7:46pm: Escape

Make a part of your life an act that takes you beyond your bounds --helping people that are not part of your family or circle of friends, doing something that does not fit within your own self-definition.

Escape yourself.

A Daily Dose of Wisdom from the Rebbe
-words and condensation by Tzvi Freeman
Kislev 4, 5768

7:32pm: Knock-knock
Anyone still here?

5:08pm: In the history of how society handles its disabled members the Western world came a long way from Taigetos (aka. Taygetos or Taygetus), the mountain where ancient Spartans left their disable dor weak infants to die.

Taigetos, in a way, sped up natural selection among Spartans. The weak and crippled were to die early, so those who would not be able to contribute to society were just eliminated. In a military state like Sparta this was viewed as something benefiting the greater community. More than two milenia later another military heavy state would adopt the same approach.

Once realising that disability was not caused by the devil, it was religious people who first started to care for the disabled. It is recorded that Scholastica took a deaf girl and taught her to speak (or more likely, to sign) and it was Abbé Charles-Michel de l’Épée, a French priest, who established the world’s first deaf school.

Even today in many countries the care and education of people with disabilities is primarily run by church groups, and many disabled people are aided by churches in their independent lives, both financially and otherwise.

It seems to me that many of the people around me expect disabled folks to be religious. I have often wondered why that is when my own disabilities have driven me farther from real faith than anything before. Doubting God’s very existence or goodness was my reaction. At the same time I see others turning to God and using their new found faith as a source of peace and strength. Yet again others view their disability as God’s will and use that as an excuse not to do anything about their abilities or quality of life.

I have to admit that because of this last attitude I am always worried when I hear about churches actively seeking out and proselytizing freshly disabled people. It is just too easy to fall back on the “If God wants me to get better He will make me better” reasoning. Definitely a lot easier than enduring gruelling PT and OT, undergoing possibly painful and exhausting treatment.

However there is a very simple concept that can help religion be the driving force for people with disabilities. It can be summarized as follows: Work hard, pray hard. Help yourself and God will help you, too.

Following this simple rule religion and faith especially can become not a weight or a crutch, but rather the very fuel that is needed for striving to better ourselves, whether we live with or without disabilities. Waiting for God to perfrm a miracle is as if we were waiting for a doughnut to fly into our mouths while drinking our morning coffee.

Religion can also provide a feeling of acceptance and brotherhood, a place for integration and inclusion, which is vital for the feeling of normality in life. Churches can provide certain resources, mebers can extend the much needed fellowship. Still, one will have to deal with pity and sorrow and even embarrassment, just like anywhere else, because we are not equally open minded. It is normal: the same can be faced anywhere else. However, the relative intimacy of a spiritual family can help with tolerance that will then leave the church building and exist outside as well.

Hopefully this tolerance and acceptance will become a reality in the lives of many people, and we can turn away from the path leading to Huxley’s Brave New World.

3:24pm: Jumping on the bandwagon
Or just going along on foot? Maybe with a handcart? My on Johari window can be found here: http://kevan.org/johari?name=poeticceadsearc

Give me a link to yours if I haven't filled it out yet!

And the Nohari window... I was dared to do it...

http://kevan.org/nohari?name=poeticceadsearc

5:02pm: Happy Birthday to madscientist!

12:15pm: Matthias Rath Foundation

Matthias Rath Foundation

Matthias Rath Foundation

Matthias Rath Foundation

Matthias Rath Foundation

Matthias Rath Foundation

Matthias Rath Foundation

Matthias Rath Foundation

Help end suffering in Africa. Visit AIDS Combat Zone

6:53am: I am just reading Index.hu and one of the news items I find is that on January 20 a girl ran away from home in Cegléd because she got a principal's note at school. She got on a train and came to Budapest where she got lost. She got on a bus and found herself hungry and crying in a very nice neighbourhood in the Buda hills when a tall man with a girl approached her.

The tall man was no other than Hungary's prime minister, Ferenc Gyurcsány.

He called the girl's parents in Cegléd and she ended up staying with him and the next day she was taken home.

WOW. Good feeling that I live in a country where the PM walks around on the street and has time and willingness to rescue crying kids who are lost.

SuperGyurcsány! Seriously, I like the guy.

6:50am: Did I mention the awful pain in my chest for the past few days?

