you could slit my throat and with my one last gasping breath I'd apologize for bleedin on your shirt   
08:49pm 11/12/2003
mood: busy
music: you'r so last summer- taking back sunday
Today French was fun. I am aware that I talk about French far to much… but it was fun. Okies, the reason it was fun was because there was no teacher. Therefore much talking ensued. We got to do the best passage ever. Higher French is weird. Before we got stuff about people who loved their family. This passage today was about a girl who was embarrassed by her parents so stopped eating. The student told us in her exam, it was about a man who became woman. This was not a misread on her part, since being s student of French teaching means she knows it pretty well. Also we were talking about Lord of the rings. If this suprises anyone, anyone at all I am worried. By we I of course mean me and Vicki because no one else in me French class is sad enough to talk about Lord of the rings with me for 2 hours… and enjoy it. Tis the wonder of Vicki, and no I am not just saying this because she is giving me Matt Skiba and reads this journal. Honest I’m not. Note the lack of shifty eyes. Right now I am meant to be doing homework, But I am so unbelievably hungry. Yes, it is the return of the hungry Lauran. Not that err she ever left. But yeh. I can’t concentrate when I am hungry. That is my excuse and I a sticking to it! I have a netiquette test tomorrow. Yes netiquette. Oh the weirdness. The fact that to pass computing you need netiquette is beyond weird. It’s so weird it’s off the fun fun weird chart that I sometimes use. I need to stop taking about school, for I am always talking about school, and who wants to hear about that? Really? Exactly. Yah got it in one you anonymous ( for that is one of the social effects of the wide area network that is the internet) but psychic and knowledgeable person. May I suggest a membership to MENSA? They would most likely be glad to have you. That with your strange anonymous psychic like abilities. Right now I have complimented everyone who will read this ever…. I should go. Because I have nothing to actually say. Due to the lack of anything…I want to use the phone. Mostly to order food. But me mum is on it. She has been on said phone for 4 HOURS. I ask you, how can anyone be one the phone for 4 HOURS?? Not even I go on the phone for that amount of time and I am teenager. It is my right to go on the phone and ramble about stuff. My right! Pah… I still have an English essay to do…. If only I was allowed on msn. That would make everything better. I can see a 6 o clock start tomorrow…. heh...

Also in the world of Lauran a Pc site just stole a mac site. I went on this site and it auto linked me to a PC site. This is a conspiracy. In fact it is such a conspiracy I am going to post this joke. ready for it?

The box said "Requires Windows 95 or better" so I installed Linux.

Yah! Taking revenge in me geeky way :D. Why be violent when you can punish em with your stolen witticisms? stupid anti mac conspiracies... *realises bill gates will make sure her blurty gest suspended* I'll be good. I just got shouted at for hitting the keys too hard. Apparently if I don't shape up I am being banned from the computer. Err okies? Maybe I should buy my own keyboard and then I can type however I like, I would also have a mouse that worked. Pah! I just got another dirty look, and when I tried to plead my case
" I'm typing as lightly as I can, when I type lightly type slower and make more mistakes and I already make a ton of mistakes...."

I got told to shut up. Gotta love my family, really you do. You can so tell I am really hungry, because when I am hungry I get all snappy. And right now I sound pretty snappy. I'm sorry if I sound snappy.... I wish people would hurry up and feed me or else I might pull an audrey 2... Oh well. I'll be happy anyways....
and on this note I bid you

(6 led me astray | take my hand)

I've got a funny feeling we're all going to lose...   
06:17am 10/12/2003
mood: worried
music: reel big fishes... cheery isn't it?
I believe I shall make this short, for unnecessary typing shall just delay me... today has bad writen all over it in bright pink marker pen, with a couple of stickers and some pretty stars for extra added sparkle... I didn't sleep last night, therefore I am a wreck. I have a presentation.... but I don't have me stuff AND I have a computing test but I lost me knowledge about.... well actually I never had it....Oh and when I get caught on this... I'll die. so yes. On the plus side the bright pink marker pen is pretty. Verily so. And I have updated twice in the one week.... I feel extra specially bad for being short.... have something I stole from... well everyone... I'll yours in. Honest I will. lol

1. Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.
2. Am I lovable?
3. How long have you known me?
4. When and how did we first meet?
5. What was your first impression?
6. Do you still think that way about me now?
7. What do you think my weakness is?
8. Do you think I'll get married?
9. What makes me happy?
10. What makes me sad?
11. What reminds you of me?
12. If you could give me anything what would it be?
13. How well do you know me?
14. When's the last time you saw me?
15. Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't?
16. Do you think I could kill someone?
17. Describe me in one word.
18. Do you think our friendship is getting stronger/weaker/or staying the same?
19. Do you feel that you could talk to me about anything and I would listen?
20. Are you going to put this on your Blurty and see what I say about you?


