*== Vivienne ==*'s Blurty Entries [entries|friends|calendar] *== Vivienne ==* [ website | My Website ] [ userinfo | blurty userinfo ] [ calendar | blurty calendar ]

??? [15 Dec 2004|06:52pm] [ mood | sleepy ] [ music | Steriogram - Walkie Talkie Man ] Well, this months been eventful. I'm writting this out of boredom....why else really? I havent slept now for oooh....28 hrs which, is pussy really IF i was on a night out or something similar but i'm not. I'm trying to work my body clock back to normal coz spending all those nights at the lads has seriously fucked me up. We seem to just stay up all night scaring ourselves to death, talking shit and not sleeping. I havne't been drinking anything reacently either. For like months actually. There are reasons, well one big reason but thats gone now sadly :o( I spose it means i can drink again, but i don't really want to. Havent seen Bluez for a while. Last time i saw him was last week, which is a long time for me. I got a final call for a part in a film which i totally blanked out for various reasons. I'm still deciding on whether to move out or not. I want to, but if things fuck im i'll be screwed. It will be cool to move out tho, you've gotta move out some time and i think im ready now. I could got into more depth about it but to be honest, i cant be arsed! Well, im fucked so im gonna go to bed x post comment

~*~*Film Star or Porn star?*~*~ [03 Nov 2004|10:21pm] Well, these last few days have been eventful to say the least. Today i did some fetish wear modeling for an underground porn shop which was so fun. I got free dildos and condoms haha. Last night Twist asked me to star in his new porno movie. I said no so if he can't find anyone he'll do it and ill film it. I didn't got to film college for nothing. Also i got my script for the film im auditioning for. If i get this part i've gotta fly out to Miami for 5 days. It's not bad but i'd prefer to go back to LA. Other that that i've really done fuck all. Nothing really to write in here so. Goodbye x post comment

*== BlUrY ==* [08 Sep 2004|07:22pm] [ mood | calm ] [ music | Inner city (Alter-8 mix) - Let it reign ] Well, what will i be doing tonight? Wont be seeing Martin :o( but me and Natty will just drag him to the gig at The Links tomorrow night. Still thinking of Floofs...grr, damn that guy! So love him but hes so pissing me off right now! Ah well, tonight with Natty will be amazing as always. Love that girl! ;o) My uncles been asked to go and work for another company so now he's moving to Miami! Unlucky really! Not about the job, thats cool, hes must be a good photographer if people want him to work for them but moving from LA to Miami, DAMN! I hated leaving LA :o( Oooh, i got a job with a photographer in London :oD It's only helping him out for a few days on location with some bands but its still gonna be fucking wicked! If ya reading this and ya wanna know who, check out his site: http://www.michaelwilliams.co.uk/ Plus, Twist and me are gonna see if we can get an interview with Keith Flint from The Prodigy on the 18th. Seen as how we're seeing him at The Fez, was Twists idea and i'm just going along with it. Wish us luck! :oD oxoxo post comment

== *London's finest Queens* == [25 Jun 2004|07:01pm] [ mood | cheerful ] [ music | Scissor Sisters - Laura ] Only less than 1 week to go until Duty's new club night opens. I cant wait!!! It's gonna be wicked. I'm staying with Pete in a hotel somewhere in London but im not sure where. He told me but i can't remember. It will be fun wherever it is! I bought a new jacket today for the opening. It's amazing; black with pink trim and it comes down past my hips. It's fitted too so it just looks amazing. I've customed an S.D.L skirt too :os......but it looks really nice. ive cut out a big panel in the front so u can see my legs through the mesh. Anyone that customises a piece of S.D.L clothing has to know what theyre are doing, and i do! I'm a designer nof christ sake! I was gonna design and make my own skirt but i wont have the time because i've gotta sort out new jobs, money and the shoot with the photographer. Luckily Michael (the photographer) is in L.A right now until July 15th so thats out of the way for a while. Can't wait till he comes back though and i can do some shoots. Also i'm quitting my job at the café where i work. I'm getting so sick of it and traveling there takes the piss. Now that the college has closed for the summer the bus won't be running to Farnborough so ill be fucked really. I've got an interview tomorrow at Claires Accesories. Christ! I still havent mailed Tim (Tasty Tim) those pictures, i promised him i'd do it about 2 weeks ago :oS Well, i've been busy! I hope that Dusty introduces me to Boy George at her night. Haven't seen him for....well ever! I used to fancy the fuck out of him when i was a kid. Not anymore mind..still. Well, Tom will be here in 1/2 hr so i'd better sort my clothes out. Hmm....legwarmers or no legwarmer? Ah well....whatever i chose ill look cool. Ha, i'm such a bighead.....or just honest? I got a hair appointment at Toni and Guy today with Stacy...she can sort out the drunken mess of a hair cut that claire did. I should hopefully be all ready for the big drag night out in July. xoxox post comment

