Blurty for Katie is for lovers........!.

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Saturday, November 27th, 2004

(2 Said she was beautiful | She wants to hear shes beautiful)

Time:8:33 am.


Friday, November 26th, 2004

(1 Said she was beautiful | She wants to hear shes beautiful)

Subject:friends only
Time:3:01 pm.
Mood: cold.
Music:faggot- msi.
from now on this journal is friends only.

all entries after this.

Thursday, November 25th, 2004

(2 Said she was beautiful | She wants to hear shes beautiful)

Subject:I am exhumed, just a little less silver and a lot more bitter and cold.
Time:8:11 pm.
Mood: cold.
Music:lipgloss and black- atreyu.
sigh.home.sigh. i cant even type or think, i hate myself more than words could ever explain, i look in the mirror and see a ugly person with all these beautiful scars. sigh. wow. i SUCK. im horrible, i cant stand living anymore. i wish i had the balls to do something about it though.

until then,

(1 Said she was beautiful | She wants to hear shes beautiful)

Subject:at b-rand's
Time:4:38 pm.
Mood: confused.
Music:take me out, franz ferdinand.
okay, participating in a joyful anit social thanksgiving here @ brandon and camerons house. i wish i had a camera because i could take pictures, theyve got some awful nice house features. sigh. i suck, yeah. wow. okay.......sigh. im going to DIE. yep, die. asap.


my chelsea is pictured above, im so happy to have hot friends, who are hotter than me.

yeah, im off like a dress on prom night.
^yeah, im cool.

Tuesday, November 23rd, 2004

(1 Said she was beautiful | She wants to hear shes beautiful)

Subject:Behind blue eyes.
Time:4:21 pm.
Mood: angry.
Music:Jack of Jill.
gosh. gosh. gosh. i cant even talk. i cant even think. i dont want to talk or think or write or explain to one more fucking person why i cant smile. im sick of it. all of it.

consider this a pre suicide note.

your lovely fucktard,

damn, i wish i was prettier.

Sunday, November 21st, 2004

(1 Said she was beautiful | She wants to hear shes beautiful)

Subject:this is me.
Time:12:38 pm.
Mood: apathetic.
Music:no music, just crying..
this is what i am. your eyes

why wont you just tell me already

Nick, below

beautiful autumn leaves.

gosh, reminders of all sorts.

okay, I am obsessed

Saturday, November 20th, 2004

(She wants to hear shes beautiful)

Subject: I LOVE YOU
Time:6:00 pm.
Mood: discontent.
Music:Dash fucking board..
Love )

gosh. love. hate. kill. her. nick. love. alex. wonderful. hungry. cut. blood. emotions. die. suicide. blades. knives. hearts. guns. cross. love. beauty. I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO!


you )


sigh, cut again. I LOVE NN. on right hip. sigh, what the hell am i suppose to do? i do get it. Will someone like tell nick to love me? im sick of waiting. will someone want me? gosh. I NEED IT. you know what i mean. someone....alex? < you...want me? gosh. im starting to think, im worthless and no one wants me or needs me, but at the same time i want and need everyone else. there is something wrong with me, something really wrong.

the little girl who wants to die,

(She wants to hear shes beautiful)

Time:2:54 pm.
Mood: cold.
Music:Tiger Army, because it reminds me of nick...bad..
I love you.

I do not have anything else to say. i talked to nick online, and it all comes back. i talk to alex online and it all keeps coming.

i love nick.

alex is amazing.

but what to do now?! sooo confused.

(2 Said she was beautiful | She wants to hear shes beautiful)

Subject:This is where I call you and tell you i love you and good-bye.
Time:7:38 am.
Mood: gloomy.
Music:Something Corporate, Let me save you..
And I cried, I cried all day. Just to see what it was like too.

When will it be good? I need someone, someone who cares to be right here. Ah, I don't think ive stopped crying since last night. I woke up and my face was all sore and wet and i was still crying, I went down stairs at 6:30am and i was crying. I still am crying. I just don't know what else to do? I cut yesterday, and the day before. It felt so good, so much better. But I didnt do it heavy, like i use too. I dont want to be that bad anymore, so maybe crying and writing is the only way to relieve it? sigh, i dont know. I ripped up nicks picture, and burned it and threw the ashes out the window. I dont need him anymore, he brings me down. but at the same time......He doesnt. gosh. I do love nick, as a person. Ive you know me, you know i dont love that many people AT ALL. for me to care about you, is like...a regular chick to care about 10 guys. sigh. there really isnt anything good going on right now except for alex. hes amazing. <3. I need to clear things up to everyone. I do NOT have a crush on nick. I love nick. I love him like i love joseph, who is one of my good friends. but i just love nick so much more. to the max. I have a CRUSH on alex, because he's so wonderful and awesome. He's so nice, and just AHHH honestly gives me an orgasmic feeling. and its nice. and i love liking him. I think about him constantly. hes the only person in 4 months to have gotten me to stop liking nick. bravo alex. bravo. but now i like him, sigh i wonder if hes bothered by it. sigh. i do not know. i just cant help hating myself. Last night when i was crying in bed i was wishing alex was there to there. there is everything to hate. everything. I'm a horrible complaining person, reason i switched journals. i lost juli for complaining, i lost ashley and megan and everyone else, but also that was because of other shit too. sigh. man. what to do?! i wish.....i wish......i wish i was just likeable or loveable. someone everyone could enjoy. i need a kiss. badley. i need someone who wants to give me one to come here. sigh, okay. enough ranting.



