you know .. i've done so much complaining about being so alone and not feeling complete, that i've totally looked over all the people that are there for me and mean so much. I guess i've grown a lot since this summer, and everything that has gone on. I'm glad i am where i am, and the fact that i was able to pick myself back up and actually have people who are there for me through everything. People i know i can count on and go to, people who won't turn me away because it's petty or stupid or because they think it means nothing.
In the past i had nowhere to go, and noone i felt i could talk to about anything because i didn't think they would want to listen. I was unhappy, but i was happy. EVeryone would come to me and i would be glad to help, and i still am, but i had noone to listen to me. It feels really amazing to actually turn around and have a give and take relationship, that two way street that i've never been on before. I'm not saying the people i was friends with didn't love me, or want to help .. i just think they didn't know how. Or maybe im being a little too nice and giving a little too much leeway, and they just didn't care. All they cared about was themselves. It's funny to look back and realize all the people you thought were your best friends, and people you thought would always be there for you... people who never were, but you always thought it was because it wasn't a good time. and it's funny to look back, and realize that the people you never expected to grow close with, would be the people that would always be there for you. people who would love you unconditionally and for who you really were.
Through my entire four years in high school, i've had one friend who was always there for me through everything, one person who i knew would never leave my side and was always willing to listen and give me advice. It feels awesome to look back and know that i had just one person i've known for so long who has never left me and i know never will. And despite the fact that at times we're not always close, or we're not always together, we're always together in spirit. Sandra is like a sister to me, and im so glad that i've had one person who knows it all and still loves me for me.
It's the people who come into your life unexpectedly that leave a lasting impression on your heart and soul forever. Considering the fact that she's my ex boyfriends, girlfriend and we're grown so close so fast will always leave a lasting impression. She's the girl i can go to when i need a good laugh or someone to listen to me. She has been there for me through so many rough times during the summer and during the beginning of the year and she has never ever left my side. She knows it all. She has always had my back, even when i may have been wrong and had stood by me. Nikki is one of my best friends ever, and i don't know what i would do without her in my life! She can always make me laugh, and we have the wackiest conversations, and it feels like we've known each other forever! and hopefully we go to the same college and room together =D
Eric and i were always friends, but i never thought that he and i could get so close, and i would come to depend on him and love him like a brother. He's like a big brother to me, and he's always there for me and i know he always has my back. He's able to make me smile and laugh and always lends a helping hand and a ear when i need to talk. He gives me lasting advice and im really glad that he's there for me.
Maggi. What's there to say about this girl? I never ever thought that her and i would become the best of friends. She is like my sister. We've gotten immensely close in the past two months, and shes ALWAYS there for me. We have the funniest conversations, and we always have a good time together with everything. She's there if i need to cry, and i need a shoulder to lean on. She confides in me her all, and i do the same to her. She's like a sister to me and im so glad that i have someone like her in my life. I've never thought that i would find someone i could confide my all in and love me for who i am. I know when i go off to college that our friendship will remain strong. She's my other half, and i don't know what i would do without her.
The past months have made me realize who my true friends are, and who is always going to be there for me. Sandra, Nikki, Maggz and Eric are my bestest ever! I love them with all my heart<3 I've grown to love so many different people. New people that i never thought i would hang out with or even become close with. Raylen, Jon, Junior, David, Rohan, Lauren, Chris, Justine .. etc etc. I love you with all my heart, and you guys rock my world forever and ever! Never forget<33