== *PARTY IN THE CLUB *== [11 Apr 2004|11:24pm] [ mood | indescribable ] [ music | Wumpscut - Torn skin ] Ok, at the moment im speachless over Dusty's AMAZING single launch party at Ghetto in London. So....as im lost for words and the only ones i can come out with are: WOW! FANTASTIC! AMAZING, BRILLIANT and just :o0 here are a few sites you can check the party out on: www.scene-out.com (but you have to be a member to see the photos in full) www.markusinteractive.com/clubs/babe2/ and if u know me personally you can get more pictures from me. post comment

*== Single Launch ==* [05 Apr 2004|11:34pm] [ mood | depressed? ] [ music | Rachel Stamp - I wanna be your doll ] Well, the days finally come. Tomorrow is Dustys single launch! Can't bloody wait! It will be purely amazing. It's from 7pm till 8am so i gonna be fucked but it's worth it. The actually event finishes at 2am but seen as how we're on the VIP list, we're just gonna hang with Dusty and others till we decide to shoot. Claire and i went shopping today and got MORE u.v stuff including t-shirts, nail varnish and raver whistles! After Claire and me had been shopping we went back to hers and talked about tomorrow, times and places etc. I'm still trying to get an appointment at the salon so i can sort out my hair. My mom asked me today because she was wondering what i was gonna do with it for tomorrow night but i just told her that im wearing a wig so i really dont need to worry. After Claire and i had finished at her house we went to the pub and saw Griff (grr, dont like him!) but we avoided him. He was flirting with a girl Claire doesn't like, so i don't like her either! She's been a cunt to Claire so fuck her really. Then fucking Ed text me telling me he's horny and 'can i help him' so i confronted him (over text hmm?) about cheating on Joe! He said it was bollocks but i know it's not coz Ed's a cock. I saw Joe today with Dan and it turns out they're seeing each other (WOO HOO!!!) Two people who truely deserve each other! I think im in love with Joe but ah well....lol...hes gay and i'm a fag hag so it kinda figures. At the pub i saw a guy who i thought i liked but it turned out that he was quite rough when the light hit him; can't be doing with that! Met Mutley who i havent seen for about 6 months :o) so that was bloody good! We played pool and chatted for a while then he offered to give me a lift home (well, i asked but same thing) So he gave me a lift home. When we got to mine we were talking in the car for about 20mins and then we drove to my new house because he wanted to see it and then we drove back and sat and spoke for a further 1/2 hr. He told me something that i had also been previously told: I have depression. Kinda figures really with the way i've been feeling this past month. He's got depression too and has been described to these 'stronger than prozac' pills. Jordan also told me i sounded depressed and he has it too :os oh dear! We'll im not gonna go slashing my wrists about it...who the fuck does that anyway? Ah well, shit happens. Just looking forward to seeing Dusty tomorrow! No one has heard her new single yet (hence the 'single launch') cant wait!!!! Ghetto will be full of drag queens and pretty men (ahhh....beauty) Gonna see if i can get some numbers ;o) and put my hand up a few skirts (oooh yes!!) post comment