Well, being the hypochondriac I am I started to worry about all the possible complications from pancreatitis, some of which cause chest pain. Now being a quad I am not 100% sure where my chest hurts, it just hurts. So after the pain waking me up repeatedly I asked Keith to take me back to the hospital to get it checked out.

I have a broken rib. It wasn't broken when I left the hospital on Friday. So it is the mistery broken rib! Where is Poirot when I need him?

7:34am: MS Paint Meme results--Work Safe
For empyral
( Read more... )

8:29pm: Meme time!
1. Comment and I'll pick one of your LJ interests and draw you a picture in MS paint.
2. You have no say in what I draw for you!
3. Put this in your journal.

8:39pm: Listening to this, I have to realise I was a pretty good pianist in my day... The mistake in it comes from a three-year old bumping into me. Yeah, that happens in Church. OK, so it wasn't the best ever performance, but still. I, for the longest time, though the recording was of my brother but he just told me, it was actually me. How fun. I just wish I had some recording when I finally abandoned the David Glenn Hatch approach to the piano.

OK, onto more important matters. I can't get to my e-mail using POP3 now! I have no idea why as it always worked before. The worst thing is that it won't work for Kevin or Dan either, and i can only hope they remember to check the webmail!

I will never take my children for granted. Never.

8:54am: OK. So I finally did it. We Can Win!

Click on Derek. There are some of my writings. Nothing really new. More coming.

11:38am: On Passing--The translation
"I dreamt," said the boy to the girl.
"What did you dream?" the girl asked as she caressed the boy's face.
"I was a dove," the boy replied and he looked into the distance. "A white dove. I was flying among the clouds. I landed by the Danube and watched the waves."

The girl was watching the boy's face as it hid between the big, white pillows. The boy's scent had long been lost in the artificially clean stench of disinfectant, but is appeared to the girl as if she could feel it again, like when they cuddled in the haystack on a summer night, running from the rain.

"Then," the boy continued, "I took off again and I just flew and flew till I reached your window. There I stopped and looked inside.
"What did you see?" asked the girl.
"Happiness: your new family. Your son and husband."

The girl didn't speak. The years between the haystack and the overly white hospital room were long. Long and many. They built a wall between themselves, a wall with a brick missing here and there, where they could glance at each other and then they went on. The girl never stopped. She had neither reason nor time. The haystack, the summer rain, the raspberry scented kiss maybe never happened. Her brain forgot but in her soul the memory burnt. Only a cliché, but very true. She went on and didn't look back.

"I saw that you were happy and I saw you had to go. I opened my wings and flew again. I flew into the Sun and burnt. Not even ashes were left after me. Not even a memory. But I was free."

The boy looked at the girl.

"Now go. I need to leave, too. To be finally free."

The girl stood up, pressed her lips to the boy's cheek one final time and then started to walk towards the door. She didn't stop, didn't look back. This was just another missing brick in the wall. For a moment their hands touched, but the moment was gone and she had to return to the present. The boy stayed in the past. The girl knew there would be no more missing bricks. The wall closed up for once and for ever.

10:35am: Playlist meme
Better late than never!

Picked 1 line from the first 20 random songs on my playlist. A few are in Hungarian. Comment with guesses!
( Play On )

11:16am: Go to !

Right click on the picture of Mr & Mrs. Bush at the top to "save picture as" and look at the file name. The best laugh I had today. Thanks, priyatelka!

( A screencap just in case it gets deleted )

Also...

Gore/Clinton '08!

And no, I haven't said which Clinton I meant!

Also: This morning my family had French toast, French fries and Heinz Ketchup. And we are planting red carnations in the garden (ok, you have to be Hungarian to get that) and "keeping" some free birds. Man, I'm such a rebel!

9:19am: ( Birth Month meme )

Now some of that was... hmm... I wish.

I am thinking, Matthew Shepard would much rather be alive today than be an icon.

I am thinking, I'd much rather be walking than try to bring about some change from a wheelchair. It is only the irony that now I'm in a chair in a practically inaccessible town after being in the Ramp Brigade at my school and just for fun. We were building ramps, got rid of thresholds, plated handles and bars in the homes of people with physical disabilities. That was so much fun. We had such a great crew, we had so much fun just working together. It could have been anything. But it was building ramps. Maybe I jinxed myself.

