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Square Dance//Eminem |
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I am trying to get together a list for the grocery store but it is impossible. But, you can't go to the store without a list, otherwise, you will just get beer and chips and bell peppers and frozen orange juice or something and you are fucked. I wish I had someone that would do all this mundane shopping and make all the meals and I wouldn't have to worry about it. I guess I should have looked for a chef boyfriend...damn. Maybe next time.
Some crazy things happened in the last couple years. For one, I moved to Maryland, alone, for a job that I worked at for about two years. I lived (and worked) just outside of DC which was great. It was really hard at first - I didn't have any friends or family and spent the first 2-3 months pretty much alone. I didn't go out on the weekends or at nights. I did some exploring of the area on my own during the weekends, checking out new neighborhoods and restaurants. It was a pretty solitary life. But, I became more comfortable with my co-workers and I actually became pretty close with a handful of them.
The place I worked at had a pretty youthful vibe - a lot of the people there just came out of college or grad school with their masters - so it was a group of people in their 20's. But, that might be expected in the science field. And, I ended up finding my niche. Then, after about four months there, I was promoted out of the training/probation period. None of the work changed really, but I was getting more money and my job title changed. A true promotion!
I had visions of the future though...that a couple more years spent at that job and at that company would allow me to segway into a career in the FBI. DEA, AFT, etc. I would have a great resume and some connections. I heard that a handful of people have already made that career move in the past so I was hopeful that I might be able to as well.
But, about a year in, I realized, I just didn't care anymore. The excitement of the job wore off and I was pretty much just working there for the career options down the road - just working for the connections to bigger and better. I suppose that is not a unique situation, but for me it was. I thought this was the career that I really wanted. I thought this was the path I really wanted. I gave up so much to be there - friends, family, everything.
You know how you have a goal that you want so bad - something you have been working for so long you don't remember not wanting it. I fell in love with the goal of becoming a forensic scientist in highschool when browsing through one of those career books. I went to college and did that whole thing, I got side-tracked into physics and almost gave up the goal of getting into forensic science. But then when it came to go to grad school in physics, I couldn't do it. So I was in this weird state for a couple months (which coincided with keeping this journal) where I was in limbo. Then, I started looking for jobs and found one out in Maryland. I applied, interviewed and received an offer letter. Instantly, I accepted.
to be continued...
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