(3 led me astray | take my hand)

I'll stop the world and melt with you,   
04:08pm 09/12/2003
mood: scared
music: melt with you- saves the say
I do believe I made friends with the french assistant. Tis verily weird, in fact it is beyond weird. It is down right scary, since she hates us. And I don't just mean hate in a " ohh Lauran overexaggerating" sense of the word I mean HATE. For example her fun making at me grammer. It isn't my fault I don't have grammer, we just never got taught it. No one even told me what an adjective was till 2nd year french. And even then it was by accident. My grammer is fun, and original, and an excellent way of expressing myself! But that is slightly off topic, since she has put down her hate and was nice. Instead of doing french, we talked about Voodoo dolls, random and completely insane. It was good fun. She also gave Vicki some advice about working in France:
" If you ever go to work in france, take your contract to a police station to be checked, they'll rip you off"

Not that Vicki is ever gonna work in france, but cha know, it's the thought that counts and stuff. I smell like tea, tis the weirdest , I was staining paper with tea. It took me much with the longness to make it look all old and pretty, and stuff. And then I forgot it. Oppppsies. Ahhh weeellll It looked good. But the whole project has to be done for tomorrow. I thought it was friday. Am just making the bible. I shall steal the rest from me sister. she has dolls house stuff that'll work as good. I am verily bored, I think I shall play with a stapler or something, just for the fun of it. Staplers, as you may all know, are an excellent source of entertainment. If staplers were better advertised they could top the toy charts, while saving parents a good deal of money. Now shouldn't I work in advertisement? People would love me. I would make children ask for random stuff like spatuchula's, rather than barbie dolls. Lets not get into me Barbie doll speech....And confusion reigns. Go it, with it's amazing ability to confuse. A bit like me. for....( and yes it is time for a quoatable quotation)

Romance is dead, it was acquired in a hostile takeover by Hallmark and Disney and sold off piece by piece says: (16:27:46)
   most of the time I don't know what I am talking about either

which I suppose is much good. For then everyone is confused, and for fear of looking dumb they jus won't ask.... Well me wonderous half hour is up, and I am being thrown off. This wasn't nearly fun enough....

(take my hand)

I probably shouldn't tell you but I dreamed of you last night...   
10:36am 01/12/2003
mood: sleepy
music: broken promise rings- the ataris
Well first of all I would like to say lollipops. Because lollipops is a cool word. Try saying. like for example in the middle of maths, randomly shout lollipops. tis fun fun... not that I've done that or anything *shifty eyes*... randomly quoting shakespeare also does the trick... not that I've done that either. Err yeh. As you may have noticed, which no one ever does till I come in the next day and go " hey... what'd I miss", I am not at school. Therefore journal updation, since I was just sitting revising computing stuff anyways. Plus I also realised me journal is seriously under updated. This is because I always feel like I need to be interesting. however I never am. I have realised this by reading old entries, so I have decided to abadon the ways of Journalness and just update. At least for today. I have also decided to abandon me comma ways and embrace the full stop. At least for a little while, I keep full stopping everything. You see? Was that full stop needed? I don't think so. But there it is. Fulls stops are addictive. so is msn... but lets not get into msn's detrimental effect on me life. Pirates comes out today me thinks! No one willl find this interesting since

  • I have practically told everyone( including me parents 14 times in case they didn't get the hint, with the whole christmas list underlined thing)
  • Everyone is far to grown up and mature to like it
  • the amount of adverts screened about it will have driven everyone to a Johnny Depp pirate hating fury and the mere mention may provoke a riot.

    None of there things matter to little old me of course because I am... em.. cool. Yeh... cool. Know what? I have just noticed that random is not a mood. Since I quite often feel totally random I am rather shocked and disappointed by this harrowing discovery. Now I will need to think about how I feel before I chose me mood. This requires effort.considering I have been up since 6 it just isn't fair to ask me to make an effort. how comes working is a mood, but random isn't? Me dad found the coolest thing online. a petition to get better msn for the mac. This will never work of course but a girl can try. If anyone is actually reading this please be nice and help me. Since I want buddie pics, and web cam capabilities.

