||[ my best friend - tim mcgraw ]
Recap of another night with the man:
As I already posted , I ended up playing cards with Eric , his roomate Mark , and their friend Maureen. Drunk Krystal + Card Game = Bad News! I almost got sick from the Hawaiian Punch ( when a girl says that she doesn't like sugary drinks , no matter how tipsy she may or may not be , take her word for it! ) , but otherwise , the game was without error.
Drunk Mark ate a moth off the porch. If I was sober , I would have either kicked him or gotten sick. It's grossing me out now , since I can picture it minus the solace of my beer goggles.
Eric and I had another serious conversation. I'm suprised and excited with the way things are going between us. I was a little saddened by the turns of the convo , though. I was trying to explain why he is the reason that I am settled in to this relationship ( the fact that he acts in ways that no other man has ever tried with me ), but he didn't understand.
Me: You aren't like other guys.
Him: I'm just a regular guy.
Me: No , if you were , I wouldn't want to be with you.
Him: I'm average.
Me: You aren't average. Average is boring.
Him: Normal then.
Me: You aren't normal , you are different.
Him: I don't want to be different. I've always been different , and I've always wanted to be normal.
We were sober by this time. The two of us never actually openly talked about his problem ( I see no need to bring it up , and he hasn't yet. We'll cross that bridge when the time comes , no? ) , but I have a feeling that the conversation will come up soon. That was probably the closest we have ever been. He's already told me about the development problem with his feet , and that was completely not akward. He spoke objectively , as if his body weren't actually his body. I think that was to gauge my reaction for the other converstaion , the one that I am secretly dreading. I can't say that I didn't notice , because that would be a lie.
I didn't know how to reply to that ( smoothie that I am ) so I rubbed his back and told him that he was better than normal. He looked sad. I wish I could help him somehow , but I can't. He can't help himself until he learns that maybe he can't change everything or anything about himself , but that maybe there is someone out there ( aka ME ) who can and does accept him as a person and a man.