the all-seeing eye of patriarchy's Blurty|
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the all-seeing eye of patriarchy's Blurty:
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|Friday, May 23rd, 2003|
1:40PM EST: Connie gives up and finally just starts throwing things in boxes. She is a happier person
Pick a band and answer only using that band's song titles: LA TOYA
Describe yourself: you're gonna get rocked
How do some people feel about you?: badgirl
How do you feel about yourself?: you can count on me
Where would you rather be?: Camp Kuchi Kaiai
Describe what you want to be/do: I wanna be your toy
Describe how you live: How do I tell them
Describe how you love: Boys got somethin girls ain't got
Share a few words of wisdom: Heart don't lie
|Thursday, May 22nd, 2003|
Hi, my name is Connie Z and I own upwards of 54 purses and 30 decorative scarves.
and yes, I love them all.
|Wednesday, May 21st, 2003|
I got an apartment today! (could I spam with this anymore?)
this post gets a big WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
whatever livejournal sux and I hate it.
DId i Mention I work at aconvenience store now?
Anyway, an earlier assessment of me as a cashier=me as a driver was not far off the money. Combine that lack of skill with the garnering of a new manager drooling to show his managerial skills = not a good chance for me. Yes, it is true, I think I'll be let go after a while, I'm just that bad.
Earlier today I got a surprise phonecall from the associate dean. She wants me to apply to be an americorps Vista. While this is really honoring, to be asked to apply for a professional position that would mean a lot for my (future?), I'm still wary for the following reasons: being sealed in a job I might hate for 12 months, potentially hating it, still being stuck on campus. The pluses are that I've remembered how much I hate working menial jobs and there would be much sitting involved and it would be a day job.
I did not get a PO box today as planned because I discovered that I was overdrawn (???) for some odd reason or service charge and then like, 35 dollars was taken out of my last deposit WHAT. So that SUCKS EVEN HARDER.
oh, and I left the coffee pots on when I left work. NO worries, it didn't set fire the four hours I Was there with it on unattended, it won't again.
Tomorrow I call back everyone who called me about apartments, hit a tag sale, and probably apply at a couple more places with leads on employment.
wow, life is great! :)
if I were in a better mood and not getting sick, I'd probably relate the many numerous fiercely odd stories from work including me lecturing a drunk boy about his stupid mohawk, a lucid and over 40 middle class man having a discussion with me of where to find pornographic magazines because he was really determined, and oh, the boys of as I call it "AMerican History X-2".
|Wednesday, May 7th, 2003|
Sometimes I sit here and think about the void in my life that is my not owning every crystal waters cd ever made.
|I put my hand up on your hip
|Tuesday, May 6th, 2003|
Getting a job!??? ALSO CHECK
other things of note today:
*I fell twice in my platform heels. I hurt my ankle. It was EMBARRASSING
*I've officially made a couple pages for my zine. It's going to be way better than the first. Hey people who volunteered to edit, I'm using all of y'all more than likely. I figure I'll end up having FIVE people edit it. I mean, you just can't go wrong with such fine people, right?
*more zine rambling: I'm really excited about it. Less defining by oppression, more defining by personality. The trans stuff will be included as part of my life, but only because it affects my life. I've done my trans/fat/femme zine, it's done and over with. Time to move on. ALSO, all the art and stuff is by me! So it'll be a semi-art zine with some intense page layouts. I'm also thinking about experimenting making a mini zine using only transparencies, but I think the text may be too hard to read. We'll see.
*Oh, one more zine thing. After this one I'll be starting a split split (you read write, 2) zine with Bryn and Riley and Toby. I think it should be called THE GREATEST TRAN STORY EVER TOLD. or 50 FOOT TRAN. or THE BOYS AND GIRLS CLUB or something equally vomititious <3
*I got a super pixelated mock-native american quilt (??) FOOTBALL MOTIF scarf yesterday. It has to be seen to be believed.