    please and thankyou

    I am getting rather upset that people keep insulting me computer. It is pretty, intelligent, with an excellent memory and biting wit, and just because it doesn't have have some software doesn't mean it couldn't. I am beginning to feel like the Martin Luther King of computers, except without the purpose, or er the intelligence, or the articulate-nes.. In other words not at all.... there goes that theory. Okies now I must go for I have to revise, also I have a drama essay for tomorrow and I need to do it or else I will get killed, and I don't want to get killed by something that was most likely found in Ms McKays costume cupboard. For obvious reasons. alllllthough, I did once find a prettiful fairy costume, It was all sticky out and beady and Liked it so much I asekd them were they got it. they didn't know, and the probably think I am insane. The again all drama pupils are insane. I can't decide if you have to be insane to pick drama. or drama makes you that way. I blame drama, then I have reasons. But insanity rocks. Normality is like the gravitational pull, it makes things all boring and unfloaty. And everyone need some floaty in their day, like caffine excpet not medically proven to be bad.
    farewell for now

    (2 led me astray | take my hand)

    Kiss me down by the broken tree house...Swing me upon its hanging tire...   
    12:10pm 23/11/2003
    mood: happy
    music: kiss me- sixpence none the richer
    I am having slight problems turning round, since the blinds are opened and if I turn round the sun goes in my eyes and blinds me. It’s quite not good because me little sister keeps talking to me. I think she trying to permanently damage me sight. She doesn’t like me much. Lol. I am, as always, hungry and tired. I realise that by always complaining I am hungry I paint a very bad impression of
    1) My family
    2) Me
    I am not a neglected child. Honest I am not. I just require a great deal of food. And I have yet to have breakfast. Sundays are always like this. I didn’t sleep last night. I kept waking up and I have no idea why…. When I did sleep I kept having weird dreams. Normally me weird dreams are good…. But these weren’t. Which kinda sucks. Because funny dreams rock… I know what they mean anyway. I need to stop worrying. I worry too much. So yeh. I have been sitting wide-awake since 8… stumbled out of bed about 10, me mum was up. And watching UK style. Decorating programmes at 10 in the morning? How she can manage all the drill noises without going insane I cannot figure out. They were big with the hurting of my head. There is this woman who is obsessed with mosaic. I have decided mosaic is the coolest. When I am older my house will be entirely mosaic’d on the outside. We should all thank the Romans for this. More people should thank the Romans. Just because they tried to take over our country is no reason to underrate them after all the Egyptians used to force poor innocent people to build pyramids under the sun, this could result in severe heat stroke. Not good, and yet we still talk about them as if they were the best things since smaller bricks that don’t require six people to move. My head really hurts but I complain too much and it is rather annoying so I shan’t talk about it. But it does. It was Powerpuff girl day yesterday. I got a bit too excited about this and started telling people. They didn’t share my enthusiasm. I was talking on msn though and kept missing the good bits. So I taped it. I am fully aware of how sad this makes me but…. It’s the Powerpuff girls!! So now I have like 5 hours worth of random adventures and good lines to watch, this should be a good boredom beater. And I certainly have a lot of boredom to beat. There are very few people on. Which is weird because it is now an acceptable time to be up. Kinda. Lol. I am temped to go back to my bed but it is a rather pointless endeavour as I would get up again in 20 minutes only to discover me little sister stole the computer. And she doesn’t think I know why she keeps hanging around here, But I know all…. Well okies I don’t but this was in case she was reading over my shoulder. Plus its fun to pretend your omnipotent. Good for the old ego. Hehe she left her phone here. It is tempting to read her text messages and bribe her with the information I discover. But that would be vindictive. And I am trying to be a good, helpful big sister. The kind that doesn’t bribe. Shame too, that would have been fun. Lol. Well if this is me updation which err it is, then it is done. I have updated like I was asked to. I hope this made you happy like you promised.

    (1 led me astray | take my hand)

    I really wish it was only me and you,I'm jealous of everybody in the room   
    07:16pm 20/11/2003
    mood: confused
    music: first date -blink 182
    Today Lauran feels like talking in french.

    Unfortunately Lauran does not know much french

    Je ne parle pas francais

    This makes her sad

    Je suis triste

    And for some unknown reason… hungry
    Je suis affameé

    Lauran is bored

    je m'ennuie

    Lauran is boring

    Je suis ennyeux

    Lauran has had enough of speaking a language she does not understand and therefore is leaving. Lauran hopes you enjoyed the world of French.