I miss doing art with disabled kids. I miss going hiking iwth a group of Down Syndrome scouts.

I miss handing out Vote for Al Gore flyers. OK, so these days it wold be Kerry/Edwards stuff. How I wish it was Howard Dean's name there.

4:06pm: Happy Birthday to sailorsfefe!

8:41pm: GMail invites
I have some. Want one? Comment with email address.

8:45am: Wear Yellow!
I just downloaded the Wear Yellow AIM Expression, complete with smilies for my AIM... Actually for all of my screen names! Now this makes me happy.

I have finally put up the Lance poster I got from James a long time ago in my new room, and I am forcing myself to read Lance's autobiography again. I don't know if I'll manage--as I told billygoatsluvme (and probably my whole flist)--that reading the book hurts too much. Maybe because I have never been able to find the support group I really need. Or maybe I don't need it. Maybe I just want it. I mean I have survived and remained relatively sane these past 4 years without a support group. Maybe... I am just imagining I need a support group.

( If the yellow letters were illegible... Here it is in default colour )

9:37am: News
Today I woke up to Take That on VH1 Classic, so I immediatelly put my CI on and caught most of the song. Now those of you who are ooutside Europe: Take That was the boyband where Robbie Williams became famous. I just thought it was important to mention that, because it had been forever that I have listened to any Take That, and the last song I listened to was the über cheesy Babe. This morning it was Relight My Fire. I am sure you all wanted to know.

The Take That was a pleasant wake up call, but then I had to talk to Keith who had just received my biopsy results on the phone. The news was not good, but it wasn't absolutely bad either. Keith explained as pre-cancer tissue being present, but knowing my genetic flaw calls for oral chemotherapy immediatelly (starting Wednesday) and a small surgery to remove the whole lump to prevent further spread.

"This is nothing to panic about," said Keith. I am not sure if i can still panic about anything that is not full blown cancer. I am far from the stoic and wise man I'd like to be, but I am no longer that panicky teenager I was four years ago when it all started. I haven't even cried. I am just sitting here, listening to VH1 Classic and waiting for Primer amor... a mil por hora and Amigas y rivales to start on TV2, so when the nurse comes over on her round in the afternoon I'll know what she is talking about. At least I can put a face to the names.

I miss the kids a whole lot. Janice took the three boys to Frankfurt till things caml down here and Hannah is visiting her mother in Greece where she is digging now or doing something... I am not 100% sure. You never know with an archeologist, even if their names is not Dr. Henry Jones. Yes, I am talking about Indiana Jones. I adore Indiana Jones. Odd it might sound, the third one was my absolutely favourite movie. Probably the presence of River Phoenix and Sean Connery made that film my favourite one. I think the comedic elements were the best in that movie as well.

Yes, I realise I am rambling. Maybe I'll have something to say later.

6:52pm: Oh man, Eurosport.com is the source of all wisdom!
Or at least something close to that. They, however, crack me up to no end with some of their comments. They have called fans morons when they were playing chicken with the riders, they have written about when and how the riders take care of biological needs.... (Hm, yeah, it must be hard to urinate at 70 kph.) And today readers could find out about what's in the feed bag riders get.

Just a comment: 16:20    Simeoni is back, instantly overhauled by the entirety of the US Postal team... As the American squad swept up the Italian, Viatcheslav Ekimov moved right alongside Simeoni, pointing two fingers from his own eyes to those of Simeoni. Message: You're marked. Don't even try it...

In an hour and a half the TV broadcast starts as well, possibly capturing the last part of the last stage, hopefully getting Lance's triumph broadcast. Of course there is the debate whether US Postal, including Lance Armstrong has been doping or not. Of course there is the Simeoni defamation suit. Of course there is the question whether Lance will be returning next year. Of course I'll miss Lance at the Olympics as he decided not to participate....

And I actually saw the final. Good job, Lance!

17:43    Lance Armstrong finishes safe in the bunch, sealing his record-breaking sixth win at the world's greatest bike race.

2:53pm: Random rambling
What is this thing about Sundays? I woke up, came online and there were less than twenty new entries on my friends page! I am slightly bored! OK, so I am totally bored.