the ugly girl everyone hates dies finally with cheers,

Friday, November 19th, 2004

(1 Said she was beautiful | She wants to hear shes beautiful)

Subject:And we will fall, forever this time....
Time:5:09 pm.
Mood: sad.
Music:No music, just yelling..
Ah. School. Ah. Cailin came back from cailifornia today, which was awesome. sooo happy. soo extremely happy. she made my day. since everyone was horrible towards me today, and i mean horrible. Mad mean, but anyways....ill tell you the story of my day.

I woke up, I showered, I put on my Ect. And then i got my shit together, and thankfully found and wore my FAVORITEST sweartshirt. sexay. yes, and then walked a mile. mhm. went to school. sat around with everyone outside. yep. then classes. then it started to suck, because everyone was just SO mean to me. yep. gosh, horrible. no reason really, i didnt have classes with emily or like any of my REAL friends. sigh. anyways. Ashley bilbo sucks. yeah, she does. Then lunch, rocko thought itd be funny to take a blade and cut my pants. my FAVORITE pants. one of my few pairs of pants. gawwwwwd. sigh, anyways. Classes again, sucked? yes. but people finally noticed i was on the verge of tears, and some people/friends decided to care. sigh. then after school redgate hooked me up with a smoke. hes so pretty. sigh. then my dad decided to yell at me some more. yeah, he sucks. Then i got home and cried, because im so lame like that. Then i got yelled at some more. I hate getting yelled at, i never even do anything wrong...or maybe i do everything wrong. I bet thats the thing. Maybelline was so cute today, and chelsea got a good picture of me. yay. the best thing was cailin being here. i miss her, shes been one of my bestfriends...the truest ive had for the longest. yeah. sigh. yeah. dads yelling at me now, because im on the computer. blah. this is all sucking. everything......godsh. sigh. im updating this now. so lets see, my family finally stopped and slowed down. breathed in. gosh. i hate it sometimes. anyways, im in a better mood now. which is good. thought about how alex rocks so hard, and how i love nick. just a general love, but different. gosh. nick. gosh alex. this is alll soooo confusing. what to feel? what to think? feeling guilty? nick, he's just special. i just love him. i just hate him. i just feel soooo fucking much for him, and i want him to feel for me...SOOO bad. why doesnt he? gawwwd. then alex man, hes just wonderful. AMAZING....the feelings he gives me. so fuckin happy. man. im just confused. i feel guilty for liking alex, and at the same time loving nick. man. i do love nick. but damn he probably wants me dead. ever since i saw him a couple weeks ago at the show. i havent let it go, beautiful. yes. beautiful. man. i dont even know what to say. should i feel guilty? feel bad? i dont want alex to like me any less, because i have the strongest love for nick?. i think he might. but i dunno. i sure hope not. man, but blah. so yeahhhh. did i mention, i offically hate myself? yeah i do. sigh. lots of things are going wrong. will someone just come back here and hold me? someone. okay....i want a heart felt good paragraph of things for me. anything, but it needs to be long. make me happy? please. i need that. sigh.



pretty girl hides in the corner


Thursday, November 18th, 2004

(2 Said she was beautiful | She wants to hear shes beautiful)

Subject:I want you to want me, I need you to need me
Time:8:56 pm.
Mood: loved.
Music:MODEST MOUSE, yeah thats love it!!.
ahh. tomorrows friday. yay. i love fridays. they are so nice, always good. excited because i found my awesome jacket, sweatshirt thing. its black, and has pins on it. so sexay. yeah, it is. well, I'm wearing this really retro spiral bracelet type thing, and its really cool...its the coolest color blue ive ever seen in my life. sigh. mad awesome. I've been working on my guitar, yeah. guitar. sigh. If you havent heard the song, Heartbreaker by Led Zeppelin. You haven't lived. The solo in that, its....its...amazing. im working on it. gawwwh. yeah. I'm really looking forward to next weeks break. Yay. I'll probably end up doing nothing, but oh well...its still time off. which is always good. I feel like listening to Dashboard, for really no reason. just a random urge. sigh. weird, arent i? gawd. Paris Hiltons so hot. yeah, she is. I'd do her. Instantly. I got my school pictures the other day, i havent brought them home yet. they are SOOOOO ugly. the horrible. ahhh. i look like a pirate. And my school ID, sigh. anyways, i forgot to add that a while ago. Just to let you all know whats going on. Ooh! someone stole my art project, it was just amazing....Black and White photographs, and collaged. It was like no one elses. Everyone else used paints. I used pictures. (pictures are so much better). yeah. welll.....someone stole it. and it made me REALLY sad yesterday. I wanted to cry, because i put so much time into it. Then no one seemed to care. Sigh. I hate Julie, i hate her. i dont hate anyone but her. gosh. she needs to die, like really soon. Nick needs to be shot for ever associating with her. Actually, whoever introduced them needs to be shot. yep. them. gosh anyways. alex, hes wonderful. I know i keep repeating myself. but im all smiled when it comes to him. saying his name, im just like...*grin*. hah. Blah, im really bored. Im searching for something to post, cause i love making people answer questions. So im going to find some to post, and then shower again....naked and want to be here dont you?! laughs. So yeah, comment.