    Au revoir et farewell

    (take my hand)

    But I know, yes,I know that I want you for more than a friend   
    07:03am 14/11/2003
    mood: hungry
    music: a little doubt goes a long way... Reel big fish. quietly...
    Tis early again. Very early. Very very early, and I'd much rather be in me bed thankyou. But I am not because I am a girl, and I do crazy things like get up really early to wash me hair. And now I am tired. On the plus side me hair is squeeky clean, and fresh and the likes. Still tiredness is big with the prevailing. Plus I keep half expecting me mum to barge in and ask me exactly what I am doing. Which she will do soon. For on the weekends they sleep far to late and weekdays they get up far too early. I am on msn. No one is there. No one at all, for they are all snuggled up in their cosy beds. I think as soon as I dry me hair I should go back to mine.... but then I shall be late. And being late isn't good and gives a bad impression to your future employee. lol. I think I am a bit preoccupied with tiredness this morning.... and my one fan must be telling me to shut up. I did me drama homework. The easiest ever.... since it consisted of book covering and name writing. heh. So now I have a pink book But who shall star in it is in question. will it be Tinkerbell? Butercup? Matt Skiba? The decison... it is so hard. lol. I am thinking moody buttercup... who is actually strangely like me.... But I must beat Amie in the Matt Skiba war..... me mother is coming now... I better hide the internetness.

    (take my hand)

    it's like rain on your wedding day... it's a free ride when you've already payed...   
    10:43pm 11/11/2003
    mood: accomplished
    music: ironic- Alanis Morisette
    I don't like death threats. I don't like death threats because they are not fun. I don't like death threats because they are not fun and scary. I don't like death threats because they are not fun, and scary and death like in outcome. And yet I am much with the recieving of them. However it has come on a day of funness. I did my debate. And I got through. so even scary unfun death like death threats can not make me feel any less accomplished. Although realising that I have done no homework can. I should do homework. I should have done homework an hour ago. Too late now, I see a late night panicness coming on. I also see alot of repetition..... This is because it is a writing style used to bulid up and convey information. Or so that english book they gave us said. And it was written by english teachers.. it can not be wrong! For english teachers are always right.... at least in matters of english. I have alot of french catch up to do, since I got out off me last two periods. I also have alot of vicki related apoligising to do, since I promised her I would be in... oppsies.

    sorry Vicki

    there that is at least a grovelling like start. Though it shall require alot more..... ahhh well. I am going to go back to feeling accomplished. It even has it's own mood. :D look. *points*. So now I accomplished panicked and will not be killed... this however means school tomorrow. can I just say yuck. and yuck somemore.....But I must keep the goodness flowing... I'll be up late....


    (1 led me astray | take my hand)

    I'm sane but I'm overwhelmed ,I'm lost but I'm hopeful...   
    10:45am 09/11/2003
    mood: cold
    music: one hand in my pocket... Alanis Morissette
    It is early. far to early for my liking. Well okies to most normal " I get up when I'm supposed to" people it is entirely unearly but in the world of " I sleep in as an act of teenage rebellion..yeh yeh okies am just lazy" it is the middle of the night. And being up in the middle of the night with no one to talk to isn't fun. I have some homework I could be getting on with but I am bored enough without pushing myself over that edge that reallly at this point in time is but a few steps away. So yeh, homework is out. I am quite aware that I shall have to do it at some point but that some point is later. Everyone is still alseep I come from a house of people who do not get up early on sundays, though this sunday is more sleep like since me ickle sister is ill and people have to get up in the middle of the night and check on her. This is annoying since we share a room and theres overly concerned parents keep waking me up, and trust me 7 am on sunday doesn't look nice, tis like Avril without make up not nice. I went to Cheryls last night, t'was all fun. And I got a Mc Donalds! Yah! I of course bought her one also to repay her for her cookies, which are now renound on blurties everywhere so she better be happy. She got married although for legal reasons I can not mention who to, as did I.... I probably can say who too but I shall ask permission before declaring my marriage me thinks. I have to work on a debate today, by work on I mean completely rewrite. Tis all yuck like and I think I left the original at Cheryls which isn't so good, since I need it here not well there. Tis too quiet I think I shall put on some music, I have headphones so I dun need to worry about waking anyone up. Go the wonderful invention that is headphones! I can now sway to my morning music, which is ultimately the same as the music for the rest of the day, except quieter. I am quite wondering whee everyone.... tis all weird. When I am alseep people come on early and when I am wake you all sleep in. People are twisted. yups they are. Tis very not warm in here, I think my legs just turned into ice blocks. On the plus side they can now be used for may purposes other than walking for example to make a pretty sculpture, or cool that increasignly warming drink. Or if it's MNc Donalds to make it look like they have given you double the coke they actually have. I am glad my legs can nt be part iof commerce or art. I think I will chose art, since Capitalists are bad. They force us poor scots off our land and replace us with sheep so that the whole world believe welive with cheviot type things and prace around in kiltsa shouting see you Jimmy( since everyone in the world is called Jimmy) and before you ask yes I have been reading the cheviot again. Oh and the crucible. which quite rocks. I rather enjoy, even though I though it was boring before. It uses fun words. Like Othello and the word strumpet! :D. Go fun words. My mum just got up, yah! She's making breakfast! I am all happy since I am so hungry I was contemplating eating my arm.... As opposed to my lips which I had tried previously. But obviously they are kinda need during the whole process. If anyone had actually read this may I just say.... what is the matter with you?! However I would also like to thank you for your loyalty since you are clearly my one devoted reader person. And your still all loyal.