*I have to get an apartment soon and I'm thinking about already seeking a second part time job. Hey, I have a friend I owe hundreds of dollars to! Also, even after that it'd provide some amazing amounts of money to get products for zomblasta. There's already FIVE zines that I wanna order but have no $$$ to. Not to mention patches.
okay, that's it!
|Sunday, May 4th, 2003|
I could find out I'm graduating
I have a job interview
|Wednesday, April 30th, 2003|
Hey, do any of you guys know any bookstore type deals that are good to submit your zine to? Cuz I ned to get more of my zines (*ahem* and more distro flyers) out there to people.
Never mind the stars in the sky
Never mind the when and the why
Got a feeling higher than high
This is the real thing
|Sunday, April 27th, 2003|
a public letter
You know what, fuck them, fuck all those people. I'm sitting in my room trying to build up the energy to fucking CLEAN I feel so worn down. By what they say about me and the things they do to hurt me. By their implications and the hurt they place on me. Hating on my body by gender my sex my sexuality MYSELF. They've cut me down so many times that I feel I'm only held together with pieces of ribbon that I keep retying.
This is a call out to all those people. That won't talk to me, that laugh at me, that say things to hurt me. That ask me awful questions, that ignore me, that say hurtful things, but deny it. To the people that depend on me to teach them how to treat me right, here's a hint, putting me in that position, doesn't! To the people that won't answer my employment calls cuz I'm queer.
I'm tired of being tokenized, marginalized, discriminated. I am so fed up with being hurt and my anger is the only thing that makes me keep on living. Fuck thoughts of hurting myself, fuck thoughts of giving up my life, but most importantly, fuck them for making me a scared, anxious, frigid girl who's doing all she can to not cry.
This has to be the start of a new way, because yesterday fucking sucked shit and the day before that did too and so did alot of other days. Unfortunately, tomorrow won't be much different unless my attitude changes, unless I find the strength to move on. It's me against the world and I ain't movin.
Cya in the ring, haters.
Smackin your ass,
with the artificial stuff, it has a bit of a sour taste
Cocoa butter is the edible vegetable fat from cocoa beans, extracted from the cocoa beans during the process of making chocolate and cocoa powder. Cocoa butter has only a mild chocolate flavor and aroma.
Cocoa butter is one of the ingredients used to make real chocolate, it is gives chocolate the ability to remain solid at room temperature, yet melt easily in the mouth.
Cocoa butter is one of the most stable fats known, containing natural antioxidants that prevent rancidity and give it a storage life of 2 to 5 years. It is used for its smooth texture in foods (including chocolate) and in cosmetics and soaps.
Why aren't there any more neneh cherry fans? I swear, she fucking did the "alternative" with rap and whatevs way back in 92, she talks about so much important shit and she's so real. Fucking shit, the woman was AMAZING. Neneh seriously has my #1 vote as most underapreciated females of the last quarter of the 20th century. She even made a song about Lenny Kravitz being unfaithful to his wife and lying ot her and made a SONG ABOUT IT (buddyx). HERE ARE SOME ( PHOTOS )
|Saturday, April 26th, 2003|
did I mention that I updated Zomblasta
lately? It has a SUAVE NEW COLOR SCHEME
|Friday, April 25th, 2003|
ninguem espara-me para estar trabalhado! :-(
|Thursday, April 24th, 2003|
Fui bailar no meu batel
Além no mar cruel
E o mar bramindo
Diz que eu fui roubar
A luz sem par
Do teu olhar tão lindo
Vem saber se o mar terá razão
Vem cá ver bailar meu coração
Se eu bailar no meu batel
Não vou ao mar cruel
E nem lhe digo aonde eu fui cantar
Sorrir, bailar, viver, sonhar...contigo
|Wednesday, April 23rd, 2003|
just in case there was any question: this fat bitch is going to take over the world, thx.
|Sunday, April 20th, 2003|
|Saturday, April 19th, 2003|
Does anyone else obsess about taking songs for their own? Like, you heara song and you wish you had made it and then fantasize about that actually happening? Well, via that I think I've come close to constructing my dream album in 10 songs. Here's the tracklisting:
1) New attitude
2)He's so shy
3)Crush on you
4)Head to Toe
5)I'm so excited
6)Lost in Emotion
7)Don't Cry out Loud
8)I'll never love this way again
9)Love Come down
10)I never knew love like this before
secret track: hot hot give it all you got