the beautifully ugly girl withers away,
katie. ! .

how much do you like me:
what band is me to you:
Some lyrics about me:
A quote:
Words of wisdom:
Black and white or color:
classic beauty or sexy beauty:
a celebrity reminding you of me:
an animal:
Top five things you want to do to me:
Were you honest:
Ever lied to me:
Ever wanted to tell me something, but didnt:
Trust me with anything:
Ever thought I could help you:
Make your life better:
(i put the next question in, replacing the last one, because it was so sucky)
Who rocks the hardest:

<333, i know those are annoying, but i ADORE them.

J'amie tu.


(1 Said she was beautiful | She wants to hear shes beautiful)

Subject:you rock harder.
Time:6:14 pm.
Mood: cheerful.
Music:tiger army gives me orgasms.

ahh sigh. alex. sigh, hes so wonderful and nice and amazing. beautiful too. sigh. gosh. i feel like a little kid, like a little kid after they got off for the first time. sigh, that good.i sent him a picture of me that said like, she wants to hear shes beautiful and he said-
quiet x pattern: she's beautiful <3
. sigh. i feel like such a dork. i dunno why. hes just. sigh. man. i wish he was mine. :-X. yes. i do. sigh. wonderful feelings, they are so good. so happy. im never really happy. so was odd. i got shit on by a bird. yelled at multiple times. kal went home sick, kelseys a fuck. ashley was soooo mean to me. sigh, why do i care. and oh tom. yeah. i dont even wanna begin. barf. anyways. alex thought about him a lot today. i wonder if he thinks about much as i about him. sigh. thatd be cool if he did. smiles. well. i dunno what to really say anymore. sigh. this is all like, i dunno. a weird nice good vibe orgasmic feeling i havent felt in a while. gosh. i wonder if alex really has the feelings, i wonder if they are the same. but hes so wonderful, hes probably got a million girls where he is. sigh. man. gosh. eeek. chelsea forgot her camera today, shes bringing it tomorrow. sigh, i want him to hold me. sigh. i suck. gosh. blah. i want him. gosh. to be mine. meh. ahh alright. enough of this pointless never-come-true dream ranting. <333. COMMENT.



heres some things i like, remind me of different people

in sighs and cries the beautiful girl dies.

(1 Said she was beautiful | She wants to hear shes beautiful)

Time:4:19 pm.
Mood: anxious.
Music:library tunes.
Alex rocks so hard.

cant stop thinking about him. so awesome.

soooooo awesome. soooooo sexy. soooo everything.


Wednesday, November 17th, 2004

(2 Said she was beautiful | She wants to hear shes beautiful)

Subject:"Motha fucka pull ease, my shits custom." < gotta say, thats the best line.
Time:7:28 pm.
Mood: bouncy.
Music:Taking back sunday....sigh, still....<3.