    (2 led me astray | take my hand)

    Let's walk home, let's be afraidI wanna grab you by the arms and kiss you so hard...   
    05:48pm 07/11/2003
    mood: chipper
    music: you've got so far to go..... alkaline trio :D
    I am being told in caps to post a quiz. CAPS!!! That is clearly a threat. But I don't post without an entry, and I can't be bothered making an entry since I am all lazy like. But yah I succumb.... and post. I was off yesterday, t'wasn't fun I would have thrown meself out the window for something to do but that's not nearly random enough if you ask me since it is quite clearly overdone... damn movies stealing my potentially fun and random ways of passing the time...... of late I have been a Stevens. The eye toy rocks and I now improve...although eyetoyness hasn't been happening for a while... I have nearly died of suffocation a few times..... not that I mind. lol... Carlyn was after eyeborws... I think she has given up now but if you see Carlyn coming towards you with tweezers then I beg of you run... RUN!! if you ask me this entry lacks the consistent dumbness and funness that I am so renound for..... SO I say farewell while my few readers are awake....okies my one reader. Damn your correctioness..... ah well one reader, I thank thee for your loyalty.

    Conscious self
    Overall self
    Take Free Enneagram Personality Test


    Enneagram Test Results
    Type 1 Perfectionism |||| 17%
    Type 2 Helpfulness |||||| 24%
    Type 3 Ambition |||||| 21%
    Type 4 Sensitivity |||||||||| 38%
    Type 5 Detachment |||||| 21%
    Type 6 Anxiety |||||||||| 32%
    Type 7 Adventurousness |||||||||| 35%
    Type 8 Hostility |||||||||| 32%
    Type 9 Calmness |||||| 25%
    Your Conscious-Surface type is 4
    Your Unconscious-Overall type is 6w7
    Take Free Enneagram Personality Test

    <------ there... happy?

    (take my hand)

    Men grow cold as girls grow old and we all lose our charms in the end   
    11:13pm 30/10/2003
    mood: awake
    music: diamonds are a girls best friend
    I have no corodination. I am all well uncordinated. It is not good. especially since today I got to play with an eyetoy and there was witnesses to my badness, I was showing up girls everwhere. There shall eb gamers out there crying for me blood so I do not humiliate the girl kind futher. Ah well you know what? I may not be able to tell my left from my right but I can spout at least 3 pieces of feminist propganda on cue. And yah I am proud of that. Tis good for debating. Especially mobile phone debates. lol. Thankgod for Emily Pankhurst *salutes* who got to fight for womans rights and be miltant. I a violent apparently, the proof of this being grandtheft auto were I kill everything. Tis it's own fault it should have moved!!! But if I was so violent would I have went to see fidning Nemo?! NO!! Well yah maybes, since there was explosions and to quote Steven very loudly in a cinema full of 5 year olds " STONERS!" Um how fun. I am so Dory. In fact her memory might be better than mine, except I am thinking I might remember big giant jellyfish. Then again you never know...The ring is on tonight!! Tis apparently more scary on tv than the new version. I am hoping so, since I want to be scared smart!!! *gets tape ready and sits in anticipating manner* ooooohh stargate, hehe distractedness. I am rather bouncy. That would be my mood but I have already used that and I am original!!! I dun think I am gonna check for mistakes of the spelling kind for I do believe there will be too many for contability plus they always correct my grammer. Which takes forever since I have none. My mum and dad were in serious discussion mode this afternoon. They wanted to talk about my not eating real food but chocolate insteadness.... apparently that merits a trip to the docotrs. hey so long as I get out of french.... damn me for picking it.... anyone wanna sawap? I am willing to do any subject but it? please? Fine then. I'm going!! HMPH.

    Take the test, by Emily.


