioning is STILL not fixed and I am super hot-style. Ha, I just remembered that there is this kiosk in Lakeline (yes, I HATE malls, but I went anyway to use up some stupid gift cards etc...) and it is called... get this: "Asian Trendy Zone." For some inexplicable reason that struck me as oddly hilarious. I cracked up and laughed my ass off in the middle of the food court. Those crazy Asians... It is so super-hot style in here! Dammit. Hmm...it seems I am out of soda...this is a conundrum, to say the least.... OK, no more worries. I got more! Yippee skippy! Of course, Ellie's mom came into the kitchen and I am not wearing any pants... that was strange and somewhat awkward....but I got another Dr. Pepper, so all is well.
Like just 4% of the population, I am an EXPERIMENTER (Dominant Introvert Abstract Thinker ). "Although you're slightly shy, you love control. When a problem comes in your way, you stomp on it swiftly and decisively. You are bothered easily by failure in others and failure in yourself. You don't like people that you don't think are intelligent. Rather than arguing with them, however, you would just as soon ignore them altogether. In relationships, you have a strong heart. And because you're introverted, people take you as someone they can trust. But the fact is that in addition to solving problems, you like to create them. So there's a decent chance that you'll cheat on a loved one. If you do, you'll likely get away with it."
You are the typical
feminist, depressed, artist.
You go against the crowd
and do everything you
can to be different.
Too bad noone notices.