I felt the need to update. Oh gosh. Some people just rock so hard. Chelsea does. Emily does. Christina does. Alex definatly does. Nick does. Keria does. Lindsey does. Owen does. George does. Anissa does. Seth does. Joseph does. Redgate does. So does Jason. ETC. ahh. gosh. what going on? sigh. i dont know. my moms making me cookies, because i felt the need to inquire that she make some for me. I would make them myself, but she doesnt trust me to make them right. considering the last time i did, which was making ryland cookies...i burned them. sigh. i would post a really cute picture of me right about now, but dotphoto aint doin' shit for me. sigh. my sisters auditioning for the All Cape Chorus today, and i really hope she gets in. sigh. god, so many fuckin sighs. maybe if people would just....ARGH. i better? at life? laughs, just kidding. I dunno. Man, Alex rocks so hard. < id bold that, but that would just be annoying probably. but....its important enough to bold...just so you all know. laughs. Chelseas bringing her camera tomorrow, which is awesome. NEW pictures. < oh look, i bolded that. sigh. man. Ian Tallmidge is soooooooo hot. gosh, but hes an asshole....i think its just cause hes super awesome and wears girls pants. Thats what makes him hot. Sigh. Ya know whats sexy? sXe boys. the ones who draw X's on their hands. gosh. it seems tons of people get horny at shows, ive decided that. the whole atmosphere. sigh. and the sXe boys. fuck-sigh. yes....a fuck sigh. laughs, some day ill show you all what a fuck-sigh sounds like. Meh. i mean it though, like everytime i go to a show....probably 30% or more, are like....totally turned on. and i am one of those 30%+. laughs, now dont you wish you could go to a show with me?! *raises eyebrow* who knows what will happen, eh? eh? haha. gosh. haha, man i love writing. it helps me so much, sigh. yeah. gosh. i have no cigarettes. oh well, i should maybe quit anyways....when chelsea quits...i quit too! no fair, shes getting her lip pierced MAD week during vacation i think. sigh. thats so uber man. i remember when i had my labret pierced. kal told me today i should re-pierce it again. gosh, i dunno i wanna. but everyone would think that i was copying kelsey. gosh. i dont even wanna think about her. my ears hurt from streching them more. aahhh. pain. gosh, i havent cut in a while actually. i luckily havent had a reason too. sigh. smiles. alex smiles. mehh ekkk. gawww. sex. hah. sigh, anyways. And i would like NOT to be dissed for thinking about him anymore...unless its annoying...if its annoying you have to tell me. I HATE being annoying. i really do hate it. gosh. maybe ill pierce my labret tonight. maybe? sigh, i dunno. i need to re-paint my nails. i think ill do radical retro colors, like neon organge, lime green, hot pink, and fuscia? or maybe deep purple insteed of fuscia. ya think? meh. that'll be so cool. like...WICKED cool?. i feel like painting. ive got a canvas set up in the loft. maybe ill paint something, i havent painted something in a while....a long while. actually a months while. im sure you all are bored. im a boring person, eh? yes. i am. oh well, if you are reading this you must think im not a boring person. haha. thanks then. Hmm. speaking about reading, you all need to read these books.

Dharma Punx
Nothing Feels Good
Hardcore Zen
The Perks of being a Wallflower
Beauty Queen
Someone like you
Dance of days

Most of them are about music or drugs, or music and drugs....cept someone like you. its about love. sigh. im a sappy shit. ahhhhh. intense. gosh. okay, well.....alex !!!!!!!.....!!!!!....!!!!!!!!. < feelings. emotions. sigh. im such a god damn mother fucking loser. i cant believe it. sigh. well, this is sexy....RIGHT HERE- i have it on my wall....cept bigger....its so me at least, i have the picture, without the words. the sXe hands, are so sexy.

yeah you love it, eh?

well i must go to eat my cookies, and shower...get all naked and wet and hot. < yeah i know you wish you were here. well, COMMENT FOOLS!!!

^thats for you.

and the beautiful girl cries some more.
your Katie. !


UpThePunks999: hey
diet coke cancer: ^
diet coke cancer: hey.
UpThePunks999: can i ask a ?
diet coke cancer: okay.
UpThePunks999: are you an alex going out?
diet coke cancer: hahhaa. why do you ask that?
UpThePunks999: well i just read one if his comments on your blurty
UpThePunks999: and you both seem to like each oth

(3 Said she was beautiful | She wants to hear shes beautiful)

Subject:This is some tune by taking back sunday. i dont know. sigh.
Time:5:41 pm.
Mood: loved.
Music:taking back sunday, STILL!!!.
school. boo. schoool. i woke up this morning, thinking it was saturday. oh boy i wish it was. the long weekend next week should be good, actually its more like a vacation. no school wednesday-sunday. sigh. yes, its a good thing. but at the same time...a bad thing. there will be a lot of time for thinking, and sigh. too much thinking = too many tears for katie. i dont know why i get sad so much. this isnt good. but oh well. anyways, today was a weird day. a very weird day. all started out this morning. i was so rushed, i quickly grabbed a cd. and when i was walking to the bus stop i turned on my music and it was taking back sunday?!?! yep. i cant remember the last time i listened to them. all i could think about was alex. they remind me of him. it was nice. then the bus stop was so weird. my sisters a shit., blah regular day. Nothing really much. Emily wasnt in school today, and it made me sad. Lunch was weird, Keiras jackets so rad. I want it. its so dirty and scrubby. sexcellant. then i had latin, blah. LATIN. who the hell likes latin? *hides* I <3 latin. and for some reason i thought about alex in latin too. then in english. writing always gets me thinking, literature as well. it was so weird, emotions drive me crazy. i dunno. EMOTIONS. i dont even know which emotions to pick. Happy, YES. Sad, NO. blah. i get all little kid happy. its so weird. anyways, after school....blah. nothing really. i dont really like redgate anymore, not like that at least....cept, he's pretty. sigh. i was so angry with a lot of people today. gawh. thinking about alex a lot, this is so nice...its intense and amazing....thinking about him. its all those things, amazing, nice, and awesomely intense. sigh. alright, well....i think im going to go online...or something. comment, PLEASE?! thanks.