    (take my hand)

    You left me for dead so far away I replaced you with fear and shame you'll be happy on the day I die   
    05:00am 20/10/2003
    mood: listless
    music: stupid kid- alkaline trio
    an hour in the life of Lauran

    4:00 the hour in the life Of Lauran begins
    4:01 looks at blank screen
    4:02 types what happened during 4:01
    4:04 looks at the wall
    4;05 hears msn beep
    4:07 answers message
    4:10 is mind numbingly bored
    4:11 realises she has homework
    4:11 and 15 seconds realises she doesn't care
    4:15 realises no one will read this
    4:16 realises even she won't read this
    4:17 wonders if people will get the irony oh the irony?
    4:18 gives up on an hour in the life of Lauran
    4:20 see above
    4:25 see above
    4:30 see above
    4:40 see above
    4:50 see above
    5:00 and so concludes an hour in the life of Lauran

    hehe farewell

    (2 led me astray | take my hand)

    I could write a stupid love song, and sing it all across the world, but it wouldn't mean a thing...   
    03:40pm 19/10/2003
    mood: amused
    music: the ataris- that special girl.
    I was at Alton of the towers kind. Yah it was fun fun. Big fun fun. And no I did not go on evil scary, not so fun fun rides. Because I am a wimp, but I am proud of it!! Go wimp power? I went on that game dual though, and realised I am the least violent person in my family. This is because I refused to shoot the witches, on the whole principle thing. Others are under the impression it is because they move far too fast and I just couldn't hit them but I know better, I know it was my principles. MY PRICIPLES. Ummm yeh *shifty eyes*. I was at Linzi's 18th last night. It t'was okies, except you know she doesn't really like me lol. Also the tables were against me they were. 3 drinks fell on me!!! I am glad to say they were all of the non alcoholic variety but still I was like drenched and couldn't move lol. and now my jeans have this big coke stain, I have tried washing them but it won't come out lol. The ever wonderful syme and Steven made fun of me today. *sniff*. With the aid of a mobile they sent me a message about finally finding shoes. Something I shalt never understand. Although they are apparently now called Graham. And apologies to Syme for the sounding like Logie comment. lol. However I am now amused much, and homework is passing much quicker. well okies, it's not. But still..... Is it just me or am I always doing homework? Damn my easily distractedness. Now, I shall work. *determined face* wish me luck....

    You fell in love and got hurt. Whether your
    significant other cheated or just didn't like
    you, your not dealing well. Chances are you'd
    do anything to get him/her, or maybe you
    just can't wait to rip their throat out. Cheer
    up kid, get over it. There's other fish in the

    What's your phobia?
    brought to you by Quizilla


    (take my hand)

    sleep with all the lights on. your not so happy. your not secure.   
    03:41pm 14/10/2003
    mood: lazy
    music: swiss army romance:- dashboard
    okies I admit it, work done so far?

    In our investigative drama our group chose to explore the theme of anger. The over all message of the piece was “nice guys finish last”.

    I am a big non working person...



    (take my hand)

    The hint of these new tears are sharp I try to choke them back. But its useless...   
    02:30pm 14/10/2003
    mood: productive
    music: The sharp hint of new tears- dashboard
    I am doing homework. I am good pupil studious type girl....okies I admit it I am not doing homework. My drama essay plan is sat in front of me. I have too much homework so I should be doing it but meh! That is all I have to say on the subject of homework. And that I have to read 2 plays and all the notes that go with it this week. If I had a life I would be very angry at their destruction of my socialness. But I don't. Which is just as well because they wouldn't want angry me. Because angry me is scary, grr. Did you see the grr highlighting the scariness? Umm yeh. It is *points at time* I have only been up an hour. Which is weird since last night I fell asleep at one. I sleep too much. It is official. I am not lazy though. No matter what me parents say. I am clearly suffering from an iron deficiency, which causes me to be tired all the time!!!! My computer is all slow today. Maybe it's tired too. I don't think my computer gets any iron so it had a definite excuse. I should talk to my father about the fact he neglects to give our computer vital vitamins. Most certainly. Right I shall go do some homework now...


    (take my hand)