Today is the final stage of Tour de France, and after that you won't have to read my babbling about it! At least till the Olympics when I should start babbling about that. The broadcast for the last 169 km starts in about 45 minutes, so there should be a further update when it is over. I am very much looking forward to babble about Lance a little more.

I read on Index that the polarity of the earth is going to shift and the magnetic field is decreasing now. A few days later I saw a documentary on Discovery about the same thing. I was kind of intrigued by this and the history of changing polarity and then I started to wonder if Mars has magnetic fields? Or is it ossible that Mars onbe had them and losing them caused the extinction of life on Mars? And what will happen to the microorganisms that reached the Moon and Mars from Earth, most recently with the Spirit and the Opportunity and posibly the Beagle-2? will those microorganisms be the first of a new life on Mars?

One of our neighbours has also dropped off a copy of one of the local UFO magazines, and I found a well written and highly entertaining article, which, though unsupported by a lack of sources named, proved to be a good read and actually raised some questions. It was about how the Germans used V-2 rockets for space jumps and how the first moon landing actually happened in 1957 and that the US and the USSR had a joint Mars expedition as early as 1962. The actually interest I have is the V-2 rockets. From what i have read about them they could possibly carry out a space jump. In that case it might be true that Hitler did have plans for a space program.

[/pointless post]

3:07pm: Partly GIP
OK, so even though my Star Trek icons suck majorly, I know not a thing about tubes and brushes, and I have to play around with Paint as my freshly downloaded PSP 6 won't work... I like the icons I made today. They are nothing fancy, no hdden messages, but maybe that is why Ilike them so much right now. They represent things important to me.

What exactly is Lance doing?! Seriously, tactics are not doing any good to my stomach! I was kind of happy when Armstrong made the break at 129 kms to go... and then ten kms later he is back in the Peloton, with an over 3 minute gap between the leading group and the Peloton. Go, Lance, go!

That polka dot jersey reminds me of my favourite sweets.... Túró Rudi!

       

Six times a Tour de France top climber, Richard Virenque and a Túró Rudi. Except in Hungary Túró Rudi has not been associated with cycling, though there was a commercial a few years ago with a water polo player.

OK, Lance, being over 6 minutes behind the leaders... You should start speeding up a bit! Go, Lance, Go!

10:53am: Back. Really. At least for now.
I am home! That means I have access to Blurty again. Yay!

Now I fully intended to read through my friends list from ever since I was gone but alas, this is impossible. I decided to read War and Peace instead. Or something equally long.

So I'd like to ask my dear Blurty friends to take this opportunity and update me on the most important events in the last two months or so in the comments.

Are there paid accounts yet?

8:47pm: Recently our family got addicted to BBC Prime. It started with Kevin not being able to get enough of Jamie Oliver on Spektrum and what other channel he was on, so now we have a bunch of green stuff in our kitchen window that we never use, only when there are guests and we want to show off. I, myself, prefer Keith Floyd's approach to cooking, especially when he uses a bottle of good wine... it doesn't matter that the recipe doesn't call for wine.

Then it was the Teletubbies invading our home, but their invasion lasted approximately twenty minutes. I think those Teletubbies are taking illegal substances, otherwise why would they get random giggling fits doing totally normal things? And is there anything ever on the television screens on their tummies?

Then, of course there is the football free zone, which is quite nice, and they have all kinds of nice BBC programs. There is EastEnders and Classic EastEnders, not to mention S Club 7 in Hollywood, the show that Dan and I used to watch on Saturdays after the morning cartoons, having huge slurpies from the ice cream place a block down the street... Nice memories from Summer 2002!

And of course there is the one particular show: Balamory. Craig started to watch it a week or so ago, and I think he has a major crush on Miss Hoolie. His two other favourite characters are Penny Pocket, a girl in a power wheelchair, and PC Plum, the local policeman. He always sings along with PC Plum, who has a real nice little song about... himself.

The whole show is just adorable from the colourful houses to the nice adult characters. Even the topics are just übercute. The Daffodil Tea Party was adorable, not to mention the song that was in the episode about the Litter Bug.

Craig might be a little older than the target audience, but getting familiar with all the different accents is a good speech understanding exercise for him, as Balamory is a fictional Scottish island. His English vocabulary is expanding as well, and to be honest... Balamory is waaaaay better than Yu-Gi-Oh or whatever it is called.