<3alex. :o)

and beautiful crys start to cry,

Tuesday, November 16th, 2004

(7 Said she was beautiful | She wants to hear shes beautiful)

Subject:The end of the cycle is closing in, with you i see new i begin again.
Time:6:29 pm.
Mood: nerdy.
Music:From Cailifornia, The New Amsterdams.
Ah. Oh jeez. What an intense day, eh? So yeah. blah. stayed home today...too emo to go to school. haha i suck. didnt really do anything. sat around. gosh. sigh. im a deep thinker, eh? ive been really thinking about alex a lot, then nick. but different. sigh. i talked with alex online today, gosh it was so intense. i was seriously going to cry. but not cry in a bad way. sigh blah. then dad came home. he yelled at me a lot, a lot, a lot. loudly and he was angry for no reason. he got right up in my face and stuff. and of course...then i cried. and once i start....all the emotions just run with it. he finally left to walk the dog. i went upstairs, opened my window and got onto my roof. went to a not so steep part and cried. got into an oh so emo position. and cried. like- knees tucked into chest, head bowed down, and arms around knees...holding myself tight. all these thoughts running through my head. like, " wtf is wrong with me that dad always has to yell at me", "why do my parents hate so much", " why doesnt nick tell me he loves me", "why do i have all these feelings, and want Alex so bad and just hold him and kiss him so bad". shit dudes, why do i always have to be thinking? damn. i wonder if alex really does think im pretty. no, not pretty. beautiful. i wonder if hes thinking about me in the same way im thinking about him. gosh. i just get this feeling all over my body. sigh. like that feeling when you wake up on a summer morning and it all just seems so right. or that feeling right after sex. sigh. thats what i feel when i think about him. gosh, he probably thinks im scary. he never seems to enjoy talking to me, as much and i enjoy talking to him. i wonder if he thinks about me as much as i think about him?. sigh. i want someone to think about me just as much or more than the amount i think of them. sigh. commment please.

i wish,

i do love nick
i do have feelings for alex
and no ones got shit for me.

Monday, November 15th, 2004

(2 Said she was beautiful | She wants to hear shes beautiful)

Subject:Katie is the color of your aura.
Time:8:43 pm.
Mood: awake.
ahh. alex. i cant help it. thinking about you is whats making me happy. i dunno why. but it is. giving me this weird feeling, weird but nice and stuff...what're you feeling? and im getting this crazy intense heart pounding sensation. its all so weird. but its making me happy. this is all so crazy. i want to cry. just cry, because its too much to handle. agh. this = insane. all so insane. man, how do i deal with this? all these feelings, building up inside. all these emotions running high. all these different things running through my veins, and my mind. all of it is so insane. its so stressful. i want something so bad. i want so many different people. i want it all. and i want to cry. curl up and go to sleep, and cry and listen to music. play my guitar, the guitar im so good at. the guitar ive played for five years. oh gosh. now ive gotten myself all worked up for nothing.

"Why do you build me up, buttercup, baby just to let me down."

Yeah, thats for you darling. you had to build me up to thinking i was something special. ahh. i always do this...WHY. i take everything so personally, and im like obsessed with this journal. it all sucks so hard. gosh. i need you all to help me, and talk to me and tell me something....anything...a good long paragraph of emotion just for me. i want that. okay, go forth now...and comment and give me my emotion and heartfelt words.

Sigh. one more-

sorry i really love these things. please do it, whoever. blah. meaning you....i copy and paste these from stupid sites.....i <3 them
copy and paste in a comment.

1)My name:
2)Your name:
3)Your age:
4)What do you think about me:
5)Do you think about me a lot:
6)More than 10 times a day:
7)Think about me in bed:
8)While you sleep:
9)At school or work:
10)Would you hug me:
11)Would you kiss me:
12)Would you really kiss me:
13)Would you fuck me:
14)Would you listen to me:
15)No matter what:
16)You're in a room with me, do anything you want:
17)Did you really say what you wanted to do:
18)Say something to make me happy:
19)Label me:
20)Give me some advice:
21)Describe my looks in a sentence:
22)Describe my personality in a sentence:
23)Are you bored:
24)Gonna post in your journal:
25)Hate these post things:

im all hot and bothered now....wink. smile.

ALEX, if you were here. id give you a kiss. because. i do care for you. <333
(i love being all simple and makes me feel cool....blah. i try so hard hah)

bye beautiful girl,

something to pass the time-

[ Current Clothes ] sweatshirt, plaid pants. and honestly thats it.
[ Current Mood ] Bored
[ Current Music ] Radio
[ Current Taste ] Cherry Coke
[ Current Make-up ] eyeliner, conceler
[ Current Hair ] brown
[Current Annoyance ] Kal's sn.
[ Current Smell ] waffles
[ Current thing I ought to be doing ] work, dishes, cleaning
[ Current Desktop Picture ] the ocean
[ Current Favorite Artist ] Kim Anderson, photographer
[ Current Favorite Group ] umm..Tiger Army.
[ Current Book ] The Perks of being a Wallflower, again
[ Current CD in CD Player ] Mix of emo songs
[ Current DVD In Player ] Almost Famous
[ Current Refreshment ]Cherry Coke
[ Current Worry ] Someones going to come home
[ Current Crush ] Nick and some others....kinda.
[ Current Favorite Celebrity ] i dunno...