*== Madness ==* [23 Mar 2004|12:06pm] [ mood | Wanna go home! ] [ music | Ultrabeat - Pretty green eyes ] Ok, how fun is this? Im sitting in college with a group of trendies looking over at me (i think they can hear my drum and bass coming from my headphones) But...god! I hate it when people watch over me. Reminds me of my dad *shudders* Should be moving out bloody soon too thank fuck! We have to move in to the new house before the end of the month which is cool coz the sooner the bloody better. It'll be great when we move in though. Just me, mom, my brother Mike and my sister Hannah. NO DAD!!! YESSSSS!!! Fucking result! And lets face it, Hannah will be at school all the time, Mike will be out like he is ALL DAY, EVERY DAY and my mom will be at work most of the time....FREE HOUSE!!! I can do what i want, when i want without my dad hanging around having a go and putting me down the whole time! But anyway; onto something a bit better............. Fuck the weirdest thing happened last night. I've knowen this bloke called Thom for a bit. Ok, didn't know him....just knew of him, ya know? Anway, i got his email address of his band website and added him to my msn. I hate it when people do that to me but it's an exception coz everytime he sees me he comes over and says hi, so its ok. So i added him and we were talking and turns out he lives in Fleet. Kinda guessed anyway coz he was in town the other day and lets face it, if you live in fleet and you go upto town, the only reason youre doing that is coz you're a posh twat who wants to food shop, youre a complete pikey/trendie and youre whole life revolves around hanging outside Mc Donalds trying to look 'phat'. You're a school kid and you just wanna get out of the house (but some of them are the 'phat macy d's 'cru') Or in mine and Claire case last week you have no money and you're bored shitless. Well, i was talking to him and he asked me where i lived and i said Kings road. He was like 'Dude, i live down Guildford road' which is like right opposite my road. So before you know it he's round my house. We had such a cool time watching 'House on Haunted Hill' even though we were like taking the whole way through. It was so cool though coz we just gelled so well :o) We've agreed to share a tent at reading coz hes got no one to go with and i do but i'd rather not go in a big group coz i have this social disorder thingy where i feel left out and shit....its crap so i usually just walk off on my own. His tickets in the post, all i gotta do is order mine. He was supposed to be meeting me today but he hasnt txt back so i think il just catch him tonight. Last night i did something scarey but something that i think needed to be done. I finally told Jordan i liked him....after liking him for months and the amazing thing is he likes me back! :oD I kinda knew coz its obvious and Monika said he did too and shes always right about things like that. I duno what to do know though :oS ill just speak to him tonight and see what happens. I've been trying to get him to come to reading festival but he wont...damn him! I gotta admit the music isn't my thing but as long as there are drum and bass, jungle and hard house tents then ill be fine. Ah well...ill have fun with Thom...hehehe...drinking competitions hahaha...YES!! Im so gonna loose coz im a fucking lightweight but ah well. I also got a txt from Claire while i was in my music lesson and shes invited me away for the weekend. Just me and her at her dads house in Dorset. I think thats where he lives anyway.....nowhere to glamerous but no matter where we are Claire and i always seem to make a day out of it and just have loadsa fun! post comment