    Don't follow your heart cause it just seems to get in your way.   
    04:12pm 12/10/2003
    mood: lonely
    music: drowning dashboard confessional
    I was all ill and stuff most of yesterday afternoon which kinda sucked alot because I could have went into town with Amie. This clearly would have been a great deal of fun. And most likely would have involved Lenore and strange people staring at us in Mc Donalds. So yah. I was feeling kindas better by nighty time and went round to Stevens, where Fiona hid in a wardrobe and I found out I am a rather unconvincing liar. Which I guess I already knew considering my mum never believes me. I am also not a very good thug and I think I have disappointed Syme, especially since I would punch anyone... so apologies. I will be more violent in future or you know just ask someone to be violent for me!! However I can play the intro to radio :) go me I have exceptionally limited musical talent!! It's a dream come true. lol. Still at least from now on when I am being ignored in favour of the ps2 or guitars I will have something to do. That at least makes me look like I belong among the artistic people I seem to hang around with... I am bored, and lonely. See the loneliness? The loneliness is there. I was gonna rent final fantasy x yesterday afternoon, BUT my little sister has deleted the data!! And starting from the beginning doesn't sound like fun to me.... however now with the boredom I wish I had. I have a ton of homework I could do and like a million plays to read but bah. Nah thankyou!! I think I will phone my mum and dad and ask very nicely if they would mind stopping off and renting me that wonderful game final fantasy. I am sure they shall not turn little old me down. After all I am their eldest daughter. They shall not have the pleasure of my company for much longer. Yeh okies I am convincing no one not even myself. Ama gonna stop trying but I'll phone them anyways. This is a matter of life and death it is!! Life and death! *phones* They said yah. So my boredom will go away. Still lonely though. lol. okies I think I shall give ya a quiz... I would like to point out this quiz was in most popular and I am bored.
    when harry met sally
    Everyone remembers the 'faked-orgasm-in-a-deli'
    sequence from your kind of movie When Harry Met
    Sally. It seems that you're falling for a buddy
    or have already fallen for them. Uh-oh. You're
    probably caught between the possibility of
    having a great relationship and wrecking the
    one you have now. You know what they say, it's
    better to regret something you did than
    something you didn't do.

    What Romance Movie Best Represents Your Love Life?
    brought to you by Quizilla


    (2 led me astray | take my hand)

    You were the last good thing I ever saw... I lost it all   
    12:05am 05/10/2003
    mood: sleepy
    music: cringe... alkaline trio.
    I am kinda refusing to update until I have something important to say but I realised that moment may never come. and I have a public to cater too. well okies I don't but it makes me feel special. I quite clearly have a borderline personality disorder. Not that this is anything to worry about because everyone has a boderline personality disorder. So I guess their not disorders. As you can tell it's late, so you are being subjected to Laurans late night semi intelligible, semi philosophical ramblings. For example just as I was drifting off to sleep last night I realised that my life is like a plastic bag that has been dragged from the safety of the supermarket out into a tempestuous day. I don't feel this needs to be explained. Well maybes it does but I am not the girl to do it. me plus expaining is as bad as me plus PE and we all know how that goes... well if this is my entry it is done. you can't say I didn't at least try. I think I will go to bed now I clearly need it... which is strange I went to bed early ( 11!!!) and woke up late.... and I am now exhausted. I have decided I sleep way too much. It must be the teenage thing or the laziness thing. I am banking on lazty but "I am a teenager" is a good excuse. It doesn't work though... I have warned my sister off that excuse. I feel I was doing my duty as a sister warning her it didn't work..... see? I am a good sister. Does that scream evil? no. No it does not. in ths whole cat situation I am the good guy. Carlyn is on my side. CARLYN!!! Their could not be a person less evil than Carlyn.... she is the epitome of non-evilness. I am appaently being watched though. I found this funny. I am thinking no one else did. It was the scrubs reference that got them. Everyone should be a scrubs fan... and yet.... I am kinda annoying when I am sleepy. luckily Blurty entries can be deleted. lol. I think I should get off msn though before I damage beyond repair.... what this entry needs is a quiz!!!! here ya go...

    As much as someone has destroyed
    themselves, I still cared about them.
    Now they're gone and I'm still living
    in the past. I think they are all I ever
    had in the world, but it's not so.

    What Goddamnit song are you?


    (4 led me astray | take my hand)

    in case you haven't heard I'm sick and tired of trying...   
    09:33pm 25/09/2003
    mood: bouncy
    music: alkaline trio... Radio :D
    Let it be know:

    Ginny says: (20:57:37)
    u hav gud mood? *shocked face*

    I guess I'm giving up on love, cause it really kind of sucks... says: (20:57:42)
    I do :D