[ You Touched ] hmm. Tory
[ You Talked to ] mom
[ You Hugged ] uh...redgate?
[ You Instant messaged ] Alex, hes away though does that still count?
[ You Yelled At ] sister
[ You Had A Crush On ] Nick? before that? ryland.
[ Who Broke Your Heart ] Nick.

[ Food ] Soup
[ Drink ] Cherry Coke
[ Color ] green
[ Album ] Tiger Army III, Ghost tigers rise
[ Candy ] Reeses
[ Animal ] horse? puppy? i dunno actually.
[ TV Show ] Mtv2 rock countdown
[ Movie ] Almost Famous, or Thirteen
[ Dance ] ?
[ Song ] i dunno....something emo
[ Vegetable ] Carrots
[ Fruit ] apples!!!
[ Cartoon ] Teen Titans

[ Understanding ] I think so
[ Open-minded ] Yea
[ Arrogant ] I dont think so
[ Insecure ] yep
[ Interesting ] sure
[ Random ] kinda
[ Hungry ] I used to be more hungry than I am now
[ Friendly ] yes
[ Smart ] yes, if i want to be
[ Moody ] yep
[ Childish ] kinda
[ Independent ] yea
[ Hard working ] when I want to be
[ Organized ] can be
[ Healthy ] sure
[ Emotionally Stable ] nope
[ Shy ] not really
[ Difficult ] nah
[ Attractive ] no
[ Bored Easily ] kinda
[ Messy ] somewhat
[ Thirsty ] not yet
[ Responsible ] yea
[ Obsessed ] yes. highly
[ Angry ] not really.
[ Sad ] yes
[ Happy ] kinda
[ Hyper ] Sometimes
[ Trusting ] yes, mostly
[ Talkative ] I can be
[ Legal ] no
[ Original ] Nope
[ Different ] Nah
[ Unique ] some what
[ Ignored ] i feel like it
[ Reliable ] depends on the person
[ Content ] nope
[ Optimistic ] About some things
[ Deep thinker ] Yea
[ Self-disciplined ] no
[ Sleepy ] No
[ Lonely ] kinda
[ sXe ] use to be...not really anymore

[ Kill ] julie
[ Slap ] kelsey
[ Get Really Wasted With ] redgate
[ Get High With ] kyle
[ Tickle ] kal
[ Look Like ] emily
[ Talk To Offline ] nick and others

Another one

// series one - you
-- Name: katie
--Birth date: feb 2
-- Birthplace: the cape of the cod
-- Current Location: kitchen
-- Hair Color: brown
-- Righty or Lefty: right
-- Zodiac Sign: aquarius

// series two - describe
-- Your heritage: i dunno
-- The shoes you wore today: doc martins, not now...earlier today
-- Your hair: Brown..
-- Your eyes: Hazel or Green or something
-- Your weakness?: people, love, emotions
-- Your fears:hate
-- Your perfect pizza: lots of meat
-- One thing you'd like to achieve: get better at life

// series three - what is
-- Your most overused phrase on aim: lol
-- Your thoughts first waking up: nick
-- The first feature you notice in the opposite(or same) sex: smile
-- Your best physical feature: lips
-- Your bedtime: none, but i retire around 9-1...between there
-- Your greatest accomplishment: kelsey
-- Your most missed memory: joseph

// series four - you prefer
-- Pepsi or coke: coke
-- McDonald's or Burger King: Whichever
-- Single or group dates: Doesnt matter
-- Adidas or Nike: adidas
-- Lipton or Nestea: neither
-- Chocolate or vanilla: vanilla
-- Cappuccino or coffee: cappuccino
-- Boxers or briefs: boxers if i had to choose.

// series five - do you
-- Smoke: yes
-- Cuss: fuck yes
-- Sing well: nah, i dunno
-- Take a shower everyday: no.
-- Have a crush(es): yes
-- Who are they: nick....and others
-- Do you think you've been in love: nah
-- Want to go to college: Maybe
-- Like school: not at all
-- Want to get married: ;)
-- Type w/ your fingers keys: no, i use too actually
-- Believe in yourself: no
-- Get motion sickness: no
-- Think you're attractive: no
-- Think you're a health freak: no
-- Get along with your parents:not really
-- Like thunderstorms: yes
-- Play an instrument: guitar, piano, some violin