*== little baby ==* [09 Mar 2004|01:11pm] [ mood | worried ] [ music | Rammstein's kraftwerk mix - Stripped ] Ha! It's official, im a complete dick! I knew i should have fucked Ben.....now i think im pregnant and so do most of the people in work and i havent even told them :os I gotta take a test tomorrow just to make sure but im pretty sure i am. I didnt even think about it at 1st and then what Kathy said properly shit me up. I was at work the other day and i was telling Becky about me throwing up and eating really fucking odd stuff and how knackered i was and she asked if i was pregnant and i just laughed and told her to fuck off. The i was in the kitchen working with Kathy and i told her about this new food id found was really nice and i would never have thought about it before and she just came out with 'are you pregnant?' i said no and she said 'you must be if youre eating stuff like that' i just laughed and walked away then later i was speaking to Mark and i just came out with it. it all makes perfect sense though. The stuff im eating, the puking, the way i feel (tired and worn out) and the emotional shit with it...that sucks the most! if i am i'll be 6 weeks gone this saturday. I've worked it all out, if im not then thats fine but if i am i have a realistic plan and a 'want' plan. The realistic plan is to have a termination. I'm not gonna tell my folks ill do it on my own, ill just do it with Becky like i was gonna do it with her but then she decided to keep it. My 'want' plan is to go back to L.A or Vegas and stay with family and have it there. There is really only one member of my family that i know will stand by me throughout and thats my uncle...'mr photographer' I love him, he's so great and he's always been there for me...i tell him stuff i wouldnt dream of telling my mom EVER! Even if my life depened on it! Raine said if its negative we'll go to Vegas and she'll marry me in celebration lol..thing is....i could so easily marry her lol. It's just the thing to do. I'd love to have a kid but theres so much i wanna do like travel and i cant do that with a kid. I wanna have one but i dont at the same time...its too confussing. I'm not gonna fret until ive found out for sure and thats what me and Natty are gonna do tomorrow. In other events work has been taking the piss a bit. Not the place its self, just the people that come in and buy stuff. I work at a cafe and its a Christan place. Now im not religious at all but i can understand and respect other peoples beliefs but some people really go to fucking far! Last week on the Thursday i was working 11am - 2.30pm and we needed take away cups for the coffee so the people send stuff down from the stock room but the lids they sent with them didnt fit. I went over and told Kathy (boss lady) and the woman sitting next to her said to me in THE most patronising way 'you'll just have to get your praying mat out and pray for them wont you' I mean WHAT THE FUCK???? What is this woman on? And does she know who she's talking to? I just felt like telling her to fuck off but then i though...well if shes being serious i might offend her but then she has offended me and plus id loose my job. I was just in one of those really fucked off moods where i hated everyone that day, esspecially her! Christians are scarey i think...ok, not them as such but the religion. Take this for instance: 'For god loved us so much he sacrificed his only son, now whoever worships him will not perish but live an eternal life' thats basically saying (from my point of view) if youre not worshiping the christianity faith you will more than likely burn in hell! Nice! Also whats all this bullshit about not judging and giving people chances? When i 1st went for my interview 6 months ago before i started working for them they accused me of being a fucking satanist! I mean come on for fucks sake! Yeeeah.....i can see me looking like a satanist with, lets see.....electric blue hair, black flared cyber jeans, 4inch swear platforms, uv plastic spongey rings and a black velvet jacket....hmm yeeeah the satanism ooozes from me! They keep, or i should i say kept trying to get me to dye my hair a nice brown/reddy brown or blonde (kinda what my mom wants) but they have given up on me totally now. I still get the 'tone down youre makeup' and 'take out the nose ring' but i dont see why that should be a problem either. Nearly all the people who i've served in that shop have complimented me on my 'lovely blue hair...such a lovely bright colour' and 'oooh you look like cleopatra with youre eye makeup...it's wonderful' THEY LOVE ME! hahaha well i dunno about that. No one has ever said....'oh i dont like it' if they dont like it they havent said anything or just havent even thought about it. Hmmm...i gotta go to lesson now..all fun! NOT! post comment

*== movie star ==* [04 Mar 2004|09:04am] [ mood | Fucking knackered ] [ music | Apoptygma Bezerk - Assimilate ] Hmm its 9.05am in the morning and im at college....fuck it sucks to be me right now! Im knackered. Didn't get home from the recording studio till 10pm last night and i was just being constantly pissed off by Tom (well everybody was) thinking hes fucking perfect and ordering everyone around. I don't like being ordered around...esspecially by fucking 16 year olds so just to totally fuck him off i gave him shit back, which he totally didn't expect. It was ok by the end of the night though. Everyone decided to just be nice to Tom.....so they didnt speak to him hahaha....ah well! I've got lesson in 20mins and it's guaranteed i will fall to sleep in this lesson, christ i almost fel to sleep on alex last night but only coz i was monged. We did some recording then went for a spliff (which i said i'd stop but i suppose the odd 1-off is ok) and i got back in to the studio and just died! I gotta see Griff soon, i havent seen him for like 2 weeks, nor Gareth. I'm starting to like Griff more than just friends hes was cool girly Griff and now hes WOW Giff. Weird how your opinion of someone can change when you havent seen them for ages. Maybe it's true what they say; absence makes the heart grow fonder.......hahaha fuck that! Gotta work at 11am then look after the kids. They crack me up...bless them. They've totally changed my view on life. Before i started looking after them, 2 years ago i hated kids. I liked the odd 1 or 2 that i looked after but James and Jonathan are just so great! Theye 14 (James) and 11(Jon) and we have so much fun when i look after them. I want two boys when im a bit older just so i can watch them fight and place bets on who's gonna win hahaha! CLASS! Fuck! 15 mins till lesson and i bet no one will turn up. On Tuesday 3 people were in lesson (not including me coz i couldnt be arsed to go) Ah well! Gonna make propper use of my camera tonight....take videos and lots of pics of....ME! hahaha and my cat (obviously) Bunny wants me to film a porno. Dunno how long my video time lasts but im not doing it for him, his gf can. Fuuuuuck im bored! post comment