    And do you know why? Go on guess.... nopes.... not that either.... Alkaline trio?? Yuh huh!!!!!! Well done two cookies and brownie points for you. I can temporarily forget the harrowing experience that is the daily torture Kirky puts me through in order to obtain my cat (it’s a key ring before you start…), I can forget the abundance of homework, I can forget the fact I am being harassed by 2nd year boys.... and dance!!! Because I saw alkaline trio. I don't think I need to describe any further than that. Nopes I don't. I managed to get very and extremely near the front, unfortunately so did some beer drinking man/girl (it’s the hair I tell you) who decided to throw the cup... we of course got splash back. So my corset smells like beer. Of course then insane event manager people soaked us all... Why is it they never soak you in the middle of the concert when your dying but they soak you during the support acts?? I am glad to say I did not boo the second support people. I felt sorry for them. Everyone was expecting alkaline trio so.... But still I was extremely happy (understatement of the century) to see the wonderful, fantastic.... err prettiful alkaline trio heart come up. I think I nearly passed out from lack of breathing during private eye, between jumping, shouting the words (since it can hardly be called singing) and dancing (yes that's right dancing... only alkaline trio and the threat of physical harm from a certain person could make me do it). They didn't play mr chainsaw or stupid kid!!!! Buuuutttttt they did end with Radio.... the best way to end errmm ever considering everyone knows the words and loves that apparently Amie looks like a princess. Old woman on the train (yes we got the train.. the bus would have been easier I know.... guess how often I've heard that today?) quote pending:
    "Oohhh my wee grand daughter would love that... 'Cause she has to look like a princess" in between disapproving looks of course. Also I met Sarah’s friend Martin aka Hurley kid... I like him, he be funny and very nice. And he is buying me a motorbike :D which is clearly what I need so yah.. Amazing. Amazing, amazing amazing…. Did I mention alkaline trio were amazing???? Didn’t think so. :D.

    You're Perfect ^^
    -Perfect- You're the perfect girlfriend.

    uummm woo?

    (5 led me astray | take my hand)

    don't you think I know exactly where I stand? This world is forcing me to hold your hand....   
    03:12pm 21/09/2003
    mood: tired
    music: no doubt- just a girl
    I will write this entry and write it right. I make no sense today. AT ALL. I have written this like 3 times and it still doesn't sound like real english. I know nothing I ever write sounds like real english but this is a particularly awful brand of Lauran making no sense. I can't even type right. This spiralling out of control it is!!! I blame my sister. I am not sure why but it is most likely she is to blame. She is keeping me off the computer too much. I have also forgotten everything I was going to say so... yeh. This week has been uneventful. we are the furthest ahead in drama, which is alwasy good because we were last before so yah for us. Plus I get to be god. :D. For anyone who might read this that has been forced to hear about my hunt of a costume for god aka Steven, I have finally found one :). A white mesh skirt of fairy likeness ( like the one for my halloween costume..) a black top ( just you try and stop me.... apparently I can't wear black unless it's funky.... it just makes no sense black is not a funky colour and how can colour be funky??) my docs and fishnets..... errr yeh god dresses strange I also wanted a feather boa but that doesn't seem to be happening. But you never know..... *yawns* so tired.....I believe I should put a quiz to make up for this..... here
    Season = Autumn
    You're Most Like The Season

    fare thee well

    (6 led me astray | take my hand)

    I've got a bad case of broken heart. And you're the only one that's got the cure.   
    04:05pm 11/09/2003
    mood: confused
    music: bad case of the broken heart... the Ataris
    My mum and dad had to take my sister to the opticians so for one brief shining moment I was a latch key kid. Of course the one day I am a latch key kid, meaning yahness msn!!! No one is on. Not one person. Except my little sisters friend who thinks I am just a wee bitty unbalanced. Which of course would be right lol. I may be driven to do my homework if no one comes on in the next 15 mins.... that's right homework. If I am gone when you come on I hope you know this is your fault... so anyways I think ama supposed to tell you whats been going on of late, erm nothing much. Drama started back t'was fun fun as always. And Grewar is never coming back ever with the full stop ending and all. See? Did you see the full stop ending? Matt and Calvin and him fell out. Ooooh the difference in stories. Grewar says he fell out with them, and Calvin.. er the opposite. Of course the point in going into drama is erm none because no one will have a clue what ama talking about. But I might as well add this. WE ARE BEING OUT NUMBERED!!!! We need saving. Shelley has successfully indoctrinated (lol.... makes us sound like Hitler youth)(I maybe paid too much attention is history) (maybe no that's a definite) (I didn't pay enough attention in English at all though... I should) 2 people into our group... but we are still outnumbered. Ummm yeh... that is sorra big deal. If you care please ask and I will be only too glad to explain. We have temporarily escaped language in English. We are on to Othello. We got to watch a fun fun cartoon that involved Othello changing colour alot and *is confused* putting his hand in fire... without burning or going on fire. That's suspicious if you ask me. Or maybe I just jealous that I can't have fiery fun. The play ended when erm everyone got stabbed. Except for Othello’s wife who got strangled for having an affair when she was clearly was no. The proof of the affair being a handkerchief. I think that says enough about Shakespeare. OOOh finally people are on lol. I now talk.

    Farewell for now...

    (take my hand)