Blurty for whiskey dream.
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| Wednesday, January 19th, 2005 |
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last 17 jan 2005, monday 1030am #1 my favorite aunt is leaving the country. i never realized how sad that would make me feel until i woke up last monday morning and read my first text message for the day: i'm leaving on thursday (though *deep breath* she just told me a few minutes ago that her flight was moved to feb 6). straight forward with no frills. much like her. she's the kind of person that doesn't really appreciate glitz. she wears jeans and shirts to most of the places she goes to. she never got married. she's good with people, kids especially. she was the one who taught me how to read, made me watch sesame street, made mud clay figures in the drizzle with me, made wooden boats with leaf sails and accompanied me to the once-clean creek at the back of our house to sail them downriver. she's the aunt who helps me clean my room (even til now when i can't stand the mess anymore). we've argued over the years. the first slap i ever got growing up was from her.... and in retrospect, i pretty much deserved it. (i was the classic demon teen daughter/niece/sister.) she found my pregnancy test (negative ok?) and sat me down and talked to me about it. no judgment. just concern. i lied through my teeth. we've talked until the wee hours about the most mundane things, about our dysfunctional family, aging parents, grandparents, my crushes (minus any torrid details), why i stopped going to church, ( why she gave up her life for us.... ) last 17 jan 2005, monday 300pm #2 cost-cutting? my boss doesn't like me. there is a danger there. but i'd rather not jump the gun. but there was a solid statement said. i don't even want to think about it. i just hate her so much right now. too many of us trusted her but apparently she has no empathy, no understanding of what is happening to her group. i'm not asking for a friendship or even friendliness here. i'm asking for guts, for leadership. we're not just email addresses or such. stop sending us emails and posting goddamn memos on the wall. ( tell us!!! ) last 17 jan 2005, monday late pm #3 How You Remind Me Never made it as a wise man I couldn't cut it as a poor man stealing Tired of living like a blind man I'm sick of sight without a sense of feeling And this is how you remind me This is how you remind me Of what I really am This is how you remind me Of what I really am It's not like you to say sorry I was waiting on a different story This time I'm mistaken for handing you a heart worth breaking and I've been wrong, i've been down, been to the bottom of every bottle these five words in my head scream "are we having fun yet?" yeah, yeah, yeah, no, no yeah, yeah, yeah, no, no it's not like you didn't know that I said I love you and I swear I still do And it must have been so bad Cause living with me must have damn near killed you And this is how, you remind me Of what I really am This is how, you remind me Of what I really am --------------------------------- i always read the cards wrong. +) |
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Blurty for whiskey dream.
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