*== Lights, camera, action ==* [03 Mar 2004|04:46pm] [ mood | artistic ] [ music | The 69 eyes - Sleeping with Lions ] Todays been a cool day so far! I just went to college and had a surprisingly ok lesson (mike helped by cracking me up every chance he got...gotta love that guy!) and the lesson finished early so i went to town praying my money had gone into my bank and IT HAD! I got my digital camera and then went to work to see the guys. Work's cool coz when you have free time you can just go and see everyone...love that cafe! I went at 1pm and left at 4pm coz i gotta be at the recording studio at 5 (10 mins) I was attacking everyone with my camera and playing their vids back to them. While i was doing this they were all slagging off Kathy lol..ah well. Tonight ill be in my fucking element, a camera all to myself with a memory and auto upload....fucking nice! Right..its 4.55pm, better go to the studio coz i dont wanna be late, it will ruin my reputation for being fashionably late but feck it! post comment

*==Fear and Loathing==* [02 Mar 2004|12:48pm] [ mood | bitchy ] [ music | Synical - Coke Whore ] Fuck what a month its been..group sex with punks and hermaphrodites (only the once) bent cops, illegal parties, trannies killing people, way to much drugs for one nose to handle and thats just in 2 weeks. The rest..well the rest is a blur really! I've been trying to get myself of the drugs and surprisingly its working. I feel like shit mind but i can breath now without feeling any pain. Gotta go back to L.A though coz i cant handle the party scene in England; its shit! I need to go back to the party monsters and i NEED to be able to get away with murder! I think im gonna go back to Las Vegas in the summer with Raine. I'm dieing to go and i think she is too. She misses New York and I miss Las Vegas and L.A. I've left some stuff in L.A so i gotta go back and get that anyway its just a matter of when really. We've been talking about it as if its a deffinate thing and i think this time it really is. (The whisky bar needs me) Fuck Hollywood though! I mean it's shit, whats so great about it? NOTHING!!! I'ts just a skanky place with the word 'Hollywood' written on a few walls outside the shops and a big white sign thats (and lets face it) gonna fall down pretty soonish if they keep on stacking that many telegraph poles on it. A few months back when i was there i drove right to the top (well as far as you can go) and i was so shocked to see the electricity poles and pilons. Plus the sign is made from corrogated metal (now who's bright idea was that eh?) Ahh..bliss...i finish college in 4 months then i dont have anymore college EVER! My mom had a good idea last night. She wants me to see if i can get a job in L.A working alongside my uncle. He knows a few photographers and im sure theyre in need of some assistance. I prefer being in front of the camera personally but who else is gonna take on a girl with blue hair other than the photography indsustry? I was gonna see if i could geta job at the funeral place up the road but you need a qualification to embalm corpses. Fuck that, i'm not doing more studying! If not L.A im gonna try in London which i suppose is pretty cool. I think before i go anywhere though i actually gotta find a job. I think im gona take a year out but to do that i need money and if that means working over time in the cafe then ill do it. I think i should start charging Ryan though. I mean he gets more 'oral examination' from me than he does from his dentist. No, his dentist doesnt give him head its just a figure of speach! Ben's still not speaking to me. I dont give a shit really but i cant believe i was used! Ah well....ive done it to enough blokes. Loz has fallen out with him too and i think a few other people have aswell. I still cant believe i fucked him though, christ! Tash too....how did i bring myself to 'carry out sexual acts' with her? Actually, i stopped myself just before i went any further with tash.....i just couldnt do it it was too weird. I did feel like a big of a whore when she asked me what was happening with us...i guess i do have a heart. hmmm.....i thought i lost that when chris died, clearly not! post comment