// series six - in the past month, did/have you
-- Drank alcohol: yes
-- Smoke(d): yes
-- Done a drug: yes
-- Have Sex: no
-- Made Out: yes
-- Go on a date: yes
-- Go to the mall?: yes
-- Eaten an entire box of Oreos: no
-- Eaten sushi: no
-- Been on stage: no
-- Been dumped: no
-- Gone skating: like ice skating? no
-- Made homemade cookies: yes
-- Been in love: no
-- Gone skinny dipping: no
-- Dyed your hair: no
-- Stolen anything: I dont think so, maybe i did but dont remember but i doubt it

// series seven - have you ever
-- Played a game that required removal of clothing?: yea
-- If so, was it mixed company: yea
-- Been trashed or extremely intoxicated: yes
-- Been caught "doing something": maybe
-- Been called a tease: no
-- Gotten beaten up: yep
-- Shoplifted: yes
-- If so, did you get caught: no
-- Changed who you were to fit in: a long time ago

// series eight - the future
-- Age you hope to be married: no idea
-- Numbers and Names of Children: none
-- Descibe your Dream Wedding: doesnt matter
-- How do you want to die: suicide, or murdered
-- What do you want to be when you grow up: A journalist
-- What country would you most like to visit:gah.....CA

// series nine - opposite(same) sex
-- Best eye color?: brown
-- Best hair color?: brown
-- Short or long hair?: Short
-- Best height : tall
-- Best weight: Doesnt matter, like i really enjoy skinny boys
-- Best articles of clothing: girls pants, on boys.
-- Best first date location: anywhere
-- Best first kiss location: no idea

// series ten - number of
-- Number of girls I have kissed in my life: 10 or so
-- Number of girls you have made out with: maybe 4
-- Number of girlfriends you've had: none
-- Number of boys I have kissed: 10 or so
-- Number of boyfriends you've had: 3? i dunno.
-- Number of drugs taken illegally: no idea.
-- Number of people I could trust with my life: 3 maybe
-- Number of CDs that I own: 100?
-- Number of piercings: ears, 4 times. streching. had labret pierced...
-- Number of tattoos: had that weird one.
-- Number of times my name has appeared in the newspaper?: twice i think
-- Number of scars on my body: over 100, no lie. last i counted.....112.
-- Number of things in my past that I regret: lying


1. Who did you last get angry with: parents probably
2. What is your weapon of choice: words
3. Would you hit a member of the opposite sex: yes
4. How about of the same sex: yep
5. Who was the last person who got really angry at you: Julie
6. What is your pet peeve: uh...poseurs
7. Do you keep grudges, or can you let them go easily: depends

1. What is one thing you're supposed to do daily that you haven't done in a long
time: uh....clean my sheets
2. What is the latest you've ever woken up: 7 at night
3. Name a person you've been meaning to contact, but haven't: corey dixon
4. What is the last lame excuse you made: Im sick.
5. Have you ever watched an infomercial all the way through: yea
6. When was the last time you got a good workout in: i dunno....its been a while. i walk everyday though
7. How many times did you hit the snooze button on your alarm clock today: once

1. What is your overpriced yuppie beverage of choice: cherry coke
2. Meat eaters- white meat or dark meat: light
3. What is the greatest amount of alcohol you've had in one sitting/outing/event: dunno. alot.
4. Have you ever used a professional diet company: hahah yeah
5. Do you have an issue with your weight: eh..
6. Do you prefer sweets, salty foods, or spicy foods: spicy sweet foods
7. Have you ever looked at a small house pet or child and thought, "LUNCH!": never

1. How many people have you seen naked (not counting movies/family): two
2. How many people have seen YOU naked (not counting physicians/family): two
3. Have you ever caught yourself staring at the chest/crotch of a member of your
gender of choice during a normal conversation: yes
4. Have you "done it?":
5. What is your favorite body part on a person of your gender of choice: uh....hands
6. Have you ever been propositioned by a prostitute: no
7. Have you ever been tested for an STD or pregnancy: no

1. How many credit cards do you own: none
2. What's your guilty pleasure store: oh gosh....Sears
3. If you had $1 million, what would you do with it: no one needs that much money
4. Would you rather be rich, or famous: famous.
5. Would you accept a boring job if it meant you would make megabucks: no
6. Have you ever stolen anything: yes
7. Five things that you would never give up: friends, guitar, emotions, lips, room, joseph

1. What one thing have you done that you're most proud of: stopped lying mostly
2. What one thing have you done that your parents are most proud of: stopped being an ass
3. What thing would you like to accomplish in your life: to live to 25
4. Do you get annoyed by coming in second place: yes
5. Have you ever entered a contest of skill, knowing you were of much higher skill than
all the other competitors: no
6. Have you ever cheated on something to get a higher score: yea
7. What did you do today that you're proud of: considering i lyed to stay home...uh, i made my own breakfast

1. What item (or person) of your friend's would you most want to have for your
own: keiras pants
2. Who would you want to go on "Trading Spaces" with: chelsea
3. If you could be anyone else in the world for a day who would you be: amber
5. Have you ever wished you had a physical feature different from your own: yes
6. What inborn trait do you see in others that you wish you had for yourself: emotions that were happy.
7. Finally, what is your favorite deadly sin: i dunno, dont care..

sigh, im good now.

(1 Said she was beautiful | She wants to hear shes beautiful)

Subject:Let us be lovers.....
Time:4:43 pm.
Mood: happy.
Music:America (something, i dunno the name), simon and garfunkel.
sigh. alex, just so you know ive been thinking about you a lot..a lot a lot lately. i dunno, that before you get a crush on someone. that innocent lovely orgasmic type feeling. i dunno. this is all so strange. and for some reason ive been happier. a lot happier. and it feels weird, because usually im always so emo. im known as katie, the emo kid. sigh. well, yes. not much to say now...ill continue this entry later. wow look ive decided to edit and continute writing. hmm. interesting. well today was well...good. typical monday i guess, i was super organized though, and i totally emo-ed my binders and stuff, cept for my latin stuff...its all...all...latiny. lol. gosh, well in study redgate sat next to me...second study in a row. woot woot. this is all so exciting. and i thought about nick in math today with emily. and then actually i spent a lot of time thinking about alex. yeah. its all so odd, but yeah like i said before i get this really weird cute orgasmy type feeling, and its nice...and good. wow. im higly odd. man i sound like that mother fucker that i want dead...julie. gosh. i do love nick. i do like redgate, and i do have this weird crushy orgasmic alex thing going on in my body and mind right now. odd. odd i tell you. things are good. and i really want dot photo to work, so i can put some more pictures up here. man. sigh. jeez. i love emo, and being emo...being known as an emo punk kid. its all so nice and cute. and chelsea darling, i want you to bring your camera tomorrow. if possible . yes. well after school i hung out with sam and redgate. sam had italian cigarettes, because she came back from italy. and so we traded. 2 american marlboros for 2 italians. wait...3 actually. it was intense. i went with them while they smoked italian weed. i didnt though. which is a good thing. i felt extremely ugly today, even though sam told me i looked awful cute in my cute scarf and hat, and in the words of sam i quote, "katie, you look awful cute and very europe-y looking" even though it was just a scaft and hat, they are all little kid cute and matching, which is nice. then tory's mom drove me home. i actually highly enjoy staying after school, its really fun. wow, that just sounded really lame. im really happy. i dunno why. this isnt normal. i miss people. i want people. i need something and/or someone soon. gosh. i need a kiss. *gets all little kid and emo like and blushes*.

i really do need a kiss. sigh.

god, i want to cry. ^ i want that....i want someone who wants to give it to me....god im so emo.

i want that even more, and i really want someone who wants to give me tell me. sighs for all. i think im really going to cry.

now, you all think im a fuckin freak for loving this stuff and wanting it....fuck sigh.

bye bye beautiful.

comment, katie

Sunday, November 14th, 2004

(1 Said she was beautiful | She wants to hear shes beautiful)

Time:7:19 pm.
Mood: horny.
Music:Let me save you, Something Corporate.
ALEX IS AMAZING and he should stop denying it. gosh. meh. people can never take admiration well. blah. i really dont know what im feeling...a little awkward i think. i want nick to be online. i really do. meh, nothing really else on my mind. well actually yes, but within my protection of writing online, and considering the individuals that read this. so i guess ill post one of these things.

Questionaire. for anything that reads this, you are too copy and paste and fill answers.

Are we friends:
Howd we meet:
Do you like me:
More than a friend:
Think im ugly:
Think im beautiful:
Think im beautiful in more than a friendly way:
What do you think about when you see me:
Do you think about me at all:
How much:
Name a song that reminds you of me:
Give me a nickname, and explain why:
Do you love me:
More than a friend:
Do I love you:
More than a friend:
Care about me:
Do I care about you:
Good things about me:
Bad things:
Enjoy these things:
Gonna post this in your journal:

Ahh. now please, Im sorry but i really love these things. they really get me all orgasmic. really. sigh.

for you:

i try and be all cool, and awesome...and cool pretty good lookin. (i fail at all, laughs...sucha lame ass)

(2 Said she was beautiful | She wants to hear shes beautiful)

Time:6:21 pm.
Mood: amused.
Music:Tiger Army is for lovers..
alex is an amazing kid yeah darling, you know it. i am really serious. i just get this feeling thinking about you, its weird. anyways. i just got back from stop and shop. i got chapstick, yay! and emo kids shampoo, aka johnson&johnson baby shampoo...NO MORE TEARS. yay. maybe it will work, eh? laughs. well....i really dont have anything to say really. all i really wanted to post was that alex is an amazing boy. he should change his myspace name to alex is katies lover. because, thats the truth. smiles.

and hearts for you too.


this is for you alex:

please, please...tell me what you think of my ugly picture


Blurty for Katie is for lovers........!.

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