mmm....wine. [28 Sep 2003|05:53pm] [ mood | pissed off ] I had a killer weekend!!! I went out on friday wth the guys and stayed over Trevs. We got back to his and i was holding his sisters hamster who did a runner behind the sofa. With his sister in panic mode thinking she'd died Tom, Trev, Ash and Ian were holding up the sofa and cutting the bottom open with a knife. We finally rescued her and everything was ok. Then on Saturday i went to Daves (my bassist) for a band rehearsal and i stayed over his. We both got trashed and...well did stuff we shouldnt but shh!!! We also agreed we wanted to be the next Bonnie and Clyde so were gonna be killing lots of usless, wate-of-space people (Nick) and breaking into the old mental institution in Brookwood (but i think we'll leave the robbing banks bit to the real Bonnie and Clyde, was a little easier in those days) We planned all this out after i had finished puking up blood in his bathroom while he was holding me in his arms begging me to live.....all so drunk and dramatic! We woke up this morning next to each other like...'OUCH! my head lol. Im now well hungover and feel like shit hahahaha. Me and Dave wrote a bit of a song today. I wrote all the lyrics and Dave and i came up with a bass line but it was mostly his work, i just suggested some drop-ins. Got another band rehearsal on Thursday and Friday and im well exited :oD On the down side Dave spoke to Nick (my ex) coz he was on my msn and Nick apparently was totally slagging me off and then i read the conversation and i wasnt too impressed. I thought Nick was a nice enough bloke but hes just a cunt. I really hope i never see him again and i couldnt care less if he died tomorrow (seriously) yes im bitter but i dont give a shit.....i think the world would be better without small minded people like him and he has a small cock too. I dumped him because he bored me and he was very annoyingly unopen minded. Personally i hate people like that. post comment

mmm....wine. [28 Sep 2003|05:53pm] [ mood | pissed off ] I had a killer weekend!!! I went out on friday wth the guys and stayed over Trevs. We got back to his and i was holding his sisters hamster who did a runner behind the sofa. With his sister in panic mode thinking she'd died Tom, Trev, Ash and Ian were holding up the sofa and cutting the bottom open with a knife. We finally rescued her and everything was ok. Then on Saturday i went to Daves (my bassist) for a band rehearsal and i stayed over his. We both got trashed and...well did stuff we shouldnt but shh!!! We woke up this morning next to each other like...'OUCH! my head lol. now im well hungover and feel like shit hahahaha. Me and Dave wrote a bit of a song today. I wrote all the lyrics and Dave and i came up with a bass line but it was mostly his work, i just suggested some drop-ins. Got another band rehearsal on Thursday and Friday and im well exited :oD post comment

*Blerrrrg!* [25 Sep 2003|02:15pm] [ mood | excited ] [ music | V Snares...All the children are dead ] Today i wento to college i actually got there on time for once. The teacher was late and i was early...hmmm role reversal. I spoke to Alex and Tom and they were a bit upset coz their mate had killed himself a few days before so i was sitting with them making sure they were ok (loosing a mate is like the hardest thing in the world, its happened to me 4 times:o(. After my lesson i went to meet Ryan and Leigh then me and Ryan went to town and met up with some guys we know. I met my drummer (the new band of Ryans ive joined) and hes so cool. he was cracking me up after 5 mins and apparently hes a bloody good drummer too :o) After that they all had to go back to college :o( so i went to see Dan S and i met up with the other Dan too (bless their gayness) and Dan W has landed himself into some serious shit! Hes on probabation and didnt turn up to it and now faces imprisonment :'o( After speaking to them i just went home which is where i am now just about to have lunch. Just got back from work and im so exited about Saturday. Its my new bands 1st band rehearsal and oooh im just so exited!!! :oD. It's not my band its more Ryans coz he was in it singing and fell out with the guitarist so they all decided to sack him. Ryan decided that instead of just getting a new guitarist he'd find a new singer (me) and take back seat as the new guitarist. I have a feeling its gonna work out really well coz we all get on so well (me and Ryan maybe a little more than two band members should. People actually think we are seeing each other the amount of time we spend together!) Oh well its all good, least we're not killing each other :o) Well im gonna go and watch my new dvd; 'The Shining' post comment

*DEAD* Gary Numan and Rico<3.... *STAR* [23 Sep 2003|07:50pm] [ mood | mellow ] [ music | Skywarp.....604 ] Havent posted anything on here for a few days coz i havent been here. I went shopping in Camden on Sunday and then after that i saw Gary Numan at the Astoria with Bex. It was really good apart from the 1st of Gary Numans set which was fucked up coz his microphone didnt work :o( The support artist couldnt make it coz hes was sick so Rico (who sings on Gary Numans 'Crazier' single) did about 20 mins of DJing which i thought was really nice of him and hes fine too ;o) It was weird, me and Bex were sitting outside the Astoria for 2 hrs and about 1 hr before the gig was gonna start this really gorgeous bloke pulled up next to us in his car with another guy and some DJ equipment in the back of his car. I made it perfectly clear to Bex i liked him by completely loosing my train of thought and speaking complete shit to her while paying most (ok all) of my attention to him. We got into the Astoria and sat down at the back near the bar (obviously) and i saw the gorge guy setting up some equipment and it was just all eyes fixated on him (he is so fine) He left the stage and then came back after about 10 mins. He came back and did some DJing and i shouyed out 'OH MY GOD BEX! THE FIT GUY IN THE CAR WAS RICO!!!' I chose the best moment to to this which had to be when everyone suddenly silenced and could probably hear only me! Christ i pick my moments. I met another Depeche Mode fan YAY!!! Quite a lot older than me though. After that we got back fine expecting to wait over 2 hrs for our next train back to Farnborough and waiting for Bex's mum to pick us up but we managed to get the 11.30 train back to Fleet. Yesterday i dyed my hair blue and its looks really good but because my hair is quite thick i didnt have enough bleach so, now my hairs a mixture of blues lol. It took 4 hrs lol...PAIN!!! I like it though. Ive run out of yellow UV nail varnish :o( Its gone all hard and its not like i can go and get another pot because i got it on Melrose in L.A. I suppose i could just buy yellow and UV but that takes effort lol. Just went to college today to come home and find that Duncan has told Nick (my ex) that i had a new bf Trevor. I actually made him promise he wouldnt coz i knew it would hurt Nick. THANKS DUNCAN!!! 2 comments|post comment

~*~*Strait jackets and Spookyness*~*~ [20 Sep 2003|04:15pm] [ mood | confused ] [ music | Popcorn......Hot Butter ] OH MY GOD! The fucking weirdest thing just happened. Im going to the Manson gig in November with Becky and i had a dream about it last night. I was at the gig at the front and i couldn't find Becky coz she was at the back with a huge green suit case. hmmm, ok. ANYWAY! the weird thing is ahe had the same dream :oS She just e-mailed me on face-pic telling me about a dream she had last night. She said 'We were at the manson gig and we were sitting at the front and you (being me) had a baby' I didn't have a baby in my dream but she had an item in my dream (the suit case) and i had an item in her dream (a baby) random i know but could it mean something. hahahha, ok i sound weird, oh well. Well on a less weirder note im shopping tomorrow in Camden with Ryan and Dave (who will be dressed up in drag so i might have the urge to rape them lol) and Bex. It will be cool. I really need a new corset from cyberdog and a new pair of trousers from there too if i can find any that fit (they have the weirest sizes in there, either too big or too small) I found out one of my friends might be seriously ill so im kinda upset about that but hopefully he'll be ok. If he's not he'll be the fith friend to die :o( so im kinda hoping. Well im bored so im gonna go and watch a video or a DVD or both. post comment

~*~*Strait jackets and Spookyness*~*~ [20 Sep 2003|04:15pm] OH MY GOD! The fucking weirdest thing just happened. Im going to the Manson gig in November with Becky and i had a dream about it last night. I was at the gig at the front and i couldn't find Becky coz she was at the back with a huge green suit case. hmmm, ok. ANYWAY! the weird thing is ahe had the same dream :oS She just e-mailed me on face-pic telling me about a dream she had last night. She said 'We were at the manson gig and we were sitting at the front and you (being me) had a baby' I didn't have a baby in my dream but she had an item in my dream (the suit case) and i had an item in her dream (a baby) random i know but could it mean something. hahahha, ok i sound weird, oh well. Well on a less weirder note im shopping tomorrow in Camden with Ryan and Dave (who will be dressed up in drag so i might have the urge to rape them lol) and Bex. It will be cool. I really need a new corset from cyberdog and a new pair of trousers from there too if i can find any that fit (they have the weirest sizes in there, either too big or too small) I found out one of my friends might be seriously ill so im kinda upset about that but hopefully he'll be ok. If he's not he'll be the fith friend to die :o( so im kinda hoping. Well im bored so im gonna go and watch a video or a DVD or both. post comment

Sleeepyyyy!!! [18 Sep 2003|11:22am] [ mood | sleepy ] [ music | Prodigy.......Voodoo People ] Its 11am in the morning and i'm at college and have been since 8.45am. I just finished my music lesson and i was sitting in the recording studio resting on the mixers gradually falling to sleep and kept on getting woken up by Tom bringing up the fader so i could hear Martin speaking shit. Im now in the common room with the guys (and Ryan, obviously) listening to Prodigy and just trying SOOO hard not to fall to sleep on the keyboard. Im so tired i cant even read properly...everythings so blury and fucked up :oS Im going to town in a sec with Ryan and ill probably end up falling asleep on him on the bus there. I need to get some bleach for my hair so i can properly dye it blue (my mum said she'd help me) and i have this urge for rice ;o/ Well im going to town now, so ill write more later if im not sleeping. post comment

HaPpY bIrThDaY mEeEe.... [17 Sep 2003|08:21pm] [ mood | cheerful ] [ music | infected mushroom.....Power of Celtics ] YEP! Finally im 19. Christ i dont feel it, i was fighting with the guys today (Ryan fucking bites) and i felt about 5 lol. I had a good day. I was early...yes, EARLY! for college today for once in my life. Cant remember the last time i was early or on time for college (or i just dont turn up) I had a cool day. The guys all wished me a happy birthday bless them, and Lewis got me a card :o) After class we went to the pub and i played pool with Natty and Darran. I floored Natty but Darrans too good for me, he's fast too lol. Lewis bought me a drink (i cant help thinking he 'likes' me. the other day in photography he had this obsession with me, all his pictures had me in, even the ones i didnt know he'd taken) and we sat out side for a while. It was Natty, Ruth, me, Lewis, Mike, Mitch, Ryan, Martin, Paul, Darran and Matt. Dave and Trevor couldn't make it. Daves excuse was 'im ill' despite promising me faithfully he'd come and also despite the fact he was fine yesterday. Then when we went inside Vicky joined us. I never liked her until today, she always seemed like a right bitch and always gave me weird looks but shes ok. I didn't get pissed coz i had to go home later. I went home about 4pm, convinced it was 3pm. I was standing at the bus stop for 20 mins like a twat waiting for the 3.05pm bus at 3.40 (thinking it was 2.40pm...you see thats what drinking at 1pm-3.30pm does to you) and JUST catching my bus. It leaves at 4.30pm and i got to the college at 4.20pm. Went home and found out Becky had got the Marilyn Manson tickets!!! YAY!!! Im soooo exited i cant wait :o) I only have to wait 2 months lol. Oh well, its worth it :o) The bitch is though that at the NEC you cant take pictures!!! How the fuck are you supposed to 'capture the moment' without a bloody camera to capture it on??? I got clothes, chocolate, crimpers, straighteners and wavers and loads of money; and theres more to come :o)....CYBERDOG! I hear you calling me lol......i think i might buy the DJ ;o) he's yummy!!! Thats what i need; a lovely cyberman :o) post comment

AlLy CaT oF dOoM, who swallows razors....me, in my sleep i think [16 Sep 2003|02:23pm] [ mood | swallowing razors ] [ music | SPF 1000 Victim ] Im sitting here listening to Victim byt SPF 1000 and its AMAZING. I love this song. I should be at college but i rung in sick (yes i am actaully sick this time) I feel like im swallowing fucking razor blades (think i drink to much) and i cant move hy head without falling over and twating myself on something...knocking me out and wasting another day passed out on the kitchen floor...hmmm....worrying but oh well. I had a pretty damn good weekend too. Thursday i went to see the Rocky Horror show with Simon and there we met his friend (an actual trannie :oD) who were both dressed up in drag; with me feeling them both up throughout the WHOLE night hehehe...well i could't resist and the men on stage in drag were SO turning me on. I loved it ;o) After that we went to Schism and i met Myke (Myke_Minstar) and Mark (Uberfox) They are both so sweet and lovely. I would say more about what i think of them but they might read it and that would just be embarrasing lol. So all ill say is that they are cool people and i hope to see them both again sometime soon :o) Then on friday i went to Quarantine with Natty, Dave, Ruth, Mike and Vix etc (the usual group) and got totally shit faced and went back to Trevs and didn't sleep much (at all lol) and then went home after waiting for a train for 1hr. Seeing as how its my birthday tomorrow i plan to get completely rat arsed on friday and then sleep all day sat then go to work saturday night and sunday is SHOPPING and GARY NUMAN day!!! WOOOO FUCKING HOOO!!! :0) 4 comments